"Hnnnnnn." My eyelids feel heavy. But I force them open. Or at least I try to. They open. Marginally. But I can't tell what I'm seeing. It's all just white. It's been that way for a while now. Even my good eye can't seem to see anything but this damn snow anymore.
"Fu..." I can't even curse anymore. I'm too weak to open my mouth and talk. Much less do anything else. I can't move. Everything hurts. My heart is beating erratically. And I can't think straight. No matter how hard I try.
"Hey. Cap. I think he is waking up." Now I'm even suffering from hallucinations. I mean, when I could still move and walk, I had also seen things that weren't there. But now I'm even having auditory hallucinations.
"That kid is a fighter if I've ever seen one." Multiple voices tugging at the edges of my consciousness. Talking about something I can't quite get. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I know they must be hallucinations.
After all, they are speaking English. Not a language anyone in this world should know. On top of that, I can't see them. All I see is white. An infinite expanse of white before me.
"Well, Selric. Are you going to help the poor fella or not?" So I ignore the voices. I can't rely on hallucinations to save me. Instead, I focus every remaining piece of willpower I have to move. Even though I know it won't help. Even though I know I will die soon.
"Right. Hold up." One of the voices sounds a bit panicked as it gets further away. Then comes back closer. "Here. Drink this. It will help you feel better." I'm moving. My head is. I'm lifting it.
Or so I thought. Something is supporting it. Supporting me. Dimly, I realize it's a hand. But an actual hand shouldn't be part of an auditory hallucination. And neither should the cup I feel being held to my mouth be.
"Slowly now. If you make him drink too fast, he might choke and die." A new voice joined the chorus of hallucinations. A female voice.
Or maybe they were actually people. But I don't know. I don't know anything anymore. I can't focus. I can't concentrate on anything. But I hear them talk.
"Wait. Really? Fuck. Uhh. Can you do it instead, Myra?" This Selric guy seems kind of indecisive. But I get it. Or do I? I don't know. All I know is that my eyelids feel heavy. So I close them again. And things go dark.
I'll just sleep for a bit to recover. Even though I know I won't wake up again. But I do. Seconds later, I feel another hand take hold of me. Supporting my head gently. "Fine. I'll do it. But only this time."
Then I feel something in my mouth. Water. Or some other kind of liquid. And it hurts. Just like everything else hurts. I try my best to swallow it so as not to choke. But it's difficult. Extremely difficult. Luckily, whoever is pouring the liquid into my mouth is careful. Stopping just right when I was about to choke.
"There. That should do for starters." She says as I feel her let go of my head. Sinking back onto something soft. My hood. Or something similarly warm and comforting. "He'll probably fall back asleep. So you watch over him closely, Selric."
I can only agree with that assumption. The second my head hits the soft fabric below, I'm already drifting off. Even though I'm trying my hardest to stay alive. Knowing that if I fall asleep, I'll die. But even so. The last words I hear before everything goes dark are. "Yes. Ma'am." And then I'm gone.
I don't know for how long. I've long since stopped being able to tell how much time has passed. I don't even know if it's day or night when I wake up next. I can't tell. But what I do know is that I feel better.
A bit. Not much. But I feel better. I can actually open my eyes properly. Though moving my head or the rest of my body is difficult and slow. My limbs weigh me down like they are chained to the ground.
But I manage to turn my head. And I see an angel. A young man with pale blonde hair sticking out beneath a woolly cap. With clear blue eyes that look at me full of concern. "Hey. Think you can drink something?"
At first, I didn't understand the question at all. He sounds muffled and far away. It's like he is speaking to me from a different realm. An ethereal glow around him makes him seem divine. So I want to answer. But I can't.
"Hnnn." All that comes out of my mouth is a groan. Yet my savior in his divine wisdom understands. Swooping in and helping me lift my head carefully. "I'll just take that as a yes. Here." And once again, I feel some kind of divine liquid being poured into my throat. It's warm and tasty. Like I'm allowed to drink the ambrosia of the gods.
My stomach growls loudly in response to being given this gift. But I can't demand more. I'm not worthy. My body even rejects this divine gift. I'm wracked with pain as a cough tears through me.
