DetailI AM EXTRA IN A SHONEN MANGAby THE_V1S1ONNovelFantasyGolden Tickets--Views158.6KPower Stones--#ACTION#ADVENTURE#ROMANCE#REINCARNATION#MAGIC#COMEDY#MYSTERY#SURVIVAL#TRAGEDYKhael Corzedar always felt different but waking up in another world as a side character in his favorite manga turn to anime wasn't what he expected. Once known as Shigeo Smith, a half-Japanese, half-American high school student and passionate anime fan, he's now reborn as a minor background character in the world of Kaen Eclipse, the manga he loved growing up. He remembers every chapter, every fight, every tragic twist. The world of Elysera runs on Shinrei, a spiritual energy powered by emotion. It is a realm where only those who open their Vein Gates can become Veinwalkers, warriors whose hearts fuel their power. The story's hero, Kaen Suro, is a cursed orphan with uncontrollable shade Affinity. In the manga, Kaen trains at a brutal Veinwalker academy, builds powerful friendships, and eventually rises to fight the monstrous Voidborn emotion-corrupted beings of destruction. Shigeo now Khael knows how the story ends. But in this world, he's just an extra. One of many. A background name. A side character fated to die off-screen. Or so the story was. Armed with the knowledge of the original plot and the unpredictable nature of emotions, Khael Corzedar decides to forge his own path; to live, protect, and maybe even change the fate of Kaen Suro himself. Can an extra rewrite the story of a chosen one? Or will he vanish like a shadow in the background, as fate demands?
More
288 Chapters UpdatedLatest update 20d agoReviews3MoreMiyaball6 months agoI do not want to be mean. I think story has potential but writing is okay and weird.
Why is it so long why it feel like I am reading a wiki article sometime. I do not understand.
I think the concept is very good but maybe you can try again and fix errors. I will still give 5 star but author please be better.
Melon.
22THE_V1S1ON6 months agoShameless Author's Rating 💯
Hey guys! Honestly, out of everything I've written so far, this is the novel I'm most proud of. It's the one I truly love creating. My inspiration comes from a mix of iconic anime series like Naruto, Bleach, One Piece, Demon Slayer, Dragon Ball, Jujutsu Kaisen, and many more. But if I had to name my biggest influence, it's definitely Naruto. It's been my favorite since day one, and a huge part of my storytelling style and character development comes from the lessons and emotions I've felt watching it.
That said, I'm still learning and improving, so I'd really appreciate it if you could rate my novel so far. Let me know what you liked, and more importantly, what my flaws are, whether in the plot, pacing, character arcs, or writing style. Your feedback matters a lot to me, and I'm open to changing and growing as a writer. 🙏
Thanks in advance for the support and for reading my work! 💛
4bennet_Kelly3 months agoWow, I just finished reading your story and I'm seriously impressed. The pacing and tone have such visual strength, I could instantly see it as a comic sequence in my head.
I work on commission-based comic art, and your writing really sparked a lot of creative thoughts. No pressure at all, I just wanted to say it really inspired me.
If you ever want to explore that side of it, I'm on Discord (bennett_lol) or Instagram (@eve_verse_).
Rate this bookChapter 1Prologue – I'm Inside the Manga?! The sky looked drawn.
That was the first thing Khael Corzedar thought as he stared upward, eyes squinting at a blue so perfect it couldn't possibly be real. Not like this. Not with clouds shaped like brushstrokes, drifting lazily across a sky colored like an anime background—soft gradients, no pixelation, no smog, no sunspots. Just… surreal beauty.
He was lying in a field of knee-high grass. A breeze tickled his arms.
No buildings. No phones. No sky noise. Just silence.
"What… where…"
He pushed himself up on trembling elbows, only to suddenly—
WHACK!
"AGHH—!!"
A fist struck him in the face, snapping his head to the side. He tumbled backward into the grass with a yelp.
"Gotcha!" a boy's voice said, followed by laughter.
Khael groaned. "What the hell—?!"
From the corner of his now-watering eye, he saw two figures just ahead.
One was a boy with spiky black hair, laughing mischievously as he rubbed his knuckles. The other a girl, scowling with crossed arms. Her silver-white hair shimmered in the light, the soft pink in her braid catching the sun like rose silk.
She was beautiful. Unreal. Like a watercolor dream.
Silver-white hair… lavender eyes… Echo runes glowing faintly on her hands…
Lira Valenne.
Her name burst into his brain like a memory he didn't know he had.
"That wasn't funny, Kaen!" she said, cheeks puffed in frustration.
Kaen.
Khael froze. His heart skipped a beat.
Kaen… Kaen Suro…
All Affinity. Shade Echo Mark. The cursed protagonist of Kaen Eclipse.
"No way… No freaking way…"
Khael clutched his forehead. Flashes poured into his mind like a torrent: volumes stacked on his shelf, late-night rereads, theorizing plot twists online—
He stared at the spiky-haired boy again. The same red-orange ember tips. The same reckless grin.
"This is Kaen Eclipse," he muttered. "I'm inside the manga world."
He stumbled back a few steps, heart pounding.
This isn't the first chapter… It's not Chapter 1 yet…
Wait. Chapter 1 started on the 21st day of Academy Arrival. They said it clearly in the panel.
He looked around. Trees in bloom. Training grounds in the far distance. Students lounging in uniforms.
