Act II – The Empire of Eternal Madness: Septem.
Cú Chulainn, go to hell.
Chiron, eat shit.
Spartacus? Let him go to hell and boil pasta there.
No, are you serious?
Do you think the story will be interesting without me? Readers need me! Only me! Gudako is one thing, but dragging this Gudao? And you want to make a plot out of this? Tarantino would write better. Idiots!
The center of this story is me! Wade Wilson! Deadpool! Do you hear? So instead of wasting time on a three-star silver Cú Chulainn, summon me – a six-star Grand Deadpool! (Pool-san, you haven't been introduced into the game yet...)
"Shut up! Get out of here, you paid lucky bastard! You summoned Meltryllis and you're bragging!"
In the luxurious chambers, the walls of which Nero had carefully ordered to be lined with red silk, Deadpool was fiddling with wooden mannequins.
"Mannequins? How crude! This is Cú Chulainn, a silver three-star. This is Chiron, a four-star Archer. And these two are the Rookie and Mash-chan."
He pointed to each doll in turn, giving them names that no one needed. Soon he got bored and started playing with himself.
"Pew-pew! Vzh-zh-zhuh! Ba-bang!"
Playing with two mannequins like toy airplanes, he self-absorbedly voiced the special effects.
"Oh... Impressive. As expected from Chir-r-ron."
"Ha-ha-ha! How do you like my skill?"
Changing voices, he staged a brawl between them for a while until the mannequin representing Chiron fell into the brazier.
"Oops. Chiron caught fire. Oops... is this a spoiler?"
"Legate! Urgent dispatch from the Emperor!"
While Deadpool was engrossed in his game, a legionary appeared before him. The mercenary looked at him hopefully, awaiting news that could dispel his boredom.
"Reporting! Balkano-Rome has been taken. We are returning to Rome soon. The 'Red Wolves' have been ordered to prepare for a campaign against Gallo-Rome. Such is the will of Emperor Nero Claudius!"
"Understood. You are dismissed."
"Glory to Rome!"
As soon as the legionary disappeared, Deadpool threw the remaining dolls into the fire and stretched. Three tedious days of idleness had finally come to an end.
"Damn the Grail, it's time to clean up this mess."
At that moment, another soldier ran up and stopped before him, gasping for breath.
"Lord Legate of Special Troops! Urgent report! There's an emergency in the palace dungeons...!"
"Huh? Dungeons? There are such things there?"
Soon, Deadpool, accompanied by a legionary, descended into the giant cavern beneath the palace. Seeing the colossal cave, the mercenary involuntarily gaped.
"And how long has this hole been here?"
"It's been here since Rome was founded. A Tree-column, grown into the largest of the seven hills. But one day the earth split open, and the tree went down, becoming a symbol supporting the heart of the empire."
Deadpool nodded understandingly.
"Psst, author, the lore feels forced, don't you think? You're phoning it in…"
Reaching the roots of the tree, Deadpool, surrounded by anxious soldiers, headed for the trunk.
"So, what happened here?"
"Legate! They say… they saw a man move inside the tree!"
A soldier, pale as a sheet, pointed with a trembling finger at the figure embedded in the wood. However, the man inside was still and showed no signs of life.
"Are you guys trying to prank me on 'Candid Camera'?! He's not moving at all. Look, is this what you call 'movement'?"
Declaring it nonsense, Deadpool slapped the man in the tree in front of the soldiers. And at that moment, the captive opened his eyes.
"Commander!! His eyes… he opened his eyes!"
"What eyes? Why are you howling like Baby Mario?!"
Deadpool, not noticing the awakening, slapped the prisoner's cheek again. And then…
"Aaaaaah!"
The stranger's hand burst from its wooden prison and clamped onto Deadpool's arm, literally tearing it out by the root. The legionaries screamed in horror, watching the fountain of blood.
"Whoa, now that's a prank, that's what I understa-a-a-and…"
Deadpool, maintaining his composure at the sight of his severed limb, suddenly felt his head being squeezed in a vise. The stranger's other hand burst out and wrapped around his skull.
"The-the Commander's been grabbed!"
"He's trapped!"
The next moment, Deadpool's head exploded like an empty tin can. Blood and brain matter splattered everywhere.
"He… he's alive!!"
