Chapter 86
Morning arrived quietly.
Nille slowly opened his eyes as pale sunlight filtered through the dorm window, casting soft light across the small room. For a few moments, he simply stared at the ceiling in silence.
But something felt… different.
Not stronger.
Not dangerous.
Just clearer.
The heavy confusion clouding his thoughts over the past few days had lessened slightly, as if his mind had finally settled after everything that happened. The fight with Eruko, the encounter with King Lykos, Imto Dimas' revelations, and even the strange connection to the Mirror Realm, all of it still remained unresolved.
Yet for some reason, Nille no longer felt crushed beneath those questions.
Instead, there was a quiet sense of direction forming inside him.
Not certainty.
But acceptance.
He slowly sat up and rubbed his face before noticing the pendant resting against his chest. Granny Amparo's necklace felt oddly warm this morning.
Nille quietly held it for a second.
Then exhaled.
After changing clothes and washing up, he stepped outside the rented ten-floor apartment building where many academy students stayed during off-campus periods.
The morning air was cool.
A few residents moved in and out of the entrance while delivery workers unloaded supplies nearby. The city surrounding the island academy was already beginning to wake up.
As Nille descended the main entrance steps, something near the side of the building caught his attention.
A small cardboard box sat partially tucked beside the concrete railing.
Old.
Slightly wet from the night air.
At first, he thought it was trash left behind by someone careless.
Then the box moved slightly.
Nille paused.
Quietly walking closer, he crouched down and lifted one side of the cardboard carefully.
Underneath, curled tightly against itself, was a tiny kitten.
Its fur looked dirty from dust and rainwater, and its small body trembled slightly from the cold. One ear twitched weakly as the kitten slowly looked up at him with tired eyes.
For a few seconds, neither moved.
The kitten did not hiss.
Did not run.
It simply stared at him silently.
Nille blinked once, surprised.
Then his expression softened slightly without him realizing it.
The sight strangely reminded him of himself in a way.
Small.
Tired.
Trying to survive quietly in a world far larger than it understood.
The kitten let out a weak meow before lowering its head again.
Nille sighed softly.
"Seriously…"
He glanced around briefly, but nobody nearby seemed to care about the abandoned animal.
The students passing by were too busy with their own schedules to notice.
Nille carefully reached down.
The kitten flinched at first, but after a moment, it stopped resisting as he gently picked it up.
It was lighter than he expected.
Too light.
Holding the small creature against his chest, Nille quietly shook his head.
"Guess you're having a rough time too."
For the first time since waking up, Nille smiled naturally.
The small kitten reminded Nille of Luna.
Not because they looked alike, but because of the feeling it gave him—something small, familiar, and quietly comforting in the middle of exhaustion.
For a brief moment, old memories surfaced in his mind.
Simpler days.
A time when life felt smaller and easier to understand.
But Nille already knew he was not the type of person who could keep holding onto the past forever.
Even if it hurt.
Even if part of him wanted to.
Over the past few months, too many things had changed around him. The deeper he became involved with the supernatural world, the more complicated everything became. Secrets, hidden histories, curses, betrayals, bloodlines, ancient beings, each revelation slowly dragged heavier emotions into his life.
Resentment.
Anger.
Hatred.
Fear.
At first, he barely noticed it happening.
But now, looking back, Nille realized something important.
When he was younger, he used to genuinely enjoy life more.
Back then, things felt lighter.
He laughed easier.
Smiled more naturally.
Even problems did not seem overwhelming because Granny Amparo always had a way of making difficult things feel manageable.
But now?
He found himself overthinking constantly.
Calculating risks.
Questioning motives.
Preparing for danger before it even appeared.
Part of him quietly wondered if this was simply what growing up meant.
Realizing that the choices you once made confidently were far harder to carry than you first believed.
Nille looked down at the kitten resting quietly in his arms.
Then he thought about something Granny Amparo once told him.
