Cherreads

Chapter 38 - Is This me

(2020 – Two Weeks After Winning the WBC Title)

Record: 11-1 (8 KOs)

The money was a quiet, digital ghost. It appeared in accounts overseen by a new, fiercely independent financial manager Lena had vetted—a no-nonsense woman named Priya who treated Solano's existence as a mild nuisance. The numbers were abstract: $2.1 million net from the Mendez fight after taxes, bonds, and expenses. The "Phantom Bond" investors were being paid out, creating a wave of feel-good stories about fans making money on their champion. The "Relentless" sponsorship ballooned into seven figures. There was talk of a signature shoe. Hayes, now perpetually smelling of champagne and possibility, chirped about eight-figure offers from DAZN and ESPN. Kyon was, by any measure, rich.

He felt nothing about it.

The Celebrity was a louder, more persistent ghost. It followed him out of the T-Mobile Arena and into a new life he didn't recognize. He'd moved out of his sparse apartment into a secured loft in Detroit's revitalized downtown. The space was vast, all exposed brick and polished concrete, filled with light and silence he hadn't earned. It felt like a museum exhibit titled "Champion's Dwelling."

His days, once a monastic rhythm of pain and pursuit, were now a disjointed collage of obligations. A photo shoot for Esquire: "The Pugilist Philosopher." They dressed him in tailored sweaters and had him stare moodily out windows. An appearance on a late-night talk show where a famous host made jokes about his "phantom" status that Kyon didn't understand, so he just smiled thinly, giving off an air of enigmatic intensity they loved. A charity gala for underprivileged youth in New York, where wealthy patrons in diamonds asked him to demonstrate his "footwork" on the parquet floor.

He was a specimen. A curiosity. The boxing world wanted his next fight—unification bouts were whispered, legendary names like the undefeated, flashy Terence "Trigger" Monroe in the WBA. The mainstream world wanted his story, his pain, his art, packaged in digestible soundbites.

He trained, but it was different. Thorne was back, but the dynamic had shifted seismically. The Crucible was no longer a forge; it was a workshop. Thorne was a consultant, not a commander. He would arrive, they'd study film of potential opponents, Thorne would offer razor-sharp insights in his gravelly rasp, they'd work on specific techniques, and then Thorne would leave. No life lessons. No shared silence. It was pure, distilled craft. The trust was a professional one, based on proven results. The love, if it had ever existed in a healthy form, was a fossil.

One afternoon, after a session focusing on countering Trigger Monroe's blistering hand speed, Thorne lingered as Kyon unwrapped his hands.

"You're holding your right a half-inch lower when you feint the jab now," Thorne said, not looking at him. "It's smart against a speed guy. Lets you fire the check hook faster. But Monroe's coach will see it after two rounds."

Kyon nodded. "I'll vary it."

Thorne grunted, gathering his gear. At the door, he paused. "The money. It changes the ground under your feet. Makes it soft. Don't let it."

"I'm not," Kyon said.

"You bought a loft with a view," Thorne stated flatly.

"It has a private gym."

"It has a view," Thorne repeated, and left.

The comment festered. Was the view a betrayal? A step into a frame of a different kind? That evening, standing at his floor-to-ceiling window looking out at the glittering Detroit riverfront and the renaissance he'd had no part in building, he felt a profound dislocation. This wasn't his city. His city was the crumbling streets around The Crucible, the stale smell of the old gym, the hollow ache of a hungry walk home. This was a postcard.

His phone buzzed. A text from an unsaved number, but he knew it.

Saw you on TV. You looked handsome, and very far away. I'm glad you're safe. – E

He stared at it. Handsome. A word no one had ever applied to him. Scary, fast, haunted, ripped – never handsome. He typed a reply, deleted it, typed again.

Thanks. I'm in Detroit. You?

The three dots appeared immediately.

Cincinnati. The diner gave me more hours. Manager says I'm a local celebrity. "The champ's mom." I don't correct him.

He could feel the awkwardness through the screen. The unspoken contract of 'no expectations' was straining under the weight of a world title.

Do you need anything? he sent, the words feeling clumsy, transactional.

No. No, Kyon. I have what I need. I just wanted you to know I'm watching. And I'm here. If you ever want to talk about something that isn't boxing.

He didn't know how to do that. Boxing was the language. Without it, they were strangers bound by a painful biology. He sent a thumbs-up emoji, the universal sign of emotional cowardice.

