Chapter 139: Beating Kaido!
"Bad Wind!!!"
The roar tore through the atmosphere, a guttural sound that seemed to originate not from a living throat, but from the bowels of a prehistoric volcano erupting.
Kaido, in his colossal Azure Dragon form, hovered in the darkened sky like a deity of destruction. He opened his massive maw wide, the interior glowing with an ominous green light.
From the depths of his throat, a terrifying energy gathered, compressing the air until it shrieked in protest, creating a vacuum that pulled at the clothes of everyone in the plaza.
WHOOSH! WHOOSH! WHOOSH!
It began.
Tens of thousands of violent wind blades, solidified like substance and glowing with a sickly emerald hue, erupted from his mouth. They didn't just fly; they screamed. They gathered into a terrifying storm, a cyclone of cutting edges that swept across the sky and earth towards the towering Wooden Golem standing defiantly in the plaza.
The sound was unbearable—a billion banshees wailing at once.
Wherever the wind blades passed, the air was torn asunder, emitting a piercing, high-pitched whistle that forced the spectators—even the seasoned Underworld Emperors—to cover their ears and crouch in pain. The atmospheric pressure dropped so sharply that noses began to bleed.
The ground, made of hardened biscuit and caramel cement—a material tougher than concrete—was sliced open instantly. It wasn't just cut; it was obliterated. Deep, jagged ravines stretched for hundreds of meters, looking like scars on the face of the island itself.
Swish swish swish swish...!
The dense cutting sound was like the most terrifying slow slicing torture in the world.
Countless wind blades fiercely struck the Wooden Golem's body. It was a barrage of invisible swords, relentless and infinite.
Crack! Snap! Thud!
The massive wooden entity groaned under the assault. Its bark-like armor, which had withstood cannon fire, was shredded into sawdust. Huge chunks of wood, some as large as houses, were sliced off its torso and limbs. They were sent flying across the sky like a rain of splintered debris, crashing into the surrounding candy towers and demolishing them.
"Ugh, gurgle gurgle gurgle..."
Seeing his attack finally take effect, seeing the "monster" created by the human crumble under his might, Kaido's ferocious dragon face curved into a cruel, satisfied smile.
A victorious laugh bubbled up from his throat, shaking his massive chest and rattling the bones of those below.
"See?! DO YOU SEE?!" Kaido roared, his ego finally finding purchase. "No matter what strange tricks you use, wood is just wood! It breaks before the might of a dragon! I am the strongest!"
However, his laughter only came out halfway.
Then... it got stuck in his throat, choking him like a fishbone.
Kaido's eyes widened. His pupils, usually slit and terrifying, contracted into pinpricks of pure, unadulterated disbelief.
Because he watched with his own eyes as the Wooden Golem, which had just been covered in countless hideous wounds, missing huge chunks of its torso and left arm, began to change.
Creaaaak... Crackle... Squelch...
Amidst a grating, organic growing sound that echoed like bones knitting together or ancient trees stretching their roots, the wood moved.
The parts that had been cut off didn't just stay gone. As if possessing a life, a will, and a soul of their own, countless new woody fibers surged forth from the wounds. They intertwined, twisted, and grew rapidly, filling the gaps with terrifying speed. Green buds sprouted and matured into hardened timber in milliseconds.
It was like watching a time-lapse video of a rainforest growing, but accelerated a million times over.
In just a few breaths—less than five seconds—the giant Wooden Golem returned to its original, pristine state. The massive wooden dragon that curled around its neck was reformed, its wooden scales glistening. Its face was smooth again, stoic and immovable.
It stood there, completely unharmed, as if the terrifying storm that had just shredded the landscape had only given it a minor itch.
Kaido's smile froze on his face. It looked almost comical, a mask of horror painted on a dragon.
"Wh-what kind of monstrous recovery is this?"
On the sidelines, Charlotte Katakuri, the stoic Sweet Commander known for his calm, finally lost his composure. He gripped his trident, Mogura, so hard his knuckles turned white. He was shouting in a lost voice that betrayed his shock.
"It's not just regeneration!" Katakuri analyzed, his Future Sight flickering wildly because it couldn't predict this biological anomaly. "My Haki sees it... the wood isn't just repairing itself; it's feeding on the energy around it! Such astonishing destructive power, and it also comes with this almost immortal regeneration ability?"
Katakuri took a step back, sweat beading on his forehead.
"Wood shouldn't behave like this! Even Logia types have a limit to their reformation! What kind of Devil Fruit is this? Could it be... has he awakened the powers of a Mythical Zoan: Model Forest God or something similar?!"
"I don't believe it...!!!"
Kaido was completely insane now. The logic of the battle had shattered his worldview.
His huge dragon eyes were bloodshot, capillaries bursting from the internal pressure. All his reason, all his tactical experience as a warrior of the seas who had fought Roger and Whitebeard, was swallowed by an endless, burning fury.
