After binding the Shuangwen system, I was in a bad position.
system says: 'Please spend 100 million in half an hour, and if you fail, 50 years of life will be deducted.'
I lay on the sofa and swiped my phone: 'Buckle, I wouldn't have lived to retirement age if I was a social animal.'
system is silent for three seconds: 'Detects host negative task, activates the punishment mechanism—'
'Immediately experience labor pain, contractions every hour for 24 hours.'
I sat up excitedly, 'And this kind of good thing? Help me make an appointment for the live broadcast of the obstetrics and gynecology hospital!'
'Just give me the on-site teaching of the mother-in-law who gave birth!'
system is completely insane.
---
An emotionless electronic sound suddenly exploded in Chen Nian's mind:
'Ding! The Shenhao Shuangwen system is successfully bound! Beginner task release: Please spend 100 million yuan within half an hour. If the mission fails, the host's lifespan will be deducted for fifty years. At that time, she was slumped on the sofa in the rental house that was about to fall apart, like a piece of chewing gum spit out after being chewed by life for three days and three nights, sticky and desperate. His fingers weakly scratched the mobile phone screen, and the voice of 'Mother' just popped up above: 'Nian Nian, when do you want a child?' Aunt Wang's grandson next door will make soy sauce! Aunt Wang said, what kind of 'childbirth experience device' is there now, men can experience it, just you are squeamish! The following is followed by the boss's notice: 'On Saturday team building, all staff must be present and counted as attendance.
A translucent virtual screen appeared out of thin air in front of me, and a string of scattered scattered eyes was dizzying.
1,0000,0000.00¥
Countdown: 29:59.
But Chen Nian just lifted his eyelids, and even the frequency of his breathing did not change.
'Buckle,' her voice was lazy, with a kind of numbness after being beaten repeatedly by life, 'Buckle hard.' A social animal like me, who was scolded eight times a day and worked overtime to achieve endocrine disorders, would not have lived to retirement age. Fifty years? You directly deduct it as a negative number for me, so that I can feel the blessings of the next life in advance, okay?'
System: '...'
The cold electronic sound seemed to be stuck for 0.5 seconds.
' Warning! Detected that the host has a serious negative task tendency! According to Article 7, Paragraph 3 of the System Management Regulations, the first-level punishment mechanism - electric shock punishment is activated! As soon as the voice fell, Chen Nian felt a strong electric current rushing all over his body, and his limbs and bones twitched violently uncontrollably, and his hair almost stood up.
'Uh... ... her teeth trembled, but at the moment when the current was interrupted, she squeezed out intermittent laughter from her throat, 'Shu... Comfortable... Just cure my ... Frozen ... System baby, strength ... A little bigger... '
system: '...'
The electronic sounds seem to be distorted: 'Warning! Electric shock punishment is ineffective! Activate the secondary punishment mechanism - experience the ultimate pain of giving without anesthesia today! Simulate contractions every hour, each lasting five minutes, 24 hours a day! Get started now!
The severe pain exploded from her lower abdomen, as if an invisible hand was tearing her internal organs desperately.
'Ah...' Chen Nian cried out in pain, and the corners of his forehead were instantly wet with cold sweat.
Just when the system thought that this cunning man was finally going to comply -
Chen Nian suddenly sat up straight, grinning in pain, but those stagnant eyes burst out with an almost fanatical light that the system had never seen since its birth!
'This is the !! that is waiting' Because she was excited, her voice split, 'Quick! Hurry up! Help me contact the best obstetrics and gynecology hospital in the city and ask them if they can pick up the live broadcast of the pain experience! Hang me an expert number! No, just reserve the venue! Just for my mother-in-law, who gives birth every day, and her group of old sisters who stand and talk without back pain, to have a live teaching! As she said, she had already taken out her mobile phone with her hands explosively, and her fingertips were almost rubbing sparks on the screen.
'Mom! The live broadcast link has been sent to you! Yes, it is the sin that you say every day, 'Women are not incomplete from this sin'! Today, your daughter and me, live teaching, teaching and meeting, will not be replayed for free! Hurry up and call all the three aunts and six wives in the 'happy family' to observe and learn what 'completeness' is!' Look at the process of 'easily 'ripe melons and stems' in your mouths, what does it taste like!'
