The Royal Dining Hall was quiet, mostly because the people eating there hated each other.
At the head of the table sat an empty chair—reserved for the Emperor, who never showed up. Down the sides sat my siblings.
There was the 1st Prince, a literal giant in armor who was currently eating a whole chicken, bones and all.
There was the 2nd Princess, a vampire beauty who was sipping something red from a crystal flute.
And then, there was him.
The 3rd Prince, Darius.
He sat across from my empty seat, looking smug. He was tapping his fingers on the table, checking his pocket watch every ten seconds. He was waiting for the news. He was waiting for a servant to run in screaming, "Prince Valerius has been murdered in his bed!"
I watched him from the shadows of the hallway for a second, adjusting my collar.
Showtime.
I walked in. I didn't teleport. I didn't kick the door down. I just strolled in, yawning, looking like I had the best sleep of my life.
"Morning, everyone," I chirped. "Pass the butter."
The sound of silverware hitting plates echoed through the hall.
Darius dropped his fork. His jaw actually unhinged slightly before he snapped it shut. He looked at me like he was seeing a ghost.
"Valerius?" he choked out. "You... you are awake?"
"Yeah," I said, pulling out my chair. "Usually happens after sleeping. It's a biological process."
I sat down and started piling toast onto my plate.
Darius was staring at me. His eyes were darting around my body, looking for wounds, poison spots, anything. He couldn't process it. He had sent a Tier-4 Shadow Stalker. I should be a corpse.
"You look surprised, brother," I said, biting into a piece of toast. Crunch. "Did you bet against me waking up or something?"
"No," Darius hissed, composing himself. "I just... heard there was a disturbance in the West Wing last night. I was worried about your safety."
"Oh, that," I waved my knife casually. "Yeah, I had a visitor."
The table went silent. Even the 1st Prince stopped chewing his chicken bones.
Darius leaned forward, his eyes narrowing. "A... visitor?"
"Yeah. Some guy in a black skinsuit," I said, talking with my mouth full. "Very rude. Didn't even knock. He came into my room, jumped on my bed, and ruined my pillows."
Darius went pale. He knew exactly who that was.
"And...?" Darius whispered. "What happened to this... visitor?"
I stopped eating. I looked up and locked eyes with him.
I let the silence hang there for a long, uncomfortable five seconds. I didn't frown. I didn't glare. I just gave him a small, confused smile.
"I don't know," I lied smoothly.
Darius blinked. "You... don't know?"
"Yeah. It was weird," I shrugged. "The lights were out. I heard him scream—something about shadows eating him? I don't know, he sounded delirious. Then there was this wet crunching sound, and when I turned on the lamp... poof."
I made a gesture with my hand like a magician revealing a trick.
"Gone," I said. "Not even a bloodstain. He must have been very embarrassed about ruining my pillows, so he left in a hurry. Did you know him, Darius? Maybe you can tell him he owes me twenty gold coins for the linen."
Darius was trembling.
He wasn't trembling because I threatened him. He was trembling because of what I didn't say.
In his mind, he was running the calculations: The Shadow Stalker is gone? Without a trace? Did Valerius kill him? How? Does he have a guardian beast? Or is Valerius...
"I..." Darius stammered. "I do not know such a person. It must have been a thief."
"Right. A thief," I nodded, going back to my eggs. "A thief who breaks into the poorest Prince's room. Makes total sense."
I took a sip of orange juice.
"Anyway," I said, my voice dropping an octave, becoming just a little bit colder. "It's a shame he left so quickly. I was feeling... peckish."
Darius froze.
He looked at me. I looked at him.
For a split second, my shadow on the floor seemed to stretch toward him, just a few inches. It wasn't my imagination; the [Gluttony] was reacting to his fear. It smelled a snack.
Darius abruptly stood up. His chair scraped loudly against the floor.
"I have lost my appetite," he announced, his face pale. "I have... preparations for the Selection. Excuse me."
He turned and walked out of the hall fast. Too fast. He practically ran.
As soon as he was gone, the tension in the room snapped.
"Heh," the 1st Prince grunted. "You scared him, little brother."
I looked at the giant. He grinned, showing a mouth full of sharp teeth.
"Darius is a schemer," the 1st Prince said. "He fears what he cannot calculate. You... you are becoming interesting."
"I'm just eating breakfast," I said innocently.
"Eat well," the giant laughed, standing up. "You will need the energy. The Selection begins at noon. Try not to die."
He left. The 2nd Princess gave me a bored look and vanished in a swarm of bats.
Finally alone, I slumped in my chair.
"Phew."
My hands were shaking slightly under the table. That was terrifying. Darius was a high-level mage. If he had attacked me right there, I would have had to teleport away and run for my life.
"Gaslighting successful," I whispered.
I checked my pocket. I had the assassin's dagger hidden there. I could sell it later for good money.
But first, the Selection.
This was the main event. In the novel, this is where the Emperor chooses which Prince gets to lead the invasion of the Human Kingdom. The original Valerius wasn't even considered.
But I didn't want to invade the Human Kingdom. That sounded like a lot of cardio.
I needed to find a way to participate, show off just enough power to keep people away from me, but lose the contest so I didn't have to go to war.
"Calculated mediocrity," I decided. "That is the goal."
I finished my toast.
"Time to go fail specifically in second place."