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"Save! Save me! Yuyuko! Ran!"
Yukari Yakumo's shrill, blood-curdling screams echoed violently from the peaceful farm cottage, piercing the quiet night exactly like a tortured banshee. Outside in the dark, an inconspicuous, leafy large oak tree shook violently, and a dark shadow heavily fell from its high branches with a dull thud.
Aya Shameimaru frantically climbed up from the dirt, aggressively adjusted her red tokin hat, and immediately rushed directly to the living room window with her heavy camera, pressing the shutter button so incredibly fast the mechanical flash almost started smoking in the dark!
"Big news, big news! The ancient Sage of Youkai is actually violently tied to an interrogation chair and loudly crying from the brutal torture! These agonizing screams, this terrified expression—it's absolutely too real! This is definitely not a fake act to maliciously lure me out! No way, absolutely even if I tragically end up tied to this terrifying chair one day, I completely have to report this breaking news!"
Constantly, frantically snapping high-definition photos of Yukari Yakumo's completely distorted, tear-streaked expression through the glass, Aya Shameimaru's own expression gradually became dangerously crazed and manic. The glorious, golden light of a journalistic martyr seemed to physically shine upon her; for the absolute sake of this front-page news, she was completely, fully prepared to suffer a brutal death at Yukari Yakumo's hands tomorrow!
"Ran!"
Inside the brightly lit house, the pitch of Yukari Yakumo's screaming voice became completely, horrifically distorted. That freezing cold, unyielding steel fascia knife absolutely didn't just feel like it was violently scraping her soft flesh, but rather exactly like an industrial grinder aggressively grinding down her ancient bones—and it was brutally grinding both of her unexercised legs at the exact same time! The massive level of physical pain was so incredibly intense that she would infinitely rather take a direct, explosive beating from Yuuka Kazami than endure a single second more of this machine!
"I... let me desperately see... found it, the massive emergency stop button!"
Ran Yakumo frantically, violently flipped through the thick, translated manual and soon found the mechanical solution. Strictly following the red-text instructions, she aggressively kicked the massive red button located heavily on the side of the leather massage chair.
P-THUNK! Hiss...
The massive chair stopped completely, immediately. The terrifying, cold mechanical arms rapidly retracted into the base, and the heavy metallic locks violently binding Yukari Yakumo's flailing limbs snapped completely open. Absolutely everything mechanically returned to exactly how it was before the nightmare started.
"My legs! I absolutely can't physically feel my legs! My back! My back is so incredibly tight too! Wuwuwu, Ran, am I going to actually die?!"
At this exact, humiliating moment, Yukari Yakumo's upper clothes were completely lifted, visibly revealing her pale back, which was terrifyingly covered in massive, completely neatly arranged, dark red Fire Cups. It was truly an incredibly brutal, high-tech athletic recovery product of the Mejiro family; exactly as long as a person lies on it and heavily sets the digital program, the massive massage chair can automatically, mechanically perform various intense, ancient massage techniques using robotics.
With the loud, popping sound of suction releasing (Pop! Pop! Pop!), Ran Yakumo walked over with a pained expression and forcefully pulled the heavy glass Fire Cups off exactly one by one, setting them gently aside. Yukari Yakumo finally, exhaustingly struggled to sit up, her legs completely like jelly, and was heavily carried over to the soft velvet sofa to collapse.
"So incredibly comfortable~"
Leo's gentle, custom massage on the other chair had also finally finished with a pleasant chime. Feeling incredibly light and relaxed all over, Leo sat up and completely stretched his limbs with a massive yawn. He had definitely, clearly heard Yukari Yakumo's agonizing screams, but he was completely feeling far too incredibly good at the time to physically care. Anyway, it absolutely wouldn't mathematically kill her; surely no legendary Great Youkai would literally cry and violently fuss just because of a simple, automated massage chair.
"My turn, my turn!"
Seeing Leo lazily get up, the four identical Flandres aggressively scrambled to jump onto the empty massage chair. Yukari Yakumo's terrifying, bloody screams absolutely didn't magically scare them at all; instead, they were completely, incredibly even more excited to try it themselves! If the mechanical intensity was really exactly that high and painful, she'd absolutely have to heavily consider exactly how to maliciously lure her arrogant sister over and completely finish her off with it!
Leo happily helped Flandre smoothly start the massage chair. Exactly two tiny Flandres fit perfectly on one massive chair. He safely, smartly chose the exact same gentle intensity he had completely used for himself; who in their right, logical mind would aggressively choose the violent, fascia-knife bone-grinding torture mode?! Right, Yukari Yakumo?
"No! I absolutely can't be the single, only one suffering! I violently want everyone else to feel this exact pain!"
Lying pitifully in Yuyuko's soft arms, Yukari Yakumo rested for a long, painful while before gradually, agonizingly regaining actual nerve feeling in her lower body. Violently gritting her teeth at the two humming massage chairs, an incredibly dangerous, completely toxic idea rose in her ancient mind. A massive, swirling dark Gap suddenly opened in the air, and she aggressively poked her head inside, whispering and talking to someone far away.
