Jake and Alan directed the cab driver to the coordinates matching the Unit 44 truck, arriving just as the sun was beginning to threaten the Vegas horizon.
As they stepped through the chain-link gates of the Neon Graveyard, it looked exactly like a cemetery for forgotten Vegas glory.
It was a massive, dusty expanse filled with the hulking, rusted corpses of old casino signs. There were giant, cracked martini glasses, unlit golden nuggets the size of minivans, and faded, fifty-foot showgirl legs leaning against the fences.
But tucked away in the back lot, they found the Look-Alike Parade.
This was where the "Unit 44" trucks had been dropping off tourists and locals who had been "processed" at the various hotels for an underground, end-of-the-night desert party.
Jake looked around and instantly realized what had happened.
"Uncle Charlie didn't just pick Elvis," Jake explained to his father, his eyes scanning the crowd of costumed stragglers. "He picked the Vegas Elvis. And you didn't just buy a random red dress at the gift shop; you were dressed as 'The Lady in Red' from the old Flamingo show. This entire graveyard is a stage, and that barcode they stamped on you was your ticket to get in before the sun came up."
Alan clutched his hotel bathrobe tightly around his sequined dress. "I was a VIP guest at an illegal desert rave?"
"More like a prop, Dad," Jake corrected.
They finally found Charlie passed out in the center of the lot, completely dwarfed beneath a giant, unlit cowboy sign.
He was snoring peacefully in a shimmering, gold lamé Elvis jumpsuit.
Alan rushed over and started violently shaking his shoulders.
"Huh? What happened?" Charlie mumbled, sitting up and rubbing his eyes, still visibly wasted from the night before. "Did we win?"
"Yeah, you won, Uncle Charlie," Jake said casually, grabbing his uncle's arm to help him up. "Come on, let's go back to the hotel."
Luckily, no more accidents happened that morning. They quietly sneaked back into their suite, packed their bags, and by 10:00 AM, they were safely on a plane back to Malibu.
Back on the sunny beaches of California, the Vegas chaos felt just like a distant fever dream.
Jake was currently in the water, trying to learn how to surf alongside his mother, Judith, and Cindy, the beautiful, perpetually chill surfer girl that Charlie let use his outdoor shower.
Splash.
Jake fell off his surfboard for the fourth time in ten minutes, wiping out hard into the salty foam.
"Come on, little dude! You're thinking too much!" Cindy called out, paddling over to him with effortless grace. "You gotta keep your center of gravity low. Pop up fast, bend your knees, and feel the water. Don't fight the wave, let the wave do the work!"
"I'm trying!" Jake coughed, spitting out a mouthful of seawater before hauling himself back onto the board, only to immediately slip and fall right back in.
After another hour of relentless wipeouts, they decided to call it a day and head back up the wooden stairs to the deck of Charlie's house.
"Hey Alan, is the shower open?" Cindy asked, shaking out her wet blonde hair as they stepped through the sliding glass doors.
"Uh, yeah, help yourself," Alan answered, looking up from his newspaper.
"Hi, Alan," Judith said, walking in right behind Cindy, beaming with a massive, relaxed smile that Alan hadn't seen on her face in years.
"Judith?" Alan asked, dropping his paper, completely surprised. "What are you doing here?"
"Cindy's teaching me to surf," Judith said brightly. "She says I'm a natural."
"Well, she definitely has the upper-body strength for it," Cindy said, casually stepping behind Judith and rubbing her shoulders with a familiar, easy affection.
"Oh, nothing like yours," Judith answered humbly, looking back at Cindy.
"You will! You just gotta build up your lats," Cindy said, playfully flexing her back muscles.
"Wow! They are so firm," Judith said, reaching out and giving Cindy's shoulder blade an appreciative squeeze.
"Come on, I'll show you both some stretches before we hit the showers," Cindy said, gesturing for Judith and Jake to follow her toward the hallway.
Alan just stood there in the living room, completely aghast, his jaw practically hitting the floor as he watched his ex-wife and a hot blonde surfer walk away together.
After Judith and Cindy finished their showers, they left with Jake to go catch an indie movie downtown, they left him alone with Alan and Charlie for dinner.
Sitting around the table eating pizza, Jake watched his father nervously tear his pepperonis into tiny pieces. Alan was clearly still obsessing over the morning's beach interaction.
"They are not dating, Dad," Jake said flatly, not even looking up from his slice.
"What?" Alan asked, blinking confusedly at his son.
"Cindy and Mom," Jake clarified. "They are not dating."
"See? Told you," Charlie said around a mouthful of pizza, flashing Alan a smug grin.
"You can't know that! You can't possibly know that!" Alan repeated, pointing a frantic finger at Jake.
"But I can," Jake said simply.
"You can't!" Alan insisted, his voice rising an octave.
"Already did," replied Jake.
"But you ca—"
"Oh, Jesus Christ, Alan, let it go," Charlie groaned, tossing his crust onto the plate. "When has the kid ever been wrong? He's like a little Magic 8-Ball. Just accept it."
Alan slumped his shoulders, letting out a long, defeated sigh. "Oh. Well... I suppose you are right about that."
They returned to eating in silence for a few minutes. Then, Alan suddenly perked up, looking at Jake with a desperate glimmer of hope in his eyes.
"Hey, Jake, is there a chan—"
"No," Jake interrupted.
"You don't even know what I was gonna ask!" Alan said defensively.
"You were going to ask if you and Mom are going to get back together. The answer is no," Jake said deadpan.
"You don't know that!" Alan said, highly offended.
"But I do," Jake insisted again.
"You can't!"
"Already did."
"Oh, God," Charlie muttered, rolling his eyes at the ceiling as the father-son duo started the loop all over again.
...
Author note:
Hey guys!
I finally found where to hit those time skips, the next few chapters are going to have a faster pace.
Question. I decided not to make the story with Harem, that said, before Jake 'settles down' I'm going to have him have several casual relationships. Any recommendations in that department? Also, would you prefer smut or not smut?