Any and all playfulness this man harboured had vanished entirely, as if the fallen tree zapped it all away in a mere instant. All Tao Hua could do was stare up at that scowling complexion, realizing he didn't quite enjoy this version of Shan Si.
In fact, he wasn't nearly as handsome as the one who adamantly laid hands, regardless of the discomfort Tao Hua had felt. It was better than dealing with whatever had angered this man so.
The thought of their first encounter in the Tao Estate was enough to send a chill down Tao Hua's spine and spread goosebumps along his skin. It also deepened the hollow grooves of his eyes, clouding the circles with more exhaustion.
Lifting his hands up to his arms, he hugged them, rubbing along the fabric in an attempt to create friction. It troubled him—Shan Si's persistence on his book, and whatever it was written inside that bothered him.
When he looked up at Shan Si, he saw a focused man ridden with bloodlust, only staring at the path ahead. Tao Hua wasn't sure if he had blinked once, given just how strained those pale eyes looked with each bloodshot vein.
Then, Tao Hua looked over his shoulder once more, his teeth chattering. The tree had long vanished into the shadows—shadows that were no longer welcoming and dead silent. There wasn't a speck of green in sight, as every inch of their already travelled path had been painted grey, fogged by a dull and dreary atmosphere.
It was terrifying. A completely unpleasant sight one couldn't remove their eyes from. Not because dead forests were a sight to behold—anything but! It was when Tao Hua looked ahead; he saw greenery, but when he looked back behind them, it was no longer green.
That illusion was fading fast; however. As if the woods responded to this man's emotions.
If that were the case… Tao Hua thought, turning his head back, glancing down at the ground. It was also peculiar, unable to make up its mind between grey and green. Why get so worked up over a fat, ugly tree?
Tao Hua's fingers crawled up his shoulders, and in a small voice, he finally said, "I…I don't g-get it…"
"What's there not to get?" Shan Si laughed. It was colder than the air that had slowly started to drop in temperature around them. "I knew something of amiss when I first picked up the book back in your hometown. You know, when you crashed into me on the street?"
Tao Hua stopped grazing his arms, but his finger slowly traced along the seam of his upper sleeves.
"So, I played the part of whatever seemed to entice you most, and took it," he said plainly, as if there wasn't weight attached to the words he'd spew. "You protected that book more than your own heart; which, you sucked at."
There was a trace of forlorn lingering on his last sentence. But as quick as it was to arrive, it left in the blink of an eye and became more irritated.
"God, that pissed me off—it was so naive and innocent." Shan Si hand lifted to his sword, pressing his thumb against the pommel. That was the one moment in this entire conversation his face twisted between ache and ferocity. "Why else would I have done the things I did back in that bookstore? One touch of the chin, and the book was mine. You need to be more careful."
Slowly, Tao Hua's hands fell down his arms, and limped to his sides the moment his shoulders slumped. His walking became a bit more sluggish, just as he watched his own feet stomp into the ground as if trying to keep Tao Hua going.
I see why his personality kept switching now… he thought. It was all him trying to play someone he wasn't.
Though he didn't want to admit it, a part of him had hoped there was some truth to this man's words. But the more he looked back on their first encounter, the more every action Shan Si attempted made more sense with his explanation.
Each time he'd reach in, compliment him, or touch him, it usually had to do with the book being nearby. None of it was for him, and it never was.
Even so, why continue it afterwards? Ugh, none of it made sense, and he could think through the way his heart throbbed dully.
"But that's where it becomes strange, and I still can't make sense of it, Tao Hua. When we parted ways on that abandoned road, as soon as you ran, it was gone." The tip of Shan Si's thumb whitened, just as his pupils shrank. "I tried everything; skimmed through it, tried to read between the lines until I realized each story wasn't just a story; they were strangely similar to all the things you've said about yourself back in Siyue Town. Which had me thinking… this book, it has to be attached to you. I'm not sure if you understand, but the relics are alive—they're old souls. I should know."
