"You two have really done it this time. And Ruan Mei, you shouldn't encourage them in their nonsense," Herta said, taking a seat again and calling out Chen Li and Little Herta by name. At the same time, she complained to Ruan Mei, who knew what was happening but let it all unfold.
"A machine spirit... a very interesting concept. Although it doesn't overlap with my field of research, I am very interested," Ruan Mei said, still sizing up the Little Herta sitting between her and Chen Li as she held her teacup.
"Chen Li, stop eating. Why did Screwllum leave in such a hurry?" Big Herta, who hadn't installed an eating module on her current puppet, looked resentfully at Chen Li as he ate the pastries Ruan Mei had brought. You'd better leave some for me, you bastard!
"You have the nerve to ask? If you hadn't consumed 12 bonds from the Friends Circle, Screwllum wouldn't have had to make a special trip back to his world just to send an express delivery of the terminals to Silver Wolf from there," Chen Li complained.
To this day, Chen Li still didn't understand how Herta, holding a King Bomb, could get obliterated by the Silent Lord's 17-card hand! How do you get your life-saving item shattered 12 times while holding so many Curios?
"Ahem, well, it was to prevent her from quickly realizing it was me messing with her, so I didn't use any kind of power. I could only rely on my physical abilities to dodge. And you know what the physical abilities of a puppet body are like..." Herta said, embarrassed.
For Herta to be embarrassed proved that she had indeed been up to no good. The Disguise Glasses could disguise one's race, even the identity of a puppet, but the residue of Herta's power could potentially be collected by the Silent Lord after leaving her body. Although the glasses were a Curio forged with only a few Crystals, they still possessed the conceptual power a Curio should have.
"Forget it, let's not talk about this. Didn't you say you had something else to tell us? Little Herta, you can't eat these pastries. They're drugged," Chen Li said, swatting away Little Herta's hand as she reached for the pastries Ruan Mei had prepared.
These were specialty pastries that Chen Li had specifically asked Ruan Mei to make. They contained truth serum, anti-truth serum, anti-anti-truth serum, anti-anti-anti-truth serum... And because these pastries were from different origins and used extraordinary ingredients, they could not only increase Chen Li's poison resistance but also his attribute points.
It was good to have an expert in life sciences around; you never had to worry about a shortage of strange drugs. Although Mobius was also an expert in this field, Chen Li had already eaten through almost her entire stock of medicine. He wondered if Mobius had collected any interesting drugs at the Alchemy Commission. He should make a trip there this morning.
"Oh," Little Herta responded with disappointment.
"Don't bully a child," Big Herta chided. She remembered Chen Li saying that as long as Little Herta believed she'd be fine after eating it, she really would be fine. Chen Li, if you're just greedy, say so.
"I've also prepared other, normal pastries. They're in a red envelope in the Friends Circle terminal," Ruan Mei said, noticing Little Herta's thoughts. She took the items stored in the Friends Circle red envelope and placed them on the coffee table.
"Hmm, items can be stored in red envelopes now?" Herta was taken aback.
"It's a new feature," Chen Li said. He had the little programmer sprite in the background to thank for its hard work.
"Time to eat! Big Herta, why aren't you eating?" Little Herta popped a pastry into her mouth and asked Herta.
"..." Herta, who had no eating module, fell silent. She was contemplating whether to teleport her main body here, snatch all of Little Herta's pastries, and then hang her up by her feet and spank her for three days and three nights.
"I saved a portion for you as well, Herta. I'll send it to you now," Ruan Mei said.
"This is no fun," Little Herta sighed. She wanted to see the look of envy and jealousy on Big Herta's face even more. That's what you get for being a shut-in! It's time to get out and about, old woman!
"Can I hit her?" Herta asked Chen Li, pointing at Little Herta.
"Why are you asking me? She's your puppet. Besides, this puppet body of yours can't beat her anyway."
"Alright, Herta, don't squabble with a child," Ruan Mei said softly.
"That's right, Little Herta is still just a child!" Chen Li nodded repeatedly. He was conducting an experiment: could a Herta puppet without a machine spirit be angered to the point of going red hot? It seemed not. Big Herta didn't seem to care.
"I came back because I have something to tell you all. It's... after using your Pale Justice, Chen Li, it seems I have to complete a knight's trial, right?" Herta ignored Little Herta's provocation and turned to Chen Li.
"That's the gist of it, but a knight's trial won't be too outrageous. So even summoning a Nurgle Knight shouldn't give you a task that's too disgusting. What's your mission?" Chen Li asked curiously.
"The mission this Nurgle Knight gave me is a choice between two options. Either I stay in the most famous garbage dump I can access for a full day, or I stay inside the single most unique trash can in the entire universe for three hours," Herta sighed.
Both tasks were a bit demanding, but not excessively so. Completing either one wouldn't put Herta in any life-threatening danger, but it would completely ruin the reputation of this genius—who believed she had the potential to become an Emanator of Beauty—in the world of Pure Beauty. The difficulty of the first task was enduring the stench for a whole day. The difficulty of the second was figuring out how to find a trash can that was unique in the entire universe.
