When Jeong Taeui looked at Ilay with wide eyes but then quickly averted his gaze, Ilay
continued speaking slowly.
"It's not just limited to animals. Since he was young, Christoph has had psychological issues
—literally. He is completely insensitive to pain....Whether it's someone else's pain or his
own.... At least now he knows how to protect himself, but back then he didn't. He would hurt
others and himself for no reason."
Just like stepping on an ant and killing a fly.
"In fact, there were kids even more obsessed with Christoph than I was."
"That ... is quite serious."
Jeong Taeui mumbled foolishly.
Ilay paused for a moment. His hand slowly tapped on the blanket on the bed.
"The problem is that Christoph is numb to his own pain. Emotionally, he has no basic defense
mechanism."
Ilay said from beside him. Jeong Taeui bowed his head and looked at his toes.
Unable to feel pain.
He couldn't understand what that would feel like. Although he thought he knew, he really
couldn't imagine it. Because Jeong Taeui wasn't like that.
But suddenly, he had a thought.
If someone continuously suffered painful injuries without feeling them and just left them
without any defense, they would eventually die.
Whether it's the body or the mind.
They wouldn't even know they were about to die. How strange.
"That kid has a dual mind. On one hand, he can feel and accept certain things like others, but
in other aspects, he can't feel anything at all. But the 'other' person he is most similar to is his
mother. A mother who constantly feels terrible and fearful of her own child."
Ilay emphasized the last words as if he didn't want to say more. Jeong Taeui glanced at Ilay
but then turned away again.
He kept looking down at his feet, watching his toes wiggle, then looked up at the ceiling and
sighed."That story.... I really don't want to hear it."
Jeong Taeui's voice sounded drained.
Christoph today might still be the same as when he was young. He was cruel. He was cruel
for no reason, and no matter how cruel he was, he didn't remember it.
Just like the man sitting next to him.
But Christoph and Ilay were still different.
Different in what way?
".... Really...."
Jeong Taeui grumbled - "Ah, I really don't want to hear it anymore." - and reluctantly tousled
his hair.
Seeing him like that, Ilay suddenly smiled. - "Well then, Taeui."
Jeong Taeui looked at the fleeting smile on his lips with suspicion. Ilay lowered his voice a
bit, like whispering in his ear.
"Why am I telling you this?"
".... Because I'm the only person in the world closely tied to a madman." – Jeong Taeui
replied gloomily. Hearing that, Ilay raised an eyebrow slightly. The smile on his lips was faint
but the smile in his squinting eyes clearly suggested it was an excellent answer.
Jeong Taeui looked at him for a long time, at that person who always showed a relaxed and
comfortable exterior but was cold inside, then quietly sighed.
"Really, just being near one madman is already too much for me.... If this keeps up, I might
get shot for real one day."
Jeong Taeui could only keep those thoughts to himself.
And before that happened, he needed to humanize that madman quickly, but the more he
tried, the further the path seemed.
Ilay Riegrow was still an extremely difficult person to grasp.
Only one thing could be predicted.
That he would always act unpredictably.
He often discarded things he liked or had liked for a long time without hesitation.
Witnessing such things—though emotionally, Jeong Taeui vaguely felt it wouldn't happen to
him—but he wouldn't be surprised if someday Ilay pointed a gun at him.Yeah, see, today he got shot by him. He said it was an accident, but before that, he considered
it a joke and aimed the gun at him.
Jeong Taeui suddenly felt a twinge in his side.
"... Me?"
At the same time, a quiet voice sounded beside him.
That voice no longer held any emotion. Completely different from before.
Jeong Taeui looked at Ilay. He was still looking at Jeong Taeui with a blank face. A voice
slipped out from his lips as if he were speaking to himself.
"Alright... that's right. Maybe. It could be like that."
Only after a few seconds did he realize that his murmur now was a response to what he had
mumbled earlier.
Jeong Taeui clicked his tongue.
He knew he usually did this, but he didn't expect his condition had worsened to the point
where he unconsciously spoke his thoughts out loud for others to hear.
He thought he really should open an academy to teach normal things to these people. And the
most basic lesson would start with what one can and cannot say.
Jeong Taeui bitterly licked his lips.
"Well, let's just leave future things to the future. Anyway, for now, I need to keep myself alive
and live well."
