Blinded by a sudden flash of light, I reflexively squeezed my eyes shut.
In that instant, the air around me shifted. When I opened my eyes again…
"A-Aaaah! Fuuuck!!!"
I was falling from the sky.
Of course, I didn't have a parachute, and the more I flailed, the faster I seemed to fall.
'Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit...!!'
As I plummeted toward the ground, my childhood memories flashed through my mind like a video on fast-forward.
Was this my life flashing before my eyes?
The wave of memories brought back things I had long forgotten, replaying them in vivid detail.
I remembered confessing to the girl who sat next to me on the first day of elementary school and getting rejected. I remembered falling for a third-year girl in my second year of middle school, confessing, and getting beaten up by her friends. I even remembered asking a college girl I met at the library for a date in high school, only to get completely ghosted. All of it came flooding back.
'...Seriously, why is this crap all I can remember?'
This wasn't my life flashing before my eyes; this was a public shaming!
"Gah!"
Just as I was resigning myself to gravity and enjoying my parachute-less skydive, something grabbed me by the scruff of my neck, and my fall came to an abrupt halt in mid-air.
I looked around, trying to figure out what was going on, but it was hard to get my bearings in a dark, cave-like place with no lights.
Before I could even process the string of inexplicable events, my body was slowly descending toward the ground.
When my feet finally touched the hard floor, the reality that I had survived washed over me.
It's true what they say: even a life in the gutter is better than being dead.
"But where am I..."
"Excuse me..."
"?!"
Just as I was fumbling in my pocket for my phone to use its flashlight, a woman's voice cut through the darkness.
"Who's there...?"
Given the location, my voice was tense.
A woman's voice, appearing out of nowhere in this gloomy, dark place, reminded me of the opening scene of a horror movie I'd seen the other day, which only made me more nervous.
Step, step.
In response to my wary tone, the sound of footsteps emerged from the darkness, growing steadily closer.
When she was close enough to touch, I could finally see her with my own eyes.
"...Whoa."
Her blonde hair, visible even in the darkness, and her green eyes staring intently at me gave her a striking, exotic look.
On top of that, she was so beautiful it left me speechless.
There was just one thing... her ears were a bit unusual.
'Her ears are a bit long...?'
She looked just like an elf from a fantasy novel.
"...An elf?"
Her appearance was like something out of a game, as if she were cosplaying a character.
But it didn't take long for me to realize it wasn't cosplay when her long ears twitched, full of life.
She was a real elf.
"A p-person...?"
Just as I was surprised to see an elf, she seemed equally shocked to see me.
Thankfully, she didn't seem to be one of those arrogant elves; I didn't sense any hostility in her gaze.
No, she was too beautiful to be one of them.
"Hello...?" I asked cautiously.
"...You spoke?"
"Pardon?"
The elf girl stared at me with a somewhat dazed look in her eyes.
"Excuse me?"
"...You spoke again."
Something seemed off about her.
She seemed a bit out of it, you know?
'Anyway, where am I?'
It was too dark to see my surroundings properly.
"Excuse me, do you know where..."
"...A living person."
While I was distracted, the elf girl had moved right in front of me and was now kneading my hand, looking at it as if it were some strange curiosity.
Her touch was incredibly soft, a world away from my own rough hands.
"That's right. I'm only twenty-one..."
Before I could finish, the elf girl suddenly threw herself into my arms.
"Hic...!"
I was already baffled by her sudden hug, but now she was crying.
Is this what it feels like to be at a loss? I wondered. Her shoulders were trembling violently, so I just quietly patted her back and waited for her to calm down.
'What is happening...'
I was certain that today would go down as the most chaotic and absurd day of my twenty-one years of life.
*
"Sob, hic..."
"Are you calm now?"
"Y-Yes..."
"Are you done crying?"
"I-I wasn't crying!"
"But my shirt is all wet."
"Gasp! Oh, what do I do... I-I'll dry it for you!"
As the elf girl touched the part of my chest soaked with her tears, a warm breeze flowed from her palm.
'Magic...?'
Mages were so rare that this was the first time I'd ever seen magic up close.
Thanks to the breeze from her palm, my shirt was dry in an instant, as if it had never been wet at all.
"Thank you."
"N-No, it's fine. I'm the one who dirtied it..."
She said she'd dirtied it, but from my perspective, the tears of a stunningly beautiful elf were anything but dirty.
'This is the first time my clothes have ever smelled this good.'
Why did my shirt smell like flowers?
It was truly strange.
Of course, there were countless other things that were even stranger.
Starting with the existence of the elf girl right in front of me, and the fact that I, who had been in my studio apartment, had ended up here after a parachute-less skydive.
No matter how much I wracked my brain, there was only one possible answer.
'The Another World Dating App.'
It was logical to assume that this app on my phone was the cause.
Anyone else would call me crazy, but right now, it was the only way to explain this phenomenon.
This probably wasn't Earth, either. There are no elves on Earth.
Then again, as an ordinary person, what did I know? Maybe there were elves on Earth.
But they probably didn't live near my house.
"Um..."
"Yes?"
While I was lost in thought, the elf girl was looking up at me.
And with a very intense gaze.
