The Forbidden Forest was full of surprises, of course it was. Sirius Black had long stopped expecting anything ordinary from that place. When they'd been sent there the previous night for detention, he'd half expected to run into something that would try to eat them. Still, it had been worse than he imagined. Remus had warned him there were werewolves in those woods—the proper, dangerous kind that weren't exactly fond of conversation—but what they'd found hadn't been a werewolf at all, despite what Hagrid had insisted. It was something leaner, colder, and far older. A vampire. One of the ancient ones, judging from the way its pale face stretched like parchment over sharp bones, and the way its eyes glowed like dying embers in the dark.
He could still remember how fast it moved. The way it shifted its attention from Hagrid, who stood like a boulder with his crossbow—to Ren, who had been several feet away. In a blink, it was on her, pinning her to the ground before any of them could shout. Sirius had barely had time to think; he'd fired a Stunning Spell that hit the creature square in the chest. It barely slowed the thing, but it was enough to make it retreat, hissing like steam as it vanished into the trees. Ren had gone limp in the snow, out cold.
Sirius had visited her the morning in the hospital wing, but Madam Pomfrey had spotted him the moment he slipped through the door. "Out!" she'd snapped before he'd even reached her bed. He caught only a glimpse of Ren, pale and motionless, her hair fanned over the pillow like spilled ink. He'd wanted to see for himself that she was breathing fine, but Pomfrey's glare was enough to make him back off.
Later that day, he strolled out of Charms with James, feeling restless. The memory of the forest kept itching at him, so he did what he always did when things got too heavy. His eyes swept over the corridor, landing on a familiar face among a cluster of third-year Slytherins. Regulus. His dear, perfect brother. The younger Black offered a faint, knowing smirk, the kind that could mean hello or I'm still the better son. Sirius couldn't tell which, and frankly didn't care. He rolled his eyes and turned away before the old sting in his chest could dig any deeper.
"Oi, you two," Sirius called, snapping his fingers at a pair of wide-eyed first-year Gryffindors trailing nearby. They were easy to spot, their faces screamed worshipful. Perfect recruits. James shot Sirius a look of mock solemnity as he dug in his pocket and pulled out a small box of chocolates. Sirius, meanwhile, produced a tiny vial filled with a pink, shimmering liquid.
"You two have a very important mission," Sirius announced in his most serious voice, which immediately made James grin.
The first-years looked like they'd just been knighted. "Yes, sir!" one of them squeaked.
James coughed to cover a laugh while Sirius went on, handing them the box and vial. "Deliver these to Filch and make him pour this into the chocolates. Tell him you're thanking him for… keeping order or something boring like that. Oh, and don't forget the compliments. He likes those."
The two nodded with feverish enthusiasm, clutching their gifts like holy relics. Sirius and James watched from behind a corner as the first-years knocked on Filch's office door. The caretaker opened it, already scowling.
"What do you want?" he barked.
The kids stammered through the story exactly as rehearsed—praising Filch's "dedication" and "discipline" before politely asking him to help them "enhance" a thank-you gift for Professor McGonagall. Predictably, Filch's chest puffed up with pride. The fool actually smiled. He poured the sparkling potion onto the chocolates without hesitation, handed the box back, and sent the pair away.
James nearly doubled over laughing. "He actually did it!"
"Never underestimate the power of flattery," Sirius said, smirking.
The plan was simple, the chocolates, now soaked in a love potion, were to be gifted to one very deserving Slytherin—Severus Snape. Within an hour, the unsuspecting greasy-haired target had the box in his hands, courtesy of their innocent-looking messengers.
Sirius and James stood at the far end of the courtyard, biting their lips to keep from laughing as Snape examined the chocolates suspiciously.
Peter arrived just in time to catch them sniggering. "What are you two laughing about?" he asked, frowning.
Sirius threw an arm over his shoulder. "Ay, Pete, look at Snivellus there, eating chocolates laced with love potion. Courtesy of our friend Filch."
Peter blinked, then started laughing too. "You did what?"
"Only the best middleman for a masterpiece," Sirius said with mock pride.
They were still laughing when Lily Evans appeared at the far end of the courtyard. Snape straightened instantly, clutching the box.
"Oh, no," James muttered, his grin faltering as Snape walked toward her.
"Relax," Sirius said, watching with gleaming eyes. "Let's see where this goes."
Lily nodded as Snape offered her the chocolates, mumbling something awkward. Then, before James could intervene, she smiled politely and took them.
James stepped forward in alarm. "No—no, no, no—she wasn't our target!"
Sirius grabbed his arm, grinning wickedly. "Come on, mate. I like a bit of chaos."
Lily, oblivious, turned to walk away with the chocolates still in her hand. But before she could taste one, Ren appeared, brushing past her in the corridor fresh from the hospital wing. Lily caught her by the arm, smiling. "Hey, want one?"
Ren hesitated but accepted. The box looked harmless enough. She was about to pop one into her mouth when Peter suddenly dashed forward out of nowhere, slapping it out of her hand. The chocolate flew across the hall and hit the wall with a splat.
Sirius burst out laughing so hard he had to lean against the wall. "When the hell did he get there?"
James rubbed his face, half groaning, half laughing. "Poor Pete. He's dead either way."
Ren's expression darkened instantly. She turned on Peter, eyes blazing. "I—I'm sorry!" he stammered, trembling between guilt and panic. He couldn't bring himself to expose his friends, but he looked like he wished the floor would swallow him whole.
Lily blinked in confusion, Snape glared suspiciously, and Sirius—well, Sirius couldn't stop laughing even as chaos unfolded.