The loneliness in the luxurious loft became a physical presence. Hayes, sensing his star client's unease, decided what he needed was "integration." "You need to live a little, kid! You're a young, rich, famous athlete! This is the time!"

Which is how Kyon found himself, a week later, at an art gallery opening in Chelsea, New York. It was Hayes's idea: "See? Culture. Art. Like you're always on about. Mingle. Maybe you'll meet a nice… appreciator of the arts."

The gallery was a white-walled cavern pulsing with ambient electronic music. Beautiful people in architectural black clothing sipped prosecco and spoke in low, serious tones about "texture" and "negative space." Kyon stood near a sculpture that looked like a twisted car wreck made of chrome, feeling like an exhibit himself. He wore a dark, simple suit Lena's stylist had chosen. People recognized him. He saw the double-takes, the whispers. A few brave souls approached for selfies. He complied, a polite ghost.

He was about to fabricate an excuse to Hayes and leave when he saw her.

She was across the room, not looking at the art, but sketching in a small, leather-bound notebook. She was focused, utterly absorbed, her brow slightly furrowed. She had a wild mane of dark, curly hair tied back in a haphazard knot, and she wore paint-splattered jeans and a simple black tank top under a worn leather jacket, a flag of genuine work in the sea of curated chic. She wasn't traditionally beautiful in the gallery way; her face was too strong, her nose had a slight, interesting bend, her mouth was full and currently pursed in concentration. She was real.

He found himself moving toward her, not by conscious decision, but drawn by the same force that pulled him toward a balanced heavy bag or a flaw in an opponent's stance—a point of authentic tension in a fake landscape.

He stopped a few feet away, looking not at her, but at the chrome wreckage she was sketching. She was abstracting it, turning the literal violence of metal into flowing, lyrical lines of ink.

"You're changing the story," he said, his voice surprising him.

She started, looked up. Her eyes were a startling, clear green, flecked with gold. They held intelligence and immediate, unguarded curiosity. No recognition flickered in them. She saw a man in a suit, interrupting her work.

"The artist's story is about impact and ruin," she said, her voice lower than he expected, with a faint, unplaceable accent. "I'm interested in the flow of the energy after the crash. The way the force becomes a shape."

Kyon felt a click, not in his fists, but in his mind. "The aftermath as a new form."

She studied him now, her gaze sharpening. "Yes. Exactly. Most people just see a car crash." She gestured with her pen. "You're not most people."

"I've seen a few crashes," he said.

She smiled then, a small, genuine thing that transformed her face. "Haven't we all." She glanced past him, seeming to notice the room for the first time. "I shouldn't be here. My friend Leila is the artist. She promised me free wine. The wine is terrible, but the subject matter is good." She closed her notebook. "I'm Alana."

"Kyon."

She extended a hand, ink-stained and strong. He shook it. Her grip was firm, dry.

"Are you a collector, Kyon?" she asked, a playful challenge in her eyes.

"No. I'm… lost. My manager thought this would be good for me."

She laughed, a warm, unfiltered sound that cut through the ambient muzak. "An honest man in an art gallery. That's rarer than a good sculpture." She looked him up and down, her assessment frank. "You don't look like you belong here either. Too… solid. Like you work with your body."

"I do."

"What do you do?"

He hesitated. The title, the fame—it felt like it would shatter this fragile, real connection. "I'm an athlete."

She nodded, accepting it. "That explains the posture. You hold space like you own it, but you don't want to. Interesting contradiction." She slung her bag over her shoulder. "I'm escaping. The wine is giving me a headache. There's a decent dive bar around the corner that serves whiskey that tastes like gasoline and truth. Care to join me? I want to know why an athlete who looks like he'd rather be anywhere else is staring at post-crash formalism."

He should have said no. He had an early flight. Hayes would panic. But the loft's silent luxury yawned behind him, and her green eyes were a clean, uncomplicated challenge.

"Yes," he said.

The bar was everything the gallery wasn't: dark, sticky-floored, smelling of beer and old wood. They took a booth in the back. She ordered two whiskeys, neat. He didn't correct her.

"So," she said, after the first burning sip. "Athlete. What sport?"

"Boxing."

Her eyebrows raised. "Really? You don't have the… mashed-up face."

"I'm good at not getting hit."

She laughed again. "A useful skill in life. I'm a painter. And a sometimes-graphic novelist. I like stories where people get hit, metaphorically, and have to put themselves back together. Hence the interest in crashes." She tilted her head. "You're being deliberately vague. Are you famous, Kyon?"

