The first sound Sasuke heard was not a voice.
It was a distant, irregular noise, as if something were marking time inside his own head. A constant, metallic beep—too repetitive to be natural. He tried to ignore it, but the sound seemed to cut through any attempt to return to the void.
Slowly, light came.
Not all at once—first as a pressure behind his eyelids, then as a real, insistent discomfort that forced his eyes to move, even against his will.
Sasuke blinked.
The world was blurred. Too white. There was a strange smell in the air, something between alcohol and herbs, and his entire body felt heavy, as if it were sinking into something invisible.
He tried to move.
Nothing happened.
His muscles responded with delay, a faulty command, and a dull pain spread through his chest, traveling down his arms and legs.
"…"
No words came out.
His throat was dry. His mouth, bitter.
Sasuke blinked again, harder, forcing his eyes to adjust. The ceiling above him was smooth, pale, with no cracks, no familiar shadows. It wasn't the ceiling of his room.
It wasn't home.
The metallic sound continued.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
Slowly, memories began to rearrange themselves.
The street.
The blood.
The open house.
His father's body.
The sword.
Itachi.
The name cut through his mind like a blade.
Sasuke tried to sit up all at once.
Pain hit immediately. A shock ran through his spine, his chest tightened, and he let out a low, involuntary sound—closer to a grunt than a scream.
"Easy."
The voice came from nearby.
It wasn't unfamiliar. It wasn't a doctor's.
Sasuke turned his head with difficulty.
Ren was sitting beside the bed.
He didn't look scared. He didn't look tense. His hands rested on his own legs, posture straight, eyes attentive—the same way as always. As if he were just waiting.
Sasuke stared at him.
For a few seconds, he said nothing. He simply studied his brother's face, trying to fit it into reality.
"You woke up," Ren said quietly. "It's been a few hours since—"
"Shut up."
Sasuke's voice came out hoarse, weak, but firm enough to interrupt.
Ren fell silent immediately.
Sasuke took a deep breath, feeling the pain spread again. The room felt too small. The air too heavy.
"Where are we?" he asked, without looking directly at him.
"Konoha Hospital."
The answer was simple. Direct.
Sasuke closed his eyes for a moment.
Hospital.
So it hadn't been a dream.
It hadn't been an illusion.
His chest tightened.
"How long was I out?"
"Almost two days."
Two days.
The world had kept existing while he was unconscious.
That bothered him more than it should have.
Sasuke opened his eyes again and stared at Ren.
"And them?" he asked.
Ren took a second longer than usual to respond.
"What?"
"Our parents."
Silence settled between them.
Ren didn't look away. He didn't sigh. He didn't change his posture.
"They're dead," he said.
No softening. No hesitation.
The sentence hit Sasuke like a direct blow.
He didn't react immediately.
He didn't scream. He didn't cry. He didn't move.
He just stared at the ceiling, feeling something inside his chest break in a strange way—not like pain, but like emptiness.
"So that's it," he murmured.
Ren remained silent.
Sasuke laughed.
It wasn't a real laugh. It was short, dry, completely without humor.
"He killed everyone. And I passed out."
Ren frowned slightly.
"Sasuke—"
"No," he interrupted again. "Stop."
He slowly turned his head, staring at his brother with dark eyes, now far too cold for someone his age.
"You knew, didn't you?"
Ren blinked.
"Knew what?"
"That they were dead. That the house was empty. That everything was over."
Sasuke's voice began to grow stronger. "And even so, you're sitting here like this. As if nothing happened."
Ren inhaled slowly.
"I'm not pretending nothing happened."
"You are."
Sasuke tried to sit up again, ignoring the pain.
"You always do this. You always stay calm. Always just watching. Like everything's training. Something to analyze."
Ren rose slightly from the chair, instinctively.
"Sasuke, I—"
"You didn't feel anything, did you?"
The words came out harsher than he intended.
Ren froze.
"That's not true."
"Then prove it."
The room felt smaller with every second.
Sasuke was breathing faster now, his chest rising and falling unevenly.
"Prove you felt something when you saw Dad dead. When you saw Mom on the floor. When you saw him holding that sword."
Ren clenched his fingers slightly.
"I did feel it."
"Doesn't look like it."
The silence between them became heavy.
Ren looked at the floor for a brief moment, then back at his brother.
"Feeling doesn't mean reacting the same way."
"So you didn't react."
"I reacted inside."
