She was lost.
She'd been called into realm she did not feel comfortable in. Most of time when she's summoned, it's never for good reason.
And in this moment, as Himiko stood in front of the door of superintendent Isamu's office, she feared it was another one of those times.
Knock, knock.
"Come in."
I entered the office expecting to be chewed out for missing paperwork again or something.
"Take a seat."
In an effort to not waste any of her time, I quickly placed myself on the seat.
"You're always worried that you're wasting others' time aren't you"
How did she-?
"You remind me of how I used to be when I was a young woman." there was a sense of nostalgia in her voice as she closed her eyes pondering her youth.
"I understand why you feel the need to pander to others the way you do. In this line of work, us women need to work twice as hard to build our way up the hierarchy, and I've seen how hard you work, from the way you always try to help out around the office, from the overtime you clock day in, day out and during the invasion."
She leaned in to address me personally.
"You rushed straight out to help those in need, knowing the risks. That's bold and honestly, we need more of that."
"So, I just wanted to take the time out to thank you for all your hard work."
It felt gratifying. My Dad would love to hear this; her daughter's hard work being recognised by the top brass.
"Thank you, Superintendent, it is an honour to hear you say that and I promise my hard work won't end here."
I rose from my seat with haste was halted.
"Wait, before you go, I wanted to ask you something."
Her face moulded into one of curiosity.
"Why did you decide to join the police force?"
"Because I want to help people."
"The real reason."
I've never had the chance to tell someone what I wanted regarding my career choices.
"I come from a long line of police officers, typically it would fall on the men but because I'm an only child, I was forced into it."
Dad always wanted a son. He never said that to me – of course not – but I could tell, so I had to do my best not to disappoint him. I couldn't not join the force it would kill the Suzuki name.
"When it came to my career prospects, I never really had a say, work hard, study hard. That was the motto in my life."
Her face turned less a curiosity grin to one of intense intrigue.
"Is this truly what you want? What does Himiko Suzuki want?"
If I were to be completely honest with myself, I don't know what it is I want to do. I looked down at my lap, pitying myself.
The superintendent seemed to recognise that I was deep in thought and leaned back in her seat.
"My parents ran a store in Hatake. My whole life it felt like I was going to live the rest of it in the countryside, in a quiet town, the whole time in that shop. Until one day I decided that I didn't want to. Don't get me wrong, I love the place, my family and the store. But I wanted to live in the city, experience the lights, the people and get a job that made me feel happy. So, in the end, I could come to end of my life, a happy woman."
"If there's not a specific thing you want, then ask yourself to do what your heart desires, follow what feels right to you, and if the police force is what feels right then by all means, carry on. But based on the look on your face, I'm guessing that's not the case."
It was like she could read my soul and know exactly what I was looking for. I looked up at her with a smile on my face. What do I want to do?
"Thank you, superintendent."
"Call me Makoto. Also, you're free to take the rest of the day off, you've earned it."
I stood up and stepped out the office a much happier woman than when I walked in.
Once I arrived back home, I felt the urge to talk to my parents. It's strange, it's not like it's been a while, I called them straight after the invasion just to let them know I was safe, but I just feel like calling them again. I'm not sure it's as a result of the conversation with the superintendent or maybe because of the incident with the invasion but regardless, I picked up the phone and dialled home.
"Hello?"
"Hi mum it's Himi-"
"OH MY GOD, HIMIKO. HOW ARE YOU?"
I had to hold my phone at arm's length just so I didn't go deaf.
"I'm fine, I'm fine."
"how's life treating you in the big city?"
"It's good, it's definitely a lot different than back home but I like it, I'm missing you though. I've been working a lot of overtime so hopefully I get some extra holiday hours."
"We all can't wait to see you again, also, your father wants to know how things are going in the force."
"It's going... great, the superintended recognised the hard work I've been putting in and called me into her office to thank me."
"THAT'S GREAT!! Wait 'till I tell your father, he's out right now, but as soon as he's back, I'll let him know, ooohh, he'll be so proud."
I bit my lip, those words arousing my conflicting feelings, most importantly, the most important thing in the whole world... Just making them proud. Of what I'm contributing to the world. Of me.
"Hey mum, about... the force-"
Knock, knock, knock.
It was from the front door.
"Sorry, I'll call you back, someone's at the door."
I put the phone down and made my way to the front door. I peered through the peep hole on the door to see who it was.
Two men, dressed in suits, they looked like secret agents, like they were here for serious business. Is it from the office? What are they here for?
I unlocked the door, cautiously opening it to greet them.
"Miss Suzuki, don't worry, I know we might look intimidating, but we're just here to bring you a job opportunity, you were recommended to us by one of our associates, apparently the two of you know each other well."
Job opportunity? Two men, dressed like the mafia show up for a job opportunity?
"We're part of a newly formed international organisation, we heard you were on the ground when the aliens came. It's part of the reason why you were recommended."
International organisation? Recommendation? What the hell are they talking about?
"We're from the Ministry of Extraterrestrial Investigation, MEI for short, we'd like to invite you to our organisation as a fully-fledged associate. What do you say?"
Exactly...
What do you say?
"Sure."