Chapter 91: Kanzaki Akira, Emotional Mentor
The words had barely left her lips before a wave of regret washed over Mitsuri.
She and Kanzaki Akira were just friends, weren't they? Asking such a personal question was definitely overstepping her bounds, especially since they had only met three times in total…
A strange, sharp pang bloomed in her chest, but she quickly pushed the uncomfortable feeling down, preparing to apologize for her forwardness.
Before she could utter a word, however, her simple soul and naive understanding of romance were dealt a staggering blow by Akira's answer.
"I don't just have a lover," he said calmly. "I have more than one."
"Eh—?!"
Suddenly, Mitsuri's mind was in an uproar.
On one hand, as a friend, she knew it wasn't her place to pry into Akira's private life.
On the other hand, a gossipy spirit innate to any young woman was beginning to stir restlessly within her.
And beneath it all, that baffling sourness deep in her heart kept surging up, refusing to be ignored.
These conflicting thoughts tangled together, causing Mitsuri's straightforward brain to overload in an instant. Her large, emerald-green eyes went vacant, and it seemed as if dizzying, mosquito-coil spirals were spinning in her vision.
Akira had, in fact, intended to let Mitsuri know about Makomo and the others. He hadn't planned for it to be this soon, but since she'd asked, he decided to go with the flow. It was something she would have to face sooner or later.
He wasn't some master of deception, juggling schedules and lies, and he still possessed a shred of a conscience. Being honest was the only response that truly honored the feelings of the women who had placed their trust in him.
Besides, their current connection wasn't yet so deep. Even if Mitsuri learned about the others now, it shouldn't be too difficult for her to accept. After all, they were still just friends who had met a mere three times.
This was true even if Akira harbored less-than-pure intentions toward her, and even if he held a very special place in her heart.
He just hadn't anticipated the impact of his confession would be quite so great. It seemed to have completely fried her circuits.
"Mitsuri? Mitsuri? Are you okay?"
Akira waved a hand in front of her unfocused eyes, calling her name twice more before her brain finally managed to reboot.
"Ugh… I'm fine." Once her mind came back online, Mitsuri met Akira's concerned gaze and gave a weak shake of her head. She then lowered her gaze, her voice dropping to a stammer.
"Um… that is… I…"
Before she could even form a proper sentence, a deep blush of shame had already crept up her neck and flooded her face. Her soft, rosy cheeks were now even more vibrant than the pink kimono she wore.
"Is there something you want to ask?" Akira prompted gently. "Or has the perfect image you had of me shattered, leaving you disappointed? Or maybe… you think I'm a shameless womanizer and you want to scold me?"
"Yes—ah, no, it's not that! That's not right either…" Hearing his questions, Mitsuri nodded and shook her head in rapid succession. Her newly rebooted brain seemed to be running on a single track, unable to process more than one thought at a time.
After a few more confused gestures, she finally managed to sort out what she wanted to say.
"Mitsuri doesn't want to blame you, Brother Kanzaki," she began, her voice small. "And I'm not disappointed in you. It's just… I just feel a little uncomfortable… I can't describe it. It's like eating a sweet sakuramochi, but finding a sour, unripe plum inside."
The young woman, whose thoughts were still so wonderfully simple, had completely failed to identify the emotion known as 'jealousy.' She just frowned slightly, attempting to describe her inner turmoil with her innocent tone and unique metaphors.
But Mitsuri had been taught since she was a child that if you encountered something you didn't understand, you should take the initiative and ask. In her eyes, Akira, who had even helped her master her own strength, was the perfect person to consult.
So, she looked up at him and asked, "Brother Kanzaki, do you know why I feel this way?"
Hearing her unique metaphor and the earnest question that followed, Akira was at a bit of a loss. He had imagined how she might react upon learning of his… complicated love life. He had considered various ways to handle it. But he had never, in all his imaginings, predicted this particular scene.
A girl who was feeling jealous because of him was now asking him to explain what jealousy was and why she was feeling it.
'This is… a novel experience,' Akira thought, a wry smile touching his lips.
Looking into those simple, trusting eyes, he found he couldn't withstand her unintentional charm. He cleared his throat and began to explain.
"If we're talking about the reason, to put it simply, it's because you care."
"Huh?" Mitsuri tapped her lower lip with her index finger, her head tilting in confusion.
"It's like how Shota might snatch Hikari's snacks because he really likes them," Akira elaborated, using a simple analogy. "He doesn't want to share with Hikari; he wants them all for himself."
"When we're faced with beautiful, beloved, or important things—or people—we all instinctively develop a sense of possessiveness. When you discover that the person or thing you care about doesn't belong exclusively to you, that possessiveness gives rise to that sour, uncomfortable feeling."
He leaned in slightly, his voice softening. "So, the reason you're feeling uncomfortable is that, in your heart, I'm a very important person. Someone you care about a great deal. Because you care, you want to possess me, and that's why you felt that pang when you learned I have other lovers."
"That emotion is generally called 'jealousy.' Just as you said, it makes your heart feel sour, as if a jar of vinegar has been spilled across the fields of your heart, soaking everything in its tartness. Though, for what it's worth, I think your description is much cuter."
Mitsuri nodded as if she half-understood, then shook her head again.
"Ugh… but why? Friends and lovers are different. When I've made friends before, I never cared if they had other friends. Why is it different this time…?"
Looking at her utterly guileless expression, a pang of guilt pricked at Akira's conscience. The scene felt dangerously close to that of a corrupt uncle luring an innocent girl astray. Given her current state, he was fairly certain that if he sold her, she'd probably thank him for the good price while happily counting the money.
"As for why you feel differently about me," he said, his voice gentle, "that's a question you'll have to ask yourself. In your heart, who am I to you? What is our relationship? Or perhaps… who do you want me to be to you?"
This time, Akira didn't answer her question directly. He turned it back on her.
In her current dazed state, he knew that if he pressed the issue and tried to define their relationship, she would very likely agree. But that would be far too hasty.
Including today, they had only met three times. Mitsuri didn't even know what he did for a living. Establishing a relationship so carelessly would be building it on a foundation of sand. It wouldn't last, it certainly wouldn't pass muster with her parents, and it might even scare her into cutting ties with him completely.
"Ugh…" Hearing his questions, Mitsuri's mind dissolved into a tangled mess once more.
"It's okay if you can't figure it out right now," Akira said, reaching out to gently rub her head. "You're still young, Mitsuri. You have plenty of time to think about it. I'm just going to use the restroom; you can wait for me here for a bit."
Seeing her distress, he decided to give her some space to cool down and sort through her complicated new feelings.
"Oh…"
Mitsuri, her thoughts still in a chaotic whirl, just nodded dazedly. It didn't even occur to her that this was only Akira's second time visiting her home, and no one had ever told him where the restroom was.
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