The idol group,
They were the martial arts-dols confidently launched by the CEO of the K-tsch Agency, a martial arts fanatic with a suspicious amount of money.
Gupailbang refers to the Nine Factions—Shaolin, Huashan, Wudang, Zhongnan, Diancang, Kunlun, Qingcheng, Kongtong, and Emei—plus the Beggars' Sect.
Just hearing that, you would think they were a 10-member group, but they are currently active as a 5-member group. Of course, they were a 10-member group when they started. But as Zhongnan, Diancang, Kunlun, Qingcheng, Kongtong, and Emei left one after another, only five members remained. If you're wondering how five remain after six left, it's because we recruited one new member. That kid is from the Namgung Family. At this point, they aren't even really the Nine Factions.
In any case, Gupailbang is undeniably a 1st-tier idol group in Korea, enjoying popularity that rivals any other, despite having had many incidents.
…When the CEO first told me to manage martial arts-dols, I thought he'd been shot in the head, but to think it actually worked. The idol scene is truly impossible to figure out. But what's even more impossible to figure out is this current situation.
"You're… really the Heavenly Demon?"
"I am."
"You're the real Heavenly Demon, and you want to… be an idol?"
"I do."
"Why?"
"..."
The Heavenly Demon just stared at me blankly, without answering. His eyes seemed to ask, Must I explain that as well?
"How did you come to know of Gupailbang?"
"I heard that in Korea, one who does not know Gupailbang is a spy."
"…You're from the Central Plains, aren't you?"
"It has been quite some time since I fell into this place."
Fell? …An isekai trip? That was knowledge I had acquired while plowing through countless web novels to study Gupailbang's martial arts worldview. It literally means to be dropped into another world.
"During that time, I investigated and grasped the culture of this place in my own way."
The Heavenly Demon closed his eyes gently. After seeming to recall the events of the past for a moment, the Heavenly Demon opened his mouth.
"The result is that I must become an idol."
"That conclusion is strange, isn't it?"
What possible reason could there be for a Heavenly Demon who transmigrated to another world to become an idol?
"What is strange? These days, Heavenly Demons open cafes, become conglomerate heirs, and even become actors. Is there a rule that one cannot become an idol?"
"Excuse me?"
The Heavenly Demon smirked, as if to say, Did you think I wouldn't even know that?
"I searched for it all on the internet."
"Are you talking about web novels?"
"Wretch, cut the chatter. You merely need to make me an idol."
"I'm not a wretch, I'm Gupailbang's manager."
"What is a manager?"
"An administrator."
"Administrator wretch, that's enough. Go and fetch your CEO."
"...!"
Come to think of it, this wasn't a problem I needed to agonize over. In the first place, if the CEO hadn't launched a martial arts concept idol group, a Heavenly Demon wouldn't have randomly invaded the office. I decided to pass the Heavenly Demon off to the CEO.
* * *
The CEO, who had clearly suffered qi deviation in the head, spoke.
"We will recruit him as a new member of Gupailbang."
"Are you serious?"
"He's handsome, isn't he?"
Our CEO is a truly unbiased and fair person. It seems that when he looks at people, he sees nothing but their faces. To think he would insert a man from the Central Plains with a rock-bottom personality, who had just smashed the office window, into his agency's 1st-tier idol group, just because he was handsome.
"So-ui ssi, what do you think is the most important thing for an idol?"
"…Skill?"
"..."
"Yep. Sorry. It's the face."
"Exactly. The face. In martial arts novels, there is one thing that is natural and essential. That is the refined appearance of the characters. An ugly martial arts protagonist is unacceptable, and it's a worldview where even descriptions like 'skin like white jade and lips of red' are permitted for the male lead. That is muhyeop."
I glanced sideways at the Heavenly Demon. The Heavenly Demon, sitting arrogantly in the CEO's chair, certainly had an unrefined feel, but his beauty was indeed comparable to our Gupailbang's leader, who was said to have conquered the idol scene with his face.
"The next most important thing is skill. Dancing? What does it mean to dance well? It means one uses their body well. And what is a Heavenly Demon? It means he uses his body damn well."
"What about singing?"
"Even if we made him read a textbook, his voice alone would carry him."
…It looks like he's serious.
"No, but… what about the worldview? Gupailbang's concept is the Righteous Faction."
In martial arts novels, Gupailbang is the Righteous Faction—that is, the ones with a proper mindset—while the Heavenly Demon is an existence with a demonic mindset. The Righteous Faction and the Heavenly Demon do not get along, so much so that they fight a war called the Righteous-Demonic Great War. It's an archenemy sort of feeling. Surely the martial arts-obsessed CEO couldn't be ignorant of this.
