Seven years. I had been in this backwater dump for seven fucking years eating dog scraps for protein and gruel that tasted like liquified farts.
Currently I was in the middle of a workout, as always: doing handstand pushups, and yes I had progressed to this level through grueling hours of gritting my teeth and pushing till my arms became noodles.
"Three seventy-eight! Symmetry is truth! Three seventy-nine! Symmetry is truth! Three eigh—
"Wuque!!! Brat come here!" Dad shouted
"Fuck me—FOR WHAT PURPOSE DO YOU CALL UPON MY NAME" I shouted back
The man was getting older fast, and the disgusting form of his farm work, no matter how much I'd fixed before I was born had taken a toll on his body. So much so that the oldie would literally call me for anything, like how grandparents would call for a tv remote right beside them.
But well, me being the filial son I was decided to just go and not be a bitch ass son, only to find him sitting down with an expression that seemed worried, but resigned to fate.
"Wuque... sit down with me... it's finally time" He stated, seeming almost unwilling to say anything next.
"Son... it's time, FOR YOUR SEVENTH BIRTHDAY" He declared, suddenly jumping up.
Apparently from what I'd heard from the other villagers the man had become a lot more talkative since my birth, maybe because I'm just me or maybe as a coping mechanism. The heavens were impartial to him, when they gave him a life, they took one too.
He continued "And because it is your seventh birthday, it is time for your first hunt!" He articulated, almost glowing with joy
"Most gracious father I would like not to doubt your physcial prowess, but considering your physical state, are you positive that—"
"Wuque there is nothing to worry about, this one was quite the hunter in his days!" He laughed, pointing at himself. "And for heaven's sake would you talk normally! Why is your voice so deep for a seven year old? Is my Wuque sick?!" He approached inquisitively.
"Do not fear father it is not a matter you need to be concerned about. On the matter of the hunt, I have made my mind to accompany you in this endeavor"
'Yes! The speechmaxxing is working!' I cheered internally
"Wuque this is not important for me but for you, it will be a new chapter of your life! You can take on the business of huntin—"
"Father, no" I denied firmly, looking him dead in the eyes
"Unfilial son." He remarked in response
30 minutes later after some prepping, which included preparing some rope, taking out a bow that looked as brittle as glass and a few shoddy arrows, we headed out to the forest.
It was called the 'Forbidden forest by the villagers' and wasn't really forbidden by law, more by common sense. It was a dense, jagged stretch of forest where the trees grew too tall and the shadows felt too heavy. To the villagers, it was a place of ghosts. To me, it was an untapped pharmacy of high-density nutrients.
"Wuque, stay behind me," my father, Wei Bai, grunted. He was carrying a rusted hunting spear, his frame moving with a surprising, silent grace through the undergrowth. "We're just here for some deer, don't go off staring at yourself in the pond."
"I am merely observing the local flora for potential micronutrient optimization, Father," I rumbled, my voice now a permanent baritone thanks to my speechmaxxing drills. "Though I must admit, the atmospheric pressure in this sector suggests a higher concentration of... something."
Father ignored my vocabulary. He was used to his 'scholar-son' talking like a possessed magistrate.
"Look over there son, yes there. You are old enough to have to learn thi knowledge." He stated calmly. "Those are Blood-Grain Berries, used to invigorate blood. They can sell for a pretty penny at the village. Luckily these ones haven't been eaten yet."
'invigorated the blood.' In my terms? Natural EPO. A cardiovascular cheat code.
I moved toward them, my fingers already calculating the harvest, when the forest went dead silent.
The bushes across the clearing didn't just rustle; they exploded.
A big-ass deer ran out only to trip on the rope I had prepared, just in time for me to land a fatal blow on it's neck.
The bastard lay there dead, but I cared not for it's life, but it's meat no homo. The protein called out to me, years of shitty meat scraps had me salivating at the sight of this deer.
"Good job son, let's go home" I heard a voice call out above me.
It was my father crouching on a tree, how the fuck he got there, I don't know but he did. How did this man who looked frail get the fuck up there. I wanted to know, and if he was hiding any secrets, I was going to find out.
"Father how have you managed to make your way up that tree?" I asked, curious.
"Son I used my Qi. What else? For someone who has a lot of Qi at his age you really don't know how to use it? Oh wait, I forgot to teach you this. Well happy birthday son! Being 7 years old also means you will be able to now manipulate your Qi!" He exclaimed. "This isn't really the place to talk about this so let us make our way home first, then we'll talk about it" He called, walking away.
Wait... Qi? Qi?!?!?! I was reincarnated into a ching-chong cultivation world???