Sasuke laughed again.
"Of course. Inside. Always inside."
He turned his face toward the wall.
"You're sick."
Ren felt the word hit him as if it were physical.
"Sasuke—"
"No, seriously," he continued, his voice now lower, colder. "Our family died. The clan is gone. And you're just there… intact. Talking normally. Thinking normally. Like this is just another strange day."
Ren took a step forward.
"You want me to scream?"
Sasuke turned back quickly.
"Yes."
The answer came immediately.
"I want you to be angry. I want you to break something. I want you to look human."
Ren fell silent.
For a few seconds, only the monitor filled the room.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
Then Ren spoke.
"I am angry."
Sasuke narrowed his eyes.
"Doesn't look like it."
"Because I don't know how to scream," Ren replied. "But that doesn't mean I'm not broken."
The words came out low. Contained.
Sasuke felt something shift inside his chest, but he couldn't tell what it was.
"You're not broken," he said. "You're functioning."
Ren took a deep breath.
"I'm functioning because if I stop, I don't know if I'll be able to start again."
Sasuke stared at him in silence.
"I saw everything," Ren continued. "I saw the bodies. I saw the blood. I saw you on the ground. I saw him leaving."
His voice faltered, almost imperceptibly.
"And I couldn't fall. Because someone had to stay standing."
Silence returned.
Sasuke felt his throat tighten for a moment.
But the anger was still there. Stronger.
"So you became the strong one," he murmured. "And I became the weak one."
Ren shook his head.
"That's not it."
"It is."
Sasuke clenched his fists.
"You stayed conscious. I passed out. I did nothing. I didn't fight. I didn't see. I couldn't even die with them."
Ren moved closer to the bed.
"Sasuke, you're not weak."
"I am."
The answer came without hesitation.
"He killed everyone. And I couldn't even stand."
Ren opened his mouth to reply, but Sasuke continued.
"I promised I'd get stronger. That I'd protect. That I'd catch up to Itachi."
His voice began to shake.
"And when the time came… I was on the ground."
The room fell into absolute silence.
Ren felt a real tightness in his chest.
"Sasuke… you were eight years old."
"So what?"
"So no one could've done anything."
"You did."
Ren went still.
"I didn't," he said. "I just survived."
Sasuke stared at him.
"Then why does it feel like only I lost everything?"
The question lingered in the air.
Ren took time to answer.
"Because you feel things directly," he said finally. "And I feel in layers."
Sasuke frowned.
"That makes no sense."
"It does to me."
Ren took a deep breath.
"I'm sad. I'm angry. I'm empty. I'm scared."
He pointed to his own chest.
"But all of it happens in silence."
Sasuke looked at him for a long moment.
Then he turned away again.
"I don't want to be like that."
"Like what?"
"Like you."
Ren felt the sentence more than he heard it.
"I don't want to stay calm. I don't want to observe. I don't want to analyze."
Sasuke closed his eyes.
"I want to feel everything. Even if it hurts. Even if it destroys me."
Ren swallowed.
"That will consume you."
"Let it."
The monitor kept marking time.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
Ren sat back down in the chair.
"So what are you going to do?" he asked.
Sasuke opened his eyes slowly.
"I'm going to get stronger."
His voice was completely cold now.
"I'm going to train. I'm going to learn everything. I'm going to kill Itachi."
Ren felt a chill run through him.
"And after that?"
Sasuke didn't answer immediately.
"Then I'll see."
Ren observed his brother.
The rigid posture. The empty gaze. The total absence of tears.
That wasn't strength.
It was shutting down.
"Sasuke… you don't need to erase yourself to keep going."
Sasuke turned his face to the side.
"I already did."
Ren didn't reply.
For a few seconds, they just stayed there—two brothers in the same room, feeling the same loss in completely different ways.
"You can go," Sasuke said at last. "I want to be alone."
Ren hesitated.
"I can stay."
"I don't want you to."
Ren stood up slowly.
Before leaving, he said quietly:
"You don't have to carry this alone."
Sasuke didn't respond.
The door closed with a soft sound.
Sasuke stared at the ceiling again.
The emptiness inside his chest felt bigger now. More organized. Colder.
He didn't cry.
He didn't scream.
He didn't break anything.
He simply let something inside him die in silence.
And in its place, something else was born.
Not hope.
Not acceptance.
Just a promise.
I will kill Itachi.
(Early access chapters: see the bio.)