That means… today is the 19th day.
I'm here… a day before the story begins.
And yet, he wasn't some random NPC. He had a body. A name. Memories… hazy, but present.
The name Khael Corzedar echoed in his ears like it belonged to him and it did.
He could remember walking halls in this academy, awkward conversations, failing to manifest an Affinity… It was fuzzy, like someone else's dream stitched into his mind.
But it was his now.
He wasn't just Shigeo Smith anymore. That boy, who once lay in bed reading this very manga, had died.
And now he was Khael.
He'd grown up reading Kaen Eclipse, a shonen masterpiece about a cursed boy rising from nothing. He'd reread it. Lived in its pages. He even cried when it ended. So many characters died. So many twists. Kaen Suro, the protagonist, had gone from outcast to hero to legend.
But the world was cruel. It always had been.
And now… he was here. Somehow.
Chapter 2Chapter 1 – Extra Observe After that day…
"(Anyway, Today's the 20th day. Chapter 1 of the manga started on the 21st)."
"(They use a different calendar here—one based on emotions. Ten months, thirty-six days each. Right now, it's the 20th day of Umbraen.)"
"(That's the Shade month. The one linked to fear… and Voidborn activity.)"
The academy was already alive with the hum of training Echo fields, Shinrei pulses dancing in the air like glimmers of heat. Yet I couldn't focus on the echoes or the drills. Not when he was standing right there.
Kaen Suro.
He stood in the middle of the courtyard, arms crossed, jaw clenched, eyes narrowed at the training dummy in front of him. Behind him, students gave him wide berth—just like in the manga.
To them, Kaen was the cursed outcast.
To me… he was the main character.
"Kaen… The loser. The loner. The one marked by Voidrot."
He couldn't even use his Echo properly in the early chapters. I remember reading it, back when I was still Shigeo Smith, lying under my blanket with a flashlight like a weeb detective.
Back then, he was known as "The Silent Flame."
A joke of a nickname. He couldn't even summon fire.
But… I knew the truth.
"Chapter 1 of the manga. The day Kaen's seal cracked—by accident. When he used Shade Shinrei for the first time."
That day came after his mentor nearly died. Emotionally triggered, Kaen's Vein Gates burst open, unleashing a surge of unstable Shade energy. Everyone thought it was a fluke.
It wasn't.
He was never just a Flame-type user.
He was everything.
Every Affinity… was his.
But the Shade was blocking them.
No the seal was.
…
💀 Lore Log – The Forbidden Seal
A mental note written in Khael's mind.
"(Kaen's Forbidden Seal channels Shinrei through a corrupted flow.
It enhances power massively but it poisons stability.
Worse, it sends out signals… to Voidborn.)"
"(The Seal is Voidrot's beacon. It was created during the Eclipse Rite an ancient ritual performed by the Suro Clan.)"
"(They wanted to forge the ultimate warrior. One who could access all six Affinities: Flame, Wave, Storm, Stone, Bloom… and Shade.)"
"(The method? Sacrifice both parents. Infuse the child with a meteorite fragment, the Hollow Vein.)"
"(It worked… once.
And that 'success' was Kaen.)"
"(His body survived. But the cost was permanent.)"
"(His soul fractured. His Shinrei sealed under a cursed mark.)"
"(The world calls him cursed. But I know the truth.)"
"(He was built to carry every type of Shinrei… and no one else remembers that but me.)"
DetailI AM EXTRA IN A SHONEN MANGAby THE_V1S1ONNovelFantasyGolden Tickets--Views158.6KPower Stones--#ACTION#ADVENTURE#ROMANCE#REINCARNATION#MAGIC#COMEDY#MYSTERY#SURVIVAL#TRAGEDYKhael Corzedar always felt different but waking up in another world as a side character in his favorite manga turn to anime wasn't what he expected. Once known as Shigeo Smith, a half-Japanese, half-American high school student and passionate anime fan, he's now reborn as a minor background character in the world of Kaen Eclipse, the manga he loved growing up. He remembers every chapter, every fight, every tragic twist. The world of Elysera runs on Shinrei, a spiritual energy powered by emotion. It is a realm where only those who open their Vein Gates can become Veinwalkers, warriors whose hearts fuel their power. The story's hero, Kaen Suro, is a cursed orphan with uncontrollable shade Affinity. In the manga, Kaen trains at a brutal Veinwalker academy, builds powerful friendships, and eventually rises to fight the monstrous Voidborn emotion-corrupted beings of destruction. Shigeo now Khael knows how the story ends. But in this world, he's just an extra. One of many. A background name. A side character fated to die off-screen. Or so the story was. Armed with the knowledge of the original plot and the unpredictable nature of emotions, Khael Corzedar decides to forge his own path; to live, protect, and maybe even change the fate of Kaen Suro himself. Can an extra rewrite the story of a chosen one? Or will he vanish like a shadow in the background, as fate demands?
More
288 Chapters UpdatedLatest update 20d agoReviews3MoreMiyaball6 months agoI do not want to be mean. I think story has potential but writing is okay and weird.
Why is it so long why it feel like I am reading a wiki article sometime. I do not understand.
I think the concept is very good but maybe you can try again and fix errors. I will still give 5 star but author please be better.
Melon.
