Night had fully fallen.
The sky outside was pitch-black, and the magistrate's residence gradually quieted.
It was time to sleep.
Li Daoxuan stood where he was, unmoving, watching as Gao Yiye—her cheeks faintly flushed—quickly shrugged off her outer martial robes. In the blink of an eye, she was left in pale, moon-white undergarments.
Then—
Blink.
She dove straight under the covers.
Fast. Too fast.
So fast it completely contradicted her earlier claim of "not minding at all."
Li Daoxuan snorted inwardly.
If you truly didn't mind, why the undergarments? Why the lightning-fast retreat?
If you were really fearless, you'd boldly reveal your inner vest, move slowly, gracefully, and slip beneath the quilt like a heroine in a romance novel.
Hmph.
He very much wanted to tease her.
But Gao Yiye was thin-skinned. If he pushed too far, she might actually combust on the spot from embarrassment.
Better to let it go.
Li Daoxuan began walking toward the bed.
Slowly.
Painfully slowly.
Like a snail.
Each step he took deepened the red on Gao Yiye's cheeks.
If he had taken ten steps, her face would have been crimson enough to drip blood. Unfortunately for her, the guest room was small. From door to bed, it was barely seven steps.
Before her blush could fully bloom—
He was already standing at the bedside.
Under the quilt, Gao Yiye's heart hammered wildly.
She deliberately turned her back toward the edge of the bed, not daring to look. Still, she could clearly feel the presence behind her—solid, heavy, unyielding.
Like a mountain.
In her muddled thoughts, an uncontrollable idea surfaced:
If Dao Xuan Tianzun lies down…
If he pulls me into his arms…
Then we will truly have shared a bed.
And I will truly belong to Dao Xuan Tianzun…
"Thump."
Dao Xuan Tianzun sat down.
Gao Yiye's heart leaped straight into her throat.
And then—
Creeeak.
The wooden bedframe let out a pitiful groan.
A split second later—
CRACK!
The sound was crisp, decisive, merciless.
The bed collapsed.
Completely.
Dao Xuan Tianzun's steel bones and iron frame were simply too much for an ordinary wooden bed to bear. The entire structure gave way, sending both of them crashing to the floor in a chaotic tangle.
Quilt. Sheets. Broken wood.
Everything wrapped together in a single, disastrous heap.
The noise was thunderous.
Naturally, it drew attention.
A young maid from the magistrate's residence rushed over immediately.
"Honored guests! What happened?!"
She pushed open the door—
And froze.
There, amid shattered planks and tangled bedding, lay the county's most distinguished "married couple," wrapped together under a quilt, with only their heads poking out.
The maid's eyes widened until they were nearly round.
"Th-this… what happened here?"
Li Daoxuan sighed calmly. "The bed collapsed."
The maid's face instantly transformed into a masterpiece of silent imagination.
Her expression very clearly said:
Oh.
So this is what young people are like these days.
Just how many positions of the 'Eighteen Martial Arts' did you try to break the bed like that?
Of course, none of this could be said aloud.
She hurriedly lowered her head. "M-my apologies! Our beds are truly not sturdy enough. I'll have people come clean this up immediately. Er—this servant will withdraw for now so you may… get dressed."
In her mind, anyone wrapped in a quilt like that must surely be undressed.
With remarkable speed, she retreated and shut the door firmly behind her.
Inside, silence.
Li Daoxuan finally pushed aside the quilt and sat up, spreading his hands helplessly.
"Oh dear."
Gao Yiye scrambled free as well, hurriedly pulling her martial robes back on.
Just moments ago, her face had been crimson with embarrassment. Now the red had faded, leaving a pale flush that somehow made her look even more delicate.
She hesitated. "…Dao Xuan Tianzun… just now…"
Li Daoxuan laughed softly. "Hahaha. It's nothing. Nothing at all."
He gestured subtly toward the door, lowering his voice. "It seems this body of mine isn't very compatible with ordinary beds."
Gao Yiye's face reddened again. "…Then… maybe next time… we could find… a stone bed?"
Li Daoxuan paused.
"…Let's discuss that next time."
They stepped outside.
Seeing that both guests were fully dressed, the servants quickly moved in to clean the room, carrying away broken boards and bedding. The estate manager hurried over, bowing repeatedly and apologizing, promising to arrange another guest room immediately.
The scene became rather lively.
Just then, a servant rushed over, tugged the manager's sleeve, and whispered something in his ear.
"People from the Prince of Fu's manor have arrived," he said quietly. "They wish to see General Qin. The Magistrate is entertaining them now and cannot come over. He instructed us to ensure the honored guests are well taken care of."
The manager nodded repeatedly.
The speaker meant nothing by it.
The listener, however, did.
Li Daoxuan leaned close to Gao Yiye's ear and whispered, "People from the Prince of Fu's manor… here to see a General Qin. This likely concerns Xiaolangdi."
Gao Yiye nodded.
Li Daoxuan smiled faintly. "Looks like I'll need to deploy my miniature avatar."
Gao Yiye chuckled softly. "Dao Xuan Tianzun is going to play again."
Li Daoxuan moved to a corner, sat down, and opened the front of his robe.
On his chest was a tiny door.
He opened it.
Out stepped a miniature mechanical Dao Xuan Tianzun.
Entirely steel. Palm-sized. Its joints were crafted using Shanxi puppet techniques—durable, precise, and astonishingly flexible.
CC-01 Reconnaissance Mechanical Dao Xuan Tianzun.
The tiny figure scurried into the flower bushes, slipped through a hole in the wall, and vanished toward the neighboring courtyard.
Soon, it reached a brightly lit guest room. Armed guards stood watch outside—clearly the right place.
The miniature Tianzun hugged the wall, slipped past the guards' boots, and squeezed inside.
Candles flickered.
At the table sat Eunuch Zheng, the Magistrate of Mengjin, and a middle-aged man in armor.
Eunuch Zheng's face was dark.
"General Qin," he said stiffly, "I've come this time to ask you for a small favor."
The armored man replied smoothly, "Anything concerning the Prince of Fu's manor is my responsibility. Please speak freely."
Eunuch Zheng launched into a long, aggrieved account of the events at Xiaolangdi, ending with venom.
"That fellow surnamed Bai is utterly despicable. General Qin, I ask that you help me deal with him."
"Oh?" The Magistrate of Mengjin exclaimed in surprise. "Good Samaritan Bai? He has saved countless people in Mengjin. To the common folk, he's practically a living Buddha. Eunuch Zheng, you mustn't speak nonsense."
Eunuch Zheng snorted. "Nonsense? He is openly occupying the Prince of Fu's fief and refusing to pay rent. He is clearly in the wrong."
The magistrate's face twitched.
Though he said nothing, in his heart he cursed furiously:
When bandits occupied Xiaolangdi, did you ever collect rent?
Now that someone builds villages, resettles refugees, and solves the river bandit problem once and for all—you remember rent?
Do you even have the face to speak of right and wrong?
May your entire lineage choke on silver!
In the shadows, the miniature Dao Xuan Tianzun listened quietly.
And remembered everything.