I'm still nauseous as I stumble out of the green room. I'm pretty clearly the last one to leave the room - if the others were sleeping in it at all. As I take in the familiar appearance of Alcyone, the first floor (by Earth standards, anyway, Shaula calls it the fourth) of the Watch tower, for a moment it feels like I never left, and once again my stomach rolls-
"Subaru, don't push yourself too hard, I suppose," Says Beatrice, and I gag, covering my mouth. A moment later, I swallow my vomit, and turn, making my way towards the dining hall. I figure that's where everyone will be - and soon enough I hear the telltale nasally tones of Recorder ranting at someone, and end up smiling despite myself. Someone else finally has to deal with the guy, huh?
I pass by a couple more bedrooms as I make my way around the circular room towards the dining hall - passing the one Anastasia used, the one Julius used, and of course Shaula's. But, that girl is probably under enemy control, so-
"Aaah! Master! That smell is Master! Save meeee!" A voice comes from inside that room. "I can't move at all! Master, I gotta pee! Please, let me ooout!"
…
"...Nah, I'm not falling for this one," I say after a moment's reflection. "I don't know any scorpions who'd be stupid enough to snipe at me over and over despite knowing exactly what I look like. Whoever that is must be someone else."
"Maaaassshteeer! I'm soooorry, so pleeease!" With a cold heart, I continue past her door and enter the dining hall.
"-but is that the reality? Of course not! The fact remains that these rumor constructs are not to be trusted!" Sure enough, Recorder is there, displayed in holographic form, jabbing a finger over and over towards Romani. Wow, he's already adopted his Anti-Olga-Marie smile, huh? Should have thought twice before taking my communicator, Doctor.
Not really wanting to deal with that at this exact moment, I scan the room to see who else is up and about.
A blur of chopsticks, of white rice being shoveled into a small mouth - yup, that's the weird Baseball Cap King Arthur from before. Not touching that either.
In the corner of the room, There's a pile of foliage - no, that's Van Gogh! She's curled up and flowers are sprouting from her! "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" she's muttering over and over.
Scandinavia Peperoncino, leaning over her hunched form looks like he's trying to figure out the best way to break her out of it, and meanwhile-
Oh no, there's Miyako. Curled up in a ball in the opposite corner of the room, sheltered inside her oversized jacket. I understand now, I can see the scene in my mind's eye.
Goghie: "Ehe… ehehe… I'm Van Gogh… I hope we're GOGHING to be good friends!"
Micchan: "I'll tear you to pieces."
-And then the inevitable mutual retreat and self recriminations ensued. How terrible, tragic, and yet somehow completely predictable.
And lastly, standing motionless immediately to my right as I enter the room, startling me as I notice his presence is- who?
No, seriously, who is that? A tall bishonen-type with long black hair in a ponytail, wearing ancient Chinese-style armor - who is he!?
"First, you should see to your friend - and then ensure that the scorpion does not soil herself," He says quietly, turning his head slightly towards me. "Our meal should be ready by that point, if that Assassin does not eat all of the side dishes before then." Without another word, he walks away, gliding into the kitchen with a strange, unearthly grace that seems to leave sparkles in his wake.
"No, seriously, who are you!?" I try to protest, but he's already gone - and quickly I see the others glancing at me. Or, at least, Romani, Recorder, and Peperoncino glance at me. Gogh makes no recognizable response, and Miyako-
She shoots to her feet, zips behind me, and wordlessly buries her face in my back. Yeah, that's fair.
"...You messed it up right away?" I ask
"Mhm."
"It'll get better… probably. To be honest, Goghie's a pretty hard challenge right off the bat. Let's start with someone a little easier, okay?"
"Mhm."
I give a hand motion to Peperoncino to signal I'm leaving, and he winks at me - then, with Miyako still clinging to the back of my shirt, I wrap back outside to bring us back towards Shaula's room.
"-Let's start with Shaula. She's dumber than a box of rocks, so she won't take any offense to anything you say, and she was literally sniping at us the entire way here so you don't have to feel bad even if you do insult her!" I explain, reaching for the handle of her door.
"...No, Su-kun, isn't that sniper someone we're supposed to fight?" She mutters.
"Pleeeeaaaaseee! Maaaasteeeer!" A tear filled voice echoes from the room. "I'm really really sorrrrryyyy, so let me goooo!"
Miyako's face grows even more confused, but I ignore her and open the door with a sigh - and there, lying on her bed, bound head to foot, is a would-be-attractive black-haired woman in short shorts, a black bikini top, and a cape. I say would-be-attractive, because all of her sex appeal is killed by the knowledge of what her brain is like.
