The first day Xiao mei moved into Chi yuan's huge apartment, she felt like she had stepped into someone else's life. The place was too big, too quiet, and too clean, almost like nobody really lived there. When she pushed her small suitcase into the living room, the sound echoed a bit, and she paused, wondering if her own heartbeat was louder than her footsteps.
Chi yuan didn't even look at her for long. He just nodded and pointed at the stairs, telling her her room was the second door on the left. He stood there dressed neatly, eyes sharp but empty, like he had used all his energy somewhere else. She already knew where that place was… in the space where he kept the memories of Xi fei.
But Xiao mei still bowed her head slightly and said okay. She didn't expect him to welcome her with warmth or romance. She wasn't that unrealistic. The most she hoped for was that maybe, over time, maybe he would see her, not as a stranger or a shadow, but as someone standing right there in front of him.
That night, the house felt too cold even with all the lights on. She sat on her new bed, hands folded on her lap, staring at the door that separated her from him. It felt strange calling someone husband when she didn't even dare knock on his door to ask if he had eaten.
The next morning, she woke up early because she was nervous. Xiao mei didn't know what a wife should do in a house where the husband didn't want a wife. But she remembered something her mother once told her: when you feel lost, start with small actions. So she went into the kitchen and made breakfast. Not anything complicated, just something simple, warm, and smelling like home. Steamed buns, fried eggs, and a bowl of congee.
It was the first time she cooked in that big cold kitchen, and she wasn't sure where anything was. She even burned her finger a bit because she touched the pot too fast. She hissed softly, shaking her hand, but she didn't stop. Maybe she hoped that food could warm his heart little by little.
When Chi yuan came down the stairs, he paused a second when he saw the table set. Just a second, but Xiao mei caught it. She turned too quickly and almost spilled the congee but tried to smile calmly.
Good morning, she said.
He gave a small nod, almost like an automatic movement, and sat down. She didn't sit with him at first, thinking maybe he didn't like to be watched while eating. So she stood by the kitchen counter pretending to clean something that didn't need cleaning.
After a moment he spoke with a low voice. Are you not eating
Oh she blinked and nodded fast I will and sat quickly before she embarrassed herself more.
They ate in silence. It wasn't warm silence. It was heavy, like a wall standing between them. But she still felt something small, a hope that maybe the wall wasn't impossible to climb.
After breakfast, Chi yuan left for work without saying much. He only said he would be back late. His voice had no emotion but at least he said it, at least he didn't walk out without a word.
Xiao mei took that as something good. Even a small drop of water can fill a cup if it keeps falling. That was what she told herself all day.
In the next few days, she kept trying in her own quiet ways. She packed his lunch sometimes, leaving it at his company front desk with his name written softly on a note. She knew he might not eat it, or maybe he would throw it aside, but she still packed it.
She also cleaned the house even though it was already clean. She watered the plants he barely noticed. She tried to learn what he liked but he didn't share much. When he talked, it was always short answers, like he was afraid of giving her too much of himself.
One night, she waited for him at the dining table, hoping they could at least share one meal together. She cooked carefully, trying to remember what foods she heard him mention before. She even changed her clothes twice, wanting to look decent but not too dressed.
But Chi yuan didn't come home. He didn't even send a message. When she finally gave up waiting and put everything away, she laughed weakly at herself. Why did she hope for too much already That was only the beginning.
Yet the next morning, when he came home tired-looking, she still greeted him with a soft smile. He nodded again, his eyes barely meeting hers, but she didn't mind. She saw his dark circles, the slight mess of his hair, and she wondered if he even slept properly.
You should eat before sleeping, she said, putting down a small bowl of soup.
He almost refused, she could see it in his eyes, but then he sat down slowly and took a sip. He didn't say thank you, but he didn't push the bowl away either.
Xiao mei watched him secretly. He looked colder than the soup she left out too long, but she had a warm stubbornness inside her. She didn't want anything from him, not at that moment. She only wanted to be someone who didn't add more heaviness to his life. She wanted to be a soft place he could land on, even if he didn't realize he needed one.
Later, when he went upstairs to rest, she cleaned the dining table humming softly. She paused when she found his spoon left slightly tilted. It was such a small thing, but she smiled. It meant he had actually eaten it, not just pretended.
Every day after that, she found small pieces of him. The way he always straightened the things on the living room shelf. The way he liked quietness but didn't like being alone. The way he paused before entering the house like he was preparing himself to step into memories.
She wanted to reach him. She wanted to warm the cold inside him, the one left behind by Xi fei. But she didn't rush. She told herself she had time. She had patience. She had hope, even if it was small.
Sometimes she sat on the balcony at night, listening to the city sounds. She would look at the sky and murmur to herself Today he ate a little of my cooking or Today he talked three sentences. It sounded silly, but she counted every little progress like it was a victory.
But she didn't know something important. While she was trying her best to warm his heart, another woman was slowly returning to his world, walking closer every day.
And when she finally appeared, the warmth Xiao mei worked so hard for would crumble like dust.
But for now, in these days, she still believe
d that marriage, even a cold one, could slowly turn warm.