23. If it were Arwin, I might want to touch him once
The mansion was busy. It was because of the preparations for Arwin's engagement ceremony.
Although he said he would think about it, the engagement preparations were proceeding according to the set procedure. Perhaps he said he would reconsider the engagement just to comfort me briefly.
Whatever Arwin's true intention was, I was his maid and couldn't object to preparing his engagement ceremony.
The fact that the man I loved was becoming another woman's was sad and even desperate, but I didn't cry. I had already cried enough to vomit. My broken tear ducts were scheduled to be dry for a while.
Arwin was busy regardless of the engagement preparations.
He was always buried in documents unknown to me. How late did he look at documents yesterday? He couldn't come out of his room even when it became afternoon.
The head maid ordered me to wake the master with warm tea. I was still his maid and couldn't object to the head maid's words either. No, I had no intention of objecting even a little.
I arrived in front of his room with steaming warm tea. Grabbing the doorknob and turning it gently, the door opened soundlessly.
Entering the room, I looked toward the bed where Arwin would be lying. Arwin, who must have overworked himself last night, existed on the bed. And surprisingly, there was another guest besides me in Arwin's room first.
An unexpected person was standing vacantly in front of the bed, looking down at Arwin.
"...Dalton?"
Perhaps because I called in a small voice, Dalton's head, facing Arwin, didn't turn toward me.
Dalton was carefully stroking near Arwin's heart with his pale white fingertips. What is he doing?
Since what I saw was only Dalton's back, I couldn't know with what face he was stroking near Arwin's chest. I felt ominous for no reason.
Placing the teacup I brought on the table, I walked toward the bed. As I approached close enough to see Dalton's face, only then did his head start turning slowly toward me.
It turned so slowly that I felt time flowing slowly. Soon our eyes met. His odd eyes, which always shone beautifully, were strangely relaxed.
"Dalton?"
I called his name again.
Dalton distorted his lips and smiled a faint smile. It was a smile I had always seen, but today, that smile felt only unnatural.
The anxiety that struck me without reason grew bigger and bigger. My heart began to beat fast, making a dry sound.
Dalton lifted his index finger, which had been stroking near Arwin's chest, and placed it lightly on his lips.
"Shh."
He spoke as if spitting out language containing incantatory meaning. Then, like being under a spell, I couldn't say anything for a moment.
Dalton added one more word without lowering his index finger placed on his lips.
"Quietly. He will wake up."
I answered him in a tiny voice.
"I came to wake Arwin up though?"
It was a direct remark, making the feeling that I wouldn't be able to say anything feel meaningless.
Dalton let out a scoff. My answer must have been absurd.
I looked at Arwin's face lying on the bed. With his eyes closed, he was making even breathing sounds. His lips, slightly parted, were pale in color.
Watching him like that continuously, I didn't just want to wake him up. His face, gaunter than yesterday, was pitiable.
Do nobles with high status have so much work that they overwork their bodies?
I wanted to stroke his haggard cheek. Just as I stroked his face that hot last night.
"Can you hear Arwin's heartbeat?"
Dalton, who told me to be quiet, spoke in a louder voice than me. I naturally listened closely. To hear Arwin's heartbeat.
Although I listened closely for quite a while like that, Arwin's heartbeat was not heard. Only quiet silence was heard.
I recalled the past memory of hearing Arwin's heartbeat. The sound of two hearts beating to scatter hot blood. That heartbeat stronger than anyone else's.
Although it was strongly engraved in my mind too, regrettably, it wasn't heard at all now. I shook my head left and right with a face full of regret.
Dalton looked at Arwin's chest area he had stroked with his fingertips and said.
"A tired sound comes from Arwin's heart."
"...."
"He must have overworked himself until late yesterday."
Why can Dalton hear Arwin's heartbeat which I can't hear?
I concentrated all my nerves on my ears again, but as expected, all I could hear was Arwin's breathing. It was a strange thing.
I gave up on listening to Arwin's heartbeat. There was no need to hang myself on something that couldn't be heard.
"Dalton. Just what were you doing here?"
The image of Dalton observing Arwin closely while stroking his chest area was vivid before my eyes.
Dalton's strangely relaxed eyes. The anxiety felt without reason. Those things were not very pleasant.
"I came to check on Arwin, but he was sleeping so soundly that I couldn't bear to wake him and was just watching."
"You touched him too."
"I was curious what sound came from his heart."
I looked at him with half-closed eyes.
"I am really not a pervert!"
"Did anyone say you were a pervert?"