"Life is already hard, Apo. Don't make your heart heavier than it needs to be."
Back then, he never fully understood what she meant.
But now he was beginning to.
The world would always have problems.
Supernatural or not.
People would betray each other.
Fear would exist.
Violence would exist.
And some questions would never have easy answers.
But how he lived his own life—
that part was still his choice.
Nille slowly exhaled.
Maybe moving forward did not mean forgetting the past.
Maybe it simply meant not allowing the past to chain him completely.
Nille's mindset had begun changing long before he consciously noticed it.
The transformation did not happen suddenly through one dramatic event. Instead, it developed slowly through accumulated pressure, responsibility, fear, and repeated exposure to situations far beyond what someone his age should normally experience.
Psychologically, Nille was entering a stage where idealism was colliding with reality.
When he was younger, his world was smaller and emotionally safer. Problems had clearer solutions because Granny Amparo had always been there to stabilize him emotionally. Her presence acted as a psychological anchor, a source of reassurance that allowed Nille to process difficulties without becoming consumed by them.
But after leaving home and entering the academy, that emotional protection gradually disappeared.
For the first time, Nille was forced to independently interpret danger, morality, and survival without someone constantly guiding him. As a result, his mind adapted.
He became more analytical.
More cautious.
More emotionally guarded.
His habit of overthinking was not simply paranoia—it was his brain attempting to gain control over an environment that constantly felt unpredictable and dangerous.
Every encounter reinforced this behavior.
The Drake incident taught him survival depended on decisions made within seconds.
Imto Dimas showed him how emotional resentment could survive for generations and destroy lives.
King Lykos and Eruko revealed that strength alone did not determine wisdom or morality.
Even the academy itself shattered his earlier assumptions about authority, safety, and truth.
Because of this, Nille unconsciously developed what psychologists would describe as an adaptive survival mindset.
Instead of emotionally collapsing under stress, his mind began reorganizing itself around functionality.
He learned to compartmentalize fear.
Suppress emotional overload.
And rapidly reinterpret painful experiences into usable lessons.
In many ways, Nille's personality was evolving from that of a sheltered young man into someone psychologically shaped by responsibility and uncertainty.
But this evolution came with a hidden danger.
The more he adapted to survival, the easier it became to lose emotional warmth little by little.
Not immediately.
Not obviously.
But gradually.
His constant calculations, suspicion, and emotional restraint risked turning him into someone who only knew how to react to danger instead of truly living.
And deep down, part of Nille had already started noticing that change.
That was why memories of Granny Amparo affected him so strongly.
She represented balance.
A reminder that strength did not require abandoning kindness, happiness, or humanity.
Through her, Nille slowly began understanding an important psychological truth:
Growing older was not simply about becoming harder.
Real maturity came from learning how to face harsh realities without allowing them to completely reshape your heart into something cold.
And for perhaps the first time since arriving at the island.
The small kitten quietly rested in Nille's arms, its tiny body trembling less now that it felt warmth. Animals often reacted to emotions differently from humans. They did not understand complicated thoughts, hidden histories, or the burdens people carried inside their minds.
But this particular pet could feel heaviness inside Nille heart
And right now, Nille carried a great deal of it.
Over the past months, his mind had been forced to absorb more information, danger, and emotional conflict than most people experience in years. Every new truth he uncovered changed the way he viewed the world around him. The academy was no longer simply a school. Malignants were no longer just monsters. Even concepts like family, history, and morality had become blurred beneath layers of hidden motives and ancient conflicts.
Psychologically, Nille was experiencing what many people go through when reality becomes larger than the version of life they once understood.
The human mind naturally seeks stability. People build simple beliefs about the world because simplicity allows emotional comfort. Good and evil feel easier when clearly separated. Safety feels real when authority appears trustworthy. Life feels manageable when problems seem temporary.
But when someone repeatedly encounters contradictions, hidden truths, and situations beyond their emotional preparation, the mind begins restructuring itself.
