"Now, ladies," Maniac Minion says, waving his hands ineffectually. "I'm sure there's enough of me to share."
"Shut up," both Scout Minions say, one arrogantly and in complete fury, and the other one reassuringly and confidently – as if to say "I've got this."
"I'm carvin' you up first," Scout Minion says to her clone. As if out of nowhere, a pair of dual blades to match her own appear in the grasp of the copy.
"That's what the others wanted to do, too. They saw their better half and decided to fight it rather than just give up like they should have," she leans forward with a predatory grin. "I suppose you're all about the same amount of stupid," the clone's eyes gleam ambitiously. "I'm sure we can have Master imagine some shit for you to clean up after we're done humiliating you and reminding you what your place is, mmm?"
Catalyzed by its words, Scout Minion leans in for the cut.
"After all~" the clone starts with a truly incredulous confidence, "that's probably the only thing I'd let you be better at than me!"
Not another word comes out. In a blink-fast instant, Scout impales her jaw shut with a cross from her dual blades. The clone flinches to retaliate, but Scout quits her own blades, lodged firmly into her opponent, and takes those of her enemy, impaling those two into her skull as well. Scout Minion leans in just as a torrent of white blood gushes out of her fake.
"The only thing I'd ever let you be better at than me, Sister," Scout starts as she leans in, "is fertilizer!" With a kick and a spin, she sends the clone off the massive pedestal, hundreds of meters off into the wall, over the waterfall, and into the massive pool below. She tugged one of the blades in the technique, preserving it for future and probably quite prompt use.
The crowd, because it is what they know best, applauds.
"Wait, wait. You're not supposed to clap to that!" Maniac Minion shouts before turning around to the invader. "She was like, way better than you, Scout."
She grins back, and is about to lecture him, when his face lights up in realization.
"Oh yeah!" he scoffs. He snaps his fingers, and in a flash of light, there's another perfect copy of Scout Minion: white bathing suit and all.
"Whoops," the new Scout Minion says as she draws her own dual blades with a knowing smile. "Not quite as easy as you thought, was it?"
Scout Minion produces a single irritated grunt as she prepares her singular blade for the fight… and what a fight it is.
Throwing propriety to the wind, the attendants pile in. Her speed is the only defense she has from the dozens, and then hundreds of weapons and projectiles flying her way. She's trained in this kind of thing. It is far from the first time that she'd had to take out more than one opponent, but it is the first time she'd had to take on more than one fictional opponent that didn't truly exist.
She feels a bolt shot by a fake Crossbow Minion graze across her cheek, and she feels the cold white blood of her infusia marking her. The damage to her is real, but with every one she defeats, a copy takes its place seconds later. She meets the strike of a clone of Combat Minion, faster, dumber, and angrier than the real thing. Scout Minion can only skirt around the edge of the formation as they rush her down from every corner. It seems more of them appear in the blink of an eye, as if unfolding from the near air to bring her low.
She won't have it.
Scout Minion fights on fast and hard, disarming one enemy and using said armament to strike at another. The other real minions can be forgiven. They aren't exactly the fighting types, but her? This is what she knows best.
And then, looming tall within the crowd, is only one that could distract her.
"Well, look who we have here," Overlord Chaos says, or at least something that appears to be him.
In the split second of her hesitation, Scout winces from the pain as Ninja Minion stabs deep into her with one of his tanto knives.
"You," she flinches before spitting out infusia. "You cheated."
Overlord Chaos's face shifts into another face, and then another, and another. Most denizens of the universe have issues telling minions of Chaos apart. Those blessed with ether tend to lose most of their defining features… that is, until one becomes a minion of High Overlord Chaos themselves, in which case they can see every micron of uniqueness to the faces, antennas, jaws, eyes, and otherwise, and the thing that was Chaos is taunting her with everything it has: it ceases to have a face at all.
Like an amorphous blob of all ether creatures she'd seen, the Chaos-thing lumbers towards her with a wild, fluctuating grin.
"Cheated?" it asks her. "This is my world. I'm only playing by my rules," it says with a smile before it nonchalantly snaps its fingers.
A jagged knife appears out of nowhere, manifesting directly in her stomach, and she collapses onto her knees as she feels her internal organs part from the sharpness inside her.
With applause and laughter from Maniac Minion's evil retinue, the little lord of this world gives a confident, all-knowing, all-powerful, all-loved grin. "Well, there you have it, biiiitch!" he says, leaning in to deliver a single laugh of untouchable triumph.
Everyone but the dangling true minions laugh at Scout, and her enchanted blood spray helplessly onto the nice marble floor.
Maniac Minion watches the white flow out of her for a moment with a bemused superiority as the sound of combat far away, masked from their quick tussle, becomes more and more audible, as if encroaching up the walls of the city and headed their way.
Scout hears it now and connects the dots in her head. Yes, while all the others are fake, herself and Maniac Minion's antenna work as intended, and they can feel the magic signature coming closer. Even in a dream, it works for them. Even in a dream, they can feel a Reinish Knight approaching. Her heart, buried deep under a metric ton of ether comprising her body, beats just a notch faster as she identifies the unique signature of the man.
"Uh, who's that?" Maniac Minion asks with a suddenly unnerved smile.
She scoffs, choking out some more white blood. "Do you even need to ask?" she interrupts. She attempts to stumble up to her feet and gets a short moment of edgewise, just as an armored bolt bursts up from the side of the wall. In an explosive landing, bricks and dust turn up for a dozen meters in all directions. It's like a cannonball hit the pedestal.
In a moment, it clears to show the shining white armor of Royal Knight Justice, the underplatings shining blue as if the man were glowing under all that enchanted metal.
"This is the source of it," he says, his visor pulsing with the tenor of his voice. He turns to the throne. "It's hiding… there."
"W-what's hiding?" Super Insane Maniac Minion says as he tries to squirm over for his ultimate epic weapon. Of course, in most other realities, his ultimate epic weapon is just his very irritating and disaster-prone personality. But here, in his perfect world, he wields a mighty blade known throughout the annals of history as Death Killer.
…
Don't look at me. He's the one that came up with the name, and he thinks it's "hella tight" in his own words.
Knight Justice's head arches forward as he brandishes his sword, a true epic weapon, and flicks it from all the dream blood of the false creatures he'd had to cut through to get up here.
"Demon, show yourself," Justice commands.
"I'll show ya deez NUTS!" the yelping Super Insane Maniac Minion shouts as he points the blade at him, shooting a magic bolt of pure power at Justice. Justice only needs to lift up his blade and intercept the bolt to neutralize it completely.
Everyone's silent for a moment in awe-stricken horror.