◆◆
Without saying a word, he raised his hand and pressed his palm against a panel engraved with a crest. It was a hidden space connected to Gowon's study—more precisely, a door designed to look like a bookshelf. A short recognition tone sounded. Beep— Through a system that only he could access, he opened the door.
It was a place I had never seen before.
The moment I stepped inside, I felt that something was wrong.
Dark wood. Matte metal. Heavy fabric. Under dim lighting, the room was filled with taxidermied animals hanging everywhere, their empty eyes staring into nothingness. My mind kept conjuring disturbing images of sharp tools hidden inside the drawers. And then, in one corner, I noticed a pristine white bed—so clean it didn't even have a single stain.
This was Gowon's isolated, secret world—one whose meaning only he fully understood.
Run.
It felt like someone was whispering that to me.
The moment I turned to bolt out, the door—left slightly ajar—slammed shut, as if to tell me not to expect any hope.
Is it really true that even if you enter a tiger's den, you can survive as long as you keep your wits about you?
It seems like it's time to test that.
Gowon slowly approached me as I stood with my back pressed against the door.
I couldn't even breathe properly. I stood frozen in place, like someone turned to stone.
I forced myself into a kind of self-hypnosis. I will not show him fear. I will walk out of this place alive.
Without stepping back even an inch, I steadied my breathing and looked straight at him.
"What kind of place is this?"
"My hobby room."
"That's quite a dangerous hobby. It doesn't seem very good for your mental state."
Ignoring my attempt to ease the tension, he stepped closer.
My heart pounded loudly.
"You don't even know what might happen to you today, and you're worried about that?"
Before I could even swallow my breath, he lifted my hands upward and pushed my body against the wall.
Thud.
My back hit hard. My breath caught in my throat. I barely managed to suppress a scream.
"Why… are you doing this?"
Gowon twisted his lips into something like a smile, but the anger beneath it was impossible to hide.
"You are someone I have the right to do whatever I want with."
In one swift motion, he tore open my blouse. Several buttons fell to the floor, making sharp clicking sounds as they hit.
He didn't show even the slightest consideration for a woman's dignity.
That's right. A branch. A maid. A plaything.
To him, I was nothing more than that.
"How dare someone like you think you want anything from me."
"I never wanted anything."
"Didn't you want my forgiveness? Didn't you want your freedom? Just like now—daring to look me straight in the eye, wanting an answer from me."
"..."
"There is no more mercy left for you."
His large hand gripped my face firmly. Without giving me a chance to escape, he tilted my chin upward and pressed his lips down harshly.
I tried not to accept it, but the more I resisted, the deeper he forced his way in.
His height, his build, even the weight of his breath—everything about him was overwhelming, far beyond what I could endure in a single breath.
Just how much humiliation would it take to calm his anger? To satisfy his curiosity about me?
As my body slid down the wall, he quickly grabbed both of my arms and lifted me effortlessly. Then he threw me onto the bed like I was nothing more than baggage.
He said nothing, but his clenched fists and roughened breathing already revealed his anger.
The way he tore at my clothes was like a wolf ripping the hide off its prey.
I let my body go limp, like a corpse, and looked up at his face.
Fear—beyond simple fear—made me think rationally. It forced survival into me.
I will never give you what you want. Treat me like I'm boring. Get sick of me. Hurry.
But he paid no attention to my dull reaction. Instead, he wore a cold smile, as if amused by it.
"What should I do? I actually find your strange, dull behavior amusing."
He had already figured everything out.
The moment I realized that, the expression I had hidden so tightly began to crack, fear seeping through. My fingers turned white from how tightly I clenched them, and my eyes trembled uncontrollably.
Meanwhile, his eyes shone.
Like a beast anticipating its prey.
"It seems your acting is starting to lose its strength."
"..."
"Now I can see it. Just how afraid you really are."
"How long are you going to keep humiliating me?"
He reached out and lifted my chin again. Unable to resist, I looked straight into his eyes.
"I never intended to let you go in the first place."
"..."
"So stop trying to think your way out of this and focus on pleasing me. Properly."
My teeth ground together softly. Defiance and fear tangled together inside me. My lips trembled, but no words came out.
"You need to open it so I can put it in, don't you?"
His voice was low. A command disguised as a whisper.
He didn't force my mouth open. Instead, he used my position against me—making me do it myself.