Despite this, Tao Hua couldn't seem to respond; his chin only wrinkled as he listened to Shan Si drone on.
"Relics have the ability to tether their energy, much like skilled cultivators; it's miraculous and defies all fundamentals." Shan Si lifted up his arm—the one he'd stored the book in earlier. He looked down at it, eerily captivated by the sight of the swaying sleeve. "I need you to understand I'm skilled with many years under my belt; I know what it takes to control elements. But I want to make one thing clear, Tao Hua: I didn't give a shit if that fire killed anyone. Your father could perish and my life would remain—no, it would be better."
All of that hopelessness froze over and transpired into fear, and Tao Hua could feel the cold envelop his lungs with each wheezing breath.
"But you did care, which is when I knew the book and its energy only responded to your whining. Otherwise, I wouldn't giving you that talisman would have been digging my own grave."
"Then…why?" asked Tao Hua, his voice cracking with each pause. Everything he said was spoken as though he was seeking a different answer—one that could remedy all the terrible things Shan Si was saying. "Why give it to me? What if I did use it on you?"
"You wouldn't," he laughed, lowering his hand. "The same way you couldn't risk seeing your own abusive father killed. But it did soothe you enough to keep things at bay instead of transpiring. Think of it as a test rather than a gamble. I knew the laws and studied the material well, and the material was the easiest I've ever—"
"Stop," Tao Hua said, his lower lip clipping into his top. He mumbled a few more times, stomping ahead like a deadman walking. "Just…stop. Get to the point already. I can't…I don't need a backstory."
For a small man, this one was strong enough to keep choking back the hurt that desperately wanted to explode.
Shan Si finally looked over at him, his expression quiet and emotionless. After a moment longer of Tao Hua stumbling along, he said, "Fine. How are you controlling the book? Something is messing with the array of the forest, and you know how the saying goes. I'm no idiot."
Unfortunately.
Tao Hua did, and he knew it all too well. The saying, to be exact, was: Once is an accident, twice is a coincidence, three times is a pattern. However, the saying could still exist while both parties still remained oblivious to the fact. Tao Hua wasn't aware the book held that much value to anyone else other than himself.
Hesitating, Tao Hua lifted his trembling hands to his chest. He looked down at them, watching as the reddened tips of each finger twitched. They were freezing and cold to the touch. So he pressed them to his chest.
He was right… Tao Hua breathed against the hands, his breath fogging his vision with each sound of "haw". It was a cold he hadn't experienced before; figuratively and metaphorically. It's better to keep things less personal--there's nothing between us. I was a fool to ever think it could be the other way around.
So, he replied, "The book isn't mine."
Shan Si stopped for a moment, but Tao Hua kept going, focusing solely on warming his hands.
"Lies," said Shan Si, but as Tao Hua didn't answer and kept trailing ahead mindlessly, Shan Si would run up and grab his hand, dragging a hand away from his mouth. Shocked, Tao Hua's head darted toward him, his eyes widening as the peach reflected the face of a desperate man.
"Tell me the truth."
In response to his own throbbing heart, Tao Hua surprised himself. He returned Shan Si's anger with his own, and it was done powerfully enough to echo through the forest. So much so that the entire enchanted facade faded like a pile of leaves facing a hurricane.
Every tree, bush, twig, and rock dimmed, and each lurking creature scampered away, leaving the two shrouded in silence. With his chest heaving, Tao Hua glared up at Shan Si, who seemed completely stricken with shock.
But what were those words that held such weight? Well, they were quite simple, actually. Said many times by many people, all unlike Tao Hua. But what made these words sound so different this time is that they were said with such force; it didn't match the body sputtering them.
They went, as said:
"PISS OFF ALREADY!"
Tao Hua was at his wit's end with this terrifying, grumpy kidnapper. He just wanted to sleep.
Chapter end.