Much to the concern and shock of my savior. "Ah. Fuck. Myra! Help!" And it's then that I learn the angel isn't alone. There is another angel here. I see her through my tears. Auburn hair and beautiful hazel green eyes full of warmth and care. A true goddess.
She takes me into her arms and supports me through my coughing fit. Rubbing and patting my back to stop me from coughing. "I warned you about making him drink too fast, Selric. Look what you did." She scolds the other angel even though it's not his fault.
But I can't defend him. I can't explain that it's all my fault for being unworthy. Even as he apologizes. "Sorry. Sorry." I can only cling to the woman holding me with every ounce of strength I have while trying to recover my breath. Gratefully letting her lay me back down on the ground where I can breathe a little easier.
"You and your shaky hands. Huuuuh." She sighs in frustration. But I barely hear that anymore. Already, darkness is creeping in again. My consciousness is fading even as I try my best to spend more time with these angels. With my saviours.
Or well. I mean, they are my saviors. But as it turns out, they aren't angels. Just people. Which is something I only realized a while later. Fading in and out of consciousness a couple more times. Each time, I was given something to drink before falling asleep again.
Until now. This time, when I open my eyes, my head is a lot clearer. I finally feel like myself again. My brain is finally receiving the necessary nutrients again to allow me to think clearly.
To allow me to form coherent thoughts. And words. "Thanks." I croak out towards Selric. Not that he seems to hear me. Focused on handling his sled right now as we zoom down a snowy hill.
I was tied to the part of the sled where cargo is usually stored. I feel a bit uncomfortable with being tied down like this. But I understand why they had to do this. They couldn't risk having me fall off mid-journey.
`That would probably kill me with how fast they are going.` I muse to myself as I close my eyes again. This time, not falling back asleep but just waiting until we stop somewhere. Only occasionally peeking my eyes open to see where we are. Though I can't really tell.
All I know is that we are heading towards Eidralore. I heard that during one of my brief periods of consciousness before. But only now does it click in my head what it means. That they must be some kind of scouts or something similar from Eidralore that have come to save me.
Though I'm not one hundred percent sure if their saving me was intentional or not. They might have just stumbled upon me by accident. But I plan on asking that once we stop, they can listen.
So I wait patiently for them to stop and make camp for the night. Camp that they make again once the sun starts to go down. And I'm finally untied by Selric. The young man with the blonde hair, who seemed to be responsible for me.
But this time, when he wants to lift me up and carry me over to the fire they made in the middle of camp, I do my best to move my hand to push his away. Not because I'm ungrateful or don't want him to touch me. But because I can't keep being a burden to these people.
"Wait. Don't carry me. I can walk." I explain as confidently as I can while I try to sit up. I used my elbows to push myself off the ground with all my strength. But Myra is quick to step in. "No, you don't." Somehow, she heard me despite my quiet voice. Pushing past a surprised Selric and reaching out for me.
To steady me. To support me. To carry me towards the sleeping spot they had prepared for me. "Sorry." I mutter out an apology, only for her to shake her head and roll her eyes. "For what? Being weak after almost dying just three days ago?"
The words she speaks trickle into my mind and immediately knock some thoughts loose. `So they found me just three days ago? It felt like weeks since they started taking care of me.` I'm surprised it's only been three days since they found me.
"Even so. I'm sorry for being a burden on you guys." My insistence to apologize only causes Myra to roll her eyes again as she puts me down on a fur sleeping bag. "Don't be. This is our job. To save others if they get lost out here." I nod while looking up at her.
Then a slight grin comes to my lips. "You know. Previously, I thought you were angels. Gods even. Because I was delirious. But now I can see you are just people. But damn. You actually do look like a goddess." I wink my one good eye at a stunned Myra.
"Pfffff. Ahahahaha. Kid, you must still be delirious if that's what you think." And as if my compliment hadn't been enough to make her go beet red. When Oswald starts laughing, the flush on her face creeps all the way up to the tips of her ears.
"Ohhh, shut up. Both of you." She mutters and throws some snow at Oswald. But even underneath her wool mask, I can see the smile she is trying to hide. She probably doesn't get complimented a lot.