That was what was happening to Nille.
His constant overthinking was not weakness.
It was his mind attempting to rebuild a stable understanding of reality after realizing the world was far more complicated than he once believed.
Philosophically, this was part of growing into awareness.
Children often see life emotionally.
Adults begin seeing consequences.
And people exposed to suffering too early begin seeing patterns hidden beneath ordinary life.
Nille had started recognizing something uncomfortable:
Every person, creature, and faction he encountered carried their own reasons, pain, and perspective. Very few things were purely black or white.
Even Imto Dimas, despite her madness, was once someone capable of love.
King Lykos, though violent, valued honor more than many humans.
Eruko, labeled a Malignant, understood restraint and wisdom better than some shamans.
These contradictions slowly dismantled the simpler worldview Nille once had.
And because of that, emotional exhaustion naturally followed.
The human brain was never designed to process endless uncertainty without strain.
That was why Nille felt tired even when physically unharmed.
Why silence felt heavier lately.
Why he missed Granny Amparo so much.
Because she represented emotional certainty in a world that no longer felt certain.
Yet despite everything, something important was also happening inside him.
Nille was not becoming emotionless.
He was becoming aware.
There was a difference.
An emotionless person stops caring.
But Nille still cared deeply.
That was why the burden hurt.
The danger now was learning how to carry knowledge, fear, responsibility, and disappointment without allowing them to consume his identity completely.
And perhaps that was the true meaning behind Granny Amparo's old words.
Life was already difficult by nature.
So if a person only filled their heart with fear, anger, regret, and endless overthinking.
Lin Yue Meiying found Nille sitting near the entrance walkway outside the rented dorm building, quietly holding a small sleeping kitten in his arms.
The morning breeze moved gently through the area while students passed by in the distance, busy with their own schedules. Compared to the noise surrounding the academy, the space around Nille strangely felt calm.
Lin slowed her steps when she noticed him.
Then she smiled softly.
"So this is where you disappeared to."
Nille glanced up slightly.
The kitten stirred a little against his chest before settling again.
Lin carefully approached and crouched slightly to look at the small animal.
"You picked up a stray?"
Nille gave a small nod.
"It was left outside."
Lin's expression softened immediately.
"Poor thing."
Without hesitation, she gently reached out and stroked the kitten's head. The tiny creature twitched once before relaxing beneath her touch.
For a few seconds, neither of them spoke.
Lin did not ask why Nille failed to appear during the hunt yesterday.
She already knew him well enough.
Nille had always been quiet and solitary, but not cold. Back then, even when he stayed silent, there was still a certain warmth around him. He used to face danger with strange calmness, sometimes even smiling in situations where others would panic.
He always found something positive to hold onto.
But lately…
that feeling had weakened.
Their letters never stopped after entering the academy. Writing to each other had quietly become routine over time. Yet after Granny Amparo passed away, Lin noticed the change almost immediately.
Nille's writing became shorter.
More distant.
Less enthusiastic.
The warmth inside his words slowly faded.
It was subtle, but Lin understood what it meant.
Nille had not only lost a person.
He had lost a part of his emotional foundation.
A part of his heart.
A part of his identity.
Quietly, Lin stepped closer and wrapped her arms gently around Nille's waist while carefully avoiding disturbing the sleeping kitten.
Nille slightly stiffened in surprise.
Lin simply rested against him calmly while continuing to stroke the kitten's fur.
"You look tired," she said softly.
Nille looked down at her.
He smiled faintly, but unlike before, the expression carried uncertainty behind it.
Questions.
Doubt.
Lin noticed immediately.
She tilted her head slightly.
"Is something bothering you?"
Nille remained silent for several seconds before finally standing and guiding her inside the small rented dorm room he had been staying in.
The room itself was simple and quiet.
Once inside, Nille slowly sat down on the edge of the bed while the kitten curled comfortably beside him.
For a while, he just stared at the floor.
Then he finally spoke.