Who knows what the future holds, even if someday he finds someone he loves, one thing is
certain: he won't have to worry about that at the present time. So just enjoy the moment. If it
happens, that's fine too. Without a madman around, he could go anywhere he wanted, return
to his familiar homeland....
... But when that happens, he feels there will be some small regrets.
Jeong Taeui stared blankly at Ilay.
His black eyes were only a few handspans away, quietly watching Jeong Taeui with one hand
supporting his temple, lost in thought.
Every time he saw Ilay like this, he had a thought.
The eyes of this man were sometimes chillingly cold.
When he was thinking or sometimes talking on the phone about work, his cold, icy black
eyes often squinted dangerously.Only when Jeong Taeui looked into Ilay's eyes did he realize that his black eyes were icy in
nature*.
(*寒色 : The author uses the Chinese term 寒色 , meaning cold color, to express a sense of
coldness, darkness, or mystery.)
But so what?
He had known that from the beginning.
He understood clearly that this man had personality issues, even if his psychological state
was different from that of a criminal. And knowing all that, Jeong Taeui still stayed with him.
Simply because that man was Ilay Riegrow.
"Just sitting still, why do you still look so good...?" - Jeong Taeui suddenly mumbled.
Right in front of him, Ilay was quietly watching him—or somewhere else. His lips looked
unusually prominent today and kept catching his eye.
"...."
Jeong Taeui suddenly impulsively leaned forward. And then he placed his lips on those silent
ones.
Their closed lips overlapped.
Jeong Taeui felt his body heat on his lips.
'Warm'
He found it strange that this warmth was also flowing to the other person.
Thinking back, he realized he had kissed this man many times. But it seemed there weren't
that many gentle kisses like this.
And when he savored it slowly like this, it was quite good. He liked the dry yet soft and
warm feeling.
"....It's alright."
Jeong Taeui kept his lips like that for about ten seconds, then pulled back and sat straight on
the chair as before.
Ilay's face was still in front of him.
However, the expression on that face had changed slightly compared to earlier. It was no
longer the cold gaze piercing him.
Ilay was looking down at Jeong Taeui, frowning slightly in a strange way. His hand, resting
on his temple, didn't move."... Ah... that's really strange. I really like it, but it makes one feel strange."
Jeong Taeui scratched his head in a daze. Ilay, who had been watching Jeong Taeui with a
look like he was observing a strange creature, finally spoke slowly.
"Rather than strange, I'd say it feels uncomfortable."
"Uncomfortable... isn't 'uncomfortable' usually accompanied by words like 'annoying' or
'weird'?"
When Jeong Taeui seriously asked, Ilay suddenly smirked.
"Maybe the meaning of 'uncomfortable' you know and the 'uncomfortable' I know aren't
different, but when you say it like that, it seems quite different."
The moment he finished speaking those words.
Ilay reached out. His large, white hand brushed past Jeong Taeui's earlobe and generously
wrapped around his nape. He pulled him closer.
Once again, lips met lips. But this time was entirely different from before.
... Ah... This man was right.
The feeling he unconsciously recognized.
The tongue tangling with his lips seemed to want to penetrate deep into his body. He felt as if
those lips would soon devour him. Or he might suffocate and die before that.
This was exactly what happened when he locked lips with this man. Even if it started with a
gentle touch, the ending always left Jeong Taeui struggling with the feeling that if he didn't
wake up, he would be devoured.
Even now.
Ilay used those big hands, one cupping his cheek and the other around the back of Jeong
Taeui's head, pressing his lips against his as if trying to swallow him. Now, he no longer
looked human; he seemed like a giant wild beast or something entirely different, holding him
and devouring him. This wasn't a cute way to kiss someone.
Sometimes Jeong Taeui feared this man... He felt like he would really be eaten by him.
Even as he felt himself about to faint from lack of oxygen, Jeong Taeui mustered enough
strength to think about this. Then, after a moment, he tried to push Ilay away, thinking he
would pass out from suffocation if this continued. However, the solid figure remained
unmoved, not budging an inch. It seemed like Ilay wouldn't easily let go.
"Wait a minute… ."Jeong Taeui was almost out of breath; he tried to turn his head to say something, but once
again, his breath was taken away as Ilay's lips quickly followed, sealing his own.
Wait, this situation had some issues.
