That morning, I woke up as usual at dawn, though my body still felt quite tired. A nurse brought me breakfast and medication. As I ate, my mind was filled with various thoughts. Yesterday, Tiger gave me a new phone. The first thing I did was call Mom to reassure her that I was okay. Then, I contacted the office, informing them that I had suddenly fallen ill and requested extended leave. Although they were not happy about it, my request was eventually approved.
Last night, I also spoke with Nao. He asked what I wanted as a get-well gift. I requested some fruit and two bouquets of flowers. The type of flowers didn't matter, as long as they were brightly colored. My thoughts scattered when I heard a knock on the door. It was Tiger and Nao—the very people I had been thinking about.
"Good morning," I greeted them with a smile. They responded with the same greeting. Nao sat in the chair beside my bed.
"How's breakfast?" Nao asked.
"It's good. Want to try?" I offered.
"Who would want to eat hospital food?" Nao scoffed, waving his hand. "Here are the fruits and flowers. You ordered two bouquets because one is for him, right?"
"Yes," I nodded.
"Nao, do you want to know about the person who helped me?"
"Of course," Nao replied while placing the fruit on the tray and arranging the colorful roses in a vase. "Tell me everything."
"How about we meet him first, and then I'll tell you?" I suggested.
"Either way is fine," Nao replied casually. "I have to thank him. Tiger didn't do it yesterday."
"Yeah," I turned to Tiger, who was sitting on the sofa, looking obviously annoyed.
"Tiger, do you not want Nao to meet him?"
"Absolutely not," Tiger sighed heavily.
"Why?" Nao asked, confused. "First, I wasn't allowed to know what happened and had to wait for Dan to tell me. Now, I can't even see him? At first, I tried not to think about it, but now I'm really curious! Dan, tell me."
I finally decided to tell Nao everything about Jayden. After yesterday's events, I realized that Jayden might be with me for a while, so Nao needed to know about him. Besides, Nao wasn't the type to judge easily—he was more empathetic.
"Ah..." Nao's tone softened as he folded his arms, thinking. "Wow, I don't know what to say. But Dan, you said you would take care of him, right?"
"Yes."
"As what?"
"I want him to have the chance to be a normal eighteen-year-old," I said sincerely. "Even though he doesn't know what he wants, everything has been taken from him—even his thoughts and emotions. He can choose to live or die, but I want him to choose life. There are so many things in this world he can discover. One day, maybe he'll find something that makes him want to live."
"You're going to help him find that?"
I nodded.
Tiger interjected, "Yesterday, you said you would be Jayden's reason to live, didn't you?"
Nao looked at me. "Is that true?"
"Yes. At the very least, he has me as a reason. He knows that there's someone who wants him to live. And in the future, I hope he finds hundreds of reasons to keep wanting to live."
"Dan, you're incredible," Nao looked at me in admiration. "So cool."
"Thank you."
"Now, can we see him?"
"Tiger doesn't want you to,"
Nao said quietly. "At the very least, I should say thank you. He saved Dan."
"Alright."
Tiger led us to Jayden's room. There were four guards stationed there. Jayden was staring out the window, not turning toward us. I carried a bouquet of roses and a bag of fruit, placing them on the chair beside his bed. Tiger ordered the guards to leave the room.
"Good morning, Jay."
"Dan."
I smiled as he remembered our agreement from yesterday.
"This is Nao, my twin brother," I introduced him.
Nao then introduced himself cheerfully. "Hello, my name is Nao. You're Jayden, right? Thank you so much for helping Dan. You're amazing for fighting off those people alone and getting him out of there. And your survival skills on that island are incredible. You're so cool!" Nao praised him, giving a thumbs-up.
"I can do all that and more," Tiger muttered, looking annoyed.
"Yeah, yeah."
"I brought something for you," I said, lifting the bag in my hand. "I asked Nao to bring them. This room is so white, so I thought brightly colored flowers would brighten the atmosphere." I placed the fruit on the tray but noticed the vase that was supposed to be beside it was missing. "Where's the vase?"
"They're replacing it," Tiger said. Not long after, the door opened, and someone brought in a new vase. "Perfect timing," Tiger commented, carrying the new transparent plastic vase. I immediately understood why they replaced it. Ceramic vases in hospital rooms could be broken and used as weapons.
It wasn't because they were afraid Jayden would hurt himself, but because he might use it as a weapon.
"Why did they replace it with plastic?" Nao asked innocently.
I smiled at him. "Because clear plastic looks nicer."
"Ah, yes, this is prettier than the vase in Dan's room," Nao nodded quickly, seeming convinced. Upon closer inspection, I noticed that several items in the room had been replaced.
"I didn't know what kind of flowers you like, so I brought roses. This was the prettiest bouquet in the shop."