Amidst the soldiers' screams, the man in the tree, with furiously burning red eyes, lunged forward, tearing through the restraints like splinters. His heavy feet touched the ground.
Looking at the legionaries flailing in panic, he slowly stretched his stiff neck.
"While Rome slept… looking at these pathetic tin soldiers, I see how far it has fallen."
"He-he's talking!!"
The man casually tossed Deadpool's body aside.
"Pilums! Prepare the pilums!!"
The legionaries surrounded him, raising their shields, and pelted him with spears.
"Did you really think you could defeat true Rome with mere toothpicks?!"
The man plunged his hand into the tree trunk and pulled out a crimson spear, shaped like a branch. With one swing, he deflected all the projectiles flying at him.
"Th-that's the spear!!"
"How dare you defile the empire's name by standing before true Rome?!"
He twirled the weapon twice and plunged it forcefully into the ground.
For all things lead to my spear.
"Magna Voluisse Magnum!!"
Countless branches erupted from the spearhead, instantly piercing the legionaries' bodies. Some were impaled on stakes, others were torn to shreds. Under the influence of the tree's magic, the survivors one by one began to transform into wooden dolls.
Leaving behind a multiplying army of puppets, the man headed for the main tree pillar.
He spread his arms wide and roared:
"RO-O-OMA!"
His fingers touched the edges of the wood.
"Awaken! True Rome! The host of Romulus!!"
With this thunderous call of Romulus, his loyal soldiers, trapped in the column, began to break free from their wooden shackles.
At that very instant, the column shuddered, collapsing its vaults, and began to grow rapidly, breaking through the foundation and soaring upwards through the imperial palace.
The colossal tree of Rome, Magna Voluisse Magnum, spread its mighty branches, ready to pierce the very sky.
"Only Rome is Rome! Everything else is also Rome, created by Rome! Oh, insignificant Rome! Bow before true Greatness! Hail, RO-O-OME!"
Assuming a majestic pose, Romulus ascended the wooden throne and led his army of wooden soldiers to conquer the empire, to erect Rome for the true Rome.
◇
Meanwhile, Ritsuka and Mash, with Cú Chulainn's support, managed to defeat Caesar, the emperor of Gallo-Rome. Soon, Queen Boudica appeared behind them, radiating bloodlust.
"Ha! A dirty British savage? What a shame… I hoped to fall at the hands of a worthy Roman emperor at least!"
Even in defeat, Caesar did not lose his composure. His words conveyed only contempt and mockery towards the "barbarians."
Boudica didn't even bat an eye. Only the thirst for revenge lived in her heart.
"Your Rome! My daughters were defiled and killed! Thousands of deaths will not atone for this sin!"
She drew her sword and pressed it to Caesar's throat. But he merely gave a wry smile.
"So what, savage? You'll still remain barbarians! How can underdeveloped savages understand the will of great Rome? Stupid barbarians… you live by Rome's will and die by Rome's hand! Know your place, girl!"
"A-a-a-a-a!!"
Boudica's hatred flared with renewed intensity. Caesar impassively accepted his fate.
"I have come. I kill. I take your life!!"
The Queen swung her sword. Her head rolled on the ground, but she continued to furiously strike the lifeless body. Rage and sorrow made her hack Caesar's corpse to pieces.
"Queen! Calm down. He's already dead!"
Only when Cú Chulainn intervened did her blade stop. Caesar's body turned to light and disappeared.
"Queen. There is one more Rome left. Nero's Rome…"
At these words, Boudica, radiating an even more terrifying death wish, exited the palace. She raised her blood-stained sword to the sky and cried out:
"That bitch Nero… I swear, I will personally take her head! I will dismember her and scatter the remains to the four corners of Britain so she may rot in filth forever!"
"My Queen, look there!"
While Boudica was spewing curses, the soldiers pointed beyond the horizon.
There stood a tree of unimaginable size. Despite the vast distance, it seemed colossal.
"Nero's capital is in that direction! What's happening there?!"
Cú Chulainn's eyes widened in astonishment.
"Senpai… maybe Pool-san…?"
Ritsuka swallowed and slowly nodded at Mash's question.
"Most likely, he's there."
Led by Boudica, driven solely by revenge, the Gallic resistance army marched towards Rome.
***
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