Candace
First came the smell followed by the pain crashing into me all at once like a brutal wave determined to drown me with it.
The rancid stench of pig dung mixed with dried blood and damp hay filled my lungs while agony throbbed violently through every inch of my body.
My ribs screamed with every breath I took. The burn stretched across my back had stiffened overnight, leaving the skin raw, swollen, and painfully tight.
Even shifting slightly against the hay hurt.
I lay there motionless for a long moment, staring blankly at the crooked wooden ceiling above me while silent tears slid from the corners of my eyes into the straw beneath my face.
They hadn't believed me. I had almost been raped. If I hadn't used the bottle on Dylan, I would have… a tortured sob left my lips.
Why did nobody ever believe assaulted victims? Why would I make up something like that in the first place?
Around me, the pigs snorted softly in their sleep. At some point during the night, one of the guards must have dumped me back here after I passed out.
The sty door sat slightly ajar, allowing thin rays of morning sunlight to spill through the gap and that was when I remembered my savior.
Panic jolted through me instantly.
I pushed myself upright too quickly, and white-hot agony detonated through my ribs hard enough to force a sharp hiss between my teeth. My vision blurred immediately while dizziness rolled through me in waves.
"Fuck…"
I stayed frozen for several seconds, breathing shallowly through the pain before finally forcing myself to look around the sty desperately.
There was no glimpse of her muddy white fur or her whining. Relief collapsed through me so suddenly my body nearly sagged with it.
If Aunt Elena found her, I would already know.
Slowly, I forced myself fully upright.
Pain radiated through my battered body immediately. My left eye remained swollen nearly shut while every breath scraped against my ribs like jagged glass lodged inside my chest.
Cuts covered my arms and legs from being dragged across stones the night before. Some wounds had crusted over with dried blood already while others still oozed slowly down my skin.
The bruises looked worse now. Dark purple and blue stains spread across my body in ugly patches.
It took three attempts before I could finally stand on my feet. A knock echoed against the sty door.
I flinched instinctively before slowly limping toward it one painful step at a time. The door barely qualified as a real barrier anymore.
The wood had warped from rain years ago, and the hinges creaked violently whenever it moved. I needed to find a way to attach a proper latch to it.
Though honestly, if someone truly wanted inside, this pathetic excuse for a door would never stop them anyway. The thought made my stomach twist.
I finally reached the entrance and pulled it open slowly. Jules stood outside immediately wrinkling her nose.
"You reek," she gagged while covering her nose dramatically with two fingers. "Go and take a bath."
Because apparently living in a pig sty was meant to smell like roses.
Jules worked as Aunt Elena's personal maid, and like her mistress, she was snobbish.
"Maybe you should try living inside a pig sty for an hour," I snapped bitterly while leaning against the doorframe for support.
Her eyes narrowed immediately. "I see yesterday's beating didn't knock the attitude out of you after all."
She held up a garment bag and a small cosmetics case.
"Lady Elena, in her infinite mercy, instructed me to bring these for you." Her lips curled slightly. "Get dressed. There's a memorial to attend."
My stomach dropped instantly. I took the garment bag from her slowly before unzipping it just enough to glimpse the black dress hidden inside. It was one of Deidre's hand me downs.
Tears burned the corner of my eyes.
"I'm not going."I whispered hoarsely before shoving the bag back toward her.
I refused. I absolutely refused to let Aunt Elena use River's memorial as another opportunity to humiliate me publicly. Again.
Jules smiled calmly, reaching into her apron pocket before pulling out a folded piece of paper.
"My lady assumed you'd say that," she said lightly. "She told me to give you this first."
Dread crawled instantly beneath my skin. I plucked the paper from her hand, before unfolding it carefully.
Get dressed. Come to the memorial. Or I'll find the filthy mongrel, and that ugly dog and make it pay for what it did to my poor son.
Rage exploded through me so fast my hands began shaking violently. That evil bitch was threatening Cookie.
I crushed the paper tightly inside my fist while Jules stood there examining her nails with complete boredom.
"Fine," I spat furiously.
