Chapter 41: Losing the Grip over My Humanity
The night was calm like the stillness of a forgotten and untouched lake.
Tall trees swayed under the breeze, their leaves and branches rustling, creating a peaceful ambience.
'Where am I…?' I asked myself.
I looked around, preparing myself to be attacked without a moment's notice.
Abandoned buildings were near me—they were all filled with moss, plants and strange flowers.
I was standing on fractured concrete, tall grass sprouting from its cracks.
The atmosphere inside the place seemed familiar, awfully so…
It was so familiar that I actually wondered if I had ever stayed inside a place like this. I wanted to use Intra, to try and pry inside the realm of my memories, but I didn't have time.
Intra's activation period was long, lasting over 30 minutes.
I then started to recall what had happened before I entered the place.
'I was fighting the Multi-Faced creature, and then that weird bubble rushed over me, covering me wholly…'
'This may be the ability of the One-Eyed One.'
I stared at the sky.
The full moon hung high above the heavens, floating seamlessly around earth. Its rays shone on the world, bringing cascades of gentle light over the pitch-black ambience.
Owls flew gently, their wings as silent as the calmness of the night.
Near me, rabbits slept peacefully, awaiting a day that would never come.
On a close mountain, wolves who had just eaten their prey, vehemently howled, the echoes of their prayers resounding inside the darkened world.
I felt…strange.
The world in front of me was completely different…
But somehow, I still felt inside Mnemosyne's Antiques.
It was as if my body was stuck between the shop and the new dimension—like a limbo of some sort.
The agony that tormented my Fragment was also greatly diminished.
In the real world, I felt like I was drowning under its pressure the whole time. But now it was as if I could take nourishing deep breaths, easing the pressure I felt within.
Yet my ability hadn't stopped working.
I could still feel the connection within me and the white-haired girl's movements, to the point where I could try to mimic them even right now.
I was eager to try, but I couldn't.
I had to find a way to leave first.
At a sudden hypothesis, my heart dropped.
And with it, the calmer demeanor I possessed washed away from my body.
…Was this the world after the Moon God's descent?
Was this a broken future, the only remaining thing after His arrival…?
My heart pounded at the thought of it…but I felt this wasn't the right theory.
My instincts told me I was still inside Mnemosyne's Antiques, prompting me to think that it was either a different dimension, or an illusion created by the One-Eyed One.
I did my reality-check, yet nothing was off, leading me to think that my mind wasn't inside a dream either.
As I didn't have any reality-checks aiding me into figuring if the world truly was an illusion, I just had to deal with the uncertainties.
Since the reality-check I knew was founded on my non-awareness and to the dream's failure to act as logic imposed, it wouldn't work right now, as my mind was completely awake.
I gazed at the sky again.
'The Moon, the residence of Sin.'
I wondered what was the connection between Him and the white-haired girl, yet I didn't possess any clues.
I wondered why she sought for my death in such a strange, ferocious manner, and also why she was inside Mnemosyne's Antiques.
Was this a trap?
Did Franz Kaldiri betray me and Casanova's trust?
It didn't seem right.
Although I didn't know him well, my kind of current apathy led me to hypothesize that it wasn't the case.
Had my emotions been more heightened and my fear been more prevalent, I would've probably thought differently.
But even then, it was strange.
How did she know I would enter Mnemosyne's Antiques? How many people even knew I would enter it?
The first was Casanova—the second was Franz; while the last one…
My pupils constricted.
…The last one was the girl who responded when I called Mnemosyne's Antiques.
"Selene…" I muttered under my breath. "So it's her."
I finally understood the reasons for her uncanny behavior on the other end of the line. One thing I was completely unaware of, was why she regarded me with such contempt.
I've always been someone quiet, someone who always avoided creating any sort of dramas.
Because of this it was inconceivable to think that I would evoke such hatred from someone else.
Yet…
Were her reasons really important?
She wanted to kill me, and it really was the only thing that mattered to me. Because of this, I was ready to respond accordingly.
Selene already knew my first and last name—it wouldn't be long before she would come to know about Kathy too.
I simply couldn't let that happen.
I vowed to Mother that I would never fail in my quest to protect her.
I started to walk aimlessly in this new dimension.
