"Pfft!"
Before Nick Fury could even finish his joke, Lex spat out his cola.
After coughing, he stared at Nick in complete disbelief before turning to Natasha and Hawkeye.
"What kind of joke is that? Your S.H.I.E.L.D. director actually says things like this?"
When he finished, Lex looked back at Nick, clearly expecting an explanation.
Nick simply shrugged.
"What choice do I have? When someone far beyond your reach shows up, you either become their enemy or learn to laugh along. Sometimes adapting is the smartest option."
He gestured around the table.
"Look at all of you. Lex, you've learned to work alongside Clark. Bruce, you've accepted teamwork. Clark, you've chosen to stand beside someone as dangerous as Axel."
He smiled.
"The changes you've made are far greater than mine. You changed your entire worldview."
"As for me, I just tell dark jokes. Besides, I'm Black, so at least nobody's going to accuse me of making racist jokes."
Nick flashed a mischievous grin.
Axel slapped the table.
"Nick."
His voice was enough to silence the room.
"I'll overlook the provocation because your joke was actually funny. Don't make a habit of it."
With a casual wave of his hand, Nick's bionic eye suddenly tore itself free from its socket in a shower of sparks and blood.
"Argh!"
Nick cried out before hurriedly raising both hands.
"Easy, Axel."
He forced a painful smile.
"You know no amount of manipulation from me could ever threaten you."
He chuckled weakly.
"I'm just a mouse trying to scavenge scraps from a dragon's meal. At worst, I accidentally chew on one of the dragon's scales."
"No matter how hard a mouse bites, it'll never damage a dragon."
"So... maybe let this harmless little mouse go?"
Axel looked at him for a moment before slapping his outstretched hand.
The bionic eye immediately returned to its place.
Satisfied, Axel picked up another burger and took a large bite.
Tony's restaurant recommendations had always been questionable, but everyone agreed he knew good burgers.
Even Steve Rogers looked tempted and quickly ordered enough food for himself and the others.
While the kitchen hurried to prepare everything, Nick quietly grabbed another chicken drumstick.
After taking a bite, he looked toward Axel.
"By the way, would you mind telling us why you're here?"
"This isn't an interrogation."
He shook his head.
"You've helped New York tremendously. Consider this my way of returning the favor. If there's anything we can assist with, we're willing to help."
Lex chuckled before Axel could answer.
"That sounds generous."
He nudged Axel with his elbow.
"But what you really want is to figure out our objectives before deciding how much support you'll give."
Axel shrugged.
"Just tell him."
Lex smiled.
"Very well."
He looked directly at Nick.
"We're extremely interested in your universe."
"Our goal is a complete integration."
"The four of us are simply the advance party. Before anything larger begins, we need to..."
He hadn't finished speaking before Natasha and Clint instinctively tensed.
Natasha, who was still sitting comfortably on Axel's lap, stiffened noticeably.
Even Steve abandoned the food counter and hurried back.
Seeing everyone's reactions, Bruce sighed and punched Lex lightly in the shoulder.
"Enough."
He shook his head.
"Don't joke about things like that."
"They're genuinely nervous."
He turned toward Nick with an apologetic smile.
"We're here as partners, not conquerors."
"Even if intimidating you wouldn't be difficult."
Nick swallowed.
Bruce continued.
"You're S.H.I.E.L.D."
"I know what that means."
"You've faced countless global crises with courage."
"But whenever the world isn't under attack, S.H.I.E.L.D. somehow becomes the source of the next disaster."
He looked Nick directly in the eye.
"Where S.H.I.E.L.D. exists, Hydra exists."
"Consider that my gift of goodwill."
Silence filled the restaurant.
Steve's expression changed instantly.
"Hydra?"
He looked toward Nick.
"Is that true?"
Nick frowned.
"I don't know."
"But I believe he believes it."
He nodded toward Bruce.
"If he's right, then we have serious problems."
Looking back at Bruce, Nick gave a small nod.
"Thank you for the warning."
"In return, let me offer some information of my own."
He smiled faintly.
"No matter how flawed S.H.I.E.L.D. may be, I'd still rather trust it than Batman."
Bruce remained expressionless.
Nick continued.
"We're a massive organization."
"Some corruption is almost inevitable."
"But you're only one man."
