I made my way down to the main lobby, feeling a tiny bit more relaxed with the addition of the new bio-reactive nanites.
With this, I might be able to even take down a lower-ranked Viltrumite, I thought, holding the capsule up to my face before concealing it in my pocket. That still could be a mighty challenge if I'm not careful, though.
As the elevator doors slid open, I stepped out into the waiting area and spotted a very familiar, very out-of-place face sitting on one of the plush couches.
"Mr. Grayson will see you now," the receptionist announced politely as I entered the lobby.
"Finally," William said, jumping to his feet. "I have a few things I want to say to Mr. Bigshot. If he thinks he could forget to—"
The moment he got a good look at my bruised face and exhausted posture, his words died in his throat.
"Dude, what happened?!" he yelped, rushing over. "It looks like you got run over by a train, which shouldn't even be possible!"
"The efforts of war, or however the hell that saying goes," I replied with a tired sigh.
William raised a brow, utter confusion washing over his features. "War? Right, you never told me you were going to war. Eve just told us one day you came back to Earth and were being held in space by some evil superpowered people."
I squinted at him. "What? I didn't? I thought I did."
Ah, that's right, I didn't, I realized, as I recalled the chaotic week I had left. I came straight back from the artificial dimension and quickly deployed when Nolan and Allen showed up. If Eve hadn't come to the building, I probably would have forgotten to tell her, too.
"Ah, my fault," I apologized, rubbing the back of my neck. "I can tell you all about it now, but it's pretty wild."
"I'm all ears," William said, clapping his hands together. "Let's grab a burger."
"Aw yeah, that'd hit the spot right now," I agreed, my stomach instantly rumbling at the thought of greasy fast food.
As we started to make our way out to the front door, the receptionist suddenly stood up from her desk.
"Um, Sir," she called out. "I would have to advise you not to leave."
I turned to her, raising a brow. "Huh? Why? Somebody plottin'?"
"Well, yes, Sir," she replied earnestly. "But the main reason has to be that you informed Ms. Anissa that you wouldn't leave the building."
From beside me, William froze.
"Anissa?" he questioned. "Where have I heard that name from?" He tapped his chin, trying to recall the name. Then, his demeanor violently shifted. His eyes went wide, and he pointed an accusatory finger right at my chest. "That's the name of the woman Eve was mad about! Are you seeing another woman behind Eve's back?! You cheating bastard! I told her she couldn't let you out of her sight for more than two minutes!"
"Calm down, I ain't seeing another woman," I said defensively, batting his hand away. "The situation's just very, very complicated, that's all."
Not seeing another woman yet, my libido stated factually. But by how aggressive Anissa's starting to get, it might be sooner rather than later.
Not now, you horny bastard, I shot back internally.
"Come on, I'll tell you all about it," I said, quickly ushering William away from the lobby before he could cause more of a scene. "Let's make a stop to see how Eve's doing first, though."
William instantly dropped the accusatory glare, his face falling into genuine concern. "Oh my god, did something happen to her?" he asked worriedly.
"Yeah, an overgrown lizard tried to nuke the planet a couple minutes ago, and she had to step in to stop it since I lost my powers."
William stopped dead in his tracks, his shoes squeaking against the polished tile. "You lost your powers?!"
I sighed, massaging my temples. "Come on," I said, gesturing for him to keep walking. "It's a really long story."
I led William through the winding corridors of the building until we reached the primary med-bay.
When we stepped through the automated doors, William was instantly mesmerized—and visibly a little creeped out—by the sci-fi setup. Eve was suspended gracefully inside the glowing Solar-Containment Pod, bathed in artificial sunlight.
"Is she... in a tanning bed on steroids?" William whispered, pressing his hand against the reinforced glass.
"They're calling it a hybrid bio-regenerator," I explained, walking over to the lead medic. "They said it takes the ambient solar radiation tech they developed for my Viltrumite cells and converts it into raw bio-caloric energy tailored specifically to refuel Eve's molecular manipulation."
William tore his eyes away from the pod, and looked at me like I had grown a second head.
"Aye, that's what they said," I shrugged, handing over the glowing yellow belt Angstrom had given me to the medic. "Have her wear this when she wakes up; it'll hasten her recovery."
"Yes, Sir," the medic said, as he wrote down a note on his data pad.
Then, William and I exited the area, and made our way to a private lounge area on one of the upper floors. I had someone from logistics drop off a massive bag of fast food. I started inhaling fries while I began to tell William about everything that had happened since I left Earth.
When I finally finished, William was just staring at me, completely stunned.