The enchanting light the moon emitted created paths amidst the chaos of the world I was thrown into, prompting me to follow it.
Since I didn't know if the shadows had otherworldly creatures hiding inside them, I figured it would be best to keep away from them.
After all, this was an attack thrown by the One-Eyed One.
…Even if I still didn't understand the offensive part of it.
"Could the Multi-Faced have thought that I was a nuisance to His plans, prompting it to banish me inside this place?" I said out loud.
"…Wouldn't it be best to just kill me?"
"That is unless…"
I took a deep breath.
"…Unless it's aware of Genesis and its inner workings."
If the Multi-Faced being knew that if I died or received serious injuries in the future, Genesis would activate and show me the dangers, allowing me to escape them narrowly.
It wasn't inconceivable to think that sending me off to a different dimension would be the best option.
That way, He could descend without any further troubles.
However, it might've still been an illusion.
In that case…
If my real body still resided inside Mnemosyne's Antiques while my mind or soul was inside this place, I would be as good as dead.
There really wasn't any other option.
No soulless and mindless husk can protect itself, after all.
But.
'If that theory is correct I should be dead already—my consciousness would have also disappeared.'
This led me to believe that this wasn't just an illusion cast by the One-Eyed One.
"Hello…?" a voice called out from the darkness beyond.
My eyes narrowed and my silvery pupils constricted.
'So this is where the offensive part of his attack may come.' I thought, preparing myself.
As I clutched the handle of my sword, I responded to the voice.
"Show yourself." I tersely asked, my voice hoarse.
"H-Hey man, no need for all that hostility…!" the voice replied.
Soon after, an adult male, ranging from 1.75 meters to 1.80 meters tall left the shadows, the bright moonlight gradually revealing his features.
He had short, black hair and black eyes. His face lacked any distinctive features—he really was the epitome of plainness. He wore a dark-blue suit, resembling those of office workers.
As soon as he saw my weapon, he raised his hands defensively.
"A sword…? Why's there blood on it…!"
"Who are you?" I repeated myself.
This was a completely different world. There shouldn't be any possible way for him to enter it.
This was sketchy, too suspicious for my liking.
I sighed internally, glad to have my thoughts unbounded by fear or my usual sense of paranoia.
Had I not possessed it, I would've surely died. Even with Genesis, faring off would've been impossible.
"I'm Ivan Sestili, c-can you put the sword down…?" he quickly replied, trembling in fear.
"…How did you enter inside this place?" I ignored his pleas.
"Some moments after I stepped foot inside this antique shop, a bubble covered me and I found myself inside this place…I swear!"
'I was too focused on the Multi-Faced being to notice his presence…His words might prove to be true.'
'But this could mean he has seen me, Selene, and the Multi-Faced being.'
'This is not good.'
'If he's a normal human, he might come to learn about our identities.'
The air then grew overwhelming.
A primal voice—a primal urge for one's self survival shot from the pits of my soul. It caressed my neck gently, whispering the shortest way for mine and Kathy's safety.
"Kill him."
"Disposing of his corpse inside this dimension is a child's play."
"It will be as if he had never existed."
I would be a liar if I said I wasn't considering it.
Yet what if this subconscious urge too, was an attack belonging to The One-Eyed one—a means for me to submit to his and the Moon God Sin's will?
"What if he reports about your abilities to the authorities, exposing your secrets?"
"What if they experiment on your body?"
"What if they find Kathy and subject her to the same treatment?"
"You vowed to Mother. Were your words only a falsehood, a gentle lie that would make her not worry anymore?"
'Shut up.' I silenced the urge.
"How did the interior of the store look?" I asked.
His eyes widened. He pointed at me, his hand trembling.
"Y-You…You were fighting that creature…!"
My eyes narrowed.
I found myself staring into his eyes, wondering of just how much it would take to cut him down.
I could rush there and slit his throat—it really was that easy.
And so I stepped forward, blade in hand, a smile almost forming on my face…?
I abruptly stopped my body, almost failing to do so. With it my train of thoughts, my mudslide towards slaughter did the same.
Slowly, my apathy was beginning to fade.
…What was happening to me?
He could've just been a normal person, so why did I feel this thirst, this unexplainable need to cut his life short?
