"Hey, old man, you are really killing the vibe."
Demon-Vic stepped in front of Dracula, tanking a massive hit from a Kraken tentacle. He shook out his numbed claw, his scarlet eyes shooting a glare of pure annoyance at Van Helsing on the high platform.
His massive fish tail slapped the water impatiently, kicking up waves.
"Can't you see we're in the middle of a forbidden, cross-species romance here? Read the room!"
As he complained, Vic swung his claws, swatting away another tentacle trying to sneak attack them.
"Oh, Vic."
Dracula, hovering in mid-air with Ericka in his arms, visibly relaxed when he saw Vic step in.
He looked Vic up and down, taking in the grotesque yet strangely aesthetic demonic form. He offered a genuine compliment:
"Honestly, this look is an improvement. Much more handsome than your usual face! Though... it does look oddly familiar..."
Dracula tilted his head slightly, a thoughtful look in his eyes as he trawled through thousands of years of memory.
"I feel like... I saw something similar a few thousand years ago? Ah! I remember now!"
He clapped his hands, enlightened.
"It was that creature being chased around by a crippled old man with a cane! Extremely bad temper. What was her name again? Barbara? Or... Martha?"
Vic played along, scratching his chin with a giant claw, feigning deep thought.
"Hmm... let me think. I read the name somewhere recently. I think it was... Makka Pakka?"
"Oh! Yes, yes, yes!"
Dracula nodded vigorously, looking at Vic with admiration for his memory.
"That sounds right! I heard she got sealed away in some dusty corner of the world later."
Deep in the Netherworld, pinned down by Tso Lan and Di Kui, Bai Tza heard this conversation that was wrong on a galactic level. She was so furious her entire demonic body shifted from spectral blue to a bruised purple.
Her tentacles twitched violently as she let out a scream so high-pitched it cracked:
"Slander!!! They are slandering me!!! My name is Bai Tza! I am the noble Water Demon! Not Makka-freaking-Pakka!!!"
Tso Lan was using all his strength to suppress his sister, who was about to go nuclear. A vein throbbed on his forehead. He found this conversation incredibly headache-inducing.
Di Kui, while helping hold Bai Tza down, turned his rocky head and asked Tso Lan in his slow, muffled voice:
"Big Brother, when did Second Sister change her name? How come I didn't know? And didn't she always tell us she fought that old man with the cane to a draw? She said she almost snapped his cane in half."
Tso Lan: "..."
He felt his demonic career facing an unprecedented challenge—
Not from the Immortal Gods, but from the combined IQ of his teammates and the nonsense of his enemies.
"Shut up, Di Kui!"
Tso Lan hissed through his teeth.
"And Hsi Wu! Stop laughing! Help us!"
Hsi Wu, the Sky Demon, was already rolling on the ground, his bat wings twitching. He clutched his stomach, letting out gasping, screeching laughter that sounded like he was dying. He waved his hand desperately while laughing:
"I... I can't... Kee-hee-hee... Let me laugh for a bit... In thousands of years in Hell... Gah... I haven't heard anything this funny... Makka Pakka... Bwahahaha... Second Sister, I didn't know you had a stage name?!"
Bai Tza: "!!!!!!"
She snapped completely. Her struggle was so violent that Tso Lan and Di Kui almost lost their grip.
"I will kill them! I will absolutely kill them!!!"
Back in Atlantis, Vic and Dracula had no idea they had just started a riot in Hell. They continued their chat casually.
"But anyway—"
Vic flicked his tail, looking at Ericka in Dracula's arms. His scarlet eyes gleamed with the light of gossip.
"Uncle Drac, you got game! It hasn't even been that long, and you already got the Captain jumping off cliffs for you?"
A rare blush appeared on Dracula's pale face. He coughed awkwardly but didn't loosen his hold on Ericka in the slightest.
Ericka, on the other hand, was bold. Though her face was flushed, she looked bravely at Vic, her eyes clear.
"Vic, thank you. And... I'm sorry for lying to you before."
"Eh, no biggie!"
Vic waved a claw dismissively.
"We're all family now anyway! Right, Uncle Drac?"
He winked mischievously.
"But first things first, we gotta deal with the stubborn old man upstairs who insists on breaking up the happy couple, and this disobedient calamari."
He looked up at the Kraken, which was going berserk again, and at Van Helsing on the platform, whose face was livid as he prepared an even more terrible tune. Vic cracked his neck, the bones popping loudly.
"Uncle Drac, take Captain Ericka somewhere safe and make out or something."
"Leave this to me and my 'pets!'"
Before he even finished speaking, the dozen stone beasts, powered by the Rat Talisman, threw themselves at the Kraken with renewed vigor!
Although their attacks were still chaotic, their sheer numbers and size were enough to keep the Kraken occupied, preventing it from focusing all its rage on Vic and Dracula.
Watching the chaotic, energetic scene, a manic grin spread across Vic's demonic face.
"Heh, I love a good gang beating!"
His massive fish tail slammed the water, launching his body like an arrow from a bow. He charged straight at the Kraken!
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Vic's fists, covered in spectral blue scales and wrapped in immense power, slammed into the incoming tentacles like sledgehammers!
Every collision created a dull boom and visible shockwaves, churning the surrounding seawater into countless whirlpools.
"Haha! That's the stuff!" Vic laughed excitedly, madness flickering in his red eyes.
WHAM!
Before Vic could finish laughing, a tentacle as thick as a mountain range whipped around with unstoppable force and a howling wind. It smacked squarely into his demonic body!
CRASH—!
With a muffled thud, Vic didn't have time to liquefy. He was smashed into the seabed, kicking up a massive cloud of debris and dust.
"Hahaha! Yes! Exactly like that! Smack him!"
In Hell, Bai Tza, who was previously pinned by Tso Lan and Di Kui, saw this satisfying scene and erupted in a cheer of pure ecstasy. The burst of strength sent the unprepared Tso Lan and Di Kui flying!
Di Kui rolled clumsily on the ground twice. He shook his rock-encrusted head as he got up and mumbled to Tso Lan, who was floating back down gracefully:
"Big Brother, I think... Second Sister has actually lost it."
Tso Lan straightened his robes expressionlessly. His crimson eyes showed a weariness that had seen too much. He waved his hand in resignation.
"Forget it. Leave her be. In the endless eternity of Hell, every demon goes a little mad eventually. It was only a matter of time."
He didn't even bother trying to restrain Bai Tza anymore. He just floated to the side and watched the scrying mirror silently, his attitude screaming: Whatever happens, happens.
---
In the ruins of Atlantis, Vic climbed out of the crater. He rolled his shoulder, which was tingling slightly, and wiped the water and dust from his face. His scarlet eyes were full of annoyance.
"Damn! Local monsters have no manners. Hitting me before I finish my monologue?"
He muttered, but his gaze sharpened.
That hit made it clear: relying solely on the "pets" created by the Monkey and Rat Talismans wasn't going to cut it against an ancient titan of this level.
It was time to get serious.