"Boom!" Two clouds of smoke erupted into the air—One Big, one embarrassingly small.
From the first plume slithered a serpent with a head larger than a fully grown man.
From the second emerged… a toad barely larger than a teacup.
The contrast was so violent it felt like a comedy skit.
The tiny toad lifted a stubby foot and waved cheerfully:
"Hi~~!"
Uzumaki Naruto: "…"
Jiraiya: "…"
Shizune: "…"
Tsunade blinked so hard she nearly forgot she had hemophobia.
Inside the multiversal livestream, reactions poured in instantly:
[King of Violence]: "[That big snake is decent, but I've beaten things worse.]"
[X Man Who Never Was]: "[That tiny frog is peak comedic timing. I'm crying.]"
[Carmine]: "[I refuse to believe this is real ninjutsu.]"
[Skill Issue]: "[Summons come in all shapes… but wow, that one is tragic.]"
Ghost of Konoha—Renji Matsumoto—watched from a vantage point, the very picture of someone trying not to facepalm.
Naruto tugged on Jiraiya's sleeve.
"Ero-sennin… did you mess up?"
Jiraiya coughed into his hand, eyes shifting away in mild shame.
Before he could defend himself, Orochimaru released a low, mocking laugh.
"Jiraiya… you haven't changed at all."
"Still such a disappointment."
His words were dripping with venom, but underneath it was something twisted—almost affectionate.
Naruto didn't see it that way. He inhaled sharply, bite-mark already on his thumb.
"Don't make fun of Pervy Sage!"
"Watch this!"
"Summoning Technique!"
"Boom!"
Another cloud of smoke puffed out.
Out came… a marginally larger toad barely the size of a small dog.
Naruto froze.
Jiraiya froze harder.
Orochimaru squinted
Shizune questioned reality.
Tsunade blinked again, as if hoping the world would reset.
In the chat:
[X Man Who Never Was]: "[This Naruto is malfunctioning. Someone reboot him.]
[Girl With Trust Issues]: [Secondhand embarrassment is lethal. I might actually die.]
[Absolute Luck]: [He rolled a natural 1. Again.]
[Crazy Prez]: [Am I the only one who finds those invocations interesting?.]
[Girl With Trust Issues]:[You're not the only one. Although in my world there are creatures called Pokémon, and some that are frogs or snakes, I've never seen one that talks.]
[Girl With Trust Issues]:[I've only heard that some people can understand Pokémon with a special power called Viridian, and that only Psychic-type Pokémon can use telepathy, and that Legendary Pokémon can also communicate with humans.]
[Fallen Angel from the Dark Plane]:[In my world, it's not uncommon for a beast to speak. Certain types of humanoid beasts, or those of the ruling level and beyond, can understand human speech. What would be strange is if they wanted to communicate with humans.]
[Fallen Angel from the Dark Plane]:[In my world, it's not uncommon for a beast to speak. Certain types of humanoid beasts, or those of the ruling level and beyond, can understand human speech. What would be strange is if they wanted to communicate with humans.]
[Little Heavenly Yaksha]:[In my world, it's normal to have giant beasts. Most understand human language, but they can't speak it, though there are some exceptions.]
[Little Heavenly Yaksha]:[For example, the Sea Kings, colossal creatures that inhabit the ocean depths, can only be communicated with by using the Ancient Weapon Poseidon or by listening to what they say using the Voice of All Things.]
[Little Heavenly Yaksha]:[Other animals either learned the language on their own, or one was lucky enough to consume the Human-Human Fruit (Hito Hito no Mi), a Zoan-type Devil Fruit that transforms you into a human.]
[Little Heavenly Yaksha]:[@Skill Issue Could you please, the "Omniscient" and "All-Knowing" Interim President, do us the honor of explaining what those creatures are? ]
[King of Violence]:[@Skill Issue Honor us with your sacred "knowledge", interim president]
[X Man Who Never Was]:[@Skill Issue Yeah, interim president, expand our minds with your "knowledge" of vast universes.]
[Skill Issue]:[ Kuhuhu...Since you ask so kindly, I'll tell you, these creatures are known as Wise Animals or summoning beasts originating from the three sacred places.]
[Skill Issue]:[Mount Myoboko, the Toads ruled by Gamamaru the Toad Sage; Ryuchi Cave, the Snakes ruled by the White Snake Sage; and Shikkotsu Forest, whose sole inhabitant is Katsuyu the Slug Sage—each possesses abundant natural energy that allows for the practice of Senjutsu.]
[Skill Issue]: [Depending on your chakra control and quantity, if it's terrible you can summon a tadpole at most; if it's bad, or you lack concentration, you could end up like Jiraiya summoning a small toad.]
[Crazy Prez]: [@Skill Issue And that guy with the face of a child thief, why did he also summon a small snake?]
[Skill Issue]: [His arms are sealed, which should prevent him from using any ninjutsu; perhaps he forced his body to weave hand seals and also to transmit chakra through the chakra channels in his arms.]