It was the first time a beautiful woman had ever looked at me like that, and I felt a little nervous.
"Y-You're a person, right? A real person??"
"Uh... yeah? Do monsters that look like people show up here or something?"
I remembered hearing about monsters like that in my Magical Biology class back in school.
"N-No! It's not that... It's just that I've never seen anyone else here besides myself..."
"Here?"
I looked around.
It was still dark, but my eyes were starting to adjust, and I could make out the surrounding scenery.
It was a massive cave. Or a cavern? Something like that.
"How on earth did you get here?"
"...I'm not really sure myself."
I didn't have the confidence to coherently explain that I'd been transported to another dimension because of a dating app I'd downloaded for fun and expect her to believe me.
'So, is she really 500 years old?'
The elf girl looked to be about my age, but since I'd set the age range to 500 when I matched, I couldn't rule out the possibility that she was somewhere around that age.
She was definitely an elf; I couldn't see a single wrinkle, not even a pore.
Was she constantly using some kind of anti-aging magic?
"Where is this place?"
As time passed, the scenery became clearer.
The space was so vast that our voices echoed whenever we spoke, and I could see strange, ancient-looking ruins scattered about.
What kind of place was this?
"This... is a prison."
"A prison?"
The elf girl's expression darkened slightly.
"It's an underground cavern in the deepest part of the holy land where the World Tree has taken root. It's being used as a prison now, but..."
The World Tree? Did she mean that giant tree that always shows up in comics and anime?
'So those tree roots growing here and there are the roots of the World Tree?'
The thought of digging up a small piece to brew and drink grew stronger and stronger. It seemed like it would be far more effective than any elixir on the market.
If its effects could be proven, I could probably make a fortune selling it at an auction.
Of course, I had a feeling the elf girl would tear me limb from limb if I tried, so I decided to keep that thought to myself.
"Still, for a prison, I don't see any other inmates."
In the first place, it didn't even look like a prison. There were no iron bars or guards.
"...To be honest, it would be more accurate to call it solitary confinement. Any criminal whose crimes are heinous enough to be sent here would be better off executed."
I was curious why she was locked up alone in a prison that even the worst criminals didn't get sent to, but seeing her still-pale face, I didn't have the courage to ask.
"Ahem, well, shall we introduce ourselves first?"
"...Ah."
I held out my hand, hoping to lighten the mood.
"My name is Kang Hyun-woo. As you can see, I'm human, and I turned twenty-one this year."
Thankfully, the elf girl took my hand right away.
"I-I am! Iris Remeria Baiart Peledia!"
"...Pardon?"
What? Was she a noble?
A person's name with that many syllables... The problem of what to call her was enough to split my head in two.
"...Is it okay if I call you Iris?"
"Ah, yes!"
My memory wasn't good enough to memorize a name that was practically a full sentence, like something out of European nobility.
Fortunately, Iris seemed strangely pleased.
A beautiful woman's smile had a way of lifting my own spirits.
It was a pure, gentle smile, free of the malice I saw in the fake smiles of the girls at school.
I'd been dragged into this unbelievable situation because of a shady app, but maybe it wasn't so bad after all. Just as I was thinking that...
Tiring-
A familiar notification sound came from my pocket.
'Isn't this a place without Wi-Fi, let alone a cell signal?'
I discreetly pulled out my phone to check.
[Thank you for using the Another World Dating App.]
[As a special offer for our first-time customers, this app provides a free dating consulting curriculum.]
[Do you agree?]
[Y/Y]
"What...?"
[If there is no response, you will automatically accept in a moment.]
[3, 2, 1…]
[Y]
[Analyzing the disposition of Iris Remeria Baiart Peledia.]
[Analyzing...]
[Analysis Complete.]
[Name: Iris Remeria Baiart Peledia
Age: 524
Affiliation: EB-17
Occupation: Mage
Disposition: Benevolent Ruler, Pacifism, Devotion, Vegetarianism...]
The selection screen, which offered no real choice, vanished in an instant, replaced by a display of Iris's information, just like an NPC's profile in a game.
'...There's not much here.'
I already knew her name from her introduction.
Her race and age were exactly what I'd put in the survey when I matched, though she was twenty-four years older than 500. Not that it mattered much.
"What is that?"
Iris had crept closer at some point and was now looking at my phone with sparkling eyes.
I quickly returned to the home screen.
"Ah, this is..."
Tiring-
Just as I was about to explain what a phone was to Iris, trying my best not to create any misunderstandings, a new screen popped up.
[Detected the past history of Iris Remeria Baiart Peledia.]
[Initiating advanced studies for the dating consulting curriculum.]
[Initiating past monologue.]
'...What?'
Confused by the app's explanation, I immediately checked on Iris.
"H-Hey, Iris...? Iris??"
I waved my hand in front of her face and called her name, but she didn't respond.
She just stared blankly into the distance.
She looked just like one of those heroines from an H-manga who'd fallen victim to a hypnosis app.
The genre suddenly felt like it was shifting from a sweet, pure love story with a beautiful elf to a brutal tale of human depravity.
"I..."
As I was wondering what to do, Iris began to speak in a low, heavy tone.
"I was the queen of the Peledeia Kingdom."