Translator - Zofu
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From the center of the world, I screamed with all my heart.
"Ah~! I wanna have sex~~!!"
Passersby looked at me like they were looking at a retard.
A narrow alleyway with lots of foot traffic.
A hot place densely packed with bars, restaurants, and dating spots.
Women dressed up and men acting all high and mighty swarmed like cockroaches.
I was the only one alone there.
Because I had just been dumped by my girlfriend.
No. Calling it dumped feels off. I don't even know if she was a real girlfriend.
We only talked about dating, never did anything couple-like.
So I asked to have sex at least once before breaking up.
But what came back wasn't sex, it was a slap across the ear.
"Fuck... I'm confident I'd be good at it, though."
Rubbing my still-numbing cheek, I glared resentfully at the passing couples.
I was confident that if I just did it, I'd be good.
But the problem was I couldn't even stand at the starting line of 'doing it.'
What on earth is the difference between that guy with a beauty on his arm and me?
Is it the face? It's the face, isn't it! Fuck!
"Huh?!"
When I glared at a passing gigolo-looking guy like I was going to eat him, the man ran as if avoiding a madman.
"Damn it."
I suppressed my anger and hurried home on my way back.
Then, a group of women caught my eye.
About 7 to 8 young women were walking in a line from the front.
Women's specialty. Walking in a group but not yielding the way.
Wow. The incarnation of self-centeredness!
Why do these female creatures walk in a line even in a narrow alley?
Even when they clearly see someone coming from the front.
Come to think of it, in dramas, a fate is created just by a man and woman bumping into each other on the street.
That's probably because those guys are as pretty and handsome as actors.
If a guy like me bumped into a woman, probably only a fight would break out.
Thinking that made me even more pissed off.
"Ah!"
-Thud!
Did that happen because I was walking with those thoughts? In the end, trouble broke out.
I twisted my shoulder slightly to avoid the women coming towards me.
However, the woman walking right in front of me didn't move even a millimeter. As if it was 100% natural for me, a man, to stick to the wall to avoid her.
As a result, the woman's shoulder bumped slightly into my shoulder as I tried to avoid her. (Even though the woman was my type, I didn't bump into her on purpose.)
Slightly. Very slightly. Just enough to graze and fall off, we brushed against each other.
To me, it only felt like a butterfly had landed and flown away.
But it seemed that wasn't the case for the woman.
"Ugh! What the hell?!"
The woman made a fuss and raised her voice.
Wow. Just as expected.
The reaction I imagined.
For a guy like me, a connection or fate is nonsense.
"What is it? What happened?"
"Why? Are you hurt?"
"Did you bump into that person?"
The women standing in a line huddled together into a gang in an instant.
Fuck. If you were going to do that, you should have walked like that from the beginning.
"Mister! If you hit someone, shouldn't you apologize?"
The woman who bumped into me glared at me with daggers in her eyes.
Of course, I was at fault for not avoiding her completely.
But if we consider negligence, it was a 3:7 ratio, or at worst 4:6, so the woman's fault was greater.
Even Teacher Han Moon-cheol would grab the back of his neck.
Above all, the way she spoke was so dickish. Fuck.
"No, I didn't hit you, your side is..."
"What's what?!"
Even though I spoke politely, the woman rushed at me as if she was going to hit me right away.
Damn it. Should I really hit her?
Women's specialty. Since they've never been hit, they can't even imagine being hit.
So they cross the line and do things that deserve hitting without any hesitation.
But the woman was in a group, so I was unconditionally at a disadvantage.
Even if dragged to the police, they would unconditionally take that woman's side.
And if I somehow got framed with a weird charge, wouldn't my life be ruined?
"Sigh..."
I finally got to breathe some outside air. I didn't want my life to get complicated for nothing.
I held it in even though it was disgusting. And I was just going to apologize and end it.
At that moment.
Among the group of women, a woman who had been looking at me with a bored expression spoke loudly.
"Huh? Hey! You're King Juji, aren't you?"
"Huh."
King Juji.
I didn't hear wrong. And it's not likely that this woman misspoke.
Because King Juji was nothing other than my childhood nickname.
The reason for such a nickname is very simple.
...Because my name is Ju Ji-wan.
Although my Juji is big, it's not because my real Juji is King-sized that I got such a nickname.
For elementary schoolers, a name is like a spring that gushes out nicknames.
Twisting my name Juji wang to call me King Juji, or 'Jajiwang' (Dick King), was a very natural flow.
But that was a long time ago.
After high school, naturally no one called me that way. I wasn't an elementary schooler.
But to be called that way by a woman my age at this age. Should I be happy?
"Huh? What? Who? Who is it? Shinji?"
Seeing her call me King Juji, there's a high possibility she was a childhood friend.
So I tried to speak casually. But for some reason, the moment I was about to ask in banmal, the atmosphere of the women turned murderous instantly. That's why I hurriedly attached honorifics.
What the hell. It wasn't this murderous even when I had a beef with that woman earlier.
Is it necessary to glare as if everyone is going to kill me just because I spoke informally?
"Hahaha! Look at this bastard. It's me! Me! Don't you know who I am?"
"Uh..."
However, the woman ignored that atmosphere and pretended to be close by thumping my shoulder.
"Huh? What, really?"
The nickname King Juji is familiar, but I have no memory of being called that way by a woman.
Naturally, that was a nickname only guys called each other, and if a passing woman was about to hear it, they would hate it in disgust.
But there is a woman calling me King Juji like this, so I can't help but be dumbfounded.
If such a pretty woman was around me, I wouldn't have forgotten.
"Unnie. Do you know him?"
"Seonbae, don't do that and let's go quickly."
"Yeah. Even his face looks like a dick. It's annoying."
"...What?"