"Bright-colored roses are beautiful. Do you like flowers?" I asked.
As expected, Jayden didn't answer. But then, he did something unexpected—he picked up a red rose and held it, staring at it silently.
"You like red roses?" I smiled. "Next time, I'll only bring red ones. Jay."
"Yes."
"What does 'yes' mean? You like them? If you don't tell me, next time, I'll bring different flowers."
"Anything is fine," Jayden answered quietly, his eyes still fixed on the red rose.
"But you prefer red roses?"
He nodded.
"Ah," something crossed my mind. "Do you know what 'liking' means?"
He shook his head.
"Like the red rose in your hand," I pointed at him, taking a white rose from the vase.
"Which one do you choose?"
"The red rose."
"That means you prefer red roses," I smiled. "If you had to choose between white and red?"
"The red rose."
"And between red and other colors, like blue or yellow?"
"The red rose."
"That means you like the color red," I explained. "It's hard to describe 'liking' something, but that's how it works. Have you ever eaten an orange?" I pulled an orange from my pocket. "Have you tried one before?"
He nodded. I handed him the orange.
"Try one."
He peeled the orange and ate a slice.
"How does it taste?"
"...It's an orange."
"Hahaha," I couldn't hold back my laughter at his honest response. I gave him two more. "Do you want more? But you have to finish them all."
He nodded.
"This isn't an order, it's a question. If you don't want to, you can say no."
"No."
"Is it too sour?"
"Yes."
"So, you don't like oranges that are too sour. But maybe you should try different kinds of oranges to find out which ones you like."
"If I want something, does that mean I like it?"
"Sort of," I answered. "You have to know what you like and what you don't. To figure that out, you need to try many things. This doesn't just affect your daily life, but also your career or what you'll do in the future. Right now, you're under my protection, you know that?"
"Yes."
"I don't want to force you. I want you to choose whether you want to be with me. But for now, you have to be under Tiger's supervision," I started explaining. "I've promised Tiger and Leon that I'll be responsible for you, so for now, you have to stay with me. But in the future..."
"In the future, when you choose your own path and Tiger sees that you're not a threat, you'll be able to live however you want."
"However you want to live, I'll fully support you. You just have to truly want it. Do you know how you want to live?"
He shook his head.
"Alright, then let's try a normal life."
"What's that like?"
"At your age, eighteen, it's the end of high school and the beginning of college. You might like studying, joining an academy, music, sports, or anything else. I'll help you figure out what you like. We'll grow together. Okay?"
"Yes, anything is fine."
"Alright," I grinned. "Like I said, to know if you like something, you have to try it. You might get tired, but I'll take you to experience everything. First, recover. I live in Thailand. Do you speak Thai because you lived there, visited, or just learned it?"
"I lived there."
"Good. We'll go back to Thailand soon," I said. "My work leave isn't long. If your condition improves, I'll take you there to recover."
"Yes."
We talked a little more before leaving Jay to rest. The three of us returned to the room. I felt relieved after explaining my intentions.
"Dan,"
"Hmm?"
"It's like taking care of a child."
"Yeah," I nodded. "It's like having a child again. Oh, Nao and Tiger, you're not returning that soon, right?"
"We want to go back soon," Nao said. "Are you coming back with us?"
"Yes," I replied. "I'll continue my recovery in Thailand. I miss Fai and Mom. Ah, Tiger."
"Yeah?"
"About the supervision, how will that work?"
"There will be someone watching him at all times."
"Can we be alone?"
"Absolutely not," Tiger said, frowning. "Why do you want to be alone with him?"
"Like I told Nao, taking care of Jay is like taking care of a child. If someone is always watching him, it's like saying I don't trust him. How can he open up or trust me?"
"He can't be trusted."
"I need you to trust me, Tiger," I said seriously. "Otherwise, it'll be hard to teach him or talk to him."
"I understand," Tiger said. "But you also have to understand our perspective. Jayden in your eyes and in ours is not the same."
"I know," I sighed.
"We have to find a middle ground," Nao said thoughtfully. "Dan, you don't want him being watched all the time, right?"
"Yeah, more or less."
"What if Jayden tries to hurt you? I understand you trust him, but we don't."
I nodded. "Then what do you suggest, Nao?"
"Dan should learn self-defense."
"Hmm?"
"Think about it. If Tiger is alone with Jayden, who cares? So Dan should train to be as good as or better than Tiger."
"That would take a long time," I said. "But I do think learning self-defense is a good idea. After this kidnapping, I'll definitely do it."
"Then how about this?" Nao thought again. "Ah, I know."
"What?"
"If we do this," Nao explained his idea. I was a bit surprised. "Is this allowed, Tiger?"