If this continued, Jeong Taeui felt he would definitely pass out from suffocation, and even if
he didn't, he didn't think this would end if it kept going. More importantly, this wasn't his
room; Jeong Taeui didn't know when the owner of this room would return.
"Wait a minute, wait... !"
Jeong Taeui tried to turn his head away and shouted again, but the man entwining him
seemed uninterested in listening. No, more accurately, he smiled lightly, enjoying Jeong
Taeui's confusion. That smile quickly filled Jeong Taeui's mouth.
Jeong Taeui suddenly felt that if he made another sound, this man would really bite him. With
that thought, he kept silent.
He decided to wait a bit longer before starting to scream and struggle.
Jeong Taeui liked this feeling.
Sometimes, when Ilay kissed him, he discovered something small, interesting, and new. He
liked that feeling. The sensation when he heard Ilay's laughter when something happened.
When Ilay laughed like that, their lips and tongues touched, and Jeong Taeui's mouth felt
ticklish. A deep, gentle laugh seemed to transmit directly from his mouth to his ears.
Jeong Taeui liked the feeling of 'tasting' his laughter.
So he decided to stay silent for a while. Even when Ilay's hands began to move improperly
around his waist, sliding down lower, making him feel increasingly dangerous.
Just wait a little longer. Just a bit more.
But because of this distraction, it seemed Jeong Taeui missed something important.
Even though the room was well soundproofed, if you listened carefully, like when reading in
the room, you could hear footsteps from the hallway. And Jeong Taeui missed those
footsteps.
So the door suddenly opened, not because the person was trying to enter quietly or sneakily,
but just an unexpected situation without any prior warning.
"I used this method before, and the bruises healed quickly. If it's a bruise, it will heal on its
own, but still...."
The door suddenly opened with a cheerful sound.At that moment, Jeong Taeui suddenly snapped back as if he had returned from another
world. He opened his half-closed eyes.
Behind Ilay, who was occupying more than half of his vision, he saw Christoph standing in
front of him, holding the doorknob.
He had just stepped in, one hand still holding something that looked like a medicine bottle,
standing there staring at the two of them for a moment.
"...."
***********************
territory-marking move from Ilay; he really is cunning.>
When Jeong Taeui looked at Ilay with wide eyes but then quickly averted his gaze, Ilay
continued speaking slowly.
"It's not just limited to animals. Since he was young, Christoph has had psychological issues
—literally. He is completely insensitive to pain....Whether it's someone else's pain or his
own.... At least now he knows how to protect himself, but back then he didn't. He would hurt
others and himself for no reason."
Just like stepping on an ant and killing a fly.
"In fact, there were kids even more obsessed with Christoph than I was."
"That ... is quite serious."
Jeong Taeui mumbled foolishly.
Ilay paused for a moment. His hand slowly tapped on the blanket on the bed.
"The problem is that Christoph is numb to his own pain. Emotionally, he has no basic defense
mechanism."
Ilay said from beside him. Jeong Taeui bowed his head and looked at his toes.
Unable to feel pain.
He couldn't understand what that would feel like. Although he thought he knew, he really
couldn't imagine it. Because Jeong Taeui wasn't like that.
But suddenly, he had a thought.
If someone continuously suffered painful injuries without feeling them and just left them
without any defense, they would eventually die.
Whether it's the body or the mind.
They wouldn't even know they were about to die. How strange.
"That kid has a dual mind. On one hand, he can feel and accept certain things like others, but
in other aspects, he can't feel anything at all. But the 'other' person he is most similar to is his
mother. A mother who constantly feels terrible and fearful of her own child."
Ilay emphasized the last words as if he didn't want to say more. Jeong Taeui glanced at Ilay
but then turned away again.
He kept looking down at his feet, watching his toes wiggle, then looked up at the ceiling and
sighed."That story.... I really don't want to hear it."
Jeong Taeui's voice sounded drained.
Christoph today might still be the same as when he was young. He was cruel. He was cruel
for no reason, and no matter how cruel he was, he didn't remember it.
Just like the man sitting next to him.
But Christoph and Ilay were still different.
Different in what way?
".... Really...."
Jeong Taeui grumbled - "Ah, I really don't want to hear it anymore." - and reluctantly tousled
his hair.
Seeing him like that, Ilay suddenly smiled. - "Well then, Taeui."
