The Dinner Deadlock: 1,000% Culinary Combat
[Author's POV]
The sun had finally set, and the Watson mansion was bathed in a deceptive, peaceful glow. But inside the grand dining room, the atmosphere was more tense than a high-stakes hostage negotiation.
Bridget had taken over as "Head of Logistics" for dinner, and she had a mischievous glint in her eyes that spelled trouble for Keifer. The table was set with silver platters, but the "Empress" was currently staring at her empty plate like it was a personal insult.
The "Ice" Menu: [Jay's POV]
I sat at the head of the table, my "Double-Heir" cargo making it impossible to sit comfortably. Mamma Serina had prepared a five-course gourmet meal—truffle risotto, wagyu beef, and honey-glazed carrots.
The smell hit me.
"System... rejecting," I groaned, pushing the plate away so hard the gravy nearly hit Keigan. "It smells too... cooked. Why is everything so warm? It's aggressive!"
Keifer looked at me, his face a mask of exhausted concern. "Weify, you haven't had a 'Data Upload' (food) since the marshmallows. You need the protein for the Prince and Princess."
"I don't want protein!" I snapped, my mood swing hitting a 1,000% peak. "I want Ice Cubes. But not just any ice. I want them crushed, topped with soy sauce, and served in a chilled champagne flute!"
The Teasing Protocol: [Bridget Strikes]
Bridget let out a loud, bark-like laugh, leaning back in her chair and pointedly ignoring the "CEO" glare Keifer was sending her way.
"You heard the Boss-Lady, Keifer," Bridget teased, her voice dripping with mock-seriousness. "The Prince and Princess are requesting 'Salty Frozen Water.' Why are you sitting there like a frozen server? Get to the kitchen and start crushing."
"I am not a waiter, Bridget," Keifer growled, though he was already halfway out of his chair.
"Oh, really?" Bridget smirked, turning to the rest of the family—Keigan, Keiran, and Pappa Keizer. "Because for the last four hours, I've seen the 'Ice King' of Watson Enterprises acting like a 1,000% whipped personal assistant. I think the amnesia did more than wipe your memory, Keif—it wiped your backbone!"
Keiran snickered into his napkin. Pappa Keizer didn't even look up from his wine, but his shoulders were shaking with silent laughter.
"I am 'Optimizing' my wife's comfort!" Keifer snapped, grabbing a bag of ice from the sideboard.
"Right," Bridget continued, her eyes dancing. "Is that what you call it when she made you stand in the corner for twenty minutes because your 'breathing was too loud'? You looked like a naughty schoolboy, not a billionaire."
The Soy-Sauce Slushie: [Keifer's POV]
I ignored her. I had to. If I engaged with Bridget, the "Perimeter" would completely collapse. I focused on the task: crushing the ice to a fine, snow-like consistency. I drizzled the soy sauce over it, creating a brown, salty slush that made my own stomach do a "System Reboot" in protest.
I presented it to Jay with a flourish. "Your 'Glacial Umami,' my Empress."
Jay took a spoonful, her face instantly relaxing into a look of pure, blissful "Glow." "Oh, Keif... you're a genius. This is the only thing in this house that doesn't smell like 'Lies and Meat'."
"See?" I turned to Bridget, crossing my arms. "Result achieved. Performance: 1,000%."
"Performance: 1,000% pathetic," Bridget shot back, winking at Jay. "Hey, Jay? Since he's already in 'Service Mode,' why don't you ask him to do that thing where he sings to your belly? You know, the lullaby he wrote that sounds like a corporate anthem?"
The Final Blow
"He wrote a lullaby?!" Keigan choked on his water. "Keifer? The man who thinks music is a 'Distraction from Productivity' wrote a song?"
"It's not a song!" Keifer's face turned a shade of red that matched the wine. "It's a rhythmic 'Acoustic Bonding' exercise for the twins!"
"He sings it to the tune of the company's quarterly growth jingle," Bridget added, cackling. "I caught him doing it in the nursery. He was whispering, 'Grow, grow, my little stocks, Daddy's going to buy you golden blocks...'."
"BRIDGET! THAT IS A BREACH OF PRIVACY!"
"It's a breach of sanity, Hubby," Jay laughed, her mood swing finally landing on 'Happy.' She pulled Keifer down by his tie and kissed his reddened cheek. "But it's cute. Even if you are a 1,000% dork."
Keifer sighed, finally melting into the chair next to her, defeated by the squad, the cravings, and the "Double-Heir" chaos.
"1,000%," he muttered, reaching for a piece of dry bread. "I'm never going to hear the end of this, am I?"
"Data suggests... no," Pappa Keizer finally spoke, clinking his glass against Bridget's.