Tiger frowned. "It's acceptable."
"Dan, what do you think?"
"Yeah, but is it necessary to go that far?"
"If not, there's no other way. If Jayden does nothing to you, nothing will happen, right? That's trust."
I nodded, though not completely convinced. But there was no other choice. We had to find a middle ground between Tiger's extreme view and mine. Nao's idea seemed like the best solution. After talking a bit longer, the two of them left so I could rest.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
In my free time, I started writing a journal about Jayden—things I wanted to try with him, what I wanted to teach him. It felt like a father planning his child's future. While writing, I got a call from Nao.
[Hey, Dan, do you want anything special for dinner? We're coming over tonight.]
"Where are you now?"
[At xx.]
"Hahaha, are you guys on a date?" I joked. "Anything is fine. Oh, and get something for Jay too."
[Alright, I'll get two.]
"Great."
[Hey, Dan, I wanted to ask you something earlier, but I forgot.]
"What is it?"
[Why did you ask Jayden to call you Dan instead of Phi Dan?]
"Ah, that," I paused for a moment. "Because he doesn't know what a friend is, so I figured he wouldn't know what Phi means either. To him, relationships are just about following orders from superiors. So, when he understands what Phi means and respects me that way, then he can call me Phi Dan."
[But you call yourself Phi.]
"It's a habit. With younger people I want to be close to, I call myself Phi."
[Ah, I see. See you later.]
"See you."
After hanging up, I reflected on it. I had always been proud to be a Phi, an older brother. Having another younger brother would be nice. I wrote another goal in my journal:
'Make Jay see me as his older brother.'
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
A few days passed, and Nao's idea materialized into two elegant black wristwatches. Mine looked like an ordinary watch, but it had a button that only I could press. There was no risk of it being pressed accidentally. Pressing the button would send a signal to Jay's watch, releasing a tranquilizer needle. The effect was almost instantaneous. If Jay tried to hurt me, all I had to do was press the button to incapacitate him.
"We haven't tested if it will actually knock him out," Tiger said seriously. "The dosage is calculated for an average person, but Jayden is more resistant to many things."
"He's human," I replied.
"A tranquilizer dart would be better."
"Hhaaha," Nao tried to stifle his laughter.
"What's funny, Nao?"
"Tiger mentioned a tranquilizer dart, and I imagined Dan shooting an arrow at Jayden. It's hilarious," Nao said. "We should have used a stun device instead. If he tries anything, Dan could just electrocute him repeatedly."
"That would kill him."
"If he tries to hurt Dan, he deserves it."
"Alright, the tranquilizer is enough."
"Yeah, and the watch also has a heart rate monitor and GPS. If Dan's heart rate spikes, someone will call. If Dan doesn't respond within five seconds, Jayden will be sedated. This is in case Dan is tied up or needs help and can't press the button."
"Ah, the heart rate increases due to fear, right?"
Nao nodded. "Even if the heart stops. So Jayden can't just cut off Dan's hand."
"He can't kill him immediately," Tiger added. "If he tries to remove the watch, he'll be sedated as well."
"...Alright."
"But Dan will still be monitored at all times. There will be no surveillance only when he is alone in a room with Jayden, because Dan insisted. So be very careful. Always keep an eye on him. The most important thing is the watch. And they can't be alone for more than thirty minutes."
"So, will you increase the time if it feels safe?" I smiled and asked.
"If it feels safe."
"Yes, something like that."
Nao fastened the first watch on my wrist before we went to see Jay together. Over the past few days, I had been visiting Jay regularly, but there were always at least four people watching us, and I was only allowed thirty minutes a day. I used those thirty minutes to try talking to him about various things, but Jay rarely responded, so it felt more like I was talking to myself.
"Jay, good morning," I said as I sat in my usual spot. "I brought you more red roses today."
I looked in the direction he was gazing. Jay was still holding onto the red rose I had given him before, even though it had already withered. I wasn't sure if it was just my imagination, but he seemed sad looking at the wilted flower.
"Jay, I brought new flowers to replace the old ones."
He slowly turned and took the bouquet of red roses, hugging them.
"Flowers, once cut from their plant, will eventually wither. That's natural," I said. "You don't like it when they wither?"
He nodded again.
"Alright, I have something for you today," I lifted the black watch so he could see it.
"First, I need to explain how this watch works and why we made it. If you're uncomfortable with it, that's okay. Just be honest. You don't have to wear it if you don't want to," I said seriously. "But I think it would be nice if we could spend time together."
Jay reached out his hand. Without realizing it, I smiled and fastened the watch onto his wrist.
"Thank you for agreeing," I said. "I trust you. This watch— we'll never have to use it, right?"
"Hmm."