Jeong Taeui looked at the fleeting smile on his lips with suspicion. Ilay lowered his voice a
bit, like whispering in his ear.
"Why am I telling you this?"
".... Because I'm the only person in the world closely tied to a madman." – Jeong Taeui
replied gloomily. Hearing that, Ilay raised an eyebrow slightly. The smile on his lips was faint
but the smile in his squinting eyes clearly suggested it was an excellent answer.
Jeong Taeui looked at him for a long time, at that person who always showed a relaxed and
comfortable exterior but was cold inside, then quietly sighed.
"Really, just being near one madman is already too much for me.... If this keeps up, I might
get shot for real one day."
Jeong Taeui could only keep those thoughts to himself.
And before that happened, he needed to humanize that madman quickly, but the more he
tried, the further the path seemed.
Ilay Riegrow was still an extremely difficult person to grasp.
Only one thing could be predicted.
That he would always act unpredictably.
He often discarded things he liked or had liked for a long time without hesitation.
Witnessing such things—though emotionally, Jeong Taeui vaguely felt it wouldn't happen to
him—but he wouldn't be surprised if someday Ilay pointed a gun at him.Yeah, see, today he got shot by him. He said it was an accident, but before that, he considered
it a joke and aimed the gun at him.
Jeong Taeui suddenly felt a twinge in his side.
"... Me?"
At the same time, a quiet voice sounded beside him.
That voice no longer held any emotion. Completely different from before.
Jeong Taeui looked at Ilay. He was still looking at Jeong Taeui with a blank face. A voice
slipped out from his lips as if he were speaking to himself.
"Alright... that's right. Maybe. It could be like that."
Only after a few seconds did he realize that his murmur now was a response to what he had
mumbled earlier.
Jeong Taeui clicked his tongue.
He knew he usually did this, but he didn't expect his condition had worsened to the point
where he unconsciously spoke his thoughts out loud for others to hear.
He thought he really should open an academy to teach normal things to these people. And the
most basic lesson would start with what one can and cannot say.
Jeong Taeui bitterly licked his lips.
"Well, let's just leave future things to the future. Anyway, for now, I need to keep myself alive
and live well."
Who knows what the future holds, even if someday he finds someone he loves, one thing is
certain: he won't have to worry about that at the present time. So just enjoy the moment. If it
happens, that's fine too. Without a madman around, he could go anywhere he wanted, return
to his familiar homeland....
... But when that happens, he feels there will be some small regrets.
Jeong Taeui stared blankly at Ilay.
His black eyes were only a few handspans away, quietly watching Jeong Taeui with one hand
supporting his temple, lost in thought.
Every time he saw Ilay like this, he had a thought.
The eyes of this man were sometimes chillingly cold.
When he was thinking or sometimes talking on the phone about work, his cold, icy black
eyes often squinted dangerously.Only when Jeong Taeui looked into Ilay's eyes did he realize that his black eyes were icy in
nature*.
(*寒色 : The author uses the Chinese term 寒色 , meaning cold color, to express a sense of
coldness, darkness, or mystery.)
But so what?
He had known that from the beginning.
He understood clearly that this man had personality issues, even if his psychological state
was different from that of a criminal. And knowing all that, Jeong Taeui still stayed with him.
Simply because that man was Ilay Riegrow.
"Just sitting still, why do you still look so good...?" - Jeong Taeui suddenly mumbled.
Right in front of him, Ilay was quietly watching him—or somewhere else. His lips looked
unusually prominent today and kept catching his eye.
"...."
Jeong Taeui suddenly impulsively leaned forward. And then he placed his lips on those silent
ones.
Their closed lips overlapped.
Jeong Taeui felt his body heat on his lips.
'Warm'
He found it strange that this warmth was also flowing to the other person.
Thinking back, he realized he had kissed this man many times. But it seemed there weren't
that many gentle kisses like this.
And when he savored it slowly like this, it was quite good. He liked the dry yet soft and
warm feeling.
"....It's alright."
Jeong Taeui kept his lips like that for about ten seconds, then pulled back and sat straight on
the chair as before.
Ilay's face was still in front of him.
However, the expression on that face had changed slightly compared to earlier. It was no
longer the cold gaze piercing him.
Ilay was looking down at Jeong Taeui, frowning slightly in a strange way. His hand, resting
on his temple, didn't move."... Ah... that's really strange. I really like it, but it makes one feel strange."
