The cafeteria had settled into that rare post-meal calm.
Empty boxes stacked in uneven towers.
People leaning back in chairs.
That soft lull where even the loudest sorcerers temporarily forget to cause problems.
Yuji stretched his arms over his head.
"…This is a great day."
Megumi exhaled slowly.
"…It's suspiciously peaceful."
Nobara leaned back with a satisfied look.
"…I approve. Fully."
Hakari nodded from across the table.
"…No missions. No curses. Just food. This is peak living."
Kirara quietly sipped a drink.
"…It won't last."
Takeru was lounging on a stack of boxes like it was a throne.
Crunch.
Another bite of pizza.
"…I fully approve," he said between chews.
A pause.
"And if Utahime can say only nice things to me and the Gojo's…"
He pointed casually toward the room.
"I will buy her whatever she wants for an hour."
Utahime froze mid-step.
Utahime Iori
"…Excuse me?"
Gojo immediately perked up.
Satoru Gojo
"Ohhh that's dangerous wording."
Geto didn't even look surprised anymore.
Suguru Geto
"…You're bribing her with emotional restraint."
Yuji blinked.
"…That's not how compliments are supposed to work."
Megumi muttered.
"…Nothing about him is normal incentive structure."
Utahime crossed her arms.
"…Why would I agree to that."
Takeru tilted his head slightly.
"…Money?"
Silence.
Hakari leaned forward.
"…He's got you there."
Kirara immediately elbowed him.
"…Don't encourage this."
Utahime looked like she was actively fighting her own sanity.
"…I am not being bribed into politeness."
Gojo grinned.
"…Sounds like a challenge."
Geto finally sighed.
"…This is going to become a negotiation war, isn't it."
Takeru shrugged.
"…I can extend the offer."
A pause.
"For two hours."
Yuji immediately pointed.
"…HE IS NEGOTIATING UPWARD."
Megumi rubbed his face.
"…He's scaling the bribe."
Nobara sat up slightly.
"…I kind of respect the strategy."
Kirara sighed again.
"…Of course you do."
Utahime closed her eyes for a moment.
"…I hate all of you."
Gojo leaned closer.
"…That's not nice."
Utahime snapped instantly.
"…I'M NOT PARTICIPATING IN THIS."
Takeru leaned back again, unconcerned.
Crunch.
"…Offer stands."
Geto shook his head slightly.
"…You've turned diplomacy into a transaction."
Takeru nodded.
"…Efficient."
And for a brief moment—
everyone just sat there.
Full.
Calm.
Suspiciously satisfied.
Even Utahime, despite herself, didn't leave immediately.
Because somehow—
even with all the chaos, cursed spirits, islands, rankings, and pizza-based ecosystems—
this was the first time in a while that everyone had just… stopped.