He would never accept it!
He, a dignified Sea Emperor! One of the Four Emperors who ruled the New World! The man known as the Strongest Creature who sought a glorious death because nothing could kill him!
He was actually being forced into such a pathetic state? By a "newcomer"? In such a playful manner?
"I AM KAIDO!!!"
He roared, his voice shaking the very clouds in the sky, dispersing the natural clouds and replacing them with his own ominous storm.
"Ascending Dragon: Flame Eight Trigrams!"
Kaido's massive dragon body began to glow.
FWOOSH!
Intense heat radiated from his scales, turning the surrounding air into a shimmering mirage. The temperature in the plaza spiked by hundreds of degrees instantly. The chocolate river boiled. The biscuit ground began to melt into sticky goo.
He spiraled upwards, engulfed in blazing flames that were hotter than magma.
ZZZTTT!
Intertwined with the fire were thick arcs of black and red Conqueror's Haki lightning. The combination transformed him into a living, flaming meteor that threatened to incinerate the heavens and annihilate the earth.
He charged fiercely towards Hashirama with an unstoppable momentum, aiming to vaporize the wooden giant entirely with sheer thermal energy.
"BURN TO ASHES!"
This strike was his ultimate collision. It integrated his immense weight, his supersonic speed, his dragon flames, and his supreme Haki into one singular point of destruction.
However, facing this world-destroying attack, Hashirama Senju stood atop the Wooden Golem's head with his arms crossed.
His red armor clinked softly in the wind. His expression showed no ripple of emotion. His eyes, marked with the pigmentation of Sage Mode, were calm and clear like a still lake reflecting a forest fire.
In his mind, Hashirama felt a strange sense of nostalgia.
This feeling... Hashirama thought, watching the flaming dragon approach. It reminds me of the Kyubi (Nine-Tails). Wild. Destructive. Full of hatred. But compared to Madara's control over the beast... this dragon is just throwing a tantrum.
"Impressive spirit," Hashirama murmured aloud, sounding more like an elder watching a spirited youth than a warrior facing death.
He merely clapped his hands together again.
Clap.
The sound was soft, but the result was earth-shattering.
The next second, the giant Wooden Golem beneath his feet—a construct hundreds of meters tall—moved.
It didn't brace for impact. It didn't put up a shield.
It ran.
With heavy, thundering steps that left huge footprints in the melting biscuit ground, causing the entire Cake Island to tremble and tectonic plates to groan, the Golem actively ran towards that flaming meteor!
"Is he suicidal?!" Stussy screamed from behind a shield of CP0 agents. "He's running into the magma!"
Just as the "flaming meteor" was about to collide with the wooden giant—a collision that would surely destroy the island and everyone on it—something impossible happened.
The giant Wooden Golem, with a grotesque and agile posture completely unsuited to its colossal size, suddenly sidestepped!
It was a martial arts move. A perfect, fluid dodge. Executed by a mountain of wood.
Whoosh!
Kaido's massive dragon body, carrying world-destroying power and blinding speed, brushed past the Wooden Golem by mere meters. The heat singed the wood, turning parts of it black, but the impact missed entirely.
"Now!"
Hashirama's eyes flashed with the focus of the God of Shinobi.
The Wooden Golem's two arms, thicker than trains and harder than steel, shot out like lightning.
Bam!
They instantly grabbed the middle section of Kaido's hundred-meter-long dragon body! The wooden fingers dug deep into the dragon scales, crushing them.
"GOT YOU!"
Sizzle...!!!
Because Kaido's forward momentum was too terrifying, after the Wooden Golem grabbed him, the inertia dragged the golem forward. Its huge wooden feet ploughed two deep, charred ravines into the biscuit ground, sliding for hundreds of meters. Dust, caramel shards, and molten chocolate flew into the air.
But it didn't let go.
The Golem planted its feet. It stopped the charge. The momentum died.
Then, a scene that made everyone's eyes almost pop out of their sockets occurred. A scene that would be etched into the history of the pirate era forever.
The giant Wooden Golem, with both hands tightly gripping the midsection of the struggling, roaring Azure Dragon, exerted force.
To the left!
It swung the massive, screaming dragon up into the air, creating a grand arc!
And slammed him down!
BOOM...!!!
The ground shattered. A shockwave of dust erupted, looking like a nuclear test site.
To the right!
It swung him up again!
And slammed him down again!
BOOM...!!!
It... it actually treated "Beast" Kaido's massive divine dragon body as a long whip! A leather toy! A ragdoll!
"Thump!" "Thump!" "Thump!"
The Wooden Golem, expressionlessly following Hashirama's will, repeatedly slammed this "dragon whip" fiercely onto the ground, alternating sides like a rhythmic, brutal beatdown.
Left. SMASH.
Right. SMASH.
Left. SMASH.
Each impact was like a heavy bomb exploding in the center of the island.