"In some circles."

"And in my circle, which consists of other broke artists and my cat, you're a mystery man in a good suit." She leaned forward. "I like mysteries. Tell me one true thing about you that has nothing to do with boxing."

The question disarmed him completely. No one had ever asked that. They asked about the orphanage, about the Olympics, about the loss, about the comeback. They asked about the art of boxing. They never asked about him.

He thought of the stone his mother had laid in the hollow. He thought of the view Thorne despised.

"I just bought a place with a huge window," he found himself saying. "And I'm afraid the view is going to make me forget who I am."

Alana's playful expression softened into something more serious. She nodded slowly. "That's a good truth. A fear of forgetting. Most of the people I know are afraid of being forgotten." She took another sip. "What would you see out the window that would make you remember?"

He didn't have to think. "A dirty street. A broken streetlight. A chain-link fence."

"Then you bought the wrong window."

"I'm starting to think so."

They talked for two hours. He told her about Detroit, about the feeling of the heavy bag, about the click of perfect movement. He didn't mention Thorne, or Solano, or Eleanor. He talked about the craft, the geometry, the pursuit of a silent truth in the middle of noise. She listened, rapt, asking questions not about victories or knockouts, but about the feeling of fatigue in the 11th round, about the sound of the crowd when you're defenseless on the ropes, about the color of the canvas under the lights.

She told him about growing up in Montreal, about her Greek mother and Irish father, about moving to New York to chase a dream that involved more ramen noodles than gallery shows. She talked about the loneliness of creation, the fear of the blank page, the exhilarating terror of showing your work to the world.

"It's the same," he said, amazed. "The ring is just a very small, very violent canvas."

Her eyes sparkled. "Yes."

When they finally left the bar, the New York night was cold and clear. They stood on the sidewalk, the neon of the bar sign painting her face in pink and blue.

"I have to go back to Detroit tomorrow," he said.

"I live here," she said. "In a very small apartment with the aforementioned cat and many, many canvases that no one wants to buy."

He wanted to ask for her number. He felt like a teenager, clumsy and urgent.

She solved it for him. She took his hand—not to shake it, but turned it over, looking at his knuckles. They were smooth, the scars old and faded. She ran a thumb, calloused from holding brushes and tools, over them.

"You have good hands," she said quietly. "They tell a better story than any artist statement in that gallery." She released him, took out a pen, and wrote a number on the inside of his wrist. Her skin brushed his. It was the most intimate contact he'd had in years. "If you ever want to talk about windows, or crashes, or anything else that's true."

Then she turned and walked away, disappearing into the New York night.

Kyon stood there, feeling the ink on his skin, feeling more alive, more seen, and more unsettled than he had since the moment the referee raised his hand against Mendez.

The next week was a blur of dissonance. Back in the loft, the silence was now filled with the memory of her laugh, the clarity of her green eyes. He trained with Thorne, his mind split. Thorne noticed.

"You're slow on the pivot. Your mind's in New York," Thorne grunted after Kyon ate a light jab from a sparring partner.

Kyon didn't deny it.

Thorne stopped the session. "This is how it starts. The money, the distractions, the… women. They're softer than the canvas. They'll ruin your balance."

"She's an artist," Kyon said, the defensiveness in his voice surprising him.

Thorne's eyes narrowed. "Worse. She'll think she understands. She won't. No one who hasn't been in the fire understands the forge. Keep her in a separate room, Kyon. Or she'll put out the flame."

The old warning, the old control, sparked the new defiance in him. "The forge is mine. I'll decide what fuels it."

He called her that night. She answered on the second ring.

"Mystery man," she said, and he could hear the smile in her voice.

They talked for an hour. She asked about his day. He told her about Thorne's comment. She was silent for a moment.

"He's afraid for you," she said. "And he's afraid of losing what he built. Both can be true. But he doesn't own your narrative, Kyon. You're the one who has to live in the house with the wrong window."

She saw through layers with an artist's perception. It was terrifying and exhilarating.

He flew her to Detroit the following weekend. Hayes was apoplectic about "op security" and "distractions." Lena simply said, "Don't let her get photographed. Not yet."

Alana didn't want to see the loft. She wanted to see The Crucible.

He took her there at night. The silence was profound. She walked through the space, her fingers trailing over the patched heavy bag, the rust on the speed bag chain.