"The fans will hate it if a new member is suddenly the Heavenly Demon."
"They won't."
"What makes you think that?"
"Because he's handsome."
It's even more annoying because I can't refute it.
"CEO wretch, and administrator wretch."
The Heavenly Demon, who had been listening quietly, interjected arrogantly.
"Must this master wait any longer?"
The CEO didn't seem the least bit offended at being called a wretch; no, rather, he answered the Heavenly Demon with an expression of deep gratitude for being addressed.
"Of course not. Our discussion is finished."
"Then am I debuting? As an idol."
"Yes, but there are procedures, so you'll have to greet the kids first."
"The kids?"
"Gupailbang. The members you'll be working with from now on."
"This master is the Heavenly Demon, yet you say I must operate as part of Gupailbang? This is most displeasing."
See? Even the Heavenly Demon hates it. The CEO replied politely, his expression unchanged.
"If you wish to debut solo, you will have to wait about a year."
"I must go see my members."
The Heavenly Demon pushed himself up from the seat. It seems the CEO's knack for sweet-talking members, honed back in the day when he worked as a manager himself for his small agency, hadn't gone anywhere.
The Heavenly Demon was about to leave the CEO's office, but stopped and looked back at me.
"What are you doing, not following, wretch?"
"Me?"
"Are you not Gupailbang's administrator? From now on, you shall attend to this master."
"Hey, I never agreed to recruiting a new member."
The Heavenly Demon furrowed his brow beautifully and looked at the CEO.
"So he says."
"You don't need to worry about it. How can he object when he's in a position to receive his salary from me? Starting today, he will be exclusively in charge of Lord Heavenly Demon."
"So he says?"
"No, CEO-nim, if you just decide things like that…"
"Salary doubled."
"If you just decide to raise my salary so wonderfully, I am grateful. Lord Heavenly Demon, shall we head down? As it happens, the friend who serves as the Martial Alliance Leader of Gupailbang is at the company."
"I know I hired you, but you're really materialistic."
"Sorry? I couldn't hear you over the sound of my salary increasing."
"I said, take Lord Heavenly Demon and go see the Alliance Leader."
"Yep. Lord Heavenly Demon, this way please."
The Heavenly Demon stared at the now-motivated me with slightly weary eyes.
"…Fine. Let's go, money-loving wretch."
How can he speak so rudely? I escorted Lord Heavenly Demon downstairs.
* * *
"Uh..."
The Alliance Leader's face, rumored to have conquered the idol scene, colored with bewilderment. The Alliance Leader, still looking like he hadn't fully grasped the situation, but maintaining his composure with the experience gained from expelling and recruiting numerous members over many years, asked.
"So, a new member? This person here?"
"Correct."
The Heavenly Demon answered before I could. He then asked, showing unexpected and profound curiosity.
"Are you the Martial Alliance Leader?"
"Pardon? Ah, yes. I am in charge of the Martial Alliance Leader role in Gupailbang."
The Alliance Leader, as expected of someone who has rolled in the jungle-like idol scene, tactfully replied in polite speech. The Heavenly Demon, in his own way, was admiring the Alliance Leader.
"Hooh… You are different from what I saw on N-tube."
"You watch N-tube, too?"
Come to think of it, he seemed to read web novels too. The Heavenly Demon was strangely well-versed in modern civilization. Although he said he had investigated and grasped it on his own, it seemed he had acquired only biased information.
"It looked like you were using pyrokinesis… but seeing how well you've refined your energy, your realm must not be so low, I gather?"
I pray that 'pyrokinesis' isn't referring to the fire effects in the music video.
"Ah… you don't have to adhere that strictly to the CEO's orders about maintaining the concept at all times."
It seemed the Alliance Leader thought the Heavenly Demon was doing this crazy act as part of a concept. After all, when the Alliance Leader himself first debuted, he used hao speech to everyone, just as the CEO ordered. That era is a huge dark history for the Alliance Leader, and bringing it up makes him go dark, so I have to be careful what I say.
"If you are the Martial Alliance Leader, then who is the current First Sword?"
At the Heavenly Demon's question, the Alliance Leader blinked his deer-like eyes with a puzzled face.
"I am the First Sword."
That's right. The Alliance Leader's real name is Jeilgeom (First Sword). There's no need to find it strange that an idol group leader's real name is Jeilgeom. Gupailbang was formed by the suspiciously wealthy CEO picking out kids just like that. The newly recruited Namgung Family kid's actual surname is Namgung, after all.