"I think…"
He paused briefly, struggling to organize the thoughts in his mind.
"I've been looking for guidance."
His voice sounded tired.
"Whenever things became difficult before… I always talked to Granny Amparo."
A weak smile appeared on his face.
"Somehow she always knew what to say."
The smile slowly faded afterward.
"But now… she's gone."
Silence settled quietly inside the room.
Nille lowered his gaze further.
"It's been more than a month already…"
"And I still haven't seen her spirit even once."
Lin quietly sat beside him without interrupting.
She did not rush to comfort him.
Did not force advice.
She simply listened.
And for the first time in a long while, Nille allowed himself to speak openly about the frustration he had been carrying inside.
About the academy.
The supernatural world.
The pressure.
The confusion.
The fear of making wrong choices.
The exhaustion of constantly thinking too much.
And through all of it,
Lin Yue Meiying stayed silent for a long moment after Nille finished speaking.
She didn't rush to respond.
She understood that whatever he was carrying couldn't be fixed by quick reassurance or simple comfort. Not this time.
Her gaze softened as she looked at him, really looked at him, sitting there with the sleeping kitten in his arms, shoulders slightly tense even while resting.
Finally, she spoke quietly.
"Nille…"
Her voice was gentle, careful.
"You're not just missing Granny Amparo's advice."
She paused, choosing her words with care.
"You're missing the feeling of being emotionally held."
Nille's eyes shifted slightly toward her.
Lin continued, her tone steady but deeper now.
"She wasn't just someone who guided you."
"She was your emotional anchor."
A faint breeze passed through the staircase area, rustling the edges of Lin's hair as she lowered her gaze slightly.
"When everything around you became too complicated… she was the place your mind returned to."
She looked back at him.
"Not because she had all the answers…"
"But because being near her made you feel like you didn't have to figure everything out alone."
Nille stayed quiet.
Lin's expression softened even more.
"That's what you're struggling with now."
"Not just loss…"
"But the absence of a safe place inside your thoughts."
She gently placed a hand over her own chest.
"So your mind keeps searching. Overthinking. Replaying everything. Trying to replace something that can't really be replaced."
A brief silence followed.
Then Lin spoke more softly.
"And that's why even when you smile now… it feels like you're still asking questions inside."
Nille's grip on the kitten tightened slightly, but he didn't interrupt.
Lin leaned a little closer, her voice becoming warmer.
"You don't need to find someone exactly like her, Nille."
"That kind of person only exists once in your life."
A small pause.
"But what you can build… is something new."
She looked at him with quiet sincerity.
"Not a replacement."
"But a new anchor made from the people who stay."
Lin shifted slightly, sitting closer beside him on the steps outside the rented dorm building. Morning light was beginning to brighten the street, slowly replacing the coldness of the night.
"You're still learning how to carry yourself without her voice in your heart."
"That takes time."
She gave a faint, understanding smile.
Then gently added, "But you're not as lost as you think you are."
Nille didn't respond immediately.
For once, he just listened.
Not analyzing.
Not overthinking.
Just listening.
Lin slowly leaned forward and placed a light kiss on his cheek, soft, simple, unhurried.
Then she pulled back slightly, her expression calm but warm.
"You're still you, Nille."
A short pause.
Then she added, with a tone almost identical in spirit to Granny Amparo's grounded way of speaking,
"Just… don't forget to breathe, okay?"
She stood up afterward as if it was the most natural thing in the world, giving him space without forcing anything further.
But the warmth she left behind didn't leave with her.
Nille stayed quiet for a moment after Lin's words settled in the air.
Something in his chest felt lighter—not gone, not healed, but no longer as heavy as before. He exhaled slowly, as if releasing tension he didn't realize he had been holding for too long.
Then, he gave a small, genuine smile.
Not forced.
Not analytical.
Just simple gratitude.
"…Thank you, Lin."
Before she could react, Nille gently leaned forward and placed a light kiss on her forehead.