"Your eyes were looking at me like that!"
"How?"
"Like some perverted guy secretly touching a sleeping handsome man's body...."
Damn it, Dalton said up to there and showed a face full of dismay.
"Why does the flow of conversation seem familiar?"
"You treated me as a pervert twice."
He repeated that it was unfair. However, since I really never treated him as a pervert, I didn't comfort him.
The reason I looked at him askance was like this.
Because a doubt arose whether it was really true that Dalton touched Arwin's chest just because of 'sound'. Because I wondered if Dalton also knew about the two hearts Arwin possessed.
Arwin had two hearts, and Dalton loves his dead lover. Dalton wants to save his dead lover, but he cannot interfere with human life and death.
'I don't want her to rot. But there is one place even I can't prevent decay.'
'Where is that?'
'The heart.'
That was the conversation Dalton and I shared the other day.
Surely, does Dalton want one of the two hearts Arwin possesses?
Of course, it might be a far-fetched guess. But from a very long time ago, I had received such feelings, or premonitions, several times.
The strange thing was that when I asked him if he wanted Arwin's heart, he answered 'No'.
Dalton was a person who really couldn't lie, and I felt no trace of falsehood from him at that time.
Arwin with two hearts and Dalton needing a living heart. It felt like one important connecting point was missing. What that is, as of now, I couldn't know.
"By the way."
While I was thinking various thoughts with a serious face, Dalton spoke to me again.
"If it were Arwin, I might want to touch him once. No, is it just wanting to touch? I also want to dig through the soft flesh and see what's inside."
I also want to see what's inside. I repeated those words.
"Do you want to see Arwin's heart?"
Dalton smiled broadly.
"It would be good if I could see that too. I wasn't talking only about the heart."
"Hmm. Why did such a feeling arise?"
"How should I say. He is very sexy. So I don't know if such a desire arises because of that. Of course, it doesn't mean I like Arwin sexually."
Dalton stuck out his red tongue with a playful expression. He seemed to say it playfully, but to me, it didn't feel that playful.
"...Dalton Racers. I didn't know you thought of me in that way."
At that moment, another voice intervened between us. It was an ecstatic voice that made ears perk up automatically.
Despite just waking up, how can the voice be this good?
"...! A, Arwin?"
Dalton called Arwin's name in a startled voice. Then, Arwin's eyelids, which had been asleep as if never to wake up forever, rose slowly.
Arwin's eyes, blacker than yesterday, looked at me and Dalton alternately.
Since when was he awake?
"I don't wish for someone I don't know well to dig through my flesh."
"Arwin. That's a misunderstanding."
Whether Dalton was flustered, he raised his two hands and waved them repeatedly. Arwin stared at Dalton with half-closed eyes and completely raised his body which had been lying down.
"Furthermore, I think I would hate it a bit if you touch my skin."
"A, Arwin! I said it's not like that."
Dalton was appalled, but Arwin didn't listen to his excuse even a little.
Arwin's gaze directed at Dalton resembled exactly the gaze I gave Dalton a moment ago. That gaze treating Dalton as a pervert.
Dalton, fully feeling that gaze, placed his hand on his forehead and let out a long sigh.
"My goodness."
I murmured small like talking to myself.
"Pervert indeed."
"I am not!"
Dalton flared up greatly. His face was dyed red like a volcano about to explode soon. If I tease him more, he might really explode in the end.
Arwin passed such a Dalton lightly and picked up the teacup I had placed on the table. He drank a sip of tea with elegant hand gestures.
His white face drained of blood, slightly disheveled hair, and noticeably bobbing Adam's apple looked excessively sexy.
Enough not to be able to raise an objection to Dalton thinking he was sexy.
"Tastes good."
"Marquis. If you woke up because I was noisy, I apologize."
I laid out words any maid would likely say.
Arwin looked at Dalton instead of answering. That gaze seemed to say he woke up because Dalton chatted noisily.
Whether I wasn't the only one feeling so, Dalton shouted with a renewed unfair face.
"Good grief! Forget it, I'm leaving."
Dalton walked to the door thumping as if angry. Before opening the door, he added one last word.
"Don't try to stop me later because you feel sorry belatedly. Because I am totally annoyed right now."
Bang.
Dalton closed the door hard enough to shake it and left. Arwin and I faced each other as if promised.
"Are you going to stop him?"
Arwin shook his head. Then he even answered kindly.
"No, not at all."
Arwin seemed to have not a speck of intention to stop Dalton. I giggled inadvertently. Even if the situation is funny, it couldn't be this funny.
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