Long ago, in a prefecture far, far away... or maybe just nearby, there existed a high school so wicked, so atrocious, so devastatingly delinquent that the mere sight of it could turn the most timid student into a trembling leaf. Its name? Ishiyama High School. A place where rules were optional, fists were the currency, and the lunchroom was a battleground.
And so, in this crucible of chaos, the stage was set for one of the most absurd, horrifying, and undeniably hilarious tales ever witnessed by mankind.
Enter Tatsumi Oga.
Oga strode into the schoolyard, shoulders squared, a determined scowl plastered on his face. On his back sat the green-haired bundle of doom: Beelzebub IV, the infant destined to destroy humanity, yet currently fascinated by the sway of Oga's coat. The baby yawned lazily, emitting a soft squeak that could have been mistaken for innocence—if anyone dared to mistake a demon lord for innocence.
Two lanky thugs, faces dotted with acne and bravado, stepped into his path. Their knuckles cracked.
"Oi," one sneered. "Whatcha carrying, kid? That a—"
Oga's hand shot into his pocket, pulling out a shiny object.
The thugs froze. Eyes wide, mouths slightly ajar.
It wasn't a knife.
It was a baby rattle.
"...A rattle?" one hissed, the bravado faltering. "Don't tell me—"
"You brought a knife to school?" Oga interrupted, raising an eyebrow. His voice was low, dangerous, and just mad enough to make the thugs second-guess life decisions.
The two exchanged glances. "Nah, it's just... a toy," the other whispered. They snickered, childish and mean-spirited, thinking they had Oga sized up.
And that's when Oga smiled. Not the friendly, nice-guy smile. The "I'm going to destroy everything you love in under five seconds" smile.
Smack!
The rattle swung in his hand, connecting with the first thug's jaw. He crumpled like wet paper.
Wham!
The second thug tried to run. Oga twirled, rattle in hand, and clocked him square in the temple. He hit the ground with a satisfying thud.
All the while, Oga whispered softly over his shoulder:
"Don't wake the brat."
Beel, perched atop his back, blinked slowly and gave a tiny coo of approval.
The students scattered. Whispers rose like smoke from a fire. "That... that's Oga Tatsumi." "The delinquent who can beat anyone while carrying a baby." "The... father?"
And thus began the school life of Tatsumi Oga: high school student, delinquent, and unwilling father.
In the shadow of this chaos, another figure leaned casually against the school fence. Elegant, composed, and utterly unreadable. A smile played across his lips, almost imperceptible but sharp enough to make your soul itch.
Kogen.
He observed the scene with amusement, a subtle twinkle in his eye. Not yet intervening, he simply watched as Oga's unrefined "parenting" instincts clashed spectacularly with the horrors of Ishiyama High.
Oh, what a delightful mess, he mused internally. So many fireworks, so little effort... I must savor this.
Oga, ignoring the whispers and lingering gazes, turned to Furuichi, who had been panting behind him like a tired dog.
"Oi, idiot. You keeping up?" Oga said.
Furuichi panted harder. "I... I... barely. And why the hell do you have a baby on your back while fighting delinquent goons with a rattle?!"
Oga smirked. "Because apparently, I'm its dad now. Tatsumi Oga. Normal high school student. Delinquent. And father to the most destructive baby in the universe. Got it?"
Furuichi's eyes widened. "Normal? Delinquent? Father?! Which one is true? None of that makes sense!"
"Exactly," Oga replied with a dramatic shrug. "Life's a mess. Deal with it."
Beel shifted slightly, leaning closer to Oga's neck, sparking faint arcs of electricity. Oga shivered, muttering, "And don't even think about shocking me. We've got a reputation to keep."
The two walked onward into the storm of Ishiyama High, their steps echoing against the cracked pavement, the whispers of onlookers trailing them like the soundtrack of an epic tragedy... or a very absurd comedy.
Somewhere above, Kogen's smile widened just a fraction. The boy's ignorance is a symphony. And I, the audience, shall enjoy every note.
Gag Introduction Montage
Oga's intro: Dramatic pose, fists clenched, rattle held like a weapon. Narration: "The man who fights, the man who bears the child of the Demon Lord... the legend begins."
Furuichi: Flailing behind, narration: "The idiot, sidekick, and frequent casualty of Oga's terrible judgment."
Beel: Calm, then chaotic sparks erupting randomly, narration: "The young master. One cry from him, and chaos reigns."
Kogen: Watching from shadows, barely moving, narration: "And the mother. Elegant, cunning, smiling, and dangerous. Never interferes... yet cannot resist a show."
Oga strode toward the school building, shoulders squared, the baby firmly strapped to his back.
"High school, huh?" he muttered. "Let's see what you've got."
Furuichi groaned. "Why do I always get dragged into these disasters?!"
And so, the stage was set: Oga versus Ishiyama High, Beel on his back, Kogen lurking with quiet amusement, and Furuichi... well, Furuichi would probably survive somehow.
Thus began the daily, absurd, and violent comedy of Tatsumi Oga and the Demon Lord Beelzebub.