Without another word, Jules turned and walked away. I slammed the sty door shut behind her, but the weak wood only bounced open again with a pathetic creak.
I stood motionless in the middle of the sty holding the garment bag while helpless fury churned violently inside my chest.
Aunt Elena did not force me into Deidre's old clothes out of kindness or charity. For three years, She milked every opportunity to show the pack how low Candace Sinclair had fallen and how she was the gracious aunt taking care of me despite my sins.
The former Alpha's daughter reduced to wearing hand-me-downs from the girl who replaced her. The only reason I would go was because Cookie's life mattered more than my pride.
My gaze drifted downward absently and that was when I saw a small brown package rested beside the wall near the door.
I had not seen it earlier. My pulse quickened slightly. Someone must have left it while I slept. Slowly, I crouched despite the sharp protest from my ribs before carefully opening the package.
There were bandages, antiseptics, plasters, and a small tube of salve for burns neatly packed together.
A broken sob escaped me instantly. I sat there on the filthy floor clutching the supplies tightly against my chest while fresh tears spilled down my cheeks.
"Thank you," I whispered shakily to nobody.
"Whoever you are… thank you."
At least someone in this pack still saw me as human. I never knew who kept leaving these things for me.
And honestly? I was terrified to find out.
Anyone caught helping me openly would be punished horribly.
After forcing myself through an agonizingly cold bath inside the tiny washroom attached to the sty, I cleaned and bandaged the wounds I could reach before finally slipping on the black dress.
Of course it was beautiful. Everything Deidre owned was beautiful. The gown hugged my waist softly before flowing toward the floor in elegant folds. Long sleeves concealed most of the bruises covering my arms while the dark fabric helped hide the cuts across my skin.
The only mirror I owned was a broken shard saved from one of Deidre's shattered vanity mirrors years ago. I used it now to apply makeup carefully over the bruises on my face.
Aunt Elena would expect every mark hidden.
My swollen eye proved impossible to fully conceal though. Eventually, I gave up trying.
Holding the mirror up one final time, I stared silently at my reflection.
The girl looking back at me had copper-blonde hair and golden eyes and a face that still carried traces of the beautiful girl I used to be before grief and cruelty hollowed her out from the inside. For one painful moment, I barely recognized myself.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
The cemetery rested along the eastern border of the packhouse beneath towering oak trees whose twisted branches stretched darkly across the gloomy morning sky.
Pack members dressed in black gathered silently among the gravestones while soft weeping drifted through the cold air.
I stopped breathing the moment I saw the epitaph.
River Pendragon. Beloved son and brother. Gone too soon.
Pain tightened instantly around my heart.
River had been the fourth Pendragon brother.
They had been quadruplets, not triplets.
But after his death, nobody called them that anymore.
God, I missed him. River always knew how to make people laugh no matter how miserable things became. He had this ridiculous crooked grin that usually appeared right before he did something mischievous.
One time, Reign and Ryker switched all my dolls around just to annoy me while I was studying. I spent nearly an hour screaming at them before River appeared wearing one of Ryker's jackets while performing a dramatic puppet show apology with the dolls.
Even Ragnor laughed that day. River held them together. He understood all his brothers in ways nobody else did.
He could calm Ryker down before his anger exploded. He dragged Ragnor out of his moods whenever guilt consumed him too deeply.
Reign followed him into trouble constantly because River somehow made recklessness feel fun instead of dangerous. He was the glue holding them together and now he was buried beneath cold earth.
My gaze slowly lifted toward the three brothers standing beside their mother.
Ragnor's expression looked carved from stone, but pain and guilt lingered heavily behind his grey eyes. Ryker stood rigid beside him with bloodshot eyes and fists clenched tightly enough to tremble.
Reign stood slightly apart from them.
His black hair looked messy and unkempt while exhaustion shadowed his face heavily.
There was no teasing smile on his lips today.
Around me, the pack members had noticed my arrival.
"What is the murderer doing here?"
"The nerve of this cursed dog, showing up here with that face!"
"After what she did? She should have been beheaded like her father."
Each word sliced into me sharply. Normally, I learned how to let their hatred pass through me but today it hurt too much.