I shut my eyes tightly and opened my mouth. My fists trembled in humiliation.
Heat entered my mouth.
There was no room to refuse. The pressure was overwhelming.
"That won't do if you just hold it there."
He never stated what he wanted directly. He forced me to understand and act on my own.
There had never been a choice given to me. If I wanted to survive, I had to do what he wanted.
Anger and deep humiliation filled my gaze.
He glanced aside briefly, a clear look of dissatisfaction crossing his face.
Then he grabbed my hair and lifted my head slightly. Our eyes met. His gaze was ice-cold.
"You're still not very good."
At that moment, something surged up inside me.
I realized something.
I had still been holding onto hope.
A life worse than ordinary. Sleeping alone in a damp, cramped, dark room—I thought I had already given everything up.
But I hadn't.
Holding onto the gift that had once been given to me.
Meeting Go Chaeha's warmth and kindness.
Even in the moments I barely survived beside Gowon—
I had still held onto hope.
And when that hope shattered again, it hurt unbearably.
Was it something I never should have held onto?
Even self-loathing followed.
I spoke with my eyes.
Stop. Please stop.
But Gowon paid no attention. Like someone desperate to hurt me, he moved purely on instinct.
Soon, his expression tightened—
and heat flooded into my mouth.
Once.
I spat everything I had been holding in my mouth onto the bed.
Before I could even gather myself, his hand slid along my inner thigh like a snake. Instinctively, I closed my legs.
"I don't want to continue."
Gowon's brow furrowed, as if it was only natural.
He brushed his hair back and stood up.
"You're troublesome to the end."
He opened the drawer beside the bed and took out a rope.
"Your Highness, what are you—"
Before I could twist away, he silently raised both my arms above my head and bound them tightly. Then he tied my ankles as well. I couldn't move anymore.
"This is punishment. What you deserve."
So my first instinct had been right.
The first day I saw him—
my body had already recognized something it should never have encountered.
Pain flashed across my face as he entered me again.
At the same time, an unfamiliar heat flickered deep within my eyes.
From the very beginning, he had never intended to spare me.
The force was so strong it felt like my body would break apart.
But the tears that fell were not from pain.
They came from helplessness.
Time lost its meaning in this closed space.
I could only tell that time had passed from the tightening sensation below.
The pain gradually turned into something else.
Pleasure.
It broke a person down mercilessly.
Hatred. Anger. Everything—like embracing someone you love.
The relentless pressure.
The obscene, low moans.
My body bent under the rhythm of his movements.
◆
I couldn't tell whether the sweat soaking the sheets came from my back or from her.
Looking down at her, she no longer resisted. She simply accepted everything.
But my anger did not stop.
Each time I thought of that article, something deep inside me boiled violently.
The thought that my secret had been thrown out into the world.
The frustration that I couldn't push away this woman who kept throwing me into confusion.
Confusion.
Fear.
And… something I couldn't explain.
Why.
Why you?
Seonmi's cheeks were flushed. The tear tracks running down them remained like burn marks.
Ignoring her twisted expression, I deliberately continued.
Not affection.
Just release.
You are nothing more than my toy.
The air grew unbearably hot.
As our bodies remained in contact longer, it became impossible to tell who was feeling what—who was angry, who was heated.
The Seonmi who had once stood rigid with tension, glaring sharply, was gone.
She looked like a tamed cat—
but rather than being tamed, it felt as though she had simply adapted.
As if our hearts were beating in the same rhythm.
Her hands clung to my back.
And I didn't let her go.
"Ha… ha…"
Her breathing grew rough.
Her shoulders trembled slightly.
Her hair clung to her forehead.
Her eyes were half-closed.
She looked like she couldn't endure any longer.
I looked down at her face for a moment.
The room was silent.
Only our rough breathing filled it.
When her head began to droop, I lifted her chin gently.
Her face came back into my view.
Disheveled hair.
Red eyes.
Lips struggling to catch breath.
I've seen that expression many times.
Animals wear it just before they die.
But I am different.
I move for myself.
I drive the blade in once more and take their life.
Only then does it truly become mine.
And yet—
her expression only stirred my hunting instincts further.
You've seen the darkness inside me.
So with you…
I feel like I can do anything.
After all—
my eyes and ears belong only to me.
I leaned closer and whispered into her ear.
"Don't lose consciousness. We're not even close to done yet."