22THE_V1S1ON6 months agoShameless Author's Rating 💯
Hey guys! Honestly, out of everything I've written so far, this is the novel I'm most proud of. It's the one I truly love creating. My inspiration comes from a mix of iconic anime series like Naruto, Bleach, One Piece, Demon Slayer, Dragon Ball, Jujutsu Kaisen, and many more. But if I had to name my biggest influence, it's definitely Naruto. It's been my favorite since day one, and a huge part of my storytelling style and character development comes from the lessons and emotions I've felt watching it.
That said, I'm still learning and improving, so I'd really appreciate it if you could rate my novel so far. Let me know what you liked, and more importantly, what my flaws are, whether in the plot, pacing, character arcs, or writing style. Your feedback matters a lot to me, and I'm open to changing and growing as a writer. 🙏
Thanks in advance for the support and for reading my work! 💛
4bennet_Kelly3 months agoWow, I just finished reading your story and I'm seriously impressed. The pacing and tone have such visual strength, I could instantly see it as a comic sequence in my head.
I work on commission-based comic art, and your writing really sparked a lot of creative thoughts. No pressure at all, I just wanted to say it really inspired me.
If you ever want to explore that side of it, I'm on Discord (bennett_lol) or Instagram (@eve_verse_).
Rate this bookChapter 1Prologue – I'm Inside the Manga?! The sky looked drawn.
That was the first thing Khael Corzedar thought as he stared upward, eyes squinting at a blue so perfect it couldn't possibly be real. Not like this. Not with clouds shaped like brushstrokes, drifting lazily across a sky colored like an anime background—soft gradients, no pixelation, no smog, no sunspots. Just… surreal beauty.
He was lying in a field of knee-high grass. A breeze tickled his arms.
No buildings. No phones. No sky noise. Just silence.
"What… where…"
He pushed himself up on trembling elbows, only to suddenly—
WHACK!
"AGHH—!!"
A fist struck him in the face, snapping his head to the side. He tumbled backward into the grass with a yelp.
"Gotcha!" a boy's voice said, followed by laughter.
Khael groaned. "What the hell—?!"
From the corner of his now-watering eye, he saw two figures just ahead.
One was a boy with spiky black hair, laughing mischievously as he rubbed his knuckles. The other a girl, scowling with crossed arms. Her silver-white hair shimmered in the light, the soft pink in her braid catching the sun like rose silk.
She was beautiful. Unreal. Like a watercolor dream.
Silver-white hair… lavender eyes… Echo runes glowing faintly on her hands…
Lira Valenne.
Her name burst into his brain like a memory he didn't know he had.
"That wasn't funny, Kaen!" she said, cheeks puffed in frustration.
Kaen.
Khael froze. His heart skipped a beat.
Kaen… Kaen Suro…
All Affinity. Shade Echo Mark. The cursed protagonist of Kaen Eclipse.
"No way… No freaking way…"
Khael clutched his forehead. Flashes poured into his mind like a torrent: volumes stacked on his shelf, late-night rereads, theorizing plot twists online—
He stared at the spiky-haired boy again. The same red-orange ember tips. The same reckless grin.
"This is Kaen Eclipse," he muttered. "I'm inside the manga world."
He stumbled back a few steps, heart pounding.
This isn't the first chapter… It's not Chapter 1 yet…
Wait. Chapter 1 started on the 21st day of Academy Arrival. They said it clearly in the panel.
He looked around. Trees in bloom. Training grounds in the far distance. Students lounging in uniforms.
That means… today is the 19th day.
I'm here… a day before the story begins.
And yet, he wasn't some random NPC. He had a body. A name. Memories… hazy, but present.
The name Khael Corzedar echoed in his ears like it belonged to him and it did.
He could remember walking halls in this academy, awkward conversations, failing to manifest an Affinity… It was fuzzy, like someone else's dream stitched into his mind.
But it was his now.
He wasn't just Shigeo Smith anymore. That boy, who once lay in bed reading this very manga, had died.
And now he was Khael.
He'd grown up reading Kaen Eclipse, a shonen masterpiece about a cursed boy rising from nothing. He'd reread it. Lived in its pages. He even cried when it ended. So many characters died. So many twists. Kaen Suro, the protagonist, had gone from outcast to hero to legend.
But the world was cruel. It always had been.
And now… he was here. Somehow.
Chapter 2Chapter 1 – Extra Observe After that day…
"(Anyway, Today's the 20th day. Chapter 1 of the manga started on the 21st)."
"(They use a different calendar here—one based on emotions. Ten months, thirty-six days each. Right now, it's the 20th day of Umbraen.)"
"(That's the Shade month. The one linked to fear… and Voidborn activity.)"
The academy was already alive with the hum of training Echo fields, Shinrei pulses dancing in the air like glimmers of heat. Yet I couldn't focus on the echoes or the drills. Not when he was standing right there.
Kaen Suro.
He stood in the middle of the courtyard, arms crossed, jaw clenched, eyes narrowed at the training dummy in front of him. Behind him, students gave him wide berth—just like in the manga.
To them, Kaen was the cursed outcast.
To me… he was the main character.
"Kaen… The loser. The loner. The one marked by Voidrot."
He couldn't even use his Echo properly in the early chapters. I remember reading it, back when I was still Shigeo Smith, lying under my blanket with a flashlight like a weeb detective.
Back then, he was known as "The Silent Flame."