[Skill Issue]: [In that case, it's most likely that he destroyed his chakra channels by forcing himself, therefore he will have his subordinate do it for him.]
Renji could sense the secondhand embarrassment the chat group members felt upon seeing such a scene, and it almost affected him—"almost"—until something else caught his attention.
Orochimaru stared down at the tiny snake he had summoned previously—the failed summon that started this entire tragedy—and clicked his tongue in irritation.
"Tch. Unacceptable Kabuto Do it You."
"Hai Orochimaru-Sama" Kabuto then started to weave hand signs.
Boar → Dog → Bird → Monkey → Ram
"Summoning Technique!"
*BOOM!!* This time, the earth shook.
The smoke pillar rose like an explosion, and even from Renji's distant vantage point, he could feel the sheer density of chakra gathering.
When the smoke cleared…
A monstrous purple-scaled serpent towered over the battlefield, its body thick as a house, its golden eyes burning with rage.
It was Manda and he looked pissed.
"OROCHIMARU…YOU BETTER HAVE A GOOD REASON FOR SUMMONING ME."
Even Naruto went silent.
Jiraiya's jaw clenched.
Shizune instinctively pulled Tsunade backward.
And Renji muttered under his breath: "…Well, that escalated fast."
The chat lit up like fireworks:
[Walking Disaster]:[Finally. Something worthy of being called a summoned Beast.]
[Absolute Luck]:[Orochimaru rolled indirectly a natural 20 this time.]
[Skill Issue]:[Manda has officially joined the disaster event.]
Carmine simply sent a dramatic crying sticker.
Orochimaru smiled thinly, as if everything was under control.
"Oh? Manda. Your entrance is as dramatic as always."
Manda swung his massive head toward Naruto and Jiraiya.
"I'M NOT INTERESTED IN WEAKLINGS."
The killing intent in the air became suffocating.
Naruto unconsciously stepped back.
Jiraiya prepared chakra despite his poisoned body trembling.
Shizune readied herself to grab Tsunade and run.
Renji sighed.
He had seen enough.
"…Alright. Showtime." From the treetops, he flicked a marked kunai toward the battlefield.
The moment it pierced the ground, the chat exploded:
[King of Violence]: [Finally! The Boss man making his entrance!]
[X Man Who Never Was]: "[Cue the main theme! Someone blast it!]
[Carmine]: [Ghost of Konoha about to farm points live—LET'S GO!]
[Skill Issue]: [Don't embarrass yourself on stream.]
Ghost of Konoha chose to ignore that last message.
Mostly.
Manda's slit pupils locked onto Jiraiya he lunged.
Shizune yelled.
Naruto charged chakra instinctively.
Jiraiya tried to step forward—his legs buckled slightly.
But before Manda's mouth could snap shut—
A voice sliced through the tension like a blade.
"BIG BALL RASENGAN!"
Pressure filled the air a figure blurred into existence directly in front of Jiraiya, chakra swirling violently in his palm—a colossal spiraling sphere of raw destructive force.
Renji.
The Rasengan smashed into Manda's scaled snout before the serpent could react.
"BOOOOOOM!!"
The explosion rattled the valley, sending dust flying in every direction Manda was launched backward, tumbling like a derailed train, crushing trees and boulders effortlessly until he slid to a stop far, far away.
The chat lost its mind:
[Absolute Luck]: [THAT WAS A CRITICAL HIT IF I EVER SAW ONE!!]
[Crazy Prez]: [I FELT THAT IN MY SOUL—DAMN!!]
[Walking Disaster]: "[Ghost of Konoha soloing boss-tier summons since chapter 1.]"
[Strongest Hero]: "[At least he didn't miss…]
Naruto's mouth hung open.
Jiraiya stared in absolute silence.
Tsunade forgot what fear was for a moment.
Shizune lowered her fists, trembling.
And all four pairs of eyes fell on the man now standing between them and Manda's rampage.
Renji turned slightly.
His cloak swayed with the settling dust.
And on the back—
五代目火影
—stood bold and unmistakable.
The Fifth Hokage.
Jiraiya nearly choked on his own spit.
Naruto pointed both hands at Renji as if accusing him of a cosmic crime.
"WHEN—WHEN DID YOU BECOME THE FIFTH HOKAGE!?!?"
Even Tsunade blinked rapidly, unsure if she was hallucinating.
Renji let the silence hang.
Dust drifted past him like drifting embers.
The chat erupted once more:
[X Man Who Never Was]: [Peak anime protagonist entrance. Literal perfection.]
[Girl With Trust Issues]: [I'm simping so hard it's unhealthy.]
[King of Violence]: [Not bad. This level of dominance is acceptable.]
And finally—
[Skill Issue]: […So you're finally showing off, huh?]
Renji exhaled slowly, a small smirk forming beneath the shadow of his cloak.
Ghost of Konoha replied in the chat:
"…Try not to blink."
And the battlefield knew—the real fight had only just begun.