"And somehow you've still managed to create world-ending crises across multiple realities."
"You've built contingency plans against everyone."
"You've destroyed entire worlds."
"So perhaps you're not in much of a position to lecture us."
Bruce accepted the criticism without argument.
"Perhaps you're right."
He nodded.
"Then thank you for the information."
"Unlike S.H.I.E.L.D., I'm only one person."
"I can still choose to become better."
He leaned slightly forward.
"If I were you, I'd dissolve S.H.I.E.L.D. entirely and rebuild it with people I truly trusted."
"To be honest, outside the agents sitting here, I'm not sure you could find twenty loyal employees left."
He folded his arms.
"That advice is free."
"You're welcome."
Nick's expression finally became serious.
After several moments, he sighed.
"Is it really that bad?"
He looked at Bruce.
"Maybe we really will need your help."
"We're happy to help."
Lex answered before Bruce could speak.
"One of our objectives is to use Axel's strength to bring hope to humanity across countless universes."
He smiled.
"Come to think of it, we've never properly introduced ourselves."
"As you've probably realized, people who were once destined to oppose one another now stand together because of Axel."
He spread his arms proudly.
"We are the Pan-Universal Human Federation."
"A loose alliance spanning countless universes with humanity's survival and prosperity as its highest priority."
"Our structure is decentralized, but our strength is not."
"Axel isn't under our command, nor could anyone command him."
"But even without relying on him, underestimate us at your own risk."
Nick slowly nodded.
"I believe you."
"Still, cooperation requires trust."
"And trust requires safeguards."
"If we're going to work together, we need to establish clear terms."
As he spoke, he wiped the sweat from his forehead.
An interdimensional organization that included Batman was enough to make anyone nervous.
Bruce noticed the concern immediately.
He looked toward Axel.
"When we're finished here... let's buy some comics."
"I originally had no interest in reading them."
"But now I'm starting to think some alternate versions of us may be more dangerous than we imagined."
Tony snorted.
"You're finally catching on."
He bit into another burger.
"Lex has nearly destroyed or reshaped the world multiple times, usually because of Superman."
He pointed at Clark.
"And you."
"You've wiped out millions in more than one timeline."
"In one reality you even hurled Atlantis into the Sun."
Clark froze.
"I... did what?"
Bruce immediately placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
"Don't dwell on it."
"They're alternate realities."
"There are countless versions of every one of us."
He glanced toward Tony.
"There are versions of Tony who became tyrants too."
"Stories exist to explore possibilities."
"Our choices are what define us."
"The only Superman that matters is the one sitting here."
Clark slowly relaxed.
Lex smirked.
"Exactly."
"There are endless versions of everyone."
"Dreams alone create countless possibilities."
"Those people aren't us."
"We're responsible only for our own choices."
He looked back at Nick.
"But your problems already exist in your own world."
"So let's solve them."
Taking another drink of cola, Lex leaned forward confidently.
"Open your technological databases to us."
"After reviewing them, we'll determine what technologies we're willing to share in return."
"The Human Federation isn't especially interested in your conflict with Hydra."
"But because extraterrestrial forces are involved, we'll help."
"You provide information."
"We provide technology."
"A fair exchange."
"Defending humanity from alien threats benefits everyone."
Nick remained silent for a long moment.
Finally he answered.
"That won't happen."
"At least not completely."
"You wouldn't reveal everything to us either."
He looked around the table.
"When you appeared in our universe, do you know what frightened me most?"
"What guarantees do I have that Kryptonian armies, Darkseid's forces, or some alternate Batman won't use your methods to invade our world?"
Lex nodded.
"And what guarantees do we have that Thanos, Ultron, or any of your universe's threats won't follow the same path into ours?"
"We all have dangers to face."
"That's exactly why cooperation matters."
"Yes, Axel is unbelievably powerful."
"We're fortunate to have him."
"But someone like Axel should be respected, not treated as a solution to every problem."
"We need to stand on our own."
He smiled.
"And that's why I'm considering inviting your world into the Federation."
His words left Nick completely silent.
Before anyone else could speak, Clark suddenly turned toward the restaurant wall.
His expression changed instantly.
"Damn it!"
Everyone became alert.
The next second, streaks of smoke tore across the sky.
A barrage of missiles descended directly toward the Burger King.
===
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