A joke of a nickname. He couldn't even summon fire.
But… I knew the truth.
"Chapter 1 of the manga. The day Kaen's seal cracked—by accident. When he used Shade Shinrei for the first time."
That day came after his mentor nearly died. Emotionally triggered, Kaen's Vein Gates burst open, unleashing a surge of unstable Shade energy. Everyone thought it was a fluke.
It wasn't.
He was never just a Flame-type user.
He was everything.
Every Affinity… was his.
But the Shade was blocking them.
No the seal was.
…
💀 Lore Log – The Forbidden Seal
A mental note written in Khael's mind.
"(Kaen's Forbidden Seal channels Shinrei through a corrupted flow.
It enhances power massively but it poisons stability.
Worse, it sends out signals… to Voidborn.)"
"(The Seal is Voidrot's beacon. It was created during the Eclipse Rite an ancient ritual performed by the Suro Clan.)"
"(They wanted to forge the ultimate warrior. One who could access all six Affinities: Flame, Wave, Storm, Stone, Bloom… and Shade.)"
"(The method? Sacrifice both parents. Infuse the child with a meteorite fragment, the Hollow Vein.)"
"(It worked… once.
And that 'success' was Kaen.)"
"(His body survived. But the cost was permanent.)"
"(His soul fractured. His Shinrei sealed under a cursed mark.)"
"(The world calls him cursed. But I know the truth.)"
"(He was built to carry every type of Shinrei… and no one else remembers that but me.)"
Back in the courtyard, Kaen raised his hand, staring at it like he hated it.
No flame. No glow. Just frustration.
"(You'll awaken soon. The manga said so. Tomorrow maybe. Or the day after.)"
I sat beneath a tree nearby, pretending to write in my Echo Observation journal.
Just an extra.
A name in the background.
But I know the story…
I know the secret the world has forgotten.
And maybe if I stay close to Kaen I can survive long enough to rewrite the ending.
Because I remember how this story ends.
And it's not happy.
I kept watching Kaen from the tree's shade, scribbling in my Echo notebook, when—
"Hey. What are you doing here again?"
The voice cut through the courtyard like a blade. Sharp. Polished. Commanding.
Kaen didn't flinch. He just turned slowly to look at the speaker.
And I knew that face immediately.
Rael Eluron.
The golden boy of Veyl Academy.
Top student. Bloom Affinity. Duelist and Healer. Kaen's main rival in the manga.
Thirteen years old, but already standing like a war-hardened commander. His platinum hair shimmered in the Umbraen light, neatly tied behind him with a noble ribbon. His emerald-green eyes were cold and narrow not with cruelty, but with certainty.
That kind of certainty that only came from legacy.
Rael's white uniform practically gleamed pristine, spotless, modified with golden embroidery that marked him as a Lunar Sage Candidate. On his hip rested a thin, sealed Shinrei scabbard. No one else dared carry one like that unless they could manifest the blade to match.
Kaen said nothing. Just returned the gaze.
"Here it comes." I thought, holding my breath.
Rael's eyes narrowed.
"This courtyard is for official Veinwalk training. You're not even classified as active-use yet. You're wasting space."
Kaen didn't respond. He let him talk first.
Rael sighed, turning his head slightly in disgust.
"You're unstable. The Seal on your back makes the other students nervous. You're lucky the instructors haven't transferred you to the Echo Dorms yet."
Echo Dorms. The holding cells for Affinity-failed students or borderline Voidrot cases.
Harsh.
"This is exactly how their rivalry started…" I noted silently.
Rael turned to walk away, but paused—almost for dramatic effect.
"Your presence weakens the emotional flow of others. You're a danger to our Gate harmonics."
Translation: You mess with everyone's vibe.
Which, in a world where emotion powers your combat ability, actually makes sense.
I watched him walk away, golden Shinrei energy flickering faintly at his heels.
Rael wasn't just a prodigy.
He had Bloodline Veins a hereditary gift from the Eluron family, the most respected Bloom clan in Elysera.
Their bloodline skill: Copy Echo arts
They could temporarily replicate techniques from any Affinity they've formed resonance with.
Rael himself had mastered three outside of Bloom: Wind, Stone, and Lightning.
He couldn't use everything, that's why he could only copy 3 affinities, he made lethal which is Wind, Stone and Lightning.
And then there was his Spirit Contract.
Seraphis, the Verdant Mirror.
A high-rank Shinrei Spirit bound to the Eluron line. Said to enhance perception, healing, and echo art
Some even said it made Rael's Lumen Blade almost sentient.
Kaen had nothing.
No Affinity. No Spirit. No rank. Just a cursed seal and a past no one knew.
And yet… I remembered how the story went.
Kaen would surpass Rael.
Not through privilege.
But through pain.
As Kaen clenched his fists, his whole body trembling not out of fear, but from something deeper.
Humiliation. Rage. That buried feeling of being treated like a mistake.
And then—
"Just you wait!"
"I'll beat you!!!"
His voice cracked, loud enough to turn heads in the courtyard. A few students paused mid-drill, glancing over.
Rael stopped mid-step, back still turned.
Slowly, he looked over his shoulder. His expression didn't change—calm, composed—but his brow lifted ever so slightly.
"hmmm?"
A single word. Smooth. Mocking. Like a noble unbothered by an insect buzzing too loudly.