"This is where you became," she said, her voice reverent. "This is the true window."

She asked him to show her. Not to fight, but to move. He shadowboxed under the single hanging light, his movements fluid, a silent poem of violence. She watched, not with the lust or bloodlust of a fan, but with the keen, analyzing eye of a fellow creator. When he finished, she was sketching furiously in her book.

"It's a kinetic sculpture," she murmured. "The potential energy… the lines of force… it's beautiful."

No one had ever called it beautiful in that way. Necessary, brutal, effective, artistic—yes. But beautiful, as a pure form? Never.

He took her to a diner afterward, a gritty, fluorescent-lit place miles from his luxury loft. Over greasy eggs and coffee, she told him about a gallery in Brooklyn that was maybe, possibly, going to give her a small solo show. Her excitement was palpable, unjaded.

"I'm going to call the series 'The Anatomy of Impact,'" she said, her eyes shining. "Inspired by a certain mystery man."

He drove her back to her hotel. At the door, she turned to him. "Thank you for showing me your cathedral."

He kissed her then. It wasn't planned. It was a reflex, a natural, inevitable movement. She kissed him back, her hands coming up to frame his face, her touch sure and gentle. It was a different kind of click—softer, warmer, opening a door in a wall he didn't know he had.

When he got home, the loft felt different. Not like home, but the view out the window held less power. He had a new coordinate on his internal map: her.

The following Tuesday, he drove to Cincinnati. He didn't tell Eleanor he was coming. He stood outside the diner during the late-afternoon lull. He saw her through the window, refilling a man's coffee, her waitress uniform neat, her face calm. She had a kind, tired smile for the customer.

His heart hammered against his ribs. This was a different kind of fight.

He walked in. The bell on the door jingled. She looked up, the professional smile on her face. It froze, then shattered into a mosaic of shock, hope, and fear.

"Kyon."

"Can I get a coffee?" he asked, his voice rough.

She nodded, wordless, and pointed to a booth in the back corner. He sat. A minute later, she brought two mugs, sliding into the seat opposite him. The diner was quiet, just the hum of a fridge and the distant sizzle of the grill.

"I was in the area," he lied.

She saw through it but accepted the gift of the lie. "How are you?"

"I'm… navigating."

"The money? The fame?"

"The windows."

She understood. She sipped her coffee. "You met someone."

It wasn't a question. He looked at her, startled.

"A mother knows," she said softly. "Even one like me. There's a light in your eyes that isn't from a championship belt. It's… softer."

He told her about Alana. Haltingly at first, then in a rush. About the gallery, the bar, the sketching, The Crucible, the kiss. He told her things he hadn't fully articulated to himself.

Eleanor listened, her hands wrapped around her mug. When he finished, she had tears in her eyes, but she was smiling. "She sees you. The man, not the myth. That's a rare and wonderful thing."

"Thorne thinks she's a distraction."

"Marcus Thorne," Eleanor said, the name careful in her mouth, "is a man who made a weapon. Weapons don't need love. Men do."

The simple truth of it rocked him.

"I don't know how to do this," he confessed, the admission spilling out. "Any of it. The money. The fame. Her. You."

Eleanor reached across the table, her hand hovering over his, then gently covering it. Her skin was warm, work-roughened. It was the first time she had touched him since he was a toddler. "You learn, Kyon. One day at a time. You don't have to have it all figured out. Just… be honest. With her. With yourself. The rest… you're the smartest, toughest person I know. You'll find your footing."

He turned his hand over, clasping hers. The connection was electric, painful, and healing. They sat in silence for a long moment, in a dingy diner in Cincinnati, mother and son, finding a new, fragile geometry.

On the drive back to Detroit, his phone buzzed. A text from Alana.

Finished a new sketch. It's called "Phantom, at Rest." Thinking of you.

He smiled. He felt, for the first time, the terrifying, wonderful weight of a life expanding beyond the ring. The championship belt was in a closet. The money was in an account. The ghosts of Thorne and Solano lingered at the edges. But in the center, there was a new, complex, living picture forming: a man with a mother's tentative love in one hand, and an artist's phone number in the other, standing at a window, deciding what kind of view he wanted to build for himself.

The next fight would come. Trigger Monroe. Unification. The biggest stage yet. But for now, Kyon Wilson, 11-1, world champion, was learning a new discipline: how to be a man outside the ropes. And it was the hardest, most rewarding training camp of his life.

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