"Then I'll head back now. Bye."
"Wait, Noah, you…"
Lila opened her mouth as if there was something she wanted to say, but hesitation stopped the words at her lips.
"What's up?" Noah asked.
"What did you think of my singing today?"
"It was really good." There was no flattery in his voice. He genuinely thought she'd done well. He lifted his thumb. "Honestly, I think it sounded great. First place should've been yours."
A soft, sweet smile appeared at the corner of her lips, her eyes curving like crescent moons. "Thank you."
"What are you thanking me for? I'm just telling the truth."
Noah waved lightly and turned away, leaving from beneath the dorm building. Lila watched his retreating back, tugged her coat tighter around herself, and let out a breath that fogged white in the air.
It was getting colder and colder.
—
The screen turned gray the instant the health bar emptied, announcing yet another character death. Moments later, the base was destroyed, and the word Defeat flashed across the screen.
Noah sighed, exited the game, and disconnected from voice chat with his roommates.
Sometimes, when he had free time, his roommates dragged him into online games. Winning or losing didn't really matter. It was just about laughing together and passing the time.
Besides, the game wasn't exactly beginner-friendly. Noah rarely played on his own and never got hooked.
He turned his head and glanced out the window. Autumn and winter made the sky darken early. The sun was almost gone, the last trace of light being pulled away. He shut down Evelyn's computer and sent her a message on his phone.
Noah: Sis, are you coming back soon?
Evelyn: Just finished grading papers. On my way.
Noah: I'm at your place. Be careful.
Evelyn: Mm. Almost there.
Noah stood up, rummaged through the cabinet, pulled out the bag of brown sugar that was still more than half full, filled the kettle with water, plugged it in, and set it to boil.
By his count, Evelyn's period should be coming any day now.
Somehow, he'd been coming here more and more often. Her apartment was starting to feel like his second dorm.
He knew exactly where everything was placed, every corner of the room. The only exception was the drawer in the middle of her desk, always locked. He had never seen what was inside.
Even her closet had become familiar to him, after helping her grab clothes more than once.
Before the kettle finished heating, the sound of the door opening came from outside. Noah got up to greet her and caught sight of Evelyn changing her shoes in the entryway.
"Sis, you're back."
"Mm. It was busy today. I'm home late."
She slipped her feet, wrapped in white thermal socks, out of her boots and into the cotton house slippers by the rug. A stretch of pale skin showed beneath the hem of her skirt, her slender calves catching the light.
Noticing his gaze, she smiled slyly. "Do my feet look nice?"
"They're… they're nice. Everything about you looks nice," Noah said, turning his head to hide his embarrassment. "Did you eat dinner yet?"
"Not yet. Are you hungry? I can cook."
"No, no. I bought food from the cafeteria. It's still warm."
He actually wanted to cook for her, but with his cooking skills, anything he made would be a punishment rather than a meal. He could deal with that himself, but he couldn't put Evelyn through it.
He carried the food into the room. Evelyn followed him in after changing her shoes, watching as he took the containers out of the bag and opened them. She smiled faintly. "Why are you being so good today?"
"You worked so hard today. Of course I should help share the load."
He unplugged the kettle, poured hot water over the brown sugar, and handed the mug to her. "Sis, um… have you been having stomach pain these past few days?"
"You remember that clearly?" She took a sip of the warm drink, her lips curving. "You really know everything about your sister. But why does it feel like you're hiding something from me?"
"Am I? I don't think I'm hiding anything."
"Then what were you rushing off to do right after the exam today?"
"I… I really needed to use the bathroom," Noah said, forcing himself to sound calm as he lied.
He knew Evelyn didn't like him being around Lila. Covering it up was better for everyone. It was best if she didn't know.
"Really?"
"Yeah, really. I swear."
Evelyn silently finished the steaming mug of brown sugar water. Then she stood up, walked over, sat on the edge of the bed, and patted her thigh.
"Get over here."
"Why, sis? I didn't lie."
"Don't make me say it twice."
Her voice carried a chill, as if she was genuinely about to get angry. Noah swallowed hard, then nervously leaned over her legs, turning his head to look at her with a pitiful, wronged expression.
"You really think your sister doesn't know what you went to do, trying to lie to me?" She brought her hand down hard on his backside. "Was the competition fun? Did you go out of your way just to see Lila perform?"
"Ow, ow—sis, that hurts. Go a little lighter."
"Lighter? Why don't you try being a little more obedient? Now you know it hurts?"
She showed him no mercy at all. The slap burned hot, the pain sharp and overwhelming, hitting him physically and mentally at once. He instinctively tried to get up and escape, only to be pressed firmly back down.
"We're still friends, at least," he argued weakly, giving up on being clever. "Isn't it normal to go cheer her on?"
"What's more important, cheering her on or listening to your sister? And you even dared to lie to me?" Another slap landed.
Of course his sister was the most important. Blood relation or not, Evelyn was one of the few people in his life he couldn't do without.
No matter how unreasonable her demands were, she always came first.
"And there's more," she added sharply, glaring at him. "Do you know how you did in the competition?"
"I… don't know. I think I did okay."
"Eighty-two points. Third place."
"That's not bad at all." Noah turned his head and smiled stupidly.
"I personally reviewed everything with you," Evelyn said, lifting her hand and bringing it down again. "I taught you those exact problem types, and you still got them wrong. And you think that's good? Were you just thinking about finishing early so you could run off to watch the performance?"
"I wasn't…"
He was an adult now. This kind of punishment wasn't enough to make him cry outright. But intense pain still overstimulated his nerves, and before he realized it, moisture gathered at the corners of his eyes.
"So you really have to push your sister until she gets angry, Noah, you really—"
She raised her hand to strike him one last time, then froze midair when she saw his eyes, glassy and red despite his effort to hide it.
