As I watched the night reveal itself under the delicate light of the moon, I drew in the clean scent of lilies that reached my nose. The stars wrapped around the sky, winking down below, while the city lights faded one by one. The sound of tree branches swaying at intervals in the wind echoed faintly. The air was bitterly cold. The desert's scorching daytime heat had given way to that infamous night chill that seeped into my bones. While the people of the Kingdom of Sands drifted into sleep, I remained there until the wind began to sting my skin. There was no point in torturing myself any further. I stepped back inside from the balcony and quietly closed the door behind me. There was no strength left in my body - I was completely exhausted. It must have been days since that incident.
My mind was as empty as the sky filled with that cold air. Not even the faintest spark of thought lit up within it. I would wake in the morning, be forced through my daily care, then night would fall again, and then the sun would rise once more. Even thinking about it made my chest tighten. At night, the screams in my mind grew louder. Sometimes I would lose myself, clutching my head as I paced back and forth in my room, not even aware of what I was doing. The blood on my hands would not fade. The scent of blood in my nose never left. But when morning came, when the sunlight poured through my window, it became even worse. The entire palace seemed to collapse on top of me, and the sky appeared red before my eyes.
I did not deserve this. My face - the one I could not even bear to look at - was covered in wounds and ached constantly. Every time I thought I did not deserve what I had gone through, my nails would dig into my face or into my long black hair. Then the voice inside me would speak - "You did not deserve this, but what about them?"
I wanted so badly to silence that voice.
I, who had lived between freezing walls since I was a child, trained to become a weapon, constantly reminded that I was different - I had never known warmth. Everything was ice-cold, and I was always freezing. But since when had those frozen hands begun cutting through other flesh?
I knew we had done this for the good of the world, for salvation. To awaken what was sacred once more, to restore the order of the world shattered by the Kingdom of the Abyss. I knew all of this. And yet, it was unacceptable. There had to be another way. A path where no blood was spilled, where one life was not deemed more valuable than another.
I had to find a way. But I no longer had the strength to think any further. Before the time came, before I was warned, I chose to lie down in my bed and close my eyes.
...
I opened my eyes with a loud crash. I was startled as soldiers and servants entered my room suddenly and without warning. They had surrounded my room and pulled me from the first peaceful sleep I had had in days. Before I could ask what was happening, my maid Donna grabbed my arm and pulled me upright.
"You must prepare immediately, my lady. The King has ordered us to take you to the Palace of Ice."
Donna approached me with a dress she had hastily taken from the wardrobe, her hands trembling.
What I heard made me release a breath I didn't realize I had been holding. My mind filled with countless questions.
"I'm sorry, but I was not informed of this. If you could explain what is happening-"
Before I could finish my sentence, they began to search my room, turning everything upside down. I could not understand this sudden harsh behavior. Before I could even tell them to stop, I had already been dragged from where I stood and was quickly shut into my dressing room by the maid.
"It would be better for you not to question it, my lady. You will understand the reason once you arrive."
As she quickly untied the laces of my dress, she paused for a brief moment. That pause was not a good sign - I had seen the sorrow in her eyes. They looked as if they had turned red from crying. Donna was like the only drop of water I had found in the desert. Her motherly nature made me feel, even if only a little, what it was like to be a child and to have the warmth of a family. She took care of both me and Aaron, the other person closest to me. She and Aaron were my family.
As she quickly gathered my hair, I wanted to ask something. I almost opened my mouth - but Donna turned her back as if she had done it deliberately. I fell silent. It felt as though something inside me had shattered at that moment. I could not say a single word.
Even when they rushed me into the carriage, I said nothing. With a body that could not even hear my own mind, I followed the instructions unconsciously. Just before Donna placed me into the carriage, she held my hand and pressed a quick kiss onto my forehead. She turned away immediately, but even in that single second I noticed her eyes filled with tears. A terrible feeling filled me, and a heavy knot settled in my chest.
After composing herself, my maid came to me one last time, now accompanied by a tall man.
"He will watch over you. You will travel using the portal."
She quickly gestured for the man to step inside. As everything happened so quickly, the tall man was already sitting across from me. Just before the carriage began to move, I heard her voice one last time.
"Luna!"
I immediately turned my head and leaned forward to see her. Tears were now freely flowing from her eyes.
"Have a safe journey," she called out, her voice fading toward the end.
I managed to wave back instinctively. We were truly leaving.
Unable to suppress my anxiety any longer, I glanced at the man sitting across from me and asked,
"Do you have any idea what is happening, sir? If you know something, please tell me."