Kaen's teeth clenched. His voice faltered now.
"I said I'll beat you. One day. I don't care how much power you were born with…"
He stepped forward, fists shaking.
"You think you're better because your Echo glows gold? Because your Spirit can heal you while you fight?!"
His eyes burned not with Shinrei. Not yet. But with raw fury.
"Even if I had nothing. I'm still standing here!"
Rael turned fully, his gaze cold now, calculating.
"And that is supposed to impress me?"
"A barking dog still has no fangs."
"Loser"
Then he turned away, walking off without another word.
I watched Kaen stand there, trembling.
He hadn't realized it, but something had shifted. Around him, the air shimmered—barely perceptible. A flicker in the Shinrei field.
His seal... it's stirring.
The emotional trigger. It's coming.
Tomorrow's the 21st.
That's when the Vein Gates crack.
And everything begins.
…..
Kaen's POV
As I watched that bastard walk away, shoulders straight, chin up, like he was better than everyone else—
Tch.
That face. So smug. So clean.
So damn punchable.
I clenched my fists tight enough that my knuckles cracked.
"Rael Eluron…"
Just saying his name in my head makes my blood boil. Always calm. Always perfect. Never raised his voice. Never missed a mark. The golden boy with the golden glow and the stupid hair ribbon that somehow made him look cooler.
He's everything I'm not.
And he knows it.
He looked at me like I was a mistake. Like I shouldn't even be standing in the same courtyard.
"Argh—!" I gritted my teeth, my voice low.
"Just you wait… I'll train. I'll get stronger. And then…"
"I'll beat you. I'll surpass every single one of you who look down on me."
I looked at my hands. No glow. No flame. Just skin. Just shaking.
The Seal still locks it away.
My power. My Shinrei. My everything.
But one day, it'll crack. I'll force it to.
And when it does…
I'll rise.
My dream hasn't changed.
It never will.
I'm going to become an Eclipse Vanguard.
That's not just a rank. That's legend.
Field Veinwalkers.
The real ones. The operatives who leave the Academy and go on missions across the five zones.
Warriors. Medics. Sealers. Assassins. Espers.
DetailI AM EXTRA IN A SHONEN MANGAby THE_V1S1ONNovelFantasyGolden Tickets--Views158.6KPower Stones--#ACTION#ADVENTURE#ROMANCE#REINCARNATION#MAGIC#COMEDY#MYSTERY#SURVIVAL#TRAGEDYKhael Corzedar always felt different but waking up in another world as a side character in his favorite manga turn to anime wasn't what he expected. Once known as Shigeo Smith, a half-Japanese, half-American high school student and passionate anime fan, he's now reborn as a minor background character in the world of Kaen Eclipse, the manga he loved growing up. He remembers every chapter, every fight, every tragic twist. The world of Elysera runs on Shinrei, a spiritual energy powered by emotion. It is a realm where only those who open their Vein Gates can become Veinwalkers, warriors whose hearts fuel their power. The story's hero, Kaen Suro, is a cursed orphan with uncontrollable shade Affinity. In the manga, Kaen trains at a brutal Veinwalker academy, builds powerful friendships, and eventually rises to fight the monstrous Voidborn emotion-corrupted beings of destruction. Shigeo now Khael knows how the story ends. But in this world, he's just an extra. One of many. A background name. A side character fated to die off-screen. Or so the story was. Armed with the knowledge of the original plot and the unpredictable nature of emotions, Khael Corzedar decides to forge his own path; to live, protect, and maybe even change the fate of Kaen Suro himself. Can an extra rewrite the story of a chosen one? Or will he vanish like a shadow in the background, as fate demands?
More
288 Chapters UpdatedLatest update 20d agoReviews3MoreMiyaball6 months agoI do not want to be mean. I think story has potential but writing is okay and weird.
Why is it so long why it feel like I am reading a wiki article sometime. I do not understand.
I think the concept is very good but maybe you can try again and fix errors. I will still give 5 star but author please be better.
Melon.
22THE_V1S1ON6 months agoShameless Author's Rating 💯
Hey guys! Honestly, out of everything I've written so far, this is the novel I'm most proud of. It's the one I truly love creating. My inspiration comes from a mix of iconic anime series like Naruto, Bleach, One Piece, Demon Slayer, Dragon Ball, Jujutsu Kaisen, and many more. But if I had to name my biggest influence, it's definitely Naruto. It's been my favorite since day one, and a huge part of my storytelling style and character development comes from the lessons and emotions I've felt watching it.
That said, I'm still learning and improving, so I'd really appreciate it if you could rate my novel so far. Let me know what you liked, and more importantly, what my flaws are, whether in the plot, pacing, character arcs, or writing style. Your feedback matters a lot to me, and I'm open to changing and growing as a writer. 🙏
Thanks in advance for the support and for reading my work! 💛
4bennet_Kelly3 months agoWow, I just finished reading your story and I'm seriously impressed. The pacing and tone have such visual strength, I could instantly see it as a comic sequence in my head.
I work on commission-based comic art, and your writing really sparked a lot of creative thoughts. No pressure at all, I just wanted to say it really inspired me.
If you ever want to explore that side of it, I'm on Discord (bennett_lol) or Instagram (@eve_verse_).
Rate this bookChapter 1Prologue – I'm Inside the Manga?! The sky looked drawn.