"Noah… you… you're crying?"
She remembered it clearly. Noah had almost never cried growing up. And in her memories, the image of tears seeping out from beneath a blindfold was branded into her mind like evidence of a crime.
She knew exactly what she feared most, what she never wanted to face again.
That was her sin. And her nightmare.
"Noah, I'm sorry… I'm sorry."
—
"I'm not," Noah said, wiping at the corner of his eyes. He hadn't meant to cry over something like that. "It just… hurt too much. My eyes did that on their own."
"Are you really okay?" Evelyn lowered her hand, her voice carrying a trace of guilt.
"Not completely okay. My butt really hurts. Sis, you're not going to hit me anymore, right?"
"I won't."
Noah stood up with some difficulty and stepped back until his shoulders touched the desk. An awkward smile appeared on his face. "You really didn't hold back. You've never hit me that hard before."
"That's because you were being too reckless. If you listened, would I have to hit you?"
"That's not really…"
"Forget it. I don't want to hear your excuses." She cut him off. "Hurry up and eat. It's getting cold."
In Evelyn's eyes, there were only two states for him: obedient or not. Everything else came after that. If he was hers, then he should listen absolutely. It meant she hadn't trained him well enough.
They returned to the table. The food was still warm.
Her gaze drifted to the porcelain bowl with traces of brown sugar water still clinging to the sides. "I should still thank you, though."
"Hm?" He followed her eyes. "That's just what I should do. You take such good care of me."
"Then you should listen."
"I… I'll try."
He gave her a half-hearted smile. She didn't respond.
By the time they finished eating, the sky outside had turned completely dark. Lights shimmered across the city, bright and restless beneath the night.
"Sis, I'll head back now?"
"You're that eager to leave? I'm not going to eat you," she said, tilting her head, studying his face.
"I need to go shower. I don't have clothes here."
"Wait a bit. Sit with me."
She stood and left the room under his puzzled gaze, taking the kettle with her. When she returned a few minutes later, she held a glass of warm milk.
Noah accepted it, staring at the pale liquid rising with faint steam. He took a careful sip. "Where'd this come from? It tastes a little bitter."
"I bought it especially for you. It's good for building your strength. It wasn't cheap."
He looked at the thin layer of foam floating on top. "Is that really necessary? I'll pass my fitness test next time."
"It is necessary. Don't worry about the money. I don't mind spending it on you. Come here every night and drink this. A month or two should be enough."
"Okay… I got it. I'll go now?"
"Take this." She opened the closet and pulled out a light blue fleece hoodie. "Bought it for you a couple of days ago. Try it on when you get back. It's getting colder."
"Thanks, sis."
"Go on."
Noah returned to the dorm with the hoodie in hand. After showering, he put it on. It fit perfectly, not too tight, not too loose, as if it had been tailored to his exact measurements.
He washed the clothes he'd taken off, hung them neatly, finished confirming all his assignments were submitted, stretched, and climbed into bed early.
The dorm layout was the usual upper bunk and desk below. His bed was further inside. Through the small glass panel by the balcony door, he could see the dark sky and blurry figures moving below.
Across from them was the girls' dorm. The buildings were separated by distance and a wide flowerbed in between. At night, couples often sat there together in the shadows.
"What time's first class tomorrow?" Caleb asked suddenly.
"Eight a.m. Calculus," Noah answered. He never forgot Evelyn's class. He would never dare be late.
"Another early class. I was going to stay up and rank up tonight."
"You can just sleep in Professor Miller's class," Ryan muttered while scrolling on his phone. "She hardly ever bothers us. Except you, Noah. Better sit far away from him."
"No sleeping," Noah protested, smacking the bed frame lightly. "If I have to stay awake, so do you. Don't fail at the end of the semester."
"You could just sleep too. What's she going to do, hit you?"
"She would," Noah replied quietly. "She'd… spank me."
A burst of laughter exploded through the room.
"Are you serious?"
"Noah, you're twenty!"
"Yeah, and she's my sister. What am I supposed to do?"
"I get it now. That's why you listen to her so much."
Noah rolled onto his side, pulling the blanket over himself. "Laugh all you want. I'm sleeping."
Eventually, the laughter faded.
"They don't have a sister like that," Caleb said after a moment. "Look how much Professor Miller takes care of him."
"That's true. My sister and I fought over everything growing up," Ryan sighed. "If all I had to deal with was getting spanked, I'd take a sister like that."
Noah lay quietly, listening to their scattered conversation. He glanced at his phone one last time, replied to Evelyn and Lila's goodnight messages, and closed his eyes.
He thought the same thing Ryan had said. Even if the punishments were embarrassing, he was grateful.
Most of the care he'd ever received had come from Evelyn. Without her, he didn't know what his life would look like.
The dorm lights shut off with a sharp click. Only faint glows from phone screens remained before those, too, disappeared. Sleep came slowly.
Lately, he'd been dreaming almost every night. Fragments from childhood flickered through his mind, most of them with Evelyn in them.
A tall, graceful girl in simple white clothes, calling his childhood nickname softly in dreams. Some memories even carried hints that now made him flush with embarrassment. Back then, he had been too naive, too dependent on her.
But tonight's dream was different.
Everything was pitch black.
He couldn't see anything.
Warm, breathy sounds circled his ears. Heat. Pain. A tremble in his throat. He felt tears sliding down his face.
A damp, sticky sensation beneath him, something frantic and consuming. His wrists were pinned. He couldn't resist.
His mouth was invaded forcefully, the line between pain and something else blurred in the dark.
And through that darkness, he thought he saw a face. Beautiful. Intense. Written over with hunger.
"Noah, don't move. This time… you have to listen to your sister."