Dear mother
Sorry i was not able to be elaborate yesterday. Before i met her yesterday, I could not even describe you the anxiety i had. My head was creating scenarios which will never come true. When you told me love is magical, I never thought it would bring so much emotions out. We went to the park for shooting the short film. I was able to make up a short story about Climate change. I still did not have a role for her. She asked me what was her role. In panic I told her, she was the lead. Now i dont even know what to do. She read my hurried script and told me it was amazing. I was surprised because none of the others liked it. I am writing a new one. But the most important thing was what happened. when she sat on the grass near the Autumn leaves and started to dring water. I felt a weird sensation in my heart, my eyes were hot and was fixed in her lips as she drank the water I could not stop looking at her in a creepy way, if u ask someone else.
When ever I go to sleep she comes in my dream. What ever I see, it reminds me of her. I want to be around her all the time. But things are not that easy, is it not mother. After all I am a sick person. It may not look like it from the top, but my lifestyle is too much hard for someone other than me. Its hard enough to deal with day to day challenges but now adding her on, will make her living a life in a jail. I wish u were alive mother, you would have help me through with this. I shall keep my distance for her own good, I want to end it before I make a mistake i will regret. I am saying all this because, I got an attack after a long time. I am very afraid mother my nightmares are coming back. I hope you bless me mother. Love your son.