My Dad exclaimed. The volume of his voice made me take an involuntary step back. Even though I was a little scared, I still couldn't help but wonder what he meant.
"A-A competition?"
My Dad wrapped his arms around me and lifted me in the air. He has never put his hands on me without it hurting. Before I could even process what was happening, he spoke again.
"I will be on a team with my son." He then looked in the direction of my Mom.
"And you will be on a team with Lily. Whoever scores the most points is the winner!"
So… that's what he meant by competition.
An ember of excitement ignited in my heart, but my body was still frozen in fear. It just sounded too good to be true, and I knew better than to believe in those things.
Is he going to hit me if we lose? No, nonono! I don't want to!
A single tear slid down my cheek. My Dad, who was still holding me, noticed instantly. He turned his gaze towards me. I tensed under the pressure of that gaze.
"What's wrong?"
He asked in a concerned tone. I tried to say something, but I kept stammering over my words. A cold sweat began to roll down my face.
"No-nothing's wrong." I said in a hurried tone.
Dad frowned slightly, and he slowly brought me to the ground. My heart dropped to my stomach as he looked at me in a way I didn't understand.
Did I ruin the day? Will I not get to play the game?
Before I could spiral any further, Dad crouched down and gave me a pat on the head.
"There's nothing to be scared of, all that matters is having fun!"
He let out a billowing childish laugh, attracting the attention of everyone in the arcade. That laugh made me want to laugh too, but I was still too scared. I clenched the bottom of my shirt as I pushed the words out of my throat.
"But… what if we lose?"
He looked at me, brows furrowed together in confusion. But a warm smile quickly spread across his face.
"Who cares if we lose! As long as we play together and try our best, that's all that matters!"
He clenched his hand into a ball and put it in front of me. I flinched in response, thinking he was going to punch me.
"So, let's do this, partner!"
I stared at his hand.
Was he trying to give me… a fistbump?
I looked at his eyes once again. The chilling, detached expression of my Father wasn't there. In its place was the warm, funny gaze of my childish Dad. I felt my doubt slowly being replaced with relief and excitement. It seemed he had noticed that too.
"Now, let's win this!"
I gave him a look of determination back and nodded my head, returning his fistbump.
"Yeah!"
He quickly picked me up and lifted me into the air, spinning me around. I couldn't help but let out a laugh at how fun this was and how happy he looked.
"That's my boy!"
We then started the game. My Mom was holding my sister up, and Dad was holding me. Every time I missed a shot, he would tell me "it's okay", hand me another ball, and try again. After 2 rounds, I finally made one in. I looked up at my Dad in excitement, waiting to see his reaction. Before I could even say anything, he embraced me tightly with both arms and kissed me on the cheek.
"You did it, son, you actually did it! Good job!"
"YEAH!"
He lifted me into the air in celebration. I let out a childish giggle, and he gave me a warm smile in return. However, this moment of bliss didn't last long as my sister started crying. He slowly brought me down to earth, and we both looked at my sister. He put me down on the floor and walked towards her.
No… please don't hit her!
I took a step forward to try to stop him, but it was too late. He took my sister from my Mom's arms and held her close to him.
"Do you want to score a point too?"
My sister nodded sadly.
"Perfect! I wanted to play with you, too! Team change: I'm now on your team, and Hoshino is with Mom. Is that okay with you?"
He wiped the remainder of my sister's tears and made his way towards the game. That's when I realized he was just doing the same thing to her as he did to me. Thank goodness.
My Mom picked me up from behind and brought me in close. She gave me a soft smile that made something inside me want to try my hardest.
Why… does she look like that?
"We can't lose to them now, can we? Let's win." Her words were like a lullaby.
I didn't understand it as a kid, but at the same time, I also didn't care enough at the moment. All I wanted to do was have fun.
I excitedly nodded my head.
"Yes!"
She carried me over to the machine where we started our third and final round. My sister managed to score one point in the opening of the game. Dad immediately turned her towards him and showered her in kisses.
"THAT'S MY LOVELY DAUGHTER!"
Lily tried to push him away with her little hands, but the old man didn't budge.
"Hehehe, Dad, stop! We are still playing!"
"Ah, you're right, sorry. Let's keep going!"
He pulled his face away from my sister and happily handed her another ball. Every time Lily missed a shot, he would dramatically stagger back as if in shock that his lovely daughter could ever fail. A small sting of jealousy crept into my heart.
"Well, we can't lose to them now, can we?"
A tender whisper suddenly reached my ears. Despite it being a whisper, it overpowered even the loud laughter from my Dad and sister. I turned my face to the side and gazed at Mom. Her soft smile remained, but there was a hint of melancholy in her eyes. The envy I felt disappeared just as quickly as it came. I didn't know what it was at the time, but she possessed a certain power that I didn't understand.
"Let's show them what we can do, okay?"
When she said that, I forgot about everything else except my determination to win. I hurriedly nodded my head.
"Yes, let's win!"
She reached over and grabbed a ball, handing it to me. I picked it up from her hand and threw it up. We repeated that same motion until the game was over. I focused on the scoreboard; Lily had scored one point, meanwhile, I scored two. My mouth went wide as I excitedly pointed to the scoreboard, hoping Mom would see.
"WE DID IT, MOM! WE BEAT THEM!"
She turned me over to face her and gave me a tight hug. Her warmth spread through my entire body.
"No, you did it, son. You did a good job."
I was confused as to why she emphasized me, as if I were the sole reason we won when it was a team effort. But the happiness of hearing my Mom congratulate me swept me away at that moment.
My view slowly drifted back until I could see both my Mom and little me in the third person. This is the type of scene where people would normally look back on and say things like, "Wow, things were so much fun back then!" But I couldn't help but clench my fists and click my tongue. There's no point in this, after all…
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LILY POV:
I stood far away as I "watched" myself get doted on by Dad while Mom doted on my Brother. I felt the urge to take a step forward. I'd do anything to get even a little closer to that happiness– but I forced myself to remain where I was. A self-deprecating chuckle left my mouth.
God, what am I even doing right now?
I hung my head low, causing my bangs to fall from the top of my head, blocking the view of the memory. It's… better this way, after all…
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LILY AND HOSHINO POV:
It's nothing more than a fleeting memory.