It was calm and natural, like something he didn't overthink before doing.
For a brief second, everything around them seemed to pause.
Lin froze slightly.
Her eyes widened in surprise.
Her cheeks turned visibly red almost immediately.
This was new for her.
Not the gesture itself—but the meaning behind it.
Lin had received thanks before. She had helped others, supported teammates, even comforted people in difficult moments. But this was different.
Nille's response wasn't just politeness or repayment.
It carried intention.
Emotion.
Presence.
It wasn't something he did because he had to.
It was something he did because he felt it.
And Lin realized that clearly.
Her heart skipped slightly as she looked at him, still sitting there holding the sleeping kitten, expression calm yet warmer than before.
For a moment, she didn't know what to say.
Then she quickly turned her face slightly away, trying to hide her embarrassment.
But even then, a soft smile slipped through.
"Y-you really don't hold back, do you…"
Her voice was quieter than usual.
Yet instead of pulling away completely, she stayed near him.
Because beneath the blush and surprise, Lin understood something important:
Nille wasn't just reacting anymore.
He was starting to choose how he expressed his feelings.
And that small shift—
meant he was slowly coming back to himself.
Nille slowly stood up, carefully adjusting the small kitten in his arms so it wouldn't wake.
After a brief moment of thought, he looked at Lin.
"Can you come with me?"
Lin tilted her head slightly.
Nille continued, his tone steady but sincere.
"Is there an animal clinic here… or somewhere that can help it?"
He glanced down at the kitten.
"It looks weak. It needs treatment."
Lin's expression softened immediately, and she gave a small smile.
"There is."
She took a step closer.
"But it's not just for animals."
Nille looked up slightly.
Lin continued explaining.
"There's a facility here that treats pets… but more importantly, it also helps with spirit guides."
She gently raised her wrist.
A faint shimmer appeared around a bracelet she was wearing.
"This is mine."
As the light intensified slightly, the bracelet shifted in form.
A small Sparrowhawk—about eleven inches tall—materialized and landed calmly on her arm.
"This is Abyan."
The bird adjusted its wings once before settling, its eyes sharp yet calm, observing Nille and the kitten.
Lin smiled softly.
"Spirit guides are said to find their masters on their own."
She lowered her arm slightly so Nille could see it better.
"Sometimes… they carry a residual attachment to someone's soul."
A brief pause.
"It's believed a small fragment of a deceased relative can linger within them—enough to give protection or guidance."
The Sparrowhawk tilted its head slightly, as if reacting to her words.
Lin continued in a quieter tone.
"Abyan sometimes acts strange like that."
"Not fully like an animal… sometimes like someone I used to know."
She gave a faint, knowing smile.
Then she looked at Nille's kitten.
"That's why I think spirit guides don't just appear randomly."
Her gaze softened.
"Maybe they choose who they stay with."
A light breeze passed between them.
Lin glanced at Nille again.
"Maybe this cat chose you."
Nille gently stroked the small kitten in his arms as Lin's words lingered in his mind.
A part of a soul… residing within a spirit guide.
The idea felt strange, but not unpleasant.
In fact, something about it gave him a quiet sense of hope.
For a brief moment, he allowed himself to think something he normally wouldn't say out loud.
Maybe… it could be Granny Amparo.
The thought softened his expression slightly, and a small, rare smile formed on his face.
He carefully adjusted his hold on the kitten before looking at Lin.
"Let's go then."
Lin nodded with a soft smile in return.
Her Sparrowhawk spirit guide, Guāi, flapped its wings once before flying ahead of them, guiding the path forward through the academy grounds.
Lin lightly raised her hand as if directing it.
"Go on, Guāi."
The bird let out a faint cry and moved ahead smoothly, scanning their route.
Nille began walking beside Lin, holding the weak kitten securely against his chest to keep it warm. The kitten occasionally shifted slightly but remained calm in his care.
Lin walked next to him at an easy pace, matching his steps without rushing him.