The man, who I could sense possessed special powers, turned his glowing eyes toward me. Even though I had no power, my senses were strong, and I could perceive those with high rank and magical abilities. In this world, only important individuals could use magic, and it was impossible to miss them - there was always something distinct or luminous about their appearance.
"We will take you through the portal, my lady. I have been assigned to protect you so that you may endure the process without side effects. I will protect you with my magic. Do not worry."
After revealing that he was a mage, his voice softened. But no more words left his mouth, and he turned his gaze back toward the trees.
"A real portal," I whispered.
What could be so important? I was certain that my ritual had failed. If it had succeeded, those who ruled the kingdom would have shaken the heavens by now.
"Then we are going to the villages of Altınırmak..."
"Yes, my lady. I suggest you enjoy the journey."
His eyes remained fixed on the trees.
The villages of Altınırmak were close to the royal palace - we only needed to travel a little further past the lake. Although I had always been curious about the place, I had never been there. I had neither a reason nor the time to visit it before. This could be an opportunity to observe the village. I had heard very unique things about its people. I was about to ask again, but it was futile. When I realized the tall, slender man had closed his eyes and entered a trance, any hope of getting a response disappeared.
Throughout the journey, I tried to calm myself and watched the view of the lake. Perhaps they were assigning me a special task, and they needed to tell me the details later. Or... had they given up on me? Were they taking me away to get rid of me? My thoughts were not helping.
The City of Memories - the city where I carried out that massacre - had once been known as a city belonging to the Kingdom of Ice. But that had been centuries ago, and I had no connection to that part of the world. The Kingdom of Ice lay on the other side of the world, and without a portal, it could take months to reach it. I could not stop myself from wondering what could be so urgent. The view of the lake helped me breathe, even if only a little. Birds were singing their usual songs on an ordinary day. When the sounds of a crowd and lively children began to rise, I understood that we were about to arrive at the village.
"Hold tight, my lady."
After a long silence, the man spoke and immediately ordered the carriage to accelerate. I realized we had passed through the village gates when we went through a large entrance. I leaned my head out to see the people and the surroundings. Modest yet magnificent adobe houses welcomed us. People were going about their work in clothing suitable for the desert climate. But some of them saw me as I leaned out, and a murmur rose among the people. This made me tense up even more as I gripped the seat tightly. People were raising their voices in anger, and a few were hurling curses. The crowd had suddenly recognized me and began whispering my name.
Although I could not understand how they recognized me, I knew that most of this village consisted of people with suppressed power and knowledge. They must have known something. To calm me, perhaps, a few unfamiliar words rose from the man's lips. The words he spoke had a soothing effect. Still, they were not enough. With my heart racing and anxiety tightening my throat, I listened. Then, finally, he spoke the piece of information I had been waiting for.
"In the Kingdom of Ice, Prince Kieran will receive you. There will be an execution, and you will play a role in it."
I thought I sensed arrogance in his words, but I could have been mistaken. I was extremely tense. The carriage had turned onto a side road before passing through the center of the village, and the voices had faded before I could fully understand them. Then the man paused and looked directly into my eyes. This caused my already tense muscles to tighten even further. I felt overwhelmed.
"Are you certain the ritual failed, my lady?"
He was looking at me with a deep and strange suspicion.
It could not have succeeded. I had personally taken the blood of the entire people with that enchanted sword. The spilled blood had remained on the ground, and the sword had shown no reaction. According to the ritual, the sword was supposed to sharpen, its magic to intensify. This weapon, already powerful, was meant to become unstoppable. But when I brought it back, the royal mages who examined it said there had been no change. And I was left behind with the blood I had spilled - and with trauma.
"I am certain," I replied firmly.
The mage slowly leaned back, one eyebrow slightly raised, his eyes drifting toward the sky. Before much time passed, I felt that he had noticed something, because he ordered the carriage to stop.
"We have arrived at the portal, my lady."
I followed him out of the carriage with slow, hesitant steps. There was nothing here - just a barren slope with a few pale trees. My eyes scanned the surroundings with curiosity, waiting to feel something.
"We will now enter the portal. Hold my hand tightly and do not let go."
I reached out and took the hand of the man with glowing eyes. The veil of a mystery was about to be lifted. As I stood beside him and my breathing quickened, I listened to the magical words coming from his mouth.
The sky - what I believed to be the portal - suddenly began to move. Symbols in a language I did not recognize and a beam of light spun above us in a circular form. This magnificent sight made me feel as if I were flying.
While I was lost in the grandeur of it all, the mage spoke:
"I - Mage Gideon - have been ordered to escort the condemned Luna to the Palace of Ice. Great portal, I command you - grant us passage."