The ground cracked wildly, fissures spreading out like shattered glass for miles. Shockwaves sent countless buildings flying, turning the beautiful architecture of Whole Cake Chateau into rubble. The Homies screamed and withered as the shockwaves disrupted their souls.
Amidst the deafening roar of impacts, there was a sickening sound that made the stomach turn.
Krkkk... Snap... Grind...
The sound of dragon scales—reputed to be indestructible, harder than diamond—grinding and shattering against the hard ground.
And... Kaido's voice.
"RAAAH! DAMN... GAH! STOP!"
His muffled groans gradually turned from rage to pain, and finally to sheer, unadulterated humiliation!
He was being manhandled. He wasn't being fought with dignity; he was being thrashed like an unruly pet snake by a master who had had enough.
And in this absurd spectacle, which could be described as "gods beating up mortals," Hashirama stood atop the Wooden Golem's head.
He wasn't gloating. He wasn't sneering. He wasn't even out of breath.
He clasped his hands together, a compassionate, almost teacher-like expression on his face. He looked down at the dragon being slammed below him with pity.
"Alas, Mr. Kaido!" Hashirama shouted over the noise, his voice amplified by chakra. "Your power is truly too great! This is truly too dangerous for the children!"
His voice clearly spread throughout the venue, carrying a sense of helplessness and benevolence. It sounded like he was scolding a student who ran in the halls with scissors.
"And you, so powerful, yet so short-tempered! Attacking your friends? Ruining the party? Destroying the cake?"
SLAM!
"This is not right! You must correct yourself in the future! Violence is not the answer to everything! You need to learn some manners!"
As his voice fell, Hashirama's eyes narrowed slightly.
"Time for a timeout."
The Wooden Golem suddenly jumped on the spot.
It raised its hands high above its head, holding the now somewhat listless "dragon whip" aloft against the sun. Kaido dangled there, dizzy, bleeding, and confused.
And with all its might, utilizing gravity, centrifugal force, and the full weight of the Sage Art, it slammed Kaido fiercely down towards the center of the huge spiderweb-like cracks already made in the ground below!
"STAY DOWN!"
BOOM... RUMBLE...!!!
The world seemed to mute at the moment of impact. The vibration was so intense that sound couldn't catch up immediately.
Then, the sound came.
A cataclysmic explosion rocked the island. Huge dust clouds and rubble shockwaves spread like a tsunami in all directions, shattering windows miles away and knocking the weaker pirates off their feet. The shockwave blew the hats off the Big Mom Pirates and sent tables flying.
However, no one in the entire audience dodged. No one made a sound.
They were paralyzed by awe.
Everyone's gaze—from the terrified Morgans to the calculating Stussy, to the stunned Big Mom—was fixed on the center of the ruins, which had been smashed into a doomsday-like crater.
One second.
Two seconds.
Three seconds...
Dead silence.
Dust permeated the air, thick and gray. The life force in that area seemed to have been completely erased.
"No... no way?"
Perospero, the eldest son of the Charlotte Family, licked his dry lips. His candy cane staff shook in his hand. His voice trembled as he uttered the absurd thought in everyone's mind.
"'Yonko' Kaido... just like that... by a newcomer...?"
The word "defeated" stuck in his throat. He simply couldn't say it.
Because it wasn't just defeat. It was a beatdown. It was an overwhelming, one-sided violation. It was an adult educating a naughty child, a brutal thrashing devoid of the dignity usually afforded to a duel between Emperors.
"Hmph."
Not far away, Uchiha Madara stood with his arms crossed. The wind from the impact whipped his spiky black hair around his face.
A barely perceptible curve formed on his arrogant lips. His Sharingan faded, replaced by his normal dark eyes. He looked at Hashirama with a mix of annoyance and pride.
"Now that's more like it," Madara muttered to himself, loud enough for Suzaku to hear. "At least he didn't disgrace our ninja name. If he struggled against a mere lizard, I would have been embarrassed to call him my rival."
Meanwhile, the Underworld Emperors—Morgans, Stussy, Du Feld—who were observing this battle from their hiding spots, were completely stunned. Their mouths hung open, their expensive cigars falling to the floor unnoticed.
The shock in their hearts was simply inexpressible in words!
Is he dead?
Did the Strongest Creature just die?
Was an era about to end in such a comical yet shocking way?
Morgans frantically snapped photos of the crater, his hands shaking so hard the images were blurry. "This... this is the end of the Yonko system! The balance is broken!"
Just as everyone's hearts were in their throats, waiting for the dust to settle...
"D-damn it..."
A low growl vibrated the ground.
"AHHHHHHH...!!!"
A roar, mixed with intense pain, physical weakness, yet still filled with endless, undying malice, exploded from the center of the dust cloud!
The beast was not dead. But the beast was undeniably hurt, and for the first time in decades... afraid.
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