The moment Sun Car No. 1 rumbled out of Gaojia Fort, Yiye let out a tiny, excited squeal—the kind a kid makes when they realize the adults really aren't watching.
Sunlight hit the bronze reflector plates. The gears hummed. The wooden frame vibrated with restrained power.
Gao Sanwa, gripping the sunshade levers, whispered, "Yiye-jie… this is really happening…"
Yiye puffed out her chest. "Of course! We're doing scientific research."
Sanwa blinked. "What kind of research?"
"The kind Tianzun approves of," she said, with the confidence of someone who absolutely had not asked Tianzun.
Behind them, the massive gates of Gaojia Fort slowly shrank into the distance. Fields unfurled on both sides: winter wheat, mulberry shoots, neatly arranged ridges. Farmers froze mid-hoe as the Sun Car rattled past.
And then—
"Yiye-jie!" a farmer shouted. "Who allowed you to drive the Sun Car!?"
Yiye's head didn't even twitch. "Tianzun!"
Sanwa echoed solemnly, "Tianzun!"
The farmers exchanged looks that said: Ah. Divine loophole exploitation. We see the education reforms are working.
Li Daoxuan, watching from a distant vantage point, nearly choked laughing.
Children plus power equals chaos—this was a universal truth of civilization.
But this chaos… honestly? Pretty productive.
The Sun Car sped up. Yiye pushed the steering plow forward with both hands, eyes blazing. "Sanwa—adjust the reflector! Aim for max speed!"
Sanwa yanked the sunshade rods. The bronze mirrors shifted. Solar energy surged.
The car lurched.
Yiye screamed in joy.
Sanwa screamed in terror.
A chicken in the road screamed in protest.
The car zoomed past the chicken, leaving it spinning like a top.
"Yiye-jie!" Sanwa cried. "We're too fast! We're too fast!!"
Yiye shouted back, wind whipping her hair, "Tianzun gave me this life! I'm using it!"
This was the precise moment Gaojia Village acquired its first-ever joyride scandal.
They rattled down the dirt road, bumped over a drainage ridge, crossed a footbridge (with pedestrians fleeing like ants), and shot toward the eastern orchards.
A shepherd boy stared, mouth open.
His flock stared, equally stunned.
"They're flying…" he whispered.
It wasn't true, but it wasn't exactly false either.
The Sun Car, when driven by children, gains 30% more emotional horsepower.
Meanwhile, back in the fort…
Shansier froze mid-step.
"Why do I suddenly feel… uneasy?" he muttered.
Tan Liwen, writing notes beside him, replied dryly, "Because you work in a village where every problem begins with: 'Yiye had an idea.'"
Shansier sighed. "Dear heavens… What has she done now?"
Back on the road…
Yiye had finally slowed the Sun Car.
Sanwa wiped his face. "I thought we were going to die…"
"Nonsense," Yiye said, waving him off. "You must have faith. I am Tianzun's chosen disciple of speed."
Sanwa's expression said: I don't think that's an official title…
But Yiye was already planning their next experiment.
She pointed at a long, open stretch of road. "Let's test turning speed."
Sanwa paled. "Turning speed!? We barely survived going straight!"
"It's for science."
"It's for death—!"
Too late. Yiye yanked the steering plow.
The Sun Car skidded sideways, spraying dirt in a glorious arc. Birds fled the treetops. A nearby ox collapsed in shock.
Yiye whooped like a bandit queen.
Sanwa, now halfway dead, clung to the sunshade frame.
After several high-speed turns, they finally rolled to a stop, both panting.
Sanwa slid off the bench and lay flat on the cart floor. "Yiye-jie… I can't feel my legs…"
Yiye proudly surveyed the track marks carved into the road. "Perfect. We gathered enough data. Now we return without getting caught."
Ah.
Naive.
Because at that moment, like a divine cameo entrance, Li Daoxuan appeared at the top of the ridge, hands behind his back, looking down at them with the serene expression of a man who had watched everything.
Yiye and Sanwa froze.
Li Daoxuan smiled.
The kind of smile that said: You two are definitely in trouble. But I'm also very entertained.
Yiye immediately bowed at a ninety-degree angle.
"Tianzun! This was an educational experiment!"
Sanwa echoed, trembling, "Educational! Extremely educational!"
Li Daoxuan nodded. "Indeed. Education in… loophole exploitation. And creative driving."
Yiye's eyes shone. "Does that mean… we succeeded?"
"Oh yes," Li Daoxuan said warmly. "And now Shansier will educate you both further."
From behind him, Shansier sprinted into view, already shouting their names with the despair of a man who had foreseen heart attacks in his future.
Yiye whispered, "Sanwa… run?"
Too late.
Shansier's scream echoed across the fields.
Footnotes
① Divine loopholes — Historically, peasants everywhere developed the art of "interpretive compliance," where one obeys the letter of an order while absolutely destroying its spirit. Children learn this fastest.
② Sun Car physics — Preindustrial vehicles didn't handle speed well. A donkey cart going fast was already dangerous; a solar-powered mechanical prototype driven by children? That's practically a war crime.
③ Shepherd-boy awe — Early technology often appeared supernatural to rural communities, especially anything that moved on its own. A wooden machine accelerating under sunlight would absolutely rank as "witchcraft-tier."
④ Shansier's sixth sense — Every good administrator develops a supernatural ability to detect trouble. Usually it activates when children become quiet. Yiye's version is louder.