Jeong Taeui scratched his head in a daze. Ilay, who had been watching Jeong Taeui with a
look like he was observing a strange creature, finally spoke slowly.
"Rather than strange, I'd say it feels uncomfortable."
"Uncomfortable... isn't 'uncomfortable' usually accompanied by words like 'annoying' or
'weird'?"
When Jeong Taeui seriously asked, Ilay suddenly smirked.
"Maybe the meaning of 'uncomfortable' you know and the 'uncomfortable' I know aren't
different, but when you say it like that, it seems quite different."
The moment he finished speaking those words.
Ilay reached out. His large, white hand brushed past Jeong Taeui's earlobe and generously
wrapped around his nape. He pulled him closer.
Once again, lips met lips. But this time was entirely different from before.
... Ah... This man was right.
The feeling he unconsciously recognized.
The tongue tangling with his lips seemed to want to penetrate deep into his body. He felt as if
those lips would soon devour him. Or he might suffocate and die before that.
This was exactly what happened when he locked lips with this man. Even if it started with a
gentle touch, the ending always left Jeong Taeui struggling with the feeling that if he didn't
wake up, he would be devoured.
Even now.
Ilay used those big hands, one cupping his cheek and the other around the back of Jeong
Taeui's head, pressing his lips against his as if trying to swallow him. Now, he no longer
looked human; he seemed like a giant wild beast or something entirely different, holding him
and devouring him. This wasn't a cute way to kiss someone.
Sometimes Jeong Taeui feared this man... He felt like he would really be eaten by him.
Even as he felt himself about to faint from lack of oxygen, Jeong Taeui mustered enough
strength to think about this. Then, after a moment, he tried to push Ilay away, thinking he
would pass out from suffocation if this continued. However, the solid figure remained
unmoved, not budging an inch. It seemed like Ilay wouldn't easily let go.
"Wait a minute… ."Jeong Taeui was almost out of breath; he tried to turn his head to say something, but once
again, his breath was taken away as Ilay's lips quickly followed, sealing his own.
Wait, this situation had some issues.
If this continued, Jeong Taeui felt he would definitely pass out from suffocation, and even if
he didn't, he didn't think this would end if it kept going. More importantly, this wasn't his
room; Jeong Taeui didn't know when the owner of this room would return.
"Wait a minute, wait... !"
Jeong Taeui tried to turn his head away and shouted again, but the man entwining him
seemed uninterested in listening. No, more accurately, he smiled lightly, enjoying Jeong
Taeui's confusion. That smile quickly filled Jeong Taeui's mouth.
Jeong Taeui suddenly felt that if he made another sound, this man would really bite him. With
that thought, he kept silent.
He decided to wait a bit longer before starting to scream and struggle.
Jeong Taeui liked this feeling.
Sometimes, when Ilay kissed him, he discovered something small, interesting, and new. He
liked that feeling. The sensation when he heard Ilay's laughter when something happened.
When Ilay laughed like that, their lips and tongues touched, and Jeong Taeui's mouth felt
ticklish. A deep, gentle laugh seemed to transmit directly from his mouth to his ears.
Jeong Taeui liked the feeling of 'tasting' his laughter.
So he decided to stay silent for a while. Even when Ilay's hands began to move improperly
around his waist, sliding down lower, making him feel increasingly dangerous.
Just wait a little longer. Just a bit more.
But because of this distraction, it seemed Jeong Taeui missed something important.
Even though the room was well soundproofed, if you listened carefully, like when reading in
the room, you could hear footsteps from the hallway. And Jeong Taeui missed those
footsteps.
So the door suddenly opened, not because the person was trying to enter quietly or sneakily,
but just an unexpected situation without any prior warning.
"I used this method before, and the bruises healed quickly. If it's a bruise, it will heal on its
own, but still...."
The door suddenly opened with a cheerful sound.At that moment, Jeong Taeui suddenly snapped back as if he had returned from another
world. He opened his half-closed eyes.
Behind Ilay, who was occupying more than half of his vision, he saw Christoph standing in
front of him, holding the doorknob.
He had just stepped in, one hand still holding something that looked like a medicine bottle,
standing there staring at the two of them for a moment.
"...."
***********************
territory-marking move from Ilay; he really is cunning.>