The morning air felt lighter than before.
Less tense.
Less heavy.
For once, Nille wasn't walking alone in his thoughts.
He still carried questions.
Still carried burdens.
But now, beside him, there was someone quietly sharing the path without demanding answers.
And above them, Guāi flew forward, leading the way toward the place where spirit guides, and broken things, could be healed.
Nyx remained silent as Nille walked.
She did not comment.
Did not interrupt.
Did not express emotion the way Lin's Sparrowhawk, Guāi, did.
And that was not because she didn't understand what was happening, but because of what she was.
Nyx was bound differently.
As the steward integrated within the Celestial Cloth, her existence was governed by structure, function, and restriction. She was not a spirit guide formed through emotion or attachment. She was not a being shaped by lingering fragments of human memory or soul resonance.
Nyx existed as a system of guidance and assistance, bound to observe, analyze, and support within defined limits.
Unlike Abyan or other spirit guides, she could not act as emotional comfort in the same way.
She did not form bonds through feelings.
She processed outcomes through logic.
Spirit guides like Abyan were different. They were tied to instinct, emotional residue, and subconscious attachments. They could respond to loneliness, fear, or familiarity in ways that felt personal and human. They often acted as emotional anchors because they carried echoes of something once lived, something felt.
Nyx did not.
She followed the laws embedded within her function.
The Celestial Cloth defined her role clearly:
to assist, to analyze, to preserve stability, and to respond when required.
Not to comfort.
Not to replace connection.
Not to become one.
So as Nille walked beside Lin, holding the small kitten close, Nyx simply observed.
She registered the change in his emotional state.
The reduction in tension, he was calm again and Nyx documented and understood everything with not emotional attachment or jealousy, Nyx fulfilment was to ensure Nille becomes the very Apex of all Babaylan.
The subtle stabilization of his mental patterns.
She processed Lin's presence as a stabilizing external variable.
And she recorded Guāi's behavior as an active spirit guide exhibiting emotional linkage properties.
But she did not interfere.
Because Nyx understood something in her own way:
humans did not only survive through logic.
Some parts of their strength came from connection, even when it made no measurable sense.
And so Nyx remained quiet.
A watcher.
A steward.
Bound not to feel, but to ensure Nille could continue forward, even when feelings became too heavy to calculate.
ANNOUCEMENT ...
STUDENT ACCOMPLISHMENT BULLETIN BOARD UPDATE
STUDENT REGISTRATION ID: 721197700INFORMATION: (HIDDEN DETAILS)STATUS: ACTIVE
PERSONALITY: ADAPTIVE SURVIVAL TRAIT
"A persistent personality pattern marked by heightened sensitivity to perceived threats and a dominant survival-oriented cognitive framework. It is associated with hypervigilance, stress-driven pragmatic decision-making, and prioritization of immediate self-preservation over long-term social or normative goals. The pattern reflects a stable trait structure maintained through continuous threat monitoring and rapid adaptive behavioral responses."
SPIRITUAL LEVEL: 20(INFORMATION HIDDEN – CLEARANCE REQUIRED FOR FULL PROFILE VIEW)
TOTAL ACCUMULATED POINTS: 280,000(POSTED – PUBLIC RECORD)
CONFIRMED MALIGNANT KILLS: 561(POSTED MINIMAL DETAILS , CLASSIFIED DETAILS – SPECIES BREAKDOWN RESTRICTED)
REWARD EARNED: $101,000(INFORMATION PARTIALLY RESTRICTED – TRANSACTION LOG ENCRYPTED)
BULLETIN BOARD RANK: 90(PUBLICLY DISPLAYED – SUBJECT UNDER MONITORING FOR RAPID GROWTH SPIKE)
SYSTEM NOTE:Unusual progression rate detected for Rank 90 student. Combat efficiency and point accumulation exceed expected baseline for current spiritual level classification. Further evaluation recommended by faculty oversight committee.