"I… you… now…" he stammered, his brain visibly short-circuiting as a half-eaten fry dangled from his fingers.
"Now I'm just another bitch-ass human, like you," I pointed out, tossing a fry into my mouth.
William immediately glared at me. "First of all, you were always a 'bitch-ass human,' you were just half super-powered, too," he began, regaining his footing. "Secondly, you need to get your powers back as soon as possible!"
"I know," I muffled, taking a massive bite out of my burger.
"This Thragg guy seems like a major problem if you don't even want to get into it with him," William noted, taking a sip of his soda.
"Yea, he's a major powerhouse alright," I admitted. "The strongest Viltrumite there was in history, until I showed up."
William set his drink down, narrowing his eyes at me. "And that Anissa chick… yeah, you were definitely cheating on Eve with her. Like, do you have any shame?"
I nearly spit out my drink. "What?! What the hell are you talking about?!"
"The way you describe her is incredibly suspicious," he said, putting his hand up. "I mean, 'olive-like skin tone,' 'striking blue eyes,' 'a sharp but soft face,'" he recounted, placing a finger down for each quote. "And the way you described her lips… good lord, man! If that's how you describe her face, then I can only imagine what the rest of her looks like."
Yea, he's right. You were on your Shakespeare shit when you were describing her, my libido chimed in gleefully. And you call me horny. Shame on you!
Quiet, you! I yelled internally.
"You're a visual processor," I replied smoothly, trying to save face. "Forgive me for trying to describe her fully for ya."
"Yeah, right. You want that woman," William countered mercilessly. "If you didn't, you would have pushed harder for some random Viltrumite guard instead of letting her stick around."
Correct again. You're on fire today, William Clockwell, the libido cheered. Man, he's on your ass!
"That's so absurd that I won't even dignify it with a response for the sake of my sanity," I said, actively holding back a smirk.
"My poor babygirl, Eve," William lamented dramatically, placing a hand over his heart. "She was out there saving the world in your absence, keeping us all safe, while you're out in space being an intergalactic booty bandit with your little side piece."
Cook his ass, William! the libido hollered.
I pointed a stern finger at William. "Aye, I know exactly where that term comes from. Stay out of my magazines, there's nothing in there for you."
"Then why do you have 'em?" he shot back.
"Why, for cultural research purposes, of course," I said calmly. "Man, I don't gotta explain myself to you. I ain't doing nothin' wrong."
"Then you have nothing to worry about because I also view them for that purpose," William smirked.
"No you don't," I said, shaking my head.
"You say tomayto, I say tomahto," he retorted.
I cleared my throat, trying to regain control of the conversation. "With that being said, I haven't done any of the things you've thought I've done. My intentions are as purposeful as they've always been."
William raised a highly skeptical brow. "Really," he dragged out. "And you're not attracted to this Anissa in any shape or form?"
Shit, he doesn't gotta say another word, the libido laughed. I can just pull up the memories of her stored in your mind.
I completely ignored it. "She's simply a very devoted—and I use that word very loosely—bodyguard, until I get my powers back."
"Hmm, I don't know," William pressed, leaning forward. "I think—"
Before he could finish his sentence, a gust of displaced wind swept through the room. Standing in the doorway, back from her meeting with Thragg, was Anissa.
"You're back," I said, setting my burger down as the wind settled.
"I am," Anissa replied, stepping into the room with perfect, regal posture. "It took little effort."
William, completely stunned by her physical presence, leaned back in his chair, his eyes wide as saucers. "Mark, she's... she's..."
I shook my head, cutting him off before he could embarrass himself, and turned back to Anissa. "How did it go?"
"The Grand Regent received your message," she began, her tone strictly professional. "He has tasked our operatives to track the creature using our fleet's telemetry. Once the beast is located, he intends to mobilize a strike team to eliminate the hindrance immediately."
I let out a heavy sigh that was a mix of relief and trepidation. That could be very bad if it causes Dino-boy to panic and set off another nuke, but with their tech, we can find him incredibly quickly. That's something even Dinosaurus won't be able to account for.
"Alright, that's pretty good news for the most part," I said, reaching for a fry. "All we really have to do now is wa—"
"However, I put a stop to that," Anissa stated flatly.
I froze. "Huh?!"
"I informed them that you already defeated this creature with ease before, but the creature's strength and intellect expanded while you were away from Earth," she explained smoothly. "Given the fact that you are now in a weakened state, I told them you would not only defeat the creature again, but you would do it with your own prowess, without Viltrumite interference. This gives the Empire the time to focus strictly on wiping out that pathetic Coalition."