After a short while, the massive Gap violently opened wider, and the absolute, terrifying old-timers of Gensokyo stepped heavily out into the living room. They were clearly, visibly interested in the 'magical' massage chair Yukari Yakumo mentioned, especially after seeing the incredibly blissful, drooling expressions on the Flandres lying there; their massive, paranoid guard lowered significantly.
Yukari Yakumo's notorious reputation as a malicious prankster was exactly as famous as her formal title as the Sage of Youkai. If this highly suspicious person happily told you for absolutely no reason that there was something incredibly good to share, you'd absolutely have to aggressively consider if you'd completely offended her somehow in this life and she was trying to kill you.
Leo sat silently to the side without saying a single, warning word. Better them than me. If Yukari Yakumo aggressively wanted to violently court death by tricking these monsters, let her! Besides, these specific people's raw physical constitutions were completely, infinitely better than the lazy Yukari Yakumo's; they probably absolutely wouldn't be so humiliatingly embarrassed by the pain that they'd violently fly into a rage and aggressively send everyone away.
"You guys happily have fun, Ran and I are going directly back to the bedroom to sleep."
Leo immediately stood up and forcefully pulled Ran Yakumo away before rapidly leaving the room. This was his dear, precious wife; he absolutely couldn't biologically let her physically get caught up in this impending, explosive disaster!
In the massive living room, Eirin Yagokoro, Byakuren Hijiri, Kanako Yasaka, Yuuka Kazami, Megumu Iizunamaru, and Yuugi Hoshiguma all stared heavily at the sweating Yukari Yakumo with deep, terrifying interest, wondering exactly what dark scheme she was up to. As for the "incredibly good stuff" and "deeply relaxing the body" she heavily told them—absolutely anyone who blindly believed that was exactly as stupid as Cirno.
"What exactly are you all suspiciously looking at me for? Get on! Little Flandre is entirely done, it's absolutely your turn. This is incredibly good stuff little brother expensively got from entirely another world. We've completely all tried it; exactly who wants to go first? It's really, deeply comfortable."
Yukari Yakumo absolutely had no self-awareness regarding her highly untrustworthy image in the sharp eyes of others, absolutely still enthusiastically, smilingly recommending the death-trap. The more she actively pushed it, the more incredibly guarded absolutely everyone became. Exactly like a hungry weasel giving polite New Year's greetings to a fat chicken—she was definitely, 100% up to no good!
"I'll go absolutely first. I completely want to see exactly what this is all about."
Yuuka Kazami was the brave first to step forward, her aura terrifying. It was literally just a mechanical massage chair; if there was a violent problem, she'd just completely smash the entire expensive machine into plastic dust. In the absolute face of her ultimate, overwhelming raw power, absolutely all petty tricks and mechanical deceptions were completely useless.
"Come, come, simply take your outer clothes off completely before happily lying down. It's absolutely just us girls here, don't be afraid."
Yukari Yakumo limped painfully as she eagerly guided Yuuka Kazami onto the heavy leather chair, violently, aggressively cranking absolutely every single dial and parameter completely to the maximum setting exactly as Ran Yakumo had tragically done before. Although she completely didn't logically understand exactly what the digital panel displayed, she could absolutely still perfectly mimic the physical actions.
The terrifying, familiar metallic locks suddenly violently secured Yuuka Kazami's massive, powerful body. Seeing the completely familiar, terrifying process, an incredibly dark smile of absolute success violently appeared on Yukari Yakumo's face. The massive massage was indeed quite comfortable exactly at first; the brutal, freezing fascia knife absolutely wouldn't mechanically appear for a few agonizing minutes, which was exactly enough time for her to maliciously trick completely another person onto the other empty chair!
"Come, come, Maru, it's your turn. I was completely wrong in the past, and I formally apologize right now. Just give me some face and happily try it. Look exactly how much Yuuka Kazami is peacefully enjoying it."
To maliciously trick entirely another person, Yukari Yakumo violently cast aside absolutely all ancient shame, incredibly affectionately supporting the Tengu Megumu Iizunamaru's hand to smoothly lead her directly to the second massage chair, eagerly helping her take off her heavy kimono and gently guiding her to lie down.
Megumu Iizunamaru absolutely knew Yukari Yakumo was completely up to no good, but exactly since the other party was aggressively acting like this, it would be entirely a bit ungrateful to refuse the peace offering. And... Yuuka Kazami absolutely did seem to be completely, peacefully enjoying it...
Click! CLACK!
The massive metallic locks violently snapped completely shut. Yukari Yakumo could absolutely no longer forcefully suppress the twitching corners of her mouth, revealing an incredibly cruel, victorious smile. At the exact same time, Yuuka Kazami on the other side also completely saw the terrifying, cold mechanical arms violently extending from the base of the massage chair.
"Mmm..."
An incredibly soft, completely uncontrollable moan of absolute, deep physical pleasure suddenly escaped Yuuka Kazami's mouth!
Yukari Yakumo violently whipped her head around in absolute shock, her cruel smile completely, instantly freezing on her face. How on earth could such an incredibly, genuinely comfortable moan possibly come out from that bone-grinding torture?! Could the terrifying Yuuka Kazami actually be... a massive masochist?!