Anyway, while the situation was roughly sorting itself out.
I heard words that I, who am called the reincarnation of Buddha, could not ignore.
I can endure insulting my face. Because it's a fact that I'm ugly.
But I cannot forgive insulting *my* face.
"This fuck, what did you just say?"
It was the woman I bumped into who insulted my face.
That woman started muttering again, blaming me.
"No, your side bumped into me and won't apologize..."
At that moment.
-Slap!
The sound of a slap rang out crisply.
For a moment, I flinched thinking I was hit.
But that wasn't it.
The woman I had a beef with was holding her own cheek with a look of disbelief.
It was that woman who had pretended to know me who slapped that woman.
My jaw dropped to the ground.
"Get lost. You ruined my mood."
"Se, Se-in...?"
The surprising thing didn't end there.
I expected the woman who got hit once to unleash her dirty temper and rush in, but in front of the woman who hit her, she became completely a docile sheep and was actually groveling.
"Sor, sorry, Se-in. I didn't mean to do that..."
"Se-in Seonbae. Jo-young Unnie didn't know. Calm down."
And the other women also tried to mediate between the two by acting cute.
...Wait.
Se-in? Se-in?
"Fuck! Get lost, all of you!"
The woman who slapped shouted.
Only then did the group of women startle and scurry away from their spot.
Among them, there was even a woman who was acting like a baby, saying things like "Seonbae, I'll text you," until the end.
"Ha, fuck. This is why women are..."
The woman left alone, grumbling.
She's a woman herself, what is she saying?
No. There was a more important problem than that.
"Hey, don't tell me it's Jeong Se-in?"
"Finally recognize me, you bastard."
A flower of smile bloomed on the face of the woman turning back to look at me.
"No... but you..."
My head was filled with confusion.
If she's Jeong Se-in, she's a childhood friend who lived in the same neighborhood until the lower grades of elementary school.
A childhood friend means having testicles.
But...
I looked at the woman's face, chest, and hips in turn.
Face. Fair, soft, and slender. Eyes, nose, and mouth are distinct, and her face size is the size of my fist.
Chest. Her parents must have fed her only good things. Despite being skinny as a rail, only her chest stuck out.
Hips. Is her mother a foreigner? Something resembling a chest was attached to her butt.
She wasn't a childhood friend.
She was definitely a girl.
"What."
"Why are you a woman?"
"What. I was originally a woman, fuck."
"??"
No way.
Is that possible?
"Don't tell me... did you get a sex change?"
I have a pretty open mind about modern PC society.
So I asked without prejudice, but from the listener's perspective, it seemed not so.
-Whack!
Jeong Se-in hit my head.
"I was originally a woman, fuck!"
Even after hearing that, my head was still confused.
How can Jeong Se-in be a woman?
I pieced together fragmentary memories from when I was young.
'King Juji! Why King Juji?'
'Why? Because Juji is King-sized, so he's King Juji!'
In front of Jeong Se-in who asked that, I hastily showed my Juji.
Then Jeong Se-in saw my hasty Juji and was admiring it.
'Ooh! As expected of King Juji! You live up to your name!'
Being praised like that was a small joy of my childhood.
Having a slightly bigger Juji than the kids around me was a subtle source of pride.
Come to think of it, I've exposed my Juji many times, but I don't have many memories of seeing other friends' Juji.
Jeong Se-in was the same. I just showed mine, never saw hers.
"I'm not an idiot, to mistake you, a woman, for a man?"
"Yeah. You are an idiot."
Then Jeong Se-in laughed like she was going to die.
No way!
Jeong Se-in was definitely a man.
Although he had a somewhat fair face, he had no chest or hips.
He ran well, played games well, and dressed like a man. His height was almost similar to mine.
"...Huh??"
But now that I recalled those pieces of evidence, there wasn't a single piece of evidence that he was definitely a man.
When young, the boundary between men and women is vague.
Not having a chest or hips is natural for an elementary schooler.
There are plenty of women taller than men.
"You... were you really a woman?"
"Puhahaha!"
I was still asking doubtfully.
And Jeong Se-in was laughing out loud.
Then did I whip out my Juji in front of a girl? Crazy!
"Ha, fuck, so funny. King Juji, how come you haven't changed a bit?"
"Ha......."
Jeong Se-in was shedding tears of laughter, but I was at a loss for words from the greatest shock of my life.
How can a guy I believed was a childhood friend be a woman?
Isn't this a story that only comes out in romantic comedy manga?
"Don, don't tell me this is... a twist of a romantic comedy?"
"Pfft! Puhahaha-!"
At my mutter, Jeong Se-in laughed so hard she was about to collapse.
...It seems my life genre isn't a romantic comedy.
Then is it just a comedy without romance?
Tch. Whatever. It's better than being depressed.
"Hey, hey. Stop laughing already."
"Kkuk, you're funny. Heuk."
Jeong Se-in was at the point of crying from laughing too much.
Sigh... really.
When I was young, was my eyes crooked? How could I mistake this for a man?
"Ha. My stomach hurts so much. Where is your house?"
"What? Why my house?"
"Why? Fuck. Because of you, I lost a place to stay. And since we met after a long time, aren't you going to buy me a drink?"
While saying that, Jeong Se-in hooked her arm on mine.
Her behavior was no different from a male friend.
However, the soft sensation of the chest touching my arm. And the scent wafting from her body was insisting that this guy was definitely a woman.
Jeong Se-in.
Should I treat this as a friend or as a woman?
The confusion in my head still didn't subside.
"Ah, whatever. Fuck, let's go!"
"Puhahat!"
I, who was worrying, hooked my arm on Se-in's shoulder in the same way.
Even that was funny to Jeong Se-in, and she burst into laughter again.
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