Yunyun showed up again sooner than Megumin expected. Two days later, having been re-taught "proper knowledge" by Yuiyui, she stood outside the Crimson Demon household wearing that same white dress from her first-love outfit and shouted, "Megumin! Get out here!"
"Huh?" Megumin opened her bedroom window and poked half her head out. "Oh, it's you. What do you want?"
Yunyun pointed at her, fingers trembling with fury, but before she could get a word out, Megumin cut her off first.
"Your hand's shaking that bad — did you catch some kind of illness?"
"You're the one who's sick! You actually... used that kind of... scripted lie to trick me!"
Only then did it dawn on Megumin — so Yunyun already knew the whole thing had been fake. But so what? It had been two days already; getting caught out now didn't matter one bit.
"Oh, that thing? Yes, yes, fine, I lied. Anything else?"
"Get out here! I challenge you to a duel!"
"Huh? Shouldn't you be looking for Jhin instead of me?"
"I'll beat you first, then go find Mr. Jhin!"
Megumin turned back inside and said, "You heard her. I'll be right back."
"Wait — Mr. Jhin is in your room?" Yunyun felt something was off, though she couldn't quite place what.
"Wait there a moment. I'll be right out."
With that, Megumin shut the window with a snap. About two or three minutes later, she walked out of the house with a hand clamped over her neck.
"Wh-why are you covering your neck?" Yunyun warily took two steps back, worried Megumin might be hiding a fistful of sand in her hand — that kind of dirty sneak attack was something Megumin had pulled plenty of times before.
Megumin waved her right hand. "Don't worry about the details. Anyway, since you're here, I take it you've climbed back out of the abyss of chaotic knowledge, huh?"
"Y-yes... so what?"
"Heh heh, then this'll be easy." She gave an odd little laugh and stepped closer to Yunyun, then revealed the neck she'd been covering the whole time — a clearly visible, deep red lip mark stamped on it.
A heady, unmistakable scent radiating off Megumin hit her full in the face, and combined with the kiss mark, it sent Yunyun staggering backward in shock, several big steps at once. Her small face flushed pale then red by turns, her gaze darting to the tightly shut window of the room. Her tongue felt tied in knots; she couldn't get a coherent word out.
Looking more closely now, whatever had felt off before finally made sense. Megumin's eyes were veiled in a faint mist, giving her a bewitching, alluring look. She wasn't even wearing her usual bandages or single-leg stocking, and her pale, soft thighs were dotted with glistening beads of sweat.
They couldn't have just been in the room...
How could a rookie fresh off the boat possibly match a seasoned veteran? Without saying another word, Megumin sent Yunyun fleeing in a panic. She even called after her retreating, flustered back, "Hey, the duel hasn't even started and you're already running?"
"I—I'll come back next time!"
"Heh, rookies really are..." Jhin slid the window open and cut in dryly, "Your lines are starting to sound more and more like some sleazy old man's."
"Well, who do you think I learned it from?"
"Careful, or I'll sue you for slander."
Megumin narrowed her eyes. "And who was it yesterday, shouting about giving me a taste of his infinite-ammo plasma cannon anti-air battery?"
"Good bro, I'm begging you — please don't casually blab about our private business out in the open, okay?"
"What are you scared of? There's nobody home but the two of us anyway."
"Then let's keep fighting. Quit talking so much."
"Bring it. Like I'd be scared of you." Megumin rolled her shoulders and hopped straight through the window into the bedroom, still hollering, "I'll show you a thing or two!"
As for how it ended... naturally, she wound up like a cream puff stuffed full of filling, left dazed and out of it until everyone else got home.
"Is the flower pastry production going smoothly?"
"Yeah, Aunt Yuiyui used magic to speed up production. It doesn't taste quite as good as what we make by hand, but it wins out on output."
Jhin shrugged and handed the freshly brewed tea to Pecorine. "That's just how mass production goes. If you want to guarantee output, the taste is bound to fall short of the handmade version."
"Hey, how come you're only serving tea to Pecorine? What about me and Kokkoro?"
Kyaru swatted his shoulder with her tail in displeasure, only for him to feed her a full cup of tea mouth-to-mouth. If their companions hadn't been right there, she probably would've melted into a puddle of contented kitten right on the spot.
Seeing this, Kokkoro hurriedly grabbed her own teacup and took small sips, pretending she hadn't noticed a thing.
A few days later, the factories in the Crimson Demon Village that produced sanitary pads and cherry-blossom pastries were attacked in the dead of night by an unidentified demonic creature. Though no one was hurt, sales took a severe hit — and for the Crimson Demon Clan, who relied on these two products as a steady economic lifeline, it was practically like someone had climbed on their heads and taken a dump.
Furious, the entire clan mobilized, eyes glowing red as they combed the night in a wide sweep for the creature that had attacked the factories, casting detection spells left and right like scattering beans.
Even so, the creature was never found — as if it possessed some innate, powerful anti-detection ability, because otherwise there was no way it could have slipped past a combined search by so many Archmages.
None of this affected the Gourmet Edifice much. Jhin had originally planned to go take a look at the damage to the two factories himself, but Yuiyui and Hyoizaburoo talked him out of it. He was, after all, the Crimson Demon Clan's biggest financial backer, and the attack was clearly aimed at those two products specifically — if he got attacked too, the two of them wouldn't be able to face the rest of the clan.
While the Crimson Demon Clan stayed on high alert, Jhin lived a blissfully idyllic life — taking turns rolling around in bed with Megumin and Kyaru each day, joining Kokkoro to tell Komekko bedtime stories, and heading out with Pecorine to gather ingredients and cook up delicious food.
Megumin felt she'd been getting a little too addicted to her boyfriend's charms lately — she hadn't cast Explosion magic in ages. Wracked with guilt toward her beloved Explosion magic, she once again succumbed to temptation, picked a fight, and got herself turned into a cream puff all over again.
After who knows how many rounds of this cycle, she clenched her small fists and declared with resolve, "Today, I am absolutely going out to cast one blast of Explosion magic!"
"Oh, now that's some real conviction."
Moved by her spirit, Jhin clapped enthusiastically. Megumin's small face flushed red from the applause, and she let out a couple of little piggy grunts.
Two hours later, the two of them got properly dressed, told the others where they were headed, and set out from the house.
Being the extra petty, grudge-holding Jet-Black Explosion Mage that she was, Megumin picked her casting spot this time not far from the Orc territory they'd passed through when they first arrived at the Crimson Demon Village.
"Feel honored — you get to die beneath the combo attack of the Jet-Black Explosion Mage and the Pure Blue Starlight Warrior!"
"Are you trying to wipe out an entire race here?"
"Relax, Orcs are like those goblins you told me about — they're everywhere in this region. The clan usually has to clear them out periodically anyway."
Jhin decided not to argue the point further. He drew the Void weapon out from within her, laced his fingers with hers, and began channeling the spell.
By the time crimson lightning shattered the clouds and tore open space itself, the two of them finally realized — this blast's power seemed... maybe a little too much.
____
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