Moreover, the quest wouldn't give you any hints. This meant that if the trash can you found wasn't the most unique one in the universe, and you didn't get the mission completion notification after three hours, you'd have to go find another one.
"I don't want to complete either of these tasks, so I came to ask if you have any methods, Chen Li."
"The knight's trial given by Pale Justice must be completed. While I could forge you a Curio to waive the price, it would be a waste. Besides, I have a simple and quick way to complete the second task," Chen Li said.
Dad once said you have to use magic to fight magic, so you could also use a Curio to fight a Curio. But forging a Curio that waives the price of other Curios would be very expensive, and even using such a Curio might come with its own price. And right now, Chen Li just so happened to be broke.
"What is it?" Herta pressed.
"I have this." Chen Li snapped his fingers, and before Herta's eyes, he wove a huge, golden trash can out of golden threads.
"This is... Oh, The Cleaner!" Herta, who had watched all of Chen Li's Miracle Card scenes out of interest, recognized it instantly.
"This trash can is guaranteed to be unique, and guaranteed to be clean and tidy. Should I send it to your main body now?"
"You may." Herta looked at the sufficiently clean, and even rather beautiful, trash can and nodded. If it was a trash can personally woven by Chen Li, it wasn't unacceptable.
After all, for the foreseeable future, until she found a better option, Herta would continue to send the Nurgle Knight to fight the Silent Lord. And if she didn't complete the trial assigned by the Nurgle Knight from the last time, she couldn't summon him again. That Nurgle Knight's combat power was average, but he was certainly a master of disgust. Spending three hours a day in this trash can in exchange for being able to thoroughly mess with the Silent Lord was a huge win!
Besides, Herta could just log into her puppet's account while her main body was in the trash can.
...
"I've received it. The size is perfect. I'm just coming out for a second to change my position... Wait, why can't I get out?" Herta's voice grew audibly panicked.
"Hmm? Didn't I tell you? A trash can woven from the merits of The Cleaner naturally has a confinement effect," Chen Li tilted his head.
"You didn't say that! And not only can my main body not get out, but the Herta puppet I'm controlling now can only use the chat function and can't move normally!"
"Don't worry, this confinement will wear off soon. After all, you're not some deeply sinful woman. The trash can will lose its confinement effect after a little while," Chen Li said.
"No! Chen Li, hurry up and use the 'summon friend' function to summon me over! I'm not ready yet, at least I can't be immobile right now!" Herta suddenly said.
After Herta got the Key of Fateful Invitation, Chen Li had signed a Friend contract with her. Although her main body was far away, the Friend relationship established through the Herta puppet was still valid. The body is not important, the spirit is what matters.
"Why?"
"To prevent 'that woman' (the Silent Lord) from discovering in such a short time that it was me who played a prank on her and coming to assassinate me, only to see me in such an embarrassing state, of course!" Big Herta said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
"Fine." Chen Li tossed out a Star Stone. As a magic circle slowly expanded, a figure gradually appeared before Chen Li and Ruan Mei.
Little Herta was already adorable enough, but she could only exhibit seven-tenths of the beauty of Big Herta as a child. Now, Lady Herta herself had finally appeared.
Her face was exquisite, with a girlish liveliness, yet her deep eyes revealed a wisdom that surpassed her age. Her gradient long hair, shifting from brown to purple, cascaded like a river of stars. She wore her signature witch's hat, its brim slightly lowered, adding an air of mystery to its owner. Her classical witch-style attire, mainly in black and purple, accentuated her figure. Her long and short black boots left much to the imagination, and on top of that, the soul-infused black stockings...
Lady Herta is peerless in this world! Lady Herta is sharp as a tack! Lady Herta has a beauty that sinks fish and fells geese!
...provided you ignore her current posture.
"Wait, why did the trash can come with me?!" Big Herta, stuck in a trash can and wearing a wide-brimmed magic hat, looked up at Chen Li, utterly bewildered.
"I did it on purpose," Chen Li said, completely unapologetic.
"Huh?"
"Never mind all that. Big Herta, you can't move now, right?" Chen Li asked with a smile, looking at Big Herta stuck in the trash can.
"What... what are you trying to do?"
"To take a commemorative photo, of course! Come on, say 'cheese' with me!"
"Let's be clear, you help me out of this right after the photo!"
"No problem!"
...
My name is Asta, the lead researcher of the Herta Space Station. Although since the station's establishment, I have only met Lady Herta herself a handful of times, each meeting has been unforgettable.
Just like now...
When Asta entered the room, which brought together several geniuses, carrying a tray of tea and pastries, she saw a scene that she would never forget for the rest of her life.
A strange man (Chen Li had always appeared as the Homu King when meeting Asta, but not now), was gently holding the peerless, sharp-as-a-tack, fish-sinking, goose-felling, beautiful, intelligent, young, and lovely Lady Herta herself in a princess carry. And underneath Lady Herta was a gorgeous and elegant trash can.
"Thump!"
Asta took a step back and frantically mashed the emergency close button on the conference room's automatic door.
"It must be a hallucination from counting stars to fall asleep last night!" Asta slapped her own face, which still wore an expression of utter disbelief.
Oh, this is so weird! It must be the work of the Masked Fools!
Damn those Masked Fools!
---o---