She danced to the air, commanding a high-spirited man, and even the severe pain in her abdomen seemed to have become a medal of glory. Her mobile phone began to vibrate wildly, and the messages in the WeChat group of 'Happy Family' exploded, and the missed call ID 'mother-in-law' aunt and 'second aunt' were lining up to pour in.
'System! System baby! Don't rest! Can the frequency of contractions be adjusted a little higher? A little more intense! Let's strive for a live broadcast to eradicate the PTSD of all women in my family! I want them to be weak when they see the word 'give birth' in the future!' Hahahaha!
The more she spoke, the more excited she became, and even a blush of great revenge and proud eyebrows appeared on her face.
In my head, the cold electronic sound emitted a series of chaotic noises that seemed to be short-circuited.
[Zizi... Warn... Host behavior... Incomprehensible ... ...]
[Logic Module... Overload ...]
[Emotion Simulator... Collapse ...]
[Penalty Mechanism... Decide... Mistake... After a long ...]
[beep——]
sound, the sound of the system disappeared, and even the terrible pain of childbirth came to an abrupt end.
Only on the virtual screen, the countdown to 100 million yuan is still beating silently.
26:41.
Chen Nian smacked his lips unfinished and shouted into the air dissatisfied: 'Hey? That's it? Don't! Where is this? I've just gotten into the groove! Your system service is not in place, bad review!
She touched her lower abdomen, which was no longer painful at all, and sighed regretfully. The eyes fell back on the huge amount of 100 million yuan still hovering in front of him and the decreasing countdown.
She touched her chin and fell into deep thought.
for a while.
Her eyes lit up suddenly, she picked up her phone again, and quickly pointed her finger to a contact person with the note 'Black Heart Zhang Papi'. Remembering last week, Zhang Papi took the plan she had worked overtime for three months as his own, patted her on the shoulder at the celebration banquet and said: 'Xiao Chen, although his ability is average, his attitude is worthy of recognition!' Young people should precipitate more! 's disgusting face.
Chen Nian cleared his throat, adjusted a voice that was so sweet and flattering that it was disgusting, and pressed the voice send button:
'Mr. Zhang~~ Oh, it's me, Xiao Chen Chen~ Are you busy now? I have great news for you! '
'I just got a small, about 100 million yuan~ I just want to ask our department, is there any special, special, special money burning project recently, but absolutely, absolutely, absolutely impossible to do? '
'Yes, yes! You heard it right! It's the kind of peerless bad project that you can't even hear how much money you throw into it, and you lose 100% of your money!
'Oh, don't worry! I personally donated this money to the department free of charge! Don't give anything in return! The success or failure of the project will definitely not affect your performance appraisal! I simply want to make some 'contribution' to the department and contribute to the company's failure case library~'
'Look... Are you interested in helping me with this 'little favor' and giving me this 100 million quickly, neatly, and cleanly?
In the process of her voice transmission, the system screen flashed violently, and the garbled pop-up window jumped wildly: [... Untie... Divide... No... can...] [... Rules... Rule... Storehouse... Unclean... Dye...] [... Nucleus... Heart... Calculate... Law... Collapse... In the end, all the garbled characters merged into a snowflake, and the screen returned to dead silence.
The voice was sent successfully.
Chen Nian threw his mobile phone on the sofa and collapsed back again, Erlang's legs were comfortably raised, and his toes swayed.
She smiled with satisfaction imagining Zhang Papi's face distorted by greed and suspicion, and the tragic situation of his future desperation and final ruin in order to lose the hundred million.
She hummed an out-of-tune tune and whispered to the dead system:
'Did you see it?' This is called professional 'rotten' - use your task to solve my problem. Mix with me in the future, I promise to let you experience what it means to stand ...
and give the system to PUA.
Her voice fell, and the translucent system screen flashed twice, and finally, the countdown and amount of 100 million yuan slowly disappeared, leaving only a large, crooked white font that seemed to be drawn by hand on the screen:
[You are awesome.]
Then, the screen went completely dark.
On the sofa, Chen Nian's upturned toes swayed gently, like a satisfied cat that had just eaten.
The world was in her ear, and she closed her mouth gently.