That was the first thing Khael Corzedar thought as he stared upward, eyes squinting at a blue so perfect it couldn't possibly be real. Not like this. Not with clouds shaped like brushstrokes, drifting lazily across a sky colored like an anime background—soft gradients, no pixelation, no smog, no sunspots. Just… surreal beauty.
He was lying in a field of knee-high grass. A breeze tickled his arms.
No buildings. No phones. No sky noise. Just silence.
"What… where…"
He pushed himself up on trembling elbows, only to suddenly—
WHACK!
"AGHH—!!"
A fist struck him in the face, snapping his head to the side. He tumbled backward into the grass with a yelp.
"Gotcha!" a boy's voice said, followed by laughter.
Khael groaned. "What the hell—?!"
From the corner of his now-watering eye, he saw two figures just ahead.
One was a boy with spiky black hair, laughing mischievously as he rubbed his knuckles. The other a girl, scowling with crossed arms. Her silver-white hair shimmered in the light, the soft pink in her braid catching the sun like rose silk.
She was beautiful. Unreal. Like a watercolor dream.
Silver-white hair… lavender eyes… Echo runes glowing faintly on her hands…
Lira Valenne.
Her name burst into his brain like a memory he didn't know he had.
"That wasn't funny, Kaen!" she said, cheeks puffed in frustration.
Kaen.
Khael froze. His heart skipped a beat.
Kaen… Kaen Suro…
All Affinity. Shade Echo Mark. The cursed protagonist of Kaen Eclipse.
"No way… No freaking way…"
Khael clutched his forehead. Flashes poured into his mind like a torrent: volumes stacked on his shelf, late-night rereads, theorizing plot twists online—
He stared at the spiky-haired boy again. The same red-orange ember tips. The same reckless grin.
"This is Kaen Eclipse," he muttered. "I'm inside the manga world."
He stumbled back a few steps, heart pounding.
This isn't the first chapter… It's not Chapter 1 yet…
Wait. Chapter 1 started on the 21st day of Academy Arrival. They said it clearly in the panel.
He looked around. Trees in bloom. Training grounds in the far distance. Students lounging in uniforms.
That means… today is the 19th day.
I'm here… a day before the story begins.
And yet, he wasn't some random NPC. He had a body. A name. Memories… hazy, but present.
The name Khael Corzedar echoed in his ears like it belonged to him and it did.
He could remember walking halls in this academy, awkward conversations, failing to manifest an Affinity… It was fuzzy, like someone else's dream stitched into his mind.
But it was his now.
He wasn't just Shigeo Smith anymore. That boy, who once lay in bed reading this very manga, had died.
And now he was Khael.
He'd grown up reading Kaen Eclipse, a shonen masterpiece about a cursed boy rising from nothing. He'd reread it. Lived in its pages. He even cried when it ended. So many characters died. So many twists. Kaen Suro, the protagonist, had gone from outcast to hero to legend.
But the world was cruel. It always had been.
And now… he was here. Somehow.
Chapter 2Chapter 1 – Extra Observe After that day…
"(Anyway, Today's the 20th day. Chapter 1 of the manga started on the 21st)."
"(They use a different calendar here—one based on emotions. Ten months, thirty-six days each. Right now, it's the 20th day of Umbraen.)"
"(That's the Shade month. The one linked to fear… and Voidborn activity.)"
The academy was already alive with the hum of training Echo fields, Shinrei pulses dancing in the air like glimmers of heat. Yet I couldn't focus on the echoes or the drills. Not when he was standing right there.
Kaen Suro.
He stood in the middle of the courtyard, arms crossed, jaw clenched, eyes narrowed at the training dummy in front of him. Behind him, students gave him wide berth—just like in the manga.
To them, Kaen was the cursed outcast.
To me… he was the main character.
"Kaen… The loser. The loner. The one marked by Voidrot."
He couldn't even use his Echo properly in the early chapters. I remember reading it, back when I was still Shigeo Smith, lying under my blanket with a flashlight like a weeb detective.
Back then, he was known as "The Silent Flame."
A joke of a nickname. He couldn't even summon fire.
But… I knew the truth.
"Chapter 1 of the manga. The day Kaen's seal cracked—by accident. When he used Shade Shinrei for the first time."
That day came after his mentor nearly died. Emotionally triggered, Kaen's Vein Gates burst open, unleashing a surge of unstable Shade energy. Everyone thought it was a fluke.
It wasn't.
He was never just a Flame-type user.
He was everything.
Every Affinity… was his.
But the Shade was blocking them.
No the seal was.
…
💀 Lore Log – The Forbidden Seal
A mental note written in Khael's mind.
"(Kaen's Forbidden Seal channels Shinrei through a corrupted flow.
It enhances power massively but it poisons stability.
Worse, it sends out signals… to Voidborn.)"
"(The Seal is Voidrot's beacon. It was created during the Eclipse Rite an ancient ritual performed by the Suro Clan.)"
"(They wanted to forge the ultimate warrior. One who could access all six Affinities: Flame, Wave, Storm, Stone, Bloom… and Shade.)"
"(The method? Sacrifice both parents. Infuse the child with a meteorite fragment, the Hollow Vein.)"
"(It worked… once.
And that 'success' was Kaen.)"
"(His body survived. But the cost was permanent.)"
"(His soul fractured. His Shinrei sealed under a cursed mark.)"
