My Beautiful, Versatile, Tall, and Beautiful Delivery Woman.
Morning sunlight streamed through the window, gradually dispelling the room's chill and replacing it with a gentle warmth.
Su Ming yawned and stretched lazily, his little brother stirring in protest.
A bitter smile crossed Su Ming's face. "No way! I'm such a great guy—straight or gay, flexible, can be cute, can be silly, can play a young boy or a mature man, can do sweet or spicy, can pretend to be a virgin, can handle threesomes, can wear a sailor suit, can wield a small whip, can enjoy classical concerts and street food, can roast you with venomous wit or be dark and scheming, can laugh uproariously at dirty jokes or gaze at the stars with you, can shed tears over art films or remain unfazed by gore and oddities.
I'm a diligent young man who spends his days in the library, but I also indulge in drinking and staying out all night. I'm brave enough to be gay and into fanfiction without crying or complaining. I'm loyal and righteous, but I have no status or recognition.
On the surface, I'm calm and detached, but inside, my heart is a stormy sea. How can such a great guy like me still be single?"
*Alright, fine. Life without a woman is tough, but why does a man as incredibly handsome and charming as myself keep running into such bad luck? Why can't anything go my way?*
*When I went with my two buddies to tease the girls in class, they got chewed out and I got spat on—though I was the one who started it, of course.*
*When I was broke and sweet-talked two little girls into buying ice cream, we were about to skip out when the owner came after us with a knife. The girls said, "Brother, we don't have any money!" (Tragic...)*
*That night, unable to afford cigarettes, I cut a section of power line from the roadside and tried to sell it to the scrap dealer. The old lady went ballistic: "You son of a bitch! Stealing my damn wires!" (What the hell...)*
*Tell me, why does such a refined and sophisticated man have to be so unlucky and unable to get girls?*
Su Ming picked up a mirror and examined himself seriously, trying to figure out what was wrong. After a moment, he smiled narcissistically. "Hmm, no problems here. Still incredibly handsome and charming. This face could at least captivate the school beauty, if not the entire class. The legendary cohabitation? Here I come!"
Putting on a cool facade, Su Ming descended to the first-floor living room. He went to the bathroom, squeezed some toothpaste onto his toothbrush, and quickly brushed his teeth and washed his face. He also grabbed a quick bite to eat before returning to his room to tidy up his books.
His room was a mess, with nothing in its proper place. The old computer was covered in dust, and the bed was a tangled heap of clothes and pillows. Cigarette butts littered the floor—a true sign of a modern-day otaku, of course, and he had to maintain that image.
After gathering his books and slinging on his backpack, Su Ming left the room to head to school. His mother, Wang Xiu, had already gone to work and wouldn't be back until late. He made sure to lock the door securely—even if he was a bit of a thief himself, it was hard to guard against other thieves.
*Knock, knock.* Just as Su Ming was about to open the door, someone knocked from outside.
"Li Gao, you bastard! Here to borrow money again?" Su Ming knew exactly who it was—that scumbag Li Gao. *Don't tell me he blew all his money trying to impress some girl and needs cash for bus fare to school again...*
If that's true, cutting off my brotherhood with him... Damn it, he owes me over five hundred yuan and hasn't even thought about repaying it.
He opened the door and was immediately stunned. He'd been expecting Li Gao, but the person standing there wasn't him. It was a female delivery driver, tall and slender, with a fair complexion and a smile.
"Hello! I'm here to deliver a package," the driver said slowly, holding a cardboard box.
"A delivery?" Su Ming was confused, looking at the package in her hand.
"Isn't it? This is the designated address—Citizen's Home No. 668. Take a look yourself. Isn't this your address?" she said with a smile, noticing his confusion.
Su Ming glanced at the address on the package. It was indeed his detailed address. He hadn't ordered anything online. Could it be his mother? Or someone sending something to her?
"Please pay the delivery fee. I have other packages to deliver and can't stay long," the driver urged, pushing the box forward.
"Alright, how much?" Su Ming patted his pocket and pulled out some money. Thankfully, his mother had given him 80 yuan for his allowance this month; otherwise, he wouldn't have had enough to pay.
"55 yuan," the female courier said as she handed him the package.
"No way, that's so expensive?" Su Ming reluctantly paid the 55 yuan. The courier smiled and drove off. Just as he was about to take the package to his mother's room, he noticed the recipient's name wasn't his mother's, but a man named Xia Tianming.
Su Ming immediately guessed this wasn't his mother's package—the courier must have delivered it to the wrong address. No, wait—it was probably the sender who had written the address incorrectly. *That idiot! Can't even get an address right.*
Just as Su Ming was about to go out and tell the courier it didn't belong to his family, the courier had already vanished, seemingly in a hurry and driving off in some unknown direction.
"Damn it! I wasted my money! My 55 yuan allowance is gone just like that. Fine, since I paid for it, I don't care who it belongs to. I'm opening it to see what's inside!" Su Ming, feeling a surge of anger, decided to open the package and find out what it contained.
Su Ming tore open the packaging. His eyes widened in surprise as he discovered a peculiar, pale cyan object inside. It looked like neither a circuit board nor a jade token, but rather radiated a faint, magical blue light.
"What the hell is this thing? It's glowing?" Su Ming stared intently at the palm-sized, glowing cyan object, utterly baffled.
After several minutes of examination, he still couldn't identify the object. He could only regard it as an enigma. He was furious—he'd lost 55 yuan! Could that female delivery driver have been a con artist, passing off some random thing as a package and fleeing with the money?
*Yes, that must be it.*
*Even someone as smart as me fell for such a stupid trick. Damn it, that woman is pure evil.*
Su Ming cursed her entire female lineage, including herself. If he ever saw her again, he'd kick her in the ass.
*Just my luck...* Su Ming grumbled, tossing the object onto the sofa. He finally realized he'd been an idiot. That woman had been in such a hurry to slip away—he should have caught on immediately.
*Whoosh!* Suddenly, as Su Ming's face darkened as if someone owed him a hundred thousand yuan, the blue light-emitting object suddenly emitted a brilliant azure glow. The light was so intense that Su Ming instinctively closed his eyes for several seconds.
When he opened them again, he found the object had done something extraordinary: it had enveloped the living room in a virtual space that seemed to isolate it from the outside world.
"What the hell is going on? How did it create this bizarre space? Huh? I don't feel like I'm home anymore. I'm in some mysterious environment!" Su Ming stared around in astonishment. His house was still his house, but now it seemed transparent and ethereal.
Curiosity piqued, Su Ming reached out to pick up the blue object. Suddenly, his body lit up, and the object vanished from his hand, merging into his body. An odd sensation washed over him, as if something had been abruptly added, yet he couldn't quite explain what it was...