My eyes widened in sheer horror. "Why would you say that?!" I exclaimed, nearly coming out of my seat.
Anissa closed the distance between us in the blink of an eye, leaning directly into my face.
"Because that creature is nothing to you," she said in a very calm, almost chilling manner. "He gained some strength and decided to challenge you at a time that is disadvantageous to you. He's feeling very good about your last encounter. Which is fine because, in the end, he's just going to be another stepping stone on your way towards ascension."
I stared at her in utter disbelief.
What the fuck is she going on about?! my libido screamed in absolute panic. You ain't shit right now! That over-sized iguana is gonna boom the planet! Why would she call your only means of survival off?!
Anissa smirked, trailing her eyes down my chest. "Besides... how could I tell our future child that his father wasn't able to defeat something as pathetic as that creature?"
The room seemed to go completely silent.
William snapped out of his stupor, practically choking on his soda. "Future child?!" he shrieked, looking rapidly back and forth between the two of us.
He threw his hands over his head, pacing the floor. "Oh my god! Mark! What did you do?!"
"Fuck you mean what'd I do?!" I yelled back. "I've been sitting here listening along with you, haven't I?!"
William pointed a finger at my face. "You dirty, nasty man! You two-timing dog! You no-good scoundrel! Oh my god, Eeeeeevvvvve!"
"Boy, calm down! I ain't do nothin'!" I said, desperately trying to de-escalate the situation.
"What's going on in here?" a groggy, irritated voice suddenly asked from the entranceway.
We all turned.
Standing there, rubbing her eyes and looking incredibly tired, was Eve. She was finally awake and out of her pod, though still a bit unsteady on her feet.
"Eve!" William and I yelled simultaneously, rushing over to her side.
I reached out to support her arm. "You're awake. I'm so glad."
William immediately pushed past me. "Are you sure about that?" he asked her, before pointing a dramatic, accusatory finger directly at Anissa. "By the way, babe, he's cheating on you with that breathtaking woman over there!"
Eve blinked away her sleepiness, her gaze shifting from William's pointing finger to Anissa, who was observing the scene with a look of utter disdain.
"Ugh, don't remind me," Eve groaned, glaring at both Anissa and me.
I flinched slightly under her gaze, then turned to point at William. "Tch, that's a low move, man! And I ain't cheating on nobody! Complicated things just happened is all, which I was going to explain!"
Anissa scoffed, taking a slow, arrogant step forward. "You look absolutely wretched, Earthean," she insulted smoothly. "Though I suppose for a creature of your fragile biology, simply standing upright is an accomplishment."
Eve's eyes narrowed, the grogginess instantly burning away into pure defiance. She stood up a little straighter, crossing her arms.
"And you look like a glorified guard dog on a very short leash," Eve fired back without missing a beat. "Tell me, do you fetch when he throws things, or do you just sit and beg for his attention?"
Oh shit!My libido rang out in my head. Aye, you know that you and William need to get out of this room immediately, right?
Anissa's jaw locked. Her eyes flared with lethal intent. The air around her actually rippled as her muscles coiled, fully preparing to launch forward and rip Eve's head off.
I immediately threw myself directly between them, holding my hands out in a placating gesture.
"Okay! There's a whole lot of tension in here that we gotta put out right now!" I yelled, sweating bullets. I turned to William, desperate for a lifeline. "Aye, say something before we both become chalk outlines!"
William adjusted his shirt, stepping up to the plate with dramatic flair.
"That man is right," he declared, pointing at me without looking directly at me. "I'm referring to him as thatman because I'm deeply ashamed to say his name right now." He then turned his attention to the two glaring women. "We have to clear the air to continue moving forward."
"And how exactly do you propose we do that?" I asked, keeping myself firmly planted between Eve and Anissa.
"We leave the superhero and intergalactic tyrant stuff at the door," William announced, clapping his hands together. "We need a reset. A palate cleanser. So, we are going to the mall."
I stared at him. "The... mall?" I uttered in disbelief. "What are you, Canadian?"
"Yes, the mall," William insisted. "We are going to walk around, get some pretzels, catch up like normal humans, and prove that that man isn't building a secret alien harem. Mandatory team bonding."
Anissa... at a shopping mall? I thought, my brain struggling to process the sheer absurdity of the idea. I can't even fully imagine it.
Bro, this is either the greatest idea in human history, or the exact moment we all die, my libido whispered in pure awe.
I looked at Eve, who looked exhausted but intrigued, and then at Anissa, who looked like she wanted to vaporize the entire building.
Yea, I realized with a heavy sigh. This is going to be an absolute disaster.