I didn't even have any proof he would expose me to the world!
Not even weeks ago I was debating whether Nephilim killing each other was right—what the hell was happening to me?
Was I starting to change?
Was I starting to resemble those Nephilim I so feared?
My breath quickened as terror gripped me.
I was afraid to become a monster…one who would slaughter innocents for its own benefit.
Even more so, I was afraid to become one while retaining every single inch of awareness towards my actions.
What if Kathy saw me in this state?
What if Mother saw me in this way?
Was she watching me, even right now?
I looked at the sky, almost afraid to see her distraught face staring back at me. But the firmament was lonely, awfully so.
Only the full moon was present.
I squinted.
'Is it just my imagination, or is the moon closer than before?'
"Is everything alright?" Ivan asked.
"…Yes." I replied quickly after.
"Why were you fighting with that monster? Does it have to do something with our situation?" he asked.
"Yes." I answered.
I figured it was better for him not to know every detail. Lying in such a situation would do more harm than good. It was smarter to keep the truth brief, however.
"I-I see." he replied, looking down.
"Follow me, let's try to leave this place together." I replied almost absentmindedly.
I myself wasn't even fully sure why I decided to keep him near.
I guess that—by staying close to a human—I hoped I would retain more and more of my humanity, distancing myself from the Nephilim and their ways.
"Yes…!"
Just as Ivan rushed towards me, I shouted for him to stop.
I couldn't let him follow me so closely, I had to protect my safety too.
Since I also couldn't let my back be exposed to him, I told us to switch places—he would walk in front while I stayed behind him, keeping a distance of about ten meters to be sure.
…
There was no sound inside the darkened world, only the occasional chirping of birds and crickets and the howling of wolves.
The abandoned buildings stood tall, bounded by nature's chains.
This city seemed to not have an end.
"So, what's your name?" he asked.
"…Yves Santis." I replied after a few seconds.
My response was late—too late.
My mind was slowing down, returning to how it was before my awakening. My apathy and calm-mindedness were also greatly reduced.
This led me to hypothesize that it was because of the mental distress I'd experienced earlier—the fear of losing myself.
"…You're a kind of monster hunter?"
My eyes twitched as I stifled a sigh, almost a chuckle too.
"The situation couldn't be more different than how you just said."
"I see." he sighed, seemingly disappointed.
"But aren't you too young to—you know, risk your life by fighting that thing?" he followed quick after.
"I had no choice." I replied.
His constant chatter didn't bother me. It made me feel more relaxed. It brought normalcy back into mind, allowing me to feel more human.
I intended to check the time with my phone, but it was completely dead, the screen was fully black.
As it might've been an effect of the unknown dimension, I brushed it off.
"The creature you fought seemed to be stronger than you—why did you keep fighting a losing battle?"
'How much time did he spend on watching us…?'
I suddenly understood.
Something wasn't right.
There was no way he could watch the Multi-Faced being without having his mind face any repercussions.
I myself, a Nephilim who had just fully awakened his powers faced great difficulty in doing so—there was no way a human could look without any problems.
And most importantly, as Casanova said, humans would avoid any places with supernatural events occurring subconsciously with their sixth sense, allowing them to escape the situations where death ran rampant!
How did I not think of these things before?
Just then, I felt something like dust—a particle-like, gold-filled powder shower over me.
Ivan slowly turned around, his face marked by a maniacal, sharp-teethed grin.
In his hands there was a grey scepter, otherworldly patterns marked onto it.
Those patterns…
I had read them before!
They belonged to the Sult'Hurni, the Moon People—the followers of the Moon Good Si—
Suddenly, my body engulfed in flames.
And with it, surges of infinite pain crashed upon me.
As my agonized shrieks resounded inside the darkened world, as my flesh and skin blistered and split open, as every breath prolonged my torment, smoke entering my lungs, burning my esophagus down to my chest, he spoke.
"How could you try to undermine His descent? How could you try to deceive and fight against Divinity itself?!" he looked at my burning body with scorn.
"You cannot stop what has been prophesied eons before your birth."
"He will return…He will bring us all back to life."
"We shall rule on Earth like we did inside the ancient Loranne…!"