"(The world calls him cursed. But I know the truth.)"
"(He was built to carry every type of Shinrei… and no one else remembers that but me.)"
Back in the courtyard, Kaen raised his hand, staring at it like he hated it.
No flame. No glow. Just frustration.
"(You'll awaken soon. The manga said so. Tomorrow maybe. Or the day after.)"
I sat beneath a tree nearby, pretending to write in my Echo Observation journal.
Just an extra.
A name in the background.
But I know the story…
I know the secret the world has forgotten.
And maybe if I stay close to Kaen I can survive long enough to rewrite the ending.
Because I remember how this story ends.
And it's not happy.
I kept watching Kaen from the tree's shade, scribbling in my Echo notebook, when—
"Hey. What are you doing here again?"
The voice cut through the courtyard like a blade. Sharp. Polished. Commanding.
Kaen didn't flinch. He just turned slowly to look at the speaker.
And I knew that face immediately.
Rael Eluron.
The golden boy of Veyl Academy.
Top student. Bloom Affinity. Duelist and Healer. Kaen's main rival in the manga.
Thirteen years old, but already standing like a war-hardened commander. His platinum hair shimmered in the Umbraen light, neatly tied behind him with a noble ribbon. His emerald-green eyes were cold and narrow not with cruelty, but with certainty.
That kind of certainty that only came from legacy.
Rael's white uniform practically gleamed pristine, spotless, modified with golden embroidery that marked him as a Lunar Sage Candidate. On his hip rested a thin, sealed Shinrei scabbard. No one else dared carry one like that unless they could manifest the blade to match.
Kaen said nothing. Just returned the gaze.
"Here it comes." I thought, holding my breath.
Rael's eyes narrowed.
"This courtyard is for official Veinwalk training. You're not even classified as active-use yet. You're wasting space."
Kaen didn't respond. He let him talk first.
Rael sighed, turning his head slightly in disgust.
"You're unstable. The Seal on your back makes the other students nervous. You're lucky the instructors haven't transferred you to the Echo Dorms yet."
Echo Dorms. The holding cells for Affinity-failed students or borderline Voidrot cases.
Harsh.
"This is exactly how their rivalry started…" I noted silently.
Rael turned to walk away, but paused—almost for dramatic effect.
"Your presence weakens the emotional flow of others. You're a danger to our Gate harmonics."
Translation: You mess with everyone's vibe.
Which, in a world where emotion powers your combat ability, actually makes sense.
I watched him walk away, golden Shinrei energy flickering faintly at his heels.
Rael wasn't just a prodigy.
He had Bloodline Veins a hereditary gift from the Eluron family, the most respected Bloom clan in Elysera.
Their bloodline skill: Copy Echo arts
They could temporarily replicate techniques from any Affinity they've formed resonance with.
Rael himself had mastered three outside of Bloom: Wind, Stone, and Lightning.
He couldn't use everything, that's why he could only copy 3 affinities, he made lethal which is Wind, Stone and Lightning.
And then there was his Spirit Contract.
Seraphis, the Verdant Mirror.
A high-rank Shinrei Spirit bound to the Eluron line. Said to enhance perception, healing, and echo art
Some even said it made Rael's Lumen Blade almost sentient.
Kaen had nothing.
No Affinity. No Spirit. No rank. Just a cursed seal and a past no one knew.
And yet… I remembered how the story went.
Kaen would surpass Rael.
Not through privilege.
But through pain.
As Kaen clenched his fists, his whole body trembling not out of fear, but from something deeper.
Humiliation. Rage. That buried feeling of being treated like a mistake.
And then—
"Just you wait!"
"I'll beat you!!!"
His voice cracked, loud enough to turn heads in the courtyard. A few students paused mid-drill, glancing over.
Rael stopped mid-step, back still turned.
Slowly, he looked over his shoulder. His expression didn't change—calm, composed—but his brow lifted ever so slightly.
"hmmm?"
A single word. Smooth. Mocking. Like a noble unbothered by an insect buzzing too loudly.
Kaen's teeth clenched. His voice faltered now.
"I said I'll beat you. One day. I don't care how much power you were born with…"
He stepped forward, fists shaking.
"You think you're better because your Echo glows gold? Because your Spirit can heal you while you fight?!"
His eyes burned not with Shinrei. Not yet. But with raw fury.
"Even if I had nothing. I'm still standing here!"
Rael turned fully, his gaze cold now, calculating.
"And that is supposed to impress me?"
"A barking dog still has no fangs."
"Loser"
Then he turned away, walking off without another word.
I watched Kaen stand there, trembling.
He hadn't realized it, but something had shifted. Around him, the air shimmered—barely perceptible. A flicker in the Shinrei field.
His seal... it's stirring.
The emotional trigger. It's coming.
Tomorrow's the 21st.
That's when the Vein Gates crack.
And everything begins.
…..
Kaen's POV
As I watched that bastard walk away, shoulders straight, chin up, like he was better than everyone else—
Tch.
That face. So smug. So clean.
So damn punchable.
I clenched my fists tight enough that my knuckles cracked.
"Rael Eluron…"
Just saying his name in my head makes my blood boil. Always calm. Always perfect. Never raised his voice. Never missed a mark. The golden boy with the golden glow and the stupid hair ribbon that somehow made him look cooler.