River was my friend too. I had loved him.
And every single morning since his death, I woke up haunted by the same unbearable question.
Did I really kill him?
If given the choice, I would have visited tonight after dark when nobody else remained here. I would have stood quietly beside his grave alone where nobody could see me mourning my precious River.
Suddenly, an arm looped through mine, and every muscle in my body locked when a floral scent whipped into my nostrils.
Deidre pressed herself beside me, sobbing and dabbing at her red-rimmed eyes with a napkin while fake sobs shook her shoulders dramatically enough to draw everyone's attention immediately.
Of course.
She wanted the pack watching the girl who tried to save River standing beside the monster accused of killing him.
Hot anger surged violently through me.
How could she still do this? How could she stand here beside River's grave pretending innocence when she knew exactly what happened that night?
I tried pulling away but her grip tightened immediately.
"The dress looks lovely on you, cousin," she murmured sweetly. "You should come by my room sometime. I could help sort through more clothes for you."
I ripped my arm away from her, the whispers around us grew louder instantly but I did not care anymore. I needed answers.
"Enough with the act," I hissed beneath my breath. "You can fool everyone else with this performance, but not me." My pulse hammered painfully. "What happened that night, Deidre?"
Her expression widened innocently.
"What are you talking about?"
"You called me," I snapped while grabbing her arm before she could move away. "You texted me saying you needed help. You begged me to come."
My breathing quickened.
"The next thing I remember was waking up with River's blood all over me and a knife in my hand." My voice cracked painfully. "What happened that night? Why did you trap me?"
For one single second, she maintained her fake innocence before her mask slipped, the sweetness vanishing completely.
Coldness gleamed inside her brown eyes instead.
"You really think I'd tell you?" she whispered.
The fake tears disappeared instantly.
"I got tired of them worshipping you while I faded into the background," she murmured coldly.
My stomach dropped.
"Reign smiled differently whenever he looked at you," she continued bitterly. "Ragnor would've ripped his own heart out if it kept you safe. Ryker followed you around like some pathetic lovesick dog." Her fingers tightened around my sleeve. "Even River always chose you first."
The cemetery suddenly felt freezing.
"Four Alphas. Four. And not one of them ever spared me a second glance while you were in the room."
"And after your father betrayed the pack," she whispered harshly, "they still defended you."
Shock hollowed me out completely.
"Did… did you do all this just to get their attention? You did it for them?" My voice sounded horribly small as I stared at my twisted cousin.
Her smile widened slowly.
"I did it for me."
I sucked in a gasp, pain rifling through me.
"Now look at you," she murmured softly. "A precious princess turned into a disgusting little pest."
Then suddenly, she leaned closer.
"You should thank me, Candy," she whispered against my ear. "You walked into that forest yourself. Whatever happened that night, you were the only one holding the knife."
My breath caught. That was not an answer.
Did she kill him?
"What did you do, Deidre?" I whispered.
Her smile widened.
"I did nothing, sweet cousin. You did it all by yourself. At least you weren't beheaded too."
She stepped back immediately afterward, her mask sliding in place. My sweet innocent cousin reappeared, my stomach twisting violently.
All those years, all those secrets I shared with her, every conversation about the triplets, every dream, every stupid fairytale fantasy.
She hated me the entire time. Oh Goddess. While still reeling from the shock, Deidre suddenly grabbed my hand and shoved herself backward dramatically.
"What are you accusing me of?" she gasped loudly. "River's memorial day isn't enough for you? You still want to hurt me?"
"Stop lying!" I snapped furiously. "People deserve to know the truth."
A chilling smile crossed her face.
"No one gives a rat-ass shit about what happened years ago. They won't believe you."
"No one gives a shit about what happened years ago," she giggled softly. "And even if they did, nobody would ever believe you."
"No one gives a shit about what happened years ago?" I repeated.
A growl split the air directly behind me, low and volcanic and every muscle in my body froze.
"What?" Ryker's voice was rough, and dangerously close, I could feel the heat of him at my back.
"What the fuck did you just say?"