"Master! Please, untie me! Then you can watch me pee if that's what you want, but at least let me save my shorts!" She says without an ounce of shame.
Miyako's mouth hangs slightly open as her brain crashes and tries to reboot - meanwhile I force my way into the room and pull bindings inscribed with Chinese characters off of her hands-
"Masteeer!" She shouts, lunging upwards and glomping me.
"Stupid! Idiot! Get off, and use the bathroom first! If you have to go so bad, then go do it!"
"Mmmm, nope! I've got Master now, so I'll sacrifice my pants to keep this hug going!" Not like this.
"Micchan! Micchan, you gotta get her off of me, she's completely serious! This moron has absolutely zero pride as a woman or even as a human being!" I shout, trying to pry Shaula off of me. With horror, I start to hear the sound of the door closing. "NoooOOO! Micchan, please, I'm begging you, don't leave me to this fate!" I saved your life and this is how you repay me!?
"F-fine… Then take this! [Morals Correcting Punch]!"
Shaula's grip breaks, and she flies across the room, cratering into the wall with a dull thud. A moment later, she peels herself out of the hole with a groan. "OwwwWWW! Fiend, monster! What the heck are they feeding you, Lil' Red?"
"'Lil Red'?" I echo. Miyako doesn't even wear red anymore, that was her elementary school fit.
"Yeah, cause she's little, and she's Red?" Shaula answers with a tilted head. Right, I forgot she's a moron.
"No, before that! Bathroom! Right there! Go, now!" I shout. I can't believe I have to tell her this.
***
"So?" I ask as we wait outside Shaula's room for her to finish her business.
"I have no words. I think my social anxiety has overflowed, crashed, and died. What the hell was that?" Miyako asks.
"Yeah, that's pretty much the Shaula experience. It's worse when you know that in the other world, her legend has her as… something like their equivalent of Merlin I guess. She's supposed to be a legendary freakin' Sage, you know?"
"I'm done! So, here I cooome-!" Shaula's voice approaches the door.
"Did you wash your hands?" I ask, and she goes silent.
Miyako wordlessly points at the door, a look of slightly annoyed confusion on her face.
"Yeah, apparently some guy foisted all his achievements off on her or something," I say with a sigh.
"That was yooooou, master!" She calls out.
"It was not!" I protest. I was feeling confused a bit earlier, but I've reaffirmed my convictions. "There's not a chance I'm Flugel! You're just confused, like I keep saying!"
"Isn't that literally the alias you used last night though…?" Miyako mutters.
"Oh like I want to hear that from you, miss 'I'm a normal High School girl'," I retort, crossing my arms.
"O-oh. Um, on that subject. While I was asleep… er, while you were saving me apparently. Thanks. For saving my life, I mean. It already slipped my mind, but thanks, Su-kun," She says.
"Hm? I mean, you saved me a good couple of times up to that point, so don't worry about it," I reply. "-In the first place, friends are supposed to do this sort of thing for each other, right?"
"Ah," Her eyes widen, and then she gives a wide smile. "That's right! You're right, Su-kun. Oh, um - back to my dream! I got stronger! A cat and a little girl gave me some hot chocolate, and I beat a guy named Kishi Totec or something, and now I can punch harder!"
"Ah! You're right! You definitely used some kind of special move on Shaula back there!" I say. "The name was a little weak, but we can workshop it!"
"Wasn't it just the [Palm of the Fist King]?" Shaula mutters as she leaves her room, rubbing her jaw. "That's what the white-haired Master calls that move. What's up with Lil' red using it anyway? She doesn't smell like those three."
As usual, I have no idea what she's talking about - the name is vaguely familiar, and I get that she's referencing that thing further up the Tower, but-
"There was some name like that, maybe? Something about [Demisabanto]? There was a lot of Spanish being spoken, I didn't really get it," Miyako says - ah?
"Tezcatlipoca? Was Tezcatlipoca involved? Little brat, about this tall, sunglasses and sharp teeth?" I ask with a mix of the excitement of solving a mystery and the natural worry of my childhood friend being involved in clear trouble.
"Yeah! That's who gave me the hot chocolate! And then there was…" She trails off. "-Len. Did Len not make it out?"
"That familiar has returned to its master," Ah! The Mysterious Chinese Warrior has emerged from the dining hall! Were we taking too long?
"Gyaaaaa!?" Shaula screams, hiding behind me. "It was Master! Master let me out, yep! And I wasn't going to do anything bad, just sexually harass him a bit!" I slap her hand away from my butt. Please choose between hiding and provocation already! "Please don't hit me! Please don't beat me up again! Please don't tie me up again, I learned my lesson Mr. Xiang Yu!"