I had no class that day
yet I was on my way to my campus
I longed for a ' friend ' majoring in psychology
So I decided I'd sit through the ' developmental psychology ' class, it just so happen that it was a large lecture.
According to the rumors on campus the professor didn't take attendance, how convenient for me to sneak in.
I was in no rush that day, so I purposely took a detour, turns out it was a great decision.
Because it so happens that I made a chance encounter...
I saw a young lady, standing on the pedestrian walkway of the bridge
the way she looked at the water reminded me of the woman I met yesterday
yet she didn't attempt anything like that woman
she wasn't crying
she wasn't shouting
honestly, she looked just ordinary.
After a while, she just resumed walking.
I had so many questions going through my mind at once
but most importantly, I was thrilled when I realised we were heading in the same direction. Once on campus, we went to the same lecture ' developmental psychology '.
I couldn't stop the smile that was slowly forming on my face
Once inside the hall, I delliberatly took the seat next to hers
the lecture was incredibly boring
it once again reminded me of my lack of interest in such classes
despite it been about my recent ' obsession '.
After the lecture ended, just as she was about to pack her back, I finally opened my mouth
' hey '
she looked at me and immediately replied
' hi, are you new here?, new student?, nice to meet you my name is Milan, you can call me Milli, what's your name? I can show you around if you want...'
As she kept going I became more and more surprised.
I had imagined her to be depressed or having herself getting internally eaten by whatever motivated her to look at that water that way
but no
she was smiling so brightly
enthusiastic and somehow full of rigor
I had to take a second to process it, but I didn't let my surprise show
' I'm Fallon, I'm a software engineering student, what brought me here today is my curiosity '
I said as a put on a bright practiced smile
' Oh I heard you software students don't like these kind of history format lectures, and even more less psychology as a whole '
indeed, it was very boring
but that was a stereotype I didn't appreciate.
' Is that so ? '
I started packing and followed her making small talks on the way
' wanna grab dinner together? '
How could I say no?
' sure '
' great I'll take you to the best BBQ street stand ever, I'll treat you to some skewers '
' sure '
We settled on a street stand, the meat was indeed good
but that was not my purpose?
what better environment than this one to pry someone's personal info?
I was never a patient person,
" building trust " and what not didn't apply to me
' let's have a drink? '
' naahh I'll pass, I'll have water '
' you don't drink? '
' I do '
' trying to quite ? '
' no '
' huh? '
' I'm trying to control myself, drinking now isn't good, I'll accompany you another day, 'kay? ' ( winked )
' sure '
' oh yeah, do you like music ? '
' kinda '
' do you know DN boys? '
' an Idol group? '
' yeah I really appreciate their music '
' you love music ? '
' actually I love writing lyrics and poems '
' Wish I said no to eating out ( On my way back home hours later )
I gathered no information
I only now know a few things
she loves music, even more that she loves psychology
once she started going on and on about those DN boys, I couldn't redirect the conversation.
her bias is ' Choi Ye-jun ' , yet she kept talking about ' Kang Min-woo'
another detail is that she seems to have stopped stanning that group
yet she only talked about them all night
also, she does not publish her songs and poems
* Pause, stop walking *
I'm so dumb
I should have asked to read them
maybe it would have given me a hint, * resume walking *
maybe because she feels she can't pursue her passion for music is why she wanted to commit suicide?
but again did she really want to commit suicide?
her way of speaking...
it didn't sound like someone tired of living * sighs *
I might be wasting my time...
Or not * woke up with a clearer mind *
haha whoever said "Let me sleep on it."
was right
the information I have isn't as useless as I thought * pacing back and forth *