"Hey. I'm serious. She is gorgeous. I mean it. And Selric has a heart of gold. And you are the coolest guy I know." So I continue teasingly sweet-talking her and the others. Well. Almost all of them. There is a fourth member of this squad called Garrun. But he seems the stoic type. So I don't think he'd appreciate sweet talk.
I mean, I'm only even complimenting them in hopes that, in some way, it serves as a start to paying the debt I owe to them back. "You are all so cool. I swear, whatever they are paying you and whatever respect people show you, it's not enough."
My words caused more laughter. Mostly from Oswald. The captain of the unit of outriders who has saved me from certain death. Though I can tell by the way Selric grins and Myra rolls her eyes that they seem to be enjoying themselves, too.
"You can say that again, Kid." Oswald comments while shaking his head and stepping closer to me. Looking down on me with a raised eyebrow and a challenging look. Even his beard is not able to hide the grin on his lips. "You know, I've once heard from a superior that if someone has enough energy to joke around, they have enough energy to be useful."
The meaning of his words is clear. "You bet." I respond with my own grin."No, you don't. You are too weak to even walk around, much less do any work." Only to be interrupted by Myra again. Her motherly worry about me is deeply appreciated, but I really can't rely on them for everything.
"Yes, Mom." I shot back with a roll of my eyes. Causing her to blush again as I call her Mom. Oswald giggled while patting Myra on the shoulder.
"You hear that, Mom? Your son doesn't need you to worry about him anymore. Oh, fast the birds leave the nest, right?" He adds. Earning himself not just some snow but an actual kick to the shin this time. Toppling him and shutting him up as he mutters out a curse.
"Alright, fine. If you have enough energy to joke around like that. You can do your own work." Myra states with an exasperated expression. Though I can tell that even so. Even though I'm annoying her, she would help if I needed it.
And as much as I appreciate that. As much as I appreciate everyone helping me in their own way. And I promise to pay them back. I can't lean on them any longer. Even though the time they have been taking care of me turned out to be shorter than I initially thought.
So I do my best to sit up. And to eat dinner by myself. It's soup for me. The so-called divine liquid I had drunk before turned out to be just some vegetable soup. But since I can chew again, they added some actual vegetables, bread, and meat this time.
All things I hungrily devour until I have my fill. Feeling stuffed for the first time in weeks. Or rather, since coming to this world. So, actually months.
In turn, I clean up after myself with some silent support from Garrun. Because, despite his stoicism, it's not like he is distant. In fact, he always quietly helps out wherever he can. Deserving of just as much of my respect as the others.
But out of all of them, Myra is the one who always looks out for me the most. Possibly because of motherly instinct or just in general feeling responsible for me. She even sleeps next to me in her sleeping bag. Close enough so I can whisper to her without disturbing the others as the evening draws to a close.
"So how much further is it to Eidralore?" I ask curiously as we lie next to each other, staring up at the sky. "We should arrive tomorrow without issue. Around noon." I nod at her words. Mulling things over before adding. "What if I insist on walking?"
Myra pauses for a few seconds before sighing and answering. "How slow do you think our sleds are? If you walk, it will take you at least two or three days." Her answer, in turn, causes me to sigh. Because I wanted to make the rest of the journey myself.
But I also don't want to slow them down. They deserve to go back to the city and take a break. To be with the people they love and do whatever it is they do. So I shrug my shoulders and give up. "Alright. Then I won't walk. But I don't want to be tied to the sled again tomorrow if possible."
A reasonable request, all things considered. A request Myra agrees with. Though reluctantly. "All right, fine. But you'd better hang on tight to Selric's sled. He is a good rider. But he's not used to having others on his sled yet. So be careful."
I nod my head in response to her warning. "I promise."
A promise I keep. Though it's not easy. But after going through what I went through since coming to this world, just clinging to a hound-drawn sled for a few hours isn't so bad. And when we finally arrive at Eidralore, I know that from here on out it's my turn to pay them back however I can. For saving my life. And for bringing me here. Out of that white, frigid hell behind us.