Chapter 190: Brother's Girlfriend?
"Sniff, sniff~"
Hikigaya hugged his sister and took a deep breath. The familiar scent nearly moved him to tears.
"Eek~ Is Onii-chan treating me like Kamakura?" (The Hikigaya family cat). "That's so gross!!"
Komachi shivered and reached out with a look of disgust to pinch his nose.
"I've heard quite a few startling stories about you from Chabashira. I thought you'd become some sort of Great Demon King after going to Advanced Nurturing. Looking at you now, you're still the same old idiotic siscon!"
Hiratsuka Shizuka leaned back in her office chair, crossing her long legs clad in black stockings, and sized Hikigaya up with great interest.
Hikigaya felt immense gratitude and blurted out, "I love you to death, Hiratsuka-sensei!"
"Cough, cough!"
Startled, Hiratsuka Shizuka sat bolt upright. A flush of crimson spread across her face before she feigned anger.
"I take it back! You really have turned into a bad man!"
"Yeah, yeah, sure..."
Hikigaya waved his hand dismissively, signaling for her to go back to being an idle NPC for a moment.
"Komachi, Happy Birthday in advance!"
From the box behind him, Hikigaya pulled out an extra-large panda plushie.
"Wow, it's a Pan-san doll." Komachi read the line with zero emotion in a total deadpan.
"That reaction... you don't like it?" Hikigaya's heart skipped a beat.
"As long as it's a gift from Onii-chan, even if it's just a blank piece of paper, Komachi would be very happy~
Oh my~ Komachi's words just now scored super high points!" Komachi tilted her head and made a mischievous face, though it was still very cute.
"However, giving a gift like this to a girl proves that Onii-chan hasn't found a girlfriend at school."
'Damn it! That damn trashy brat actually hit the nail on the head!'
"Wait! Is it possible that Onii-chan prepared two gifts?" Hikigaya struck a pose, trying to look profound and mysterious.
"Eh?! For real? You can actually do that?" Komachi's eyes widened, clearly surprised.
"Ta-da~"
Hikigaya pulled a gift box from his pocket. When opened, it revealed an exquisite silver hair clip inlaid with gemstones.
"Th-this... how is this possible...?!"
Komachi's mouth hung open in shock, as if she were looking at something impossible. However, what surprised her most wasn't the gift itself, but the fact that her brother actually knew how to pick out something girls would like!
"Onii-chan..."
"What? So moved you're speechless?"
"You've found a girlfriend, haven't you?"
"Huh?!" Hikigaya looked completely baffled.
Even Hiratsuka Shizuka, who had been idling on the side, couldn't help but crane her neck to peer at the gift.
"That's the same model of hair clip Hashimoto Kanna wears!
This isn't right! This is beyond wrong!!
You aren't Hikigaya Hachiman!!!"
Hiratsuka Shizuka let out a hysterical roar as if she had lost her mind.
"Don't start acting up, Hiratsuka-sensei."
Hikigaya reached out a large hand, pressed it against her face, and shoved her back.
"There's definitely something fishy!
With Onii-chan's twisted logic, there's no way he could have thought of such a great gift!"
Komachi pointed at him with total conviction and said decisively, "There is only one truth... A girl definitely helped you choose it. In short—she's Onii-chan's girlfriend!!!"
Faced with the analysis of Sherlock Komachi, Hikigaya flatly denied it.
"Impossible! Absolutely impossible! That annoying trash-loli could never be my girlfriend!"
Stare.
Komachi picked up a magnifying glass from the desk and scrutinized his face: "Information gathering in progress. Onii-chan's girlfriend likely possesses loli-like physical traits but is very intelligent—at least enough to suppress Onii-chan."
"Wh-where did you get that idea..." Hikigaya's eyes flickered, and he began to avoid the subject.
"Wow! Onii-chan didn't deny it! It looks like Komachi guessed right!!"
Komachi looked excited and poked his chest with her finger, her eyebrows raised teasingly. "Eww~ I didn't expect Onii-chan to actually be a lolicon!"
"Nonsense! I am clearly a pure-blooded siscon!!" Hikigaya thumped his chest hard, his words ringing with power.
"Pah! Whether you're a siscon or a lolicon, neither of those is a normal sexual preference, okay?" Hiratsuka Shizuka crossed her arms over her ample chest and curled her lip in annoyance.
"Then what do you call 'normal'?
Big boobs and black stockings?" Hikigaya's eyes darted sideways.
Admittedly, they were a feast for the eyes! Though it wasn't like he hadn't experienced them before—even if it was only in a dream.
"You brat, what are you looking at?"
Being stared at by his blatant gaze made Hiratsuka Shizuka feel a bit flustered, and she instinctively shielded her chest with her arms.
"Wow! Onii-chan's gaze... how should I put it?
It feels as practiced as if he's waking up every morning to eat bread!" Komachi looked at him suspiciously.
"Onii-chan hasn't evolved into a two-timing scumbag, has he?"
Hikigaya joked, "What's the big deal about two-timing? Your brother here can link ships with iron chains and walk across them like it's flat ground!"
Whoosh!
An iron fist struck with lightning speed!
'A sneak attack? Hmph! Do you think I'm still the same little fry from back then who just lets your iron fist educate me?'
Hikigaya instinctively raised a hand to block. He firmly caught Hiratsuka Shizuka's fist.
Then... Hikigaya felt a terrifying surge of force. The iron fist pressed through his palm and struck him directly in the chest!
Thump!
Hikigaya took the punch squarely, his body stumbling back several steps.
"Yo! You actually didn't get flattened by one punch.
It seems you really did learn some real skills at Advanced Nurturing!"
Hiratsuka Shizuka clenched her fist. The veins on the back of her hand were clearly visible, containing startling power.
"However, if you want to catch this old lady's iron fist, you're still too green!!"
"Cough, cough~" Hikigaya had no choice but to raise his hands in surrender, saying very submissively, "I admit I was talking a bit too loud just now."
"Hey, hey! Whose sister are you anyway?" On the side, Komachi laughed gleefully at his misfortune.
"Hehe~ To deal with an Onii-chan with a twisted personality, you have to use classical mechanics!"
Hikigaya stepped forward with feigned anger, reaching out to pinch her slightly chubby baby-face.
"Blehh~ An Onii-chan who only bullies his sister is a piece of trash!" Komachi shielded her cheeks with both hands, pouting her lips and sticking out her tongue.
Watching the siblings play around happily, Hiratsuka Shizuka wore a heartfelt smile.
Just then, the office door was slid open.
"Yukinoshita, why are you here? Entering without knocking."
"I did knock, but Hiratsuka-sensei didn't respond."
"That's because before I could even open my mouth, you barged in."
"Parroting words again. Hiratsuka-sensei clearly did it on purpo—!"
The entering Yukinoshita Yukino was immediately and deeply captivated by that extra-large panda plushie.
Read ahead (160 chapters) by supporting me on buymeacoffee com/varietl or ko-fi edwriting