"Wait, don't be rash. I know that sounds uncouth, but I mean they taste pretty good. That's beside the point. Well, you know what they say about dark meat: it really is more flavorful, succulent, and tender. It wasn't my fault.
They just looked so tasty, and I was so hungry. I mean, everybody does. I remember it like it was yesterday."
"It was yesterday," the judge said.
"Moving on. It was a wonderful afternoon. The sun was shining, birds were singing, and I was turning my family into quite the spread.
My mother was quite sharp and bright. I preserved that about her in the sauce. It would have been a waste not to."
"As for my father, he had a way to bring the family together so I slowly cooked him into braised short ribs, something that required patience. He always appreciated patience."
"Then finally, for dessert, my sister always had a hard exterior but broke if you cut deep enough. A proper pie seemed fitting."
After I finished cooking, I started up my mukbang stream, HeHumanEats. You should check it out.
"Are you self-promoting right now?" the judge said.
"Yes. Yes, I am. There is always time for self-promos. Can I continue now?"
"Yes, you may, even though I don't really want to," the judge said.
"Now, where was I? Oh, yes. After I started streaming my feast, I was suddenly raided by the police… after I finished my delicious meal."
"So back to my question: did you kill them?" the judge said.
"So when you say 'kill,' what do you mean? Could you use that in a sentence?"
"As in the act of taking a life from another being, physically," the judge said.
"Ah, yes. Thank you for clearing it up. No, I did not kill them, because they were already dead… in a sense."
"Please elaborate. Whatever do you mean, 'dead in a sense'?" the judge said.
"It wasn't me who killed them. It was society that killed them from the inside and made them dead on the outside. I was practically doing them a favor. And it was a very delicious favor, may I add."
"I'm going to hold you in contempt of court. You just confessed on record," the judge said.
"So that's like twenty to twenty-five years, right? Not too bad, if I say so myself. I'm content with that. Alright, Judge S, what's the verdict?"
"Before that, you seemed to enjoy word games. Let's try one. What starts with D and ends with H?" Judge S said.
At first, Edmund wondered what he was getting at. Perhaps he was making a joke because he was going to give him a slap on the wrist.
"To answer your question, is it double homicide? A little court humor before dismissing my case. You know, Judge S, you're a pretty chill guy, if I do say so."
"Interesting that that was your first thought. It was death," Judge S said.
"Fuck."
"My final verdict is this: I sentence you, Edmund G. Sterling, to death by electric chair," Judge S said. "Take him out of here."
As the officers took Edmund out of the courthouse and placed him in the vehicle, he did not resist.
Edmund only wondered if prison seasoning would be adequate. Instead of thinking about the loved ones he had devoured and butchered, he wondered what his final meal would be. How gluttonous.
When the car came to a halt at his final destination, Edmund was taken out and began to speak.
"So this is where I will die. How bleak. Anyway, when do I get my last meal?"
"Huh, there's no way that's the first thing you say when you just got here," said the officer.
"I was in deep thought on the way here about what I wanted. So chop-chop, officer. I'm hungry." Edmund said.
"Do you only think about your next meal and nothing more?" said the officer.
"Well, yes. When I'm hungry, obviously. So could you stop with the questions? You're ruining my mood." Edmund said
They entered the prison.
"So, is this place as sad and bleak as it looks?" Edmund said.
"Yes, it is. It should be sad and bleak," the officer said.
The officer sat Edmund down at a table.
"What is it you like to have for your final meal?" the officer said.
"I want a ribeye steak, two inches thick, pan-seared in a cast-iron skillet, cooked medium-well, with a side of macaroni and cheese." Edmund said.
"Okay, so one steak and mac and cheese. Got it. Is that it?" the officer said.
"No, it is not, and make sure to tell them as I have told you. Now, for dessert, let me get some bread pudding," Edmund said.
"But before you go, I have a request. Could I livestream my last meal?"
"I'll ask. They'll most likely say no," the officer said.
Sometime later, the officer comes back… with a camera and a microphone.
"So they said yes, and your food will be here soon. You should set up for whatever you are going to do" the officer said.
As the guard brought in the food, Edmund finishes setting up.
"Hello my loyal viewers, it is a pleasure to see you all again. I know you all are wondering what happened to me after I was captured by the police." Edmund said.
"But you need not worry, as I will soon meet my end. But let's push past that. I have what I hope will be a lovely last meal. Sadly, I can't see any of your comments because this setup they gave me sucks."
"At last, here it comes. Huh. What is this supposed to be?" Edmund said.
"Here is your food," the officer said.
"What is this supposed to be truly? It looks like you just cut any part of a cow's body, put it on the grill, and dared to call it a ribeye" Edmund said.
"You know what, maybe I'm just judging based on the look. The inside and taste will surely save it." Edmund said
Then Edmund cut into the steak. A look of disappointment crossed his face. Not only did it lack that melt-in-your-mouth flavor — it was overcooked.
"You call this a steak? This must be a joke, this thing has the juiciness and tenderness of boot leather. This has ruined my appetite. If this is the standard for cooking here, I'll save my taste buds from whatever horrors are on my plate."
"I would like to apologize to you, my viewers, for what you had to see.
Had I known this place served such low-quality food — if you could even call it that — I would not have shared this sad experience.
HeHumanEats out. And don't forget to like and subscribe."
"You done?"
"Yes, lead me to the chair. And hopefully this time you guys can follow directions."
The officer rolled his eyes as they left the room. The hallway was quiet — almost unnaturally so. It was full of people who had accepted this was the end of the line — no escaping, no cheating death.
But Edmund was no different. He was not afraid of what came after death, only curious about what this death will give him closure, freedom, or something new to explore.
"What a nice chair you've got. Very early 21st century. Looks like something you'd find in some old lady's attic."
"Just sit down and be quiet," The officer said.
"Fine and here I thought we were at the start of a new friendship," Edmund said.
"I don't make friends with those who will die soon."
"Good point but you can still make friends even if it's short-lived," Edmund said.
"I think you made the right strap too tight."
"That does not matter to me. Die uncomfortable."
"Do you have any last words before I flip the switch?"
"Yes. All that begins also ends. That's all"
"What is that, some sort of prayer or something?"
"No, it's more like a saying. You can pull the switch. I'm ready to see what electricity going through me feels like."
"I don't know why I even asked."
As the officer pulled the switch, Edmund heard the machine hum to life. When the electricity surged through his body, he felt—
The current of energy lasted only a moment. But Edmund lingered. And beneath what remained, he felt it.
Hunger.
Not the kind that had gnawed at his stomach, his whole life.
No longer did he crave meat, but something new.
Yes. This world — he had consumed it.
There was nothing left here for him.
Only the Hunger remained.
It turned into a question.
Begin again — or fade?
He answers—