The few minutes I spent outside simply enjoying the fresh air and cool drizzle were both excruciatingly long and also rather awkward, because on the one hand I was rather happy to have this time to myself, but...
It was just a reminder that the room inside wasn't really 'my' space, and that if I went back inside I would be exposed once again to that silence and to Valentina's heavy gaze, even if the woman herself never meant for it to be as overwhelming as I felt it to be.
Her constant stillness was something that felt heavy to me, and I had to admit there was a part of me that was afraid that I would never be able to get accustomed to how she made me feel... though at the same time I was slowly warming up to the idea of being near her long enough for that to happen...