He's everything I'm not.
And he knows it.
He looked at me like I was a mistake. Like I shouldn't even be standing in the same courtyard.
"Argh—!" I gritted my teeth, my voice low.
"Just you wait… I'll train. I'll get stronger. And then…"
"I'll beat you. I'll surpass every single one of you who look down on me."
I looked at my hands. No glow. No flame. Just skin. Just shaking.
The Seal still locks it away.
My power. My Shinrei. My everything.
But one day, it'll crack. I'll force it to.
And when it does…
I'll rise.
My dream hasn't changed.
It never will.
I'm going to become an Eclipse Vanguard.
That's not just a rank. That's legend.
Field Veinwalkers.
The real ones. The operatives who leave the Academy and go on missions across the five zones.
Warriors. Medics. Sealers. Assassins. Espers.
Badge Colors:
🟢 Green Veinwalker – Junior Rank (Fresh graduates)
🔵 Blue Veinwalker – Senior Rank (Experienced)
🔴 Crimson Veinwalker – Elite Rank (Squad Leaders, War-tested)
⚫ Eclipse Vanguard – Myth-tier. Legendary. Barely more than ten alive today.
And above all of them…
The Eclipse Order.
Twelve Lunar Sages who rule over everything. They decide who lives, who dies, and what knowledge gets erased.
That's where I'm going.
I gritted my teeth again, turning toward the training dummies in the empty sector. Everyone had cleared out after Rael left probably disgusted or maybe afraid of me.
Good.
Let them believe that.
Let them whisper behind my back and cross the courtyard when they see me coming.
Because one day?
They'll be whispering for a different reason.
One day, they'll say: "There goes Kaen Suro… Eclipse Vanguard. The handsome guy... More popular than Rael."
I took a slow breath and looked at the training dummies lined up ahead charred and cracked from failed attempts.
That's right. That's where I'm going. To the top. Even if the Seal rips my soul apart getting there.
Even if the Void whispers louder every day.
But…
A wicked grin suddenly tugged at the edge of my mouth.
"Well…" I muttered to myself, stretching out my arms with a light pop,
"Guess I should lighten the mood a little."
I turned away from the dummies and started walking.
"I'm gonna prank someone again. hehehe."
…
The east courtyard was tense. You could feel it in the air. The sparring dome nearby crackled with leftover Shinrei energy, like quiet static. Students stood on the edges, unsure if they should step in or stay back and watch what was happening.
A boy from the Taishin class was lying on the ground, a cut on his lip and his Echo-band broken. He had clearly lost the spar.
Standing protectively over him was Juno Arkai. Calm. Cold. His face was hard to read as he stared across the courtyard at the girl who had struck his classmate.
Ceyla Nox wiped blood from her dagger. Her violet Shinrei flickered faintly around her. Her expression was blank, but her body was tense—like a storm about to break.
"Apologize to my friend," Juno said, his voice low but firm.
Ceyla turned. A sharp, cruel smile tugged at her lips.
"Why should I?" she replied casually. "An Affinity-less isn't worth apologizing for."
The other students watching flinched. Even the wind seemed to pause.
Juno stepped forward slowly. His stance changed—subtle, smooth. He lowered into his Taishin form. Dust stirred under his feet.
"You're strong. I won't deny that," he said evenly.
"But that doesn't make you right."
Ceyla's eyes narrowed. She twitched—and vanished.
Flicker Void.
In a blink, she reappeared behind Juno. Her blade sliced toward his ribs—fast and precise.
But Juno spun just in time. The blade only grazed him.
"Too slow, monk boy," she muttered.
Juno didn't speak. He moved into a spinning step, the mark of Taishin technique. His fist came forward not heavy, but exact.
Vein Strike.
It hit her forearm, and she gasped. Her arm went limp, and the Shinrei energy in her hand flickered out.
"Tch... lucky hit," Ceyla spat, stepping back with clenched teeth.
They faced each other. Neither moved. The air grew heavier as emotions swirled. Above them, the sky darkened—reflecting the anger and despair building inside Ceyla.
Then a voice cut through everything.
"That's enough."
A man stepped into the courtyard. Instantly, everyone fell silent.
It was Sensei Kurozawa.
He wore long, dark robes that flowed like shadows. His presence was heavy, commanding. His eyes one silver, the other clouded white—moved across the scene like a blade.
"This is a school. Not a warzone," he said firmly. "If either of you keeps going, you'll spar with me next."
There was no anger in his voice. He didn't need it.
Juno stepped back and bowed slightly.
"...Understood, Sensei."
Ceyla didn't respond right away. Her jaw tensed. Her fingers curled tightly.
"...Whatever," she muttered.
Kurozawa stepped closer to her, stopping just a breath away.
"You think being stronger makes you right?" he asked quietly.
Ceyla looked away. Her dagger hand trembled.
"Storm Affinity comes from despair, not hate," he said coldly. "You're twisting it. That's not power. That's pain."
She flinched.
Just a little.
But she flinched.
Kurozawa said nothing more. He turned away.
Juno went to his injured classmate and helped him up. No words were exchanged. No victory claimed.
Ceyla walked away slowly. Her steps were steady, but her hand still trembled.
Not from injury.
But from something else.
Kurozawa watched her leave. His voice dropped to a whisper.
"She's breaking... and she doesn't even know it yet."
To be continue