The Heavenly Demon, who naturally had no way of knowing his name was just Jeilgeom, raised an eyebrow as if he'd heard something unexpected.
"You are the First Sword?"
"Wait… you don't know me?"
"Why would this master know the likes of you?"
"You just said you saw me on N-tube…"
"I know your face."
"…Didn't you say you were our new member?"
"I did."
"But you don't know me…?"
The Alliance Leader's eyes wavered, and he looked at me, demanding an explanation.
"It's a long story. No, wait, it's short. That person is the real Heavenly Demon, he came here saying he wants to be an idol, so the CEO said he'd let him debut in Gupailbang."
"What? Ah..."
The Alliance Leader pondered for a moment before speaking.
"Our concept is the Righteous Faction. Is it okay for a Heavenly Demon to join?"
"That's your takeaway from this? You believe it just like that?"
"It's too low-effort for a hidden camera, and more importantly, the Cheonma person behind you is currently sitting in mid-air."
I turned around, and the Heavenly Demon was sitting in the air with his legs crossed, observing us.
"What the fuck is that?"
"We won't need wires for the concert. Right?"
"Is that what's important to you right now?"
"What did the CEO say?"
"He said it's fine because he's handsome."
"Ah. Understood. Then he'll have to greet the other members, too."
He was so calm that I felt embarrassed for making such a fuss. This is what it takes to survive as a 1st-tier idol in this business.
"We're almost at the end of our current promotions, so we'll finish up, prepare the new song together, and then announce him."
"Wait."
The Heavenly Demon arrogantly held out his hand, stopping the Alliance Leader, and spoke.
"This master wishes to debut immediately."
"Pardon? But to perform the existing song, you'll have to memorize the choreography and the song first. We also have to redistribute the parts."
"Then distribute them within the day. I will take care of the rest."
Even the good-natured Alliance Leader frowned, troubled.
"It's not that simple."
"Even if it is not simple, make it so."
"…As the leader of this group, if you continue to be this selfish, I have no choice but to oppose recruiting a new member. This is something five people were doing, and now six have to do it. If you demand we give up parts immediately, the other kids will object too."
"I have no intention of sharing parts with Righteous Faction wretches."
"Are you saying you want to be a solo artist?"
"No. The solo debut is delayed."
"Are you saying you're going to devour our kids' parts just so you can debut?"
Just then, the Heavenly Demon stretched his hand toward me. The smartphone I had in my jacket pocket floated smoothly into the air and was pulled into the Heavenly Demon's hand. I was startled.
"That's Void Grasp…!"
"Brother, you sound just like you're in a martial arts novel."
"It just felt like I should."
The Heavenly Demon turned on N-tube and held the phone out to us. On the phone he presented, the music video for Gupailbang's current promotion song, "Mind of Diamond-Hard Invincibility," was playing.
"This is the part I want."
Saying so, the Heavenly Demon pointed at the screen. ...Hm?
"The song hasn't even started yet?"
"What are you talking about? Watch closely what the Alliance Leader wretch does."
The Heavenly Demon rewound the video to the beginning and played it. The scene where the camera silently panned across the members' faces passed, and just as the Heavenly Demon said, the Alliance Leader did open his mouth, but…
– Gupailbang. Above the Heavens, Below the Earth.
"This… this is just the opening."
That's right. The part the Heavenly Demon wanted wasn't a song or a rap, but the two-line opening chant at the very beginning, purely for coolness.
"Correct. Hand over this part."
"...!"
As both the Alliance Leader and I stared in astonishment, the Heavenly Demon twisted his lips into a smile.
"This master does not take anything but the best. Martial Alliance Leader Jeilgeom. Hand over your part."
"…You mean, my entire part?"
"Must this master take responsibility for the rest of your parts as well?"
"No, so, you mean just that part?"
"Correct."
The Alliance Leader pressed his forehead, looking confused. The Heavenly Demon added cruelly in an indifferent voice.
"You barely had any parts to begin with."
"...!"
The Alliance Leader looked hurt, but he decided to willingly give up his two-line opening. The Heavenly Demon smiled, satisfied, with Gupailbang's new song
Gupailbang. Above the heavens, below the earth.In other words, I alone am the honored oneGot no masterDon't bother with mannersMy mind is diamond-hard invincibilityIt doesn'tGet hurt that easilyBut still, sometimes I stumbleRoll around uncoolyI'm not ashamedQi Deviation, what's up, punkDon't be scared, training day and nightDreaming of a total rebirth?Just borrow money from meI present to you, chaosWe bring order to the martial worldGupailbangWondering why there are five members?You'll find out soonKahl!