I've always been viewed as avoidant, it wasn't necessarily deliberate, though i did relish seeing the pain i caused men, not out of spite but power. I fear it's an inescapable whirlpool, the desire to feel power, i relish it, you could say it gets me on even.
here i am with another failed relationship, i did infact like him, i wasn't attracted to him if i was being entirely honest, i just love how far he could go to please me, who wouldn't want to?
Pondering on whether to let him beg some more or put him out of his misery is as taxing as you would think.
I've been in my tub for 30 minutes already. I'm running late but who cares, i own the place.
Although i should really get up and get ready plus i have my annual meeting with the board today.
My phone begins to ring, i flash my eyes across the screen, an unknown number? by this time?
i wipe my hands on a towel, and pick up the call.
i wait to hear a voice, then i do. Clearly nervous but concealing it the voice mutters.
"hello"
i answer with clear hint of irritation in my voice "who's this?"
"sorry ms Danielle, it's Charles speaking"
"Introducing yourself like i'm supposed to know you takes balls, who is this?"
"oh, pardon me. i was told they sent out an email"
"okay, i'm going to be real slow with you. Who told you an email was sent to me and introduce yourself properly because i assume you know who you're speaking to?"
"Yes, apologies. Sorry, my name is c-charles i'm an intern at Autumn, jennifer gave me your number. you're my shadow master"
Confusion was a thing i hated but it was clearly all i could feel, why was a boy from my company calling at 9am and telling me i was his "shadow master" not to glean on whatever the hell that means why would my floor's secretary even give out my personal cell.
"sorry, have i lost you?"
i hear an accent i completely missed earlier due to irritation and confusion, it's british.
"No, you have not lost me. what did you say your name was again? Charles what?"
"Charles Lancaster"
"Okay charles lancaster, i'll rectify whatever this is. This is a minor error that would be solved soon"
"U-uh okay ma"
"And charles?"
"yes?"
"please don't ever call me again"
"you got it ma"
i immediately hang up the phone, this fucking conversation made me exhausted all over again.
Well, time to get dressed. Jensen probably has the car running, i should call him just to be sure.