I stood there, with the tears mixing with the rain, drip down. I always mess things up, no matter what I do. Any possible bad thing that could happen, is the most likely to happen. I started to walk, not to Yuki's house, but to anyplace but their's.
I walk and walk until I couldn't no more. My head felt light and I started to faint on the spot. I knew I was done for, no one to care for me, all pushed away. That was what I was thinking, but footsteps was approaching me.
"Akari, are you ok!"
What, who was that? It sounded like a girl's voice, but who was it? I tried to look but the fatigue and lightheadedness cause me to shut my eyes.
"Hey Akari! Akari! Come on, come on."
Right after those words, I fainted. I was in my head, words and eyes started to surround me. The feeling of guilt, isolation, hate, resentment, and fear washed over me. Fear overwhelmed me, dozens upon dozens of hands reach for me.
They all reach for me, surrounding my body in a dark haze. The other feelings vanished, but the feeling of fear overwhelmed me. I started to accept my fate, until a voice came to awake me.
"Hey Akari? Wake up! Wake up!"
I smelled a fruity scent, it smells like strawberries. I opened my eyes to see a girl face looking down at me, her lips with pink lipstick, and bubblegum pink hair.
"Good morning! How was your nap?"
"Huh?"
The girl I was laying on was someone I knew from childhood. Her name was Lily Youka, my childhood friend, we spoke from time to time, but we go to different schools. I was glad she was the person who helped me.
"Hey my little pond Lily."
"Hi my tall hotcake. How's my lap pillow?"
"Comfy, soft, and smells nice. Like strawberries."
I rose up immediately after saying that sentence. I moved away from Lily, far way after saying that. My face and her face was flushed with pink. She was flustered, but still tried to tease me.
"Aren't you red like a strawberry~"
"Says the one who's pink like bubblegum."
"Hmmph!"
After saying that Lily had a pouty face. Not long after I tried to get up but went immediately down.
"Ughh, my head."
"Be careful, you still have a fever."
"Wait, how did I get here?"
"Wellll, you were walking and I was about to say hi. But right before I could, you started to faint. I ran over there and caught you before you fell. Right after that, I called my parents to pick us up and here we are."
"Huh, still I'm glad it was you. Not my other family."
"Other family?"
I forgot that our family doesn't speak to eachother. She and her family doesn't know about my situation. I don't want to tell them though, I don't want to stress our relationship much more. Should I, or do I not?
"Don't worry about it."
"Your lying. We been friends for a long time, you still think I don't know when your lying."
I knew I couldn't lie to her, we've been friends for a very long time. We've been friends since kindergarten, our family's knew eachother before we met. So I guess you could say we been friends for a very long time.
"Ahh... your right. I'll tell you everything."
She looks with no anticipation, but curiosity. I told everything, about my situation, what I did, and how I keep screwing up everything. I was afraid about what she would say.
"Well, I knew you were pessimistic. But not to that degree. You should make up with her afterwards."
"I know, I know. Tomorrow I'll try to talk to her."
"Good. But still, I'm glad you told me about this."
Lily was the only person who would see behind my actions. Anytime someone who talk bad about me, she would stick up for me. But she always had the tendency to be overprotective.
"Well it's five o clock right now. You should probably get ready."
"Right."
"You're free to use the shower."
Lily leaves and I get ready for school. I didn't my usual routine, leaving some parts out. Lily comes in and gives me some spare clothes. I thank her and her parents and went to school. When I was walking to school, I try to see if Yuki was walking and to see if I can speak to her. I see her among the crowd of students, I push and shove to get to her. But she doesn't pay attention to me.
"Hey Yuki! Yuki!"
"Don't talk to me."
"I want to speak to you. And to apologize."
"I don't want to hear it."
She walks away and I couldn